GM Doug's Flooded King's Court [Outpost III] (Inactive)

Game Master Doug Hahn

This is The Flooded King's Court Outpost III: Putting on the Ritz!

The event runs from March 30 - May 18, 2020.


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SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

This is The Flooded King's Court for Outpost III: Putting on the Ritz!

The event runs from March 30 - May 18, 2020.

Please dot & delete here.


SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

We begin :)

You woke to someone banging on your door at 4 a.m. — how very rude!

It was a courier with a letter from Drandle Dreng. You read the letter, yawning and blinking away your sleep — it contained the instructions for your next assignment:

letter wrote:

Greetings fellow seekers of knowledge!

The Society has been presented with a unique opportunity and I think you’re just the ones to help out. As you have likely heard, Absalom has recently become the home of a group of goblin refugees displaced by the Whispering Tyrant’s armies. They have settled in the Puddles, quite content to live in some of the abandoned buildings there.

We’ve also learned from Ziraya al-Shurati, a Muckrucker in the Puddles, that the goblins have been digging around in the basement of the old playhouse that belonged to the Greater Absalom Performing Arts Guild. They’ve claimed this building as their own. In the process, they stumbled across some manner of beast they could not defeat but instead managed to seal away. With the local guards, the Muckruckers, unwilling to help, we have a perfect opportunity to step in and learn something new about the history of Absalom.

Several of our more experienced goblin Pathfinders have been working hard to build inroads into the goblin community, and this has led to an offer by “king” Zusgut to hear our plea. Your job is to meet Zusgut, explain that we wish his permission to explore beneath his playhouse, and then perform an initial exploration and assessment. You’ll likely not have much time for exploration given the tides probably flood the chambers below each day, but do your best!

Sincerely,

Drandle Dreng

P.S. —

I almost forgot! Eando Kline of the Vigilant Seal is watching this mission closely. He’s worried about ancient evils being released into the world by Pathfinders and what that will do to the public’s impression of us. While I know such things can’t always be avoided, it would be best if you either destroyed anything dangerous that you find down there or if you must bring it back to the Lodge, be very discreet!

----

Now, you find yourself walking through the Puddles district of Absalom, on the way to meet a king.

It's near dawn — mosquitoes thrive in the stagnant water here, and at this hour they're at their most ferocious. As you splash through the gloom, you notice noticing some others going the same way you are. These fellow travelers don't have the poverty-slumped shoulders of the typical Puddles denizen. No. These are fellow Pathfinders!

Please introduce your characters, as you walk through the Puddles! What do we see? Perhaps you might also share how you feel about being out and about this early on the way to meet a Goblin King. There have already been some informal intros in the Discussion tab; perhaps you already know one another. I will be making some secret knowledge checks after we do intros. You may then slot boons.

Envoy's Alliance

Male goblin alchemist 4 | 25’ | HP: 38/38 | AC: 21 | F: +8 R: +11 W: +6; Resist Fire 2 Cold 1 Electric 1 | Reagents 3/8 | Hero Points: 1| Exploration: Scouting | Status:

Reading over the letter as he walks, Gurmire cries out “Why didn’t anyone tell me Absalom had a goblin king!” He seems to be talking to himself.

Looking up just before bumping into a building, he adjust his course. It is at that point that he sees the others wandering around in the early morning.

He starts running towards the group, calling out “Hello! Did you get a mission too?!?

Cheerful, excitable and loud.

On the good side, you notice he has a religious symbol of Sarenrae hanging around his neck. It appears in good shape, so hopefully it isn’t just a trinket he picked up somewhere. His equipment includes studded leather armor, a sling, a light mace and dagger. He also has an assortment of vials hanging off his waist. The type of equipment an alchemist carries with them.

Once he gets close enough, he introduces himself.

Hi! I’m Gurmire! I’m an arson investigator from Magnimar.

Daily Prep:

Sun Rod x2
Moderate Alchemist Fire x2
Moderate Bottled Lightning x2
Minor Elixir of Life x2

Pathfinder Training:
Lesser healing potion
Feather token (ladder)

Horizon Hunters

2 people marked this as a favorite.
F Goblin (irongut) Bard (polymath)/1

This goblin drags around a bag of trinkets and junk that clink and clunk as she walks. The bag is labeled “MERCH AND DICE.” Her clothes are covered in...”adornments” isn’t quite the right word. The various bumps and shapes of various materials—mostly metals—suggest some greater use or complexity, as though her clothes were made of fancy Numeria technology, but they clearly do absolutely nothing. Maybe? Probably? Upon closer inspection, most of the items in her bag seem to be the same.

She has a clean bald head and wears an ill-fitting three piece suit—or rather three pieces of different suits put together—and hums to herself. ”Heys everybodies. We gots to be on da best behaviors if we’re gonna make da big deals with da king, so no being dumb-dumbs today!” She hands out her cards, which are really more like thin card-shaped blocks thanks to all the raised shapes. They say:

“SHWURK
GREEBLER
GREATEST
MERCHANT”

The bottom has in small print:

Title is official and serious and you gots to call her by it, so says the Official Merchants of All the Worlds, or else you gonsta get BIG FINES payable to SHWURK

Vigilant Seal

NG Male Goblin (Unbreakable) Champion 3 | HP 46/46; Shield 20/20 | AC: 21 (23 w/ shield) | F +9 R +8 (+6 vs. non-damaging saves) W +7 | Perc +5 | 20 feet | Hero: 1, Focus: 1/1 | Class DC 19 | Active Conditions: none

A goblin hums his way through the mists, seemingly happy to be here. He's dressed in well maintained leathers with dwarven designs tooled across them. His sword and mace are also smaller versions of what you'd expect to see a dwarf carrying around.

He glances around and almost misses the clearly non-puddles residents, but gets dstracted by Gurmire and heads over. "Nice day, isn't it? Get to meet a king even, any one else excited? Anyone know if there're Crookedtoes there? Meemaw told me my by-o-logic-all parents were from that tribe." He takes Gurmire's hand and gives it a shake. "Nice to meet you Gu... Gur.... Germ-i? I'm Ogren from Kragoddan!"

He then turns and takes Shwurk's card. "Ohhh, I like the card, it's heavy. Could maybe open nuts with it! But are you really the world'S greatest merchant, Sh... She... She work?"

Envoy's Alliance

Male goblin alchemist 4 | 25’ | HP: 38/38 | AC: 21 | F: +8 R: +11 W: +6; Resist Fire 2 Cold 1 Electric 1 | Reagents 3/8 | Hero Points: 1| Exploration: Scouting | Status:

Gurmire accepts the card from Shwurk with a brief “Thank you.” He reads it, then puts it away in his pack.

The letter didn’t say which tribe they were from, just they had to move because of Whispering Tyrant.

He thinks a little bit, then says “I don’t know of any tribes in Lastwall. Do any of you?

Radiant Oath

CG female halfling (twilight halfling) liberator 2 | HP 28/28 | AC 19 (21 with shield) | F +7 R +7 W +7 | Perc +5 | Stealth +3 | Speed:25 ft | Active Conditions: ---

A halfling with gray streaks running through her curly red hair walks through the streets of Absalom, somehow never running into anything despite her focus on the knitting in her hands. Her flail, her short sword, and her shield all have brightly covered knit coverings. Her holy symbol has a butterfly with rays emerging from its wings, a variation on the standard Desnan symbol.

"Goblin King. I don't believe I've met a Goblin King before. I haven't been impressed by most kings, but who knows about a goblin."

Vigilant Seal

1 person marked this as a favorite.
CG Halfling Rogue/Sorcerer | HP 42/42 | AC 21 | Class DC 20 | F: +7, R: +12, W: +9 | Perc: +9 | Speed 30ft | Ranged: Sling +10 1d6+4, Melee: +1 Striking Short Sword +11 2d6 +4 Active conditions: None

”Well, nothing to worry about, Packet Spoonshine, founder of the Sleepy Detective Agency, is on the case.”

This curious halfling has dark black hair, muttonchops, and a crooked smile. He carries a dog-eared spell book in one hand and well carved pipe in the other. His keen eyes are always on the lookout for a clue. Or a snack.

Horizon Hunters

3 people marked this as a favorite.
F Goblin (irongut) Bard (polymath)/1

Shwurk puts her hands on her hips and tilts her chin up at Ogren. "You're not saying it right! Der's no 'e.' It's all one word cause that's the way names work. We all gots names like dis in the Greeblers. My little brother Chwurk THINKS he's a great merchant but he's not. Who wants to buy a stupid club for like fifty millions golds? Nobody! Dat's who. Cause you can pick up a club anywheres! The rarer stuffs is, the more money its worths. So dat's why all Shwurk's stuff is one-of-kinds!" She pulls out a broken chair leg covered in similar raised shapes. "See, now DIS is a club. How many clubs you know made of chair legs? Nothing! That's what. And this has been subjected to the patented Greebling process making it even more Visually Interesting and differents from other stuffs. There's nothing in all the worlds like this! And you should definatelys buy it. Gimme your offers!" She throws Ogren a smug grin. "See, and you doubt Shwurk best merchant evers."

She was inspired by my love of the goblin merchant from Pathfinder: Kingmaker aka Chwurk, so she's his big sister

Envoy's Alliance

820-2001 | "She / Her" | ♫ NG Female Gnome (Fey-Touched) Barrister Bard 8 ♫ | HP 65/88 | AC 23 | F +13 R +15 W +14 | Perc +13 | 35 Speed | Focus 2/2 | Spells 1st 3/3 Spell 2nd 2/3 3rd 3/3 4th 0/3 (DC 25) | Hero Points 0/3 | Campaign Coin 1/1 Active Conditions: Resist Fire 5 & Negative 1; Resist Physical 2; Concealment

Pip is fascinated by Shwurk's display of merchandising. "I never thought of that before. If I never need a chair-leg club, I shall visit your establishment first!"

Meanwhile, Pip packs her law books on to Bailiff, her riding dog. "Now, Bailiff. These are good goblins and you need to be on your best behavior, or I leave you back in the Lodge's stables. Do you understand?"

The dog barks madly, and Pip thinks and rethinks about the wisdom of bringing him into a goblin court. "Alright buddy, I think maybe it is better for you to stay in the stables just this one time." She unpacks her saddle bag, taking only the barest necessities with her, and then runs to catch up with the others. "At least they all have short legs like me!"


1 person marked this as a favorite.
SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

Together, you walk along and try to remember the things you know, or chat with the inhabitants of the Puddles.

Spoiler:

Gurmire, Society: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (10) + 9 = 19
Lirabelle, Diplomacy: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8
Ogren, Diplomacy: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 5 = 10
Packet, Diplomacy: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (15) + 6 = 21
Pip, Diplomacy: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (12) + 9 = 21
Shwurk, Diplomacy: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (1) + 7 = 8

Spoiler:

Gurmire, Society: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (20) + 9 = 29
Ogren, Society: 1d20 + 0 ⇒ (8) + 0 = 8
Packet, Society: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9
Pip, Absalom Lore: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (3) + 8 = 11
Shwurk, Society: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (13) + 5 = 18

Gurmire thinks about what he knows while Packet and Pip chat up the vendors on the street. Together, they learn that the Crookedtoes goblins are led by Zusgut, a king who's obsessed with performance and acting. His tribe has taken over an old playhouse in the Puddles district that no one else wants because the Puddles are slowly sinking.

Shwurk trudges along, considering the legends and mysteries that lurk just below her feet. There are very ancient structures below the Puddles. Such places have been troubled by corporeal undead such as ghouls, ghasts, skeletons, and zombies. She remembers hearing from a friend-of-a friend's grandfather that screams used to occasionally emanate from somewhere deep beneath the streets.

Gurmire, too, thinks about what lurks below… and how there are also are dark rumors surrounding this area of Absalom. He's heard it said the Puddles are a dumping ground for bodies of the murdered, (or perhaps a place where victims are taken before being killed — that seems more convenient). It was known in the past as an area frequented by criminals.

Finally, Shwurk remembers her guild connections — the playhouse was the home of the Greater Absalom Performing Arts Guild for 50 years prior to the earthquake that shook the city 20 years ago. During its heyday, it boasted frequent, well‑attended performances and a particularly vibrant youth program.

----

Ahead looms the playhouse. It's seen better days: the once-majestic facade is crumbling, the exterior’s paint is mostly chipped away, many windows are broken, and the wooden shingles rotten and failing. A few creeping plants grow along the exterior.

You pause and take a breath before stepping through the yawning double-doors…


SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

If you have not done so, please slot boons and choose your school items! You have received the mission briefing and made your knowledge checks for background info. Everyone has at least 1 hero point as noted on the slide.

Vigilant Seal

NG Male Goblin (Unbreakable) Champion 3 | HP 46/46; Shield 20/20 | AC: 21 (23 w/ shield) | F +9 R +8 (+6 vs. non-damaging saves) W +7 | Perc +5 | 20 feet | Hero: 1, Focus: 1/1 | Class DC 19 | Active Conditions: none

Ogren gets a bit of a blank look on his face as Shwruk drones on some, before noticing the doggo. With a polite, "Thank-you for letting me offer for the club but I don't need a club, though I do like chairs and the chair leg." As soon as he can extract himself from the woman he bounds over to the dog. "Can I pet him? Can I pet him... uh, right, pleeeaaaase?"

_________
Ogren visibly vibrates with excitement at hearing that the goblins are Crookedtoes. "OOOHH, I wonder if the uncle I heard Meemaw saying I might still have will be there?" The goblin bounds down the street hoping to meet up with the King as soon as possible and not stopping to talk to the locals at all.

He barely pauses for a moment at the entrance, waiting for everyone to catch up. "Come on! I wanna meet the people who knew and possibly rasied my mother and father! Let's goooooooo!"

Boons and Training:

Ogren is going to slot his Vigilant Seal Champion boon,and bring One-Who-Waits as well, but I don't believe that takes a slot.
For pathfinder training he'll bring a minor healing potion and a Feather Token (Ladder)


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SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

Spoiler:
Lirabelle, Perception: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (1) + 4 = 5
Gurmire, Scout, Perception: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (18) + 5 = 23
Ogren, Perception: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (16) + 3 = 19
Packet, ACTIVITY: 1d20 + 8 ⇒ (16) + 8 = 24
Pip, Perception: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (8) + 6 = 14
Shwurk, Perception: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (13) + 4 = 17

You're hit with pungent smoke and moldy air once you step through the doors.

It's damp inside, and there are puddles of muddy, stagnant water everywhere. A number of birds and insects (especially mosquitos) make their home in the dim light of the building. To alleviate the mosquito problem, the goblins burn torches that produce a thick black smoke. Your eyes water.

You make your way past a smashed box office, velvet carpet spotted with black mold, chewed-up velvet ropes, and smashed furniture. Guttering torches fail to fully illuminate the auditorium itself, but hints of its former majesty can still be discerned from the rococo molding and delicate scrollwork on the banisters. The northern end of the space is occupied by a raised proscenium stage, with a large chair that must have once been used as a throne in a theatrical production long ago. Art on slide 2.

Goblins move throughout the room, some gathered in small clusters roasting food over open fires, others sleeping in what remains of the auditorium’s chairs. On the crumbling balcony, a goblin choir rehearses, each member singing a different song… or perhaps the same song with different words, lyrics, and tempo. Goblin children chase each other about, their leashes dangling from their necks as they screech and shout. Occasionally a leash catches on a bit of furniture or rubble, bringing the wearer crashing to the ground while their companions laugh uproariously.

From atop the throne a voice rings out — King Zusgut's! — clear as a bell. He pronounces his ah's' as in "father", his eh's' as in "met", his ee's as in "meet", his oh's as in "home", and his oo's' - as in "blue". Of course, the r's are trilled. His voice is deep and beautiful — if in a goblinesque way.

Oho! What’s this? Hmmm? Another group looking to throw their hats into the ring, as it were? Probably the Pathfinders I was expecting.

There is an incredulous gasp from a group of humans you had not noticed before. They seem to be malingering Stage Left. They wear piecemeal armor and have sheathed weapons. The goblin turns and addresses the interruption: Now, now. I never said anything about exclusive rights, did I? Hah! All the goblins in the room laugh. Something disgusting flies through the air. A chair is lit afire.

He turns back to you. So, Pathfinders. I’m sure you’ve heard about our trouble with the… drums in the orchestra pit begin rolling…

Beast in the Basement!!

Overhead, a symphony drum booms, punctuating the King's words.

I'm sure you wish to have the glory of slaying such an epic beast, and save a kingdom but kings must decide… hmmm. What is it your organization is willing to do for my kingdom, again? Why should I let you help us instead of these fine folks? He gestures to the gesturing to the warriors.

This is your chance to butter up the king, who — like any indie theater owner — appreciates art, volunteer work, money, and flattery! In fact, most of you know that Artistry (a Performance check), Bribery (20 SP), Flattery (Diplomacy), or Time (work study in the form of sacrificing 4 days of downtime) can help convince the King that you are worthy. Of course, you can also sell me on another skill if you like; please be creative. Magic can even be used with permission from the King, which he will grant if you ask nicely.

Several of you know that Zusgut has already made up his mind to favor the Pathfinder Society… but it wouldn't do any harm to strengthen your relationship by buttering him up, now would it?

Please tell me how your character pitches the Pathfinder Society's worth to Zusgut. You should codify your roleplay with a skill check — the exception is that if you donate downtime, you do not need to make a skill check.

Envoy's Alliance

820-2001 | "She / Her" | ♫ NG Female Gnome (Fey-Touched) Barrister Bard 8 ♫ | HP 65/88 | AC 23 | F +13 R +15 W +14 | Perc +13 | 35 Speed | Focus 2/2 | Spells 1st 3/3 Spell 2nd 2/3 3rd 3/3 4th 0/3 (DC 25) | Hero Points 0/3 | Campaign Coin 1/1 Active Conditions: Resist Fire 5 & Negative 1; Resist Physical 2; Concealment
Ogren Bound wrote:
Ogren gets a bit of a blank look on his face as Shwruk drones on some, before noticing the doggo. With a polite, "Thank-you for letting me offer for the club but I don't need a club, though I do like chairs and the chair leg." As soon as he can extract himself from the woman he bounds over to the dog. "Can I pet him? Can I pet him... uh, right, pleeeaaaase?"

"Of course you can pet Bailiff! He's the best dog!"

Envoy's Alliance

4 people marked this as a favorite.
820-2001 | "She / Her" | ♫ NG Female Gnome (Fey-Touched) Barrister Bard 8 ♫ | HP 65/88 | AC 23 | F +13 R +15 W +14 | Perc +13 | 35 Speed | Focus 2/2 | Spells 1st 3/3 Spell 2nd 2/3 3rd 3/3 4th 0/3 (DC 25) | Hero Points 0/3 | Campaign Coin 1/1 Active Conditions: Resist Fire 5 & Negative 1; Resist Physical 2; Concealment

Pip is much taken with the decaying beauty of the theater, the goblin children running everywhere, and King Zusgut's trilling voice. Surely this goblin king will appreciate a bit of theater.

She smiles and bows. "Oh noble King, goblin court, and our very tall competitors, let me introduce my comrades, so they can show you their expertise."

Performance (Oratory): 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (17) + 9 = 26

"We are the Pathfinders, we're here to fight the beast
We are the Pathfinders, have you seen our press release?
Here's Schwurk of the merchant trade, her wares arrayed
Her chair leg pitch you will not evade
We greet your court in its theater fort
We explore, cooperate, report!

We are the Pathfinders, with investigator Gurmire
We are the Pathfinders, and he knows all about fire,
Explosions and grenades, arsonist charades
The best bombs are home-made
Criminals fall short, their schemes abort
We explore, cooperate, report!

We are the Pathfinders, with Ogren and Lirabelle
We are the Pathfinders, we think they’re rather swell
They’re a holy brigade, our very own crusade
Meeting toothy danger unafraid
Our fearsome escort, the beast they’ll sort
We explore, cooperate, report!

We are the Pathfinders, here’s Packet Spoonshine
We are the Pathfinders, he’s an investigator by design
Tracking renegades, while the facts are weighed
No snack by him will ever be mislaid
He’s skill support of great import
We explore, cooperate, report!

We are the Pathfinders, and I’m barrister Pip
We are the Pathfinders, and here’s my legal scrip
I have the laws assayed, my words persuade
You’ll find my strategies are well-played
Don’t sell us short, I know my torts
We explore, cooperate, report!

We are the Pathfinders, as everybody knows
We are the Pathfinders, here to aid the Crookedtoes
Far from home we've strayed, so fierce of blade
I guess you can say we have it made:
Good at sports, clever with retorts
We explore, cooperate, report!”

Pip bows, and gestures to her comrades, giving them the chance to show off if they would like to do so.

Envoy's Alliance

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Male goblin alchemist 4 | 25’ | HP: 38/38 | AC: 21 | F: +8 R: +11 W: +6; Resist Fire 2 Cold 1 Electric 1 | Reagents 3/8 | Hero Points: 1| Exploration: Scouting | Status:

Boons and Training:

Envoy’s Alliance
Promotional Vestments
Society Connections Job Roll of Level 3.
Touched by the Storm, Resist Electricity 1

Pathfinder Training:
Lesser Healing Potion
Feather Token (Ladder)

Seeing the Theater brings tears to Gurmire’s eyes, and it probably it’s just the smoke. “This is a wonderful place!” He smiles at the running children and claps at the King’s performance.

He waits patiently for Pip to finish before stepping up.

Perform T: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (1) + 6 = 7 Goodbye hero point, I hardly knew you!
Perform T, Vestments: 1d20 + 6 + 1 ⇒ (14) + 6 + 1 = 21

He attempts to clear his throat, only to have a hacking, coughing fit. Holding up his hand to indicated the others should wait, he continues coughing for about a minute before he recovers.

Once recovered, he tries to start again.

Wonderful King Zusgut, you should pick us because we are right-sized and they” gesturing to the longshanks humans off to the side “are too big. The Pathfinder Society allows all sorts of people in, and they are smart enough to have sent a right-sized group to serve you.

Then in a happy, upbeat voice he starts singing.

I do believe in you
And I know you believe in me
Oh yeah
Oh yeah
But now we realize
Beast’s not all that it's supposed to be
Oh yeah
Oh yeah

And knowing that you would have wanted it this way
I do believe I'm feelin' stronger every day

I know we really tried
Together we make a beast be fried!

Oh yeah
Oh yeah
So now the time has come
For both of us to have some fun
Oh yeah
Oh yeah

Knowing that you would have wanted it this way
I do believe I'm feelin' stronger every day
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah

After what you said to me
Ooh baby now
I can make it easily
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I know that we both agree
The best thing to happen to you
Is the best thing that happened to me
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Feelin' stronger every day
Feelin' stronger every day
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)
Feelin' stronger every day
(You know I'm alright now)

Chicago, Feeling stronger every day

He then gives a bow and steps to the side for the next person.

Radiant Oath

CG female halfling (twilight halfling) liberator 2 | HP 28/28 | AC 19 (21 with shield) | F +7 R +7 W +7 | Perc +5 | Stealth +3 | Speed:25 ft | Active Conditions: ---

"Oh, what a lovely job you've done with this playhouse! Shelyn would smile upon the way you've saved this place of art. Most kings have done far less good."

Diplomacy: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (14) + 4 = 18

Horizon Hunters

2 people marked this as a favorite.
F Goblin (irongut) Bard (polymath)/1

Shwurk fluffs her shirt and takes a deep breath before stepping forward.

"Hey great king! How's it goings? Shwurk is here to tell you all about da great new opportunities of merch and dice!" She pulls out the club she showed her Pathfinder allies. "See dis! Pretty cool club, yeah? You'll never see anything like this anywheres. One of kinds. And it's a gift for you if you sign up for Shwurk's sub-scrip-shun plan! One time deals, only you for you, mister king. You get a free one of kinds creation of a great art-y-san using the patented greebling process for the low price of 5 golds a month. Everyone will be so jelly of how cool you are for having something that the other big fancy people don't!"

I use the voice I use for my cat for her, so she sounds kinda like a small child

Performance: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (16) + 7 = 23


2 people marked this as a favorite.
SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

The goblins start singing along with Pip and then Gurmire. Flaming chair-legs fly through the air, and from the balcony, a gong crashes. Zusgut grins widely and stands.

Noble! Chivalrous! THEATRICAL! The Pathfinders truly know how to treat a king! He takes the club in hand, patting it like a golden scepter. And I accept your gifts with grace. Thank you!

He turns to Orgren and Packet. And what precious gifts — be they words or songs or greeble'd clubs — do your companions bring the Crookedtoes?

Vigilant Seal

CG Halfling Rogue/Sorcerer | HP 42/42 | AC 21 | Class DC 20 | F: +7, R: +12, W: +9 | Perc: +9 | Speed 30ft | Ranged: Sling +10 1d6+4, Melee: +1 Striking Short Sword +11 2d6 +4 Active conditions: None

Packet marvels at the performances, and at the sheer energy of his goblin companions, but he is not one for performing himself, so he puffs thoughtfully on his pipe for a moment.

”I’m not doing anything for the next few days, so I can offer you my time. Surely you could use an extra hand around here. And I’m sure there’s a lot I could learn as well.”


SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

A work-study it is. We've had such a hard time finding volunteers. Something about no… hmmm… what did they call it? He taps the scepter. "Hazard pay" — that was the term. There were disagreements about the amount of fire, or the being on fire, and the blood and — well, this city's strange traditions are neither here nor there when you are within the Crookedtoes' realm! We use PRACTICAL EFFECTS! The goblins cheer and scream at the thought of real fire and blood on stage!

Packet will lose 4 days of downtime to join the goblin workforce, building sets and sewing costumes and the like. He can use this time to learn about the tribe. PCs who want to do this for fun/rp reasons can do so as well.

And what word does this neat-looking goblin offer, in his well-maintained armor, be-pattern'd with strange runes? He looks at Orgren.

Horizon Hunters

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F Goblin (irongut) Bard (polymath)/1

Shwurk will offer to help out the goblin workforce, teaching them the patented greebling process (tm) as long as they make sure to use the name and spread word of who invented it!

Vigilant Seal

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NG Male Goblin (Unbreakable) Champion 3 | HP 46/46; Shield 20/20 | AC: 21 (23 w/ shield) | F +9 R +8 (+6 vs. non-damaging saves) W +7 | Perc +5 | 20 feet | Hero: 1, Focus: 1/1 | Class DC 19 | Active Conditions: none
Pip Hip Hooray wrote:
"Of course you can pet Bailiff! He's the best dog!"

Eyes wide, Ogren thanks the woman. "Thank-you!" before he bounces over and scratches Bailiff's ears and chin and back and left flank and right flank and ... It takes a few good minutes before the goblin can be hauled off the dog.

___________

Ogren ogles the theatre in complete awe. "It's so big! I love the design touches!" He helps one of the kids when they get caught on something and wistfully things about joining the kids in running around.

As they approach the king he starts vibrating again in pure excitement. But like a good little goblin, like Meemaw and Deepa taught him, he waits for his turn, to speak after the ruler had spoken to him. When his time comes he springs forward, half smiles half worried. "I am Ogren Bound... I want to... I was... I was told my parents were once part of the Crookedtoes Tribe but 'gots losts.' Does Shirgen or Osherd Bound ring bells? They were my mother and father...." He spends a very long pause worried about the possible response before he switches topics and forces a smile to his face. "But I come offering... uh... my time! I'm great at helping keep people safe and I just visited a place where I got lit on fire! I would love to help. Also give some coins to my peoples!" With this he pulls out a few silver coins, and pauses not sure what to do with them.

I really was truly not expecting these people to be part of the Crookedtoes.


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SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

All the goblins fall silent! The king pauses, then stands, slowly clapping. Dust billows out into the air around him with each clap from the old crimson robes he's wearing — they were clearly pilfered from some forgotten costume closet.

The prodigal tribesperson returns! What a tale! We will have to look up Shirgen and Osherd — perhaps Velkik remembers. He gestures Stage Right, and a spotlight from the mezzanine shines down on an elderly goblin. She looks bind and is adorned with the symbols of Sarenrae. (Gurmire certainly notices this).

She croaks: By the dawnflower… I may remember… but Zusgut cuts her off. Yes, it may be so! But the prodigal hero must return to prove his worth, and save his people! This would, after all, be a better story would it not?

Zusgut slowly makes his way to Ogren and warmly clasps his hand. The goblins gather around and cheer! Ogren is left bewildered as the king adjusts his paint-chipped crown and then makes his way back to the throne on the stage.

Minutes later he notices that Zusgut has also taken the money. It seems that even the ties of goblin tribes cannot supersede the importance of funding community theater…

6/6/ successes!

I leave it to Orgren whether Velkik can confirm his Crookedtoes lineage or not, we can resolve that at the end but it's a cool twist!


SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

Zusgut sits down again. Revelations of long-lost tribespeople… strangers in a strange land receiving gifts and compliments from the city's most powerful factions… He taps his finger on the old crown; a fleck of gold paint falls off. How to decide on who to send below, to save us from that horrible beast? How to decide who to grant permission to explore my demesne? He gestures to the humans standing to the side. Shall it be these guests, who look extremely mean and sulky? I'm sure they're a powerful lot… he gestures to you. Or the Pathfinders, who bring gifts and goodwill? Hmmmm……

The goblin leader sits thinking for a while, then springs to his feet and points a finger high in the sky. (several of you know this is all a show and he's already made up his mind. But a show he will have!)

I know! he shouts. We should have a contest to see who goes! You can read lines from my play. The surrounding goblins cheer. He squints at the mercenaries. Since you got here first, you can go first! The show starts in two minutes! Whoever can do a better stage reading of my epic will have won the day!

At this news, another cheer goes up from the Crookedtoes goblins and they begin to crowd toward the stage, yammering and shouting.

You are pushed into a green room behind the stage and given pieces of a script — some of it seems to be burnt or even chewed upon.

The play is on the first two slides with the content in text format. When I GM'd this live I made props: Cover of the play and interior. Unfortunately, we don't get those in the digital medium.

There on the table are some costumes — a bent and tarnished crown (it's not nearly as "nice" as Zusgut's), a moth-eaten tuxedo and slide whistle, a rabbit suit and wooden great axe, a green bycocket hat and a toy crossbow, two matching pink ribbons, and a soggy paper maché suit of what might have once been a full plate mail costume.

There are 7 parts, and 6 of you. Whoever plays Siathorn and her pet poodle Mitzli (who's not a dog! Ferocious wolf!) can play both parts.

King Zusgut will wear the crown.
Ulthun will wear the plate mail.
Grenek will wear the rabbit costume.
Siathorn and Mitzli wear matching ribbons.
Crimsi will wear the bycocket hat and crossbow.
Pizzaz will wear the tuxedo and use the slide whistle.

You hear the mercenaries outside… there's a scream and the smell of burning hair and a chorus of "boo's"… it seems like this is a tough crowd.

Please choose a single part (Mitzli and Siathorn being the exception). We will be playing this scene out in the play-by-post, so your character will be asked to "read" their lines, giving a performance for the goblins. You can add any roleplay or flavor that seems fun or appropriate for how your PC would react to this situation.

You will need to make a perform check after your performance to see how good of an actor you are! I will be generous with circumstance bonuses for good roleplay.

Radiant Oath

CG female halfling (twilight halfling) liberator 2 | HP 28/28 | AC 19 (21 with shield) | F +7 R +7 W +7 | Perc +5 | Stealth +3 | Speed:25 ft | Active Conditions: ---

Lirabelle starts frantically searching through her knitting for extra bits to go with the costumes.

I'd prefer others who haven't experienced this yet to choose first! Lirabelle can play whoever is left.

Envoy's Alliance

Male goblin alchemist 4 | 25’ | HP: 38/38 | AC: 21 | F: +8 R: +11 W: +6; Resist Fire 2 Cold 1 Electric 1 | Reagents 3/8 | Hero Points: 1| Exploration: Scouting | Status:

Looking over the costumes, Gurmire frets “So many choices! They all look like fun! I think I would like the part that uses the rabbit ears or the one with the whistle!
Grenik or Pizzaz

He is not even reading the script, just picking based on costume.

Then he turns to Orgren and says “Since they are your tribe, we should give you first pick!

Horizon Hunters

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F Goblin (irongut) Bard (polymath)/1

Shwurk shakes her head at the plate. "Not even properly greebled. Dis-gwace-ful."

The rabbit costume just gets a sigh. "Bunnies hop too much. It's not prof-essional. Gots to be prof-essional if you wants to sell stuffs."

She waves off the ribbons. "Too girly! Shwurk isn't a little girl. She's a grown goblin!"

She nods approvingly at the hat and crossbow. "Hats are very prof-essional."

She gasps as she sees the tuxedo. "THAT'S IT. That's the most prof-essional." The whistle gives her pause before she nods her head with great gravitas. "I see. It's for doing jingles. Jingles are for selling stuffs, so jingles are prof-essional."

Shwurk would like Pizzaz but would also be happy with Crimsi

Vigilant Seal

CG Halfling Rogue/Sorcerer | HP 42/42 | AC 21 | Class DC 20 | F: +7, R: +12, W: +9 | Perc: +9 | Speed 30ft | Ranged: Sling +10 1d6+4, Melee: +1 Striking Short Sword +11 2d6 +4 Active conditions: None

Packet takes the crown.

"It'd be an honor to play the king. I think."


SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

King Zusgut will be played by Packet
Ulthun will be played by ?
Grenek will be played by Gurmire
Siathorn & Mitzli will be played by Pip and Bailiff
Crimsi will be played by ?
Pizzaz will be played by Shwurk

Lirabelle is fine taking what's left — she looks to Orgren to see if he'll take the armor (the human Ulthun's costume) or the crossbow (the goblin Crimsi's costume).

Vigilant Seal

NG Male Goblin (Unbreakable) Champion 3 | HP 46/46; Shield 20/20 | AC: 21 (23 w/ shield) | F +9 R +8 (+6 vs. non-damaging saves) W +7 | Perc +5 | 20 feet | Hero: 1, Focus: 1/1 | Class DC 19 | Active Conditions: none

Ogren looks over the options left on the table and picks up the armor. "I have been wanting to get my own set of plate mail for ever! Deepa says 'Ev'n da ad'pted son o'da best sm'thhin Kr'ggod'n hasta pay fer his plate.'" The little goblin then dons the medium sized plate the bottom edge of breast plate only an inch or two from the ground. He has to waddle in an almost penguin esque manner and every time he moves his head the face plate of the headpiece threatens to close on his nose. He gives a nod and small muffled yelp of pain as the armor closes. In a metallic raining voice he calls out "Ready!..ooooh my nose. "

Envoy's Alliance

Male goblin alchemist 4 | 25’ | HP: 38/38 | AC: 21 | F: +8 R: +11 W: +6; Resist Fire 2 Cold 1 Electric 1 | Reagents 3/8 | Hero Points: 1| Exploration: Scouting | Status:

We should try to make you taller, Ogren!

Having said that, Gurmire looks around for some wooden blocks of about the right size. He tries them if needed, then takes some of the ratty cloth around and makes straps. He then presents Ogren with the make-shift block-sandals. “There, these should make you taller than us!
Crafting make-shift block sandals: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (6) + 11 = 17

Then he decides “I better read the script. We need to do much better than those people!” pointing at the group of humans.

After a few minutes, he calls out “Ready!

Radiant Oath

CG female halfling (twilight halfling) liberator 2 | HP 28/28 | AC 19 (21 with shield) | F +7 R +7 W +7 | Perc +5 | Stealth +3 | Speed:25 ft | Active Conditions: ---

Lirabelle puts on the bycocket hat and picks up the crossbow. "It's nice, but a little too frightening for the kiddies. It just needs a little...let me find it...yes!" She pulls out a bright blue knit crossbow covering and attaches it to the crossbow.

Envoy's Alliance

Male goblin alchemist 4 | 25’ | HP: 38/38 | AC: 21 | F: +8 R: +11 W: +6; Resist Fire 2 Cold 1 Electric 1 | Reagents 3/8 | Hero Points: 1| Exploration: Scouting | Status:

Gurmire looks at Lirabelle with confusion. She must not have spent any time with goblin children!

Goblin children are expected to play with dangerous things. That is how they learn what hurts and ways to avoid that.


SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

You hear the mercenaries continue their performance… the voices are wooden and unenthusiastic, and some of them are trying to deal with being pelted by trash (some of it on fire) as they perform.

Now that you're ready, there's seemingly nothing to do but wait… except, there is one more thing you can do. Why practice reading your lines when you can undermine the opposition's performance?

If this is the kind of chaotic subterfuge you would like to partake in, you may make a bluff check to further disrupt your enemies' show! Please accompany that check with a description of what you're doing.

Each successful disruption will increase the difficulty of disrupting the performance again — remember, the goblin audience has a very short attention span! If you want to disrupt the performance, let me know how you do so and accompany it with a bluff check (or sell me on something)!


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Breed: Westgate Windhound or "Westie" from Absalom. Pip's riding dog.

Bailiff comes at Pip's call!

"WOOOF! WOOOF!"

I don't know what's going on, but I am getting petted and Pip is putting ribbons on me! It's because I'm such a good dog!

Horizon Hunters

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F Goblin (irongut) Bard (polymath)/1

"Sell" you on something, you say? :D

Shwurk remembers a business person giving a talk about "disruption" in regards to business, and how it's really good and you should definitely do that, so she sets about "disrupting" the audience.

"Don't listen to these boring peoples. You're gonna hear a better version soon anyways. Now is your opportunity to get on the basement floor of a new opportunitys for growths. So pivot--" There had also been mentioning of "pivoting" during that talk. "--your eyes away from the stage and munch your eyes on the newest merch and dice!"

Performance: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (8) + 7 = 15


SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

Shwurk barely succeeds but manages to draw some eyes to a set of "greebled" (loaded?) dice.

Envoy's Alliance

Male goblin alchemist 4 | 25’ | HP: 38/38 | AC: 21 | F: +8 R: +11 W: +6; Resist Fire 2 Cold 1 Electric 1 | Reagents 3/8 | Hero Points: 1| Exploration: Scouting | Status:

Gurmire wants to know more about the competition. He watches with interest as they mangle their lines and dodge flaming bits of criticism.


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SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros
Gurmire wrote:
Gurmire wants to know more about the competition. He watches with interest as they mangle their lines and dodge flaming bits of criticism.

The mercenaries break character rather often… which only causes more flaming debris to be thrown their way, which causes them to break character again, which causes more flaming debris to be thrown…

Truly, it's a downward spiral of pain and embarrassment for the would-be troupe.

Nice work, Gerrod — thanks! Says a woman as she wrings tomato-paste out of her hair.

That's MY line, Fedor! Says a man before he slips on a banana peel.

Incoming, Tess! Shouts the other man as he watches flaming bagpipes soar through the air like an abyssal goose.

Gurmire also hears mutters to the effect of Olansa didn't pay us enough for this!

Envoy's Alliance

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820-2001 | "She / Her" | ♫ NG Female Gnome (Fey-Touched) Barrister Bard 8 ♫ | HP 65/88 | AC 23 | F +13 R +15 W +14 | Perc +13 | 35 Speed | Focus 2/2 | Spells 1st 3/3 Spell 2nd 2/3 3rd 3/3 4th 0/3 (DC 25) | Hero Points 0/3 | Campaign Coin 1/1 Active Conditions: Resist Fire 5 & Negative 1; Resist Physical 2; Concealment

As they mumble their lines, Pip creates a little disturbance of her own by providing 'acting lessons' to the beleaguered longshank troupe. She also sends Bailiff to 'help' them out by running through their performance and catching some of the raining vegetables while barking a lot.

Perform Oratory: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (20) + 9 = 29
My Deception Bonus is the same, but I see this more as a performance.

"Step lively through the muck,
Lively as the produce rains!
Pretend your performance doesn't suck
Er, maybe wait for that sauce to drain?

Step lively, ye longshanks, do
Lively, hold your heads up high
This is what you were born to...Ewww!
Who threw that rotten radish pie?

Step lively, they're throwing food
Lively! Duck! And be not afraid
The laughter's genuine if a bit crude!
Good ducking! Lively stepping! Well-played!"


Breed: Westgate Windhound or "Westie" from Absalom. Pip's riding dog.

"Wooof! Woooof!' Bailfiff madly chases the raining produce.

This is a fun game! I am such a good dog!

Vigilant Seal

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NG Male Goblin (Unbreakable) Champion 3 | HP 46/46; Shield 20/20 | AC: 21 (23 w/ shield) | F +9 R +8 (+6 vs. non-damaging saves) W +7 | Perc +5 | 20 feet | Hero: 1, Focus: 1/1 | Class DC 19 | Active Conditions: none
Gurmire wrote:

We should try to make you taller, Ogren!

Having said that, Gurmire looks around for some wooden blocks of about the right size. He tries them if needed, then takes some of the ratty cloth around and makes straps. He then presents Ogren with the make-shift block-sandals. “There, these should make you taller than us!

Ogren's eyes, or at least what little of them can be seen from behind the helmet face plate, light up at the mention of having something taller to stand on. He very slowly puts on the sandals, reaching the height of a tall halfling or maybe a particularly short dwarf. The giant shoes however make the penguin waddle of before even more wooden. The goblin then slowly, slowly tries to join his companions out front. The stairs and small twisting back stage spaces would be impossible. He instead tries to get down from the front steps, inadvertently entering the performing area of the humans ahead of them. He frowns for the first time in a long time as he sees all the rotted and Flaming produce and trash on stage and tries to find a path across the stage that doesn't risk him slipping and never getting up. "Excuse me. Coming through. Argh watch the potato peels. Sir can you step to the left a bit? Perfect that's the only clean spot stage left. Okay, and then of I go stage right some I should be able to make the far right stair case! Yes!"

Can I use athletics?: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (8) + 7 = 15


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SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

Pip's song not only trips up the mercenaries, but they accidentally start singing along. Zusgut himself picks costume jewelry (a huge green emerald, then a diamond) of the arm of his painted throne and chucks it at the offenders. This is no MUSICAL! This is THEATER! Do at least try!

Meanwhile, Orgren clomps around in his new block sandals, teetering above the goblins. Unfortunately, he is so polite and so adept at using his gift of athletics that he fails to distract his potential tribe members.

Perhaps if he stepped on some toes instead… Sorry Orgren, The DC goes up every time so a 15 is no longer good enough!

Vigilant Seal

CG Halfling Rogue/Sorcerer | HP 42/42 | AC 21 | Class DC 20 | F: +7, R: +12, W: +9 | Perc: +9 | Speed 30ft | Ranged: Sling +10 1d6+4, Melee: +1 Striking Short Sword +11 2d6 +4 Active conditions: None

Packet isn't sure which is more entertaining, the goblins' antics, or watching the mercenaries fail so spectacularly.

Vigilant Seal

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NG Male Goblin (Unbreakable) Champion 3 | HP 46/46; Shield 20/20 | AC: 21 (23 w/ shield) | F +9 R +8 (+6 vs. non-damaging saves) W +7 | Perc +5 | 20 feet | Hero: 1, Focus: 1/1 | Class DC 19 | Active Conditions: none
GM Doug H wrote:

Meanwhile, Orgren clomps around in his new block sandals, teetering above the goblins. Unfortunately, he is so polite and so adept at using his gift of athletics that he fails to distract his potential tribe members.

Perhaps if he stepped on some toes instead… Sorry Orgren, The DC goes up every time so a 15 is no longer good enough!

Ogren pulls up the face plate and gives a sigh of relief, he'd made it through the mess on the stage without making a mess of their performance in the process! He excitedly jitters at a few goblins gathered stage right, causing the armor to clang some in the process. "Did you see that? I made it across the stage without causing problems for anyone! I even avoided stepping on some toes! I was a good goblin!"

That is perfectly fine, in character that was his main goal anyways!


SoT (Semester 1 Year 3): Tactical Map, Handouts, Macros ⠀Sundered Song: Map & Handouts, Macros ⠀Pallid Peril: Map & Handouts, Macros

Soon, it's mercifully over for the bedraggled mercenaries. They slink off stage, heads down.

Two goblin stagehands, dressed in all black, wheel Zusgut's golden throne (with him on it) to center stage. A spotlight illuminates him and he holds up his hands for silence. And now, Crookedtoes, the PATHFINDERS! The goblins wheel the throne away and a couple more wheel in a damp scrim that was once painted with a pastoral field, but now it's marred by wide splotches of black mold.

From just off stage, the King intones from his throne:

ENTER ZUSGUT, CRIMSI, GRENEK, SIATHORN, MITZI (a wolf, not a dog), PIZAZZ, and ULTHUN (a human).

It looks like the show is about to begin! Please "act" out your lines in the order of the play. "Zusgut" is up.

Vigilant Seal

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CG Halfling Rogue/Sorcerer | HP 42/42 | AC 21 | Class DC 20 | F: +7, R: +12, W: +9 | Perc: +9 | Speed 30ft | Ranged: Sling +10 1d6+4, Melee: +1 Striking Short Sword +11 2d6 +4 Active conditions: None

Upon hearing ENTER ZUSGUT, Packet starts, and looks frantically for something to serve as a throne. He grabs a dirty bucket and mop off stage left, discards the filthy mop, throws the smelly water toward the burning bagpipe, and then sits himself atop the overturned bucket.

He clears his throat, and then in his deepest voice proclaims:

"I see the great heroes have returned! But who is this with you? Speak, brave knight."

Packet directs a sweeping gesture toward Ulthun.

Vigilant Seal

1 person marked this as a favorite.
NG Male Goblin (Unbreakable) Champion 3 | HP 46/46; Shield 20/20 | AC: 21 (23 w/ shield) | F +9 R +8 (+6 vs. non-damaging saves) W +7 | Perc +5 | 20 feet | Hero: 1, Focus: 1/1 | Class DC 19 | Active Conditions: none

Hearing his part called, Ogren initially isn't aware he was called. After a moments pause and seeing everyone else getting on the stage, Ogren gives a start and then starts the laborious process of walking. up. all. FIVE. steps.

Taking a moment to rest at the top, he realizes it's his turn to speak. He starts to move across the stage, clomping around the fruits, the dirty puddle of bucket water, and the flaming bagpipe. As he goes he tries to copy the deep rumbling brogue of a dwarven guard, but given his higher, squeaky voice it sounds... wrong. What his voice lacks in correctness though, it certainly makes up for in volume. "Oh miaghti 'ief of de gob'ins!"
He pauses in front of the 'throne' of Packet, clearly having forgotten his lines for a second. "Uhhh... 'ose 'it'n'skill are... un-syrup-assed,"
He starts to gesture to himself before trying to dip into a bow, and very nearly falling off the wooden blocks. 'am ca'ed Uldun, Wotcher-'ord of, woah, of 'astwall!"
The goblin takes a moment to regain his balance before continuing, "Awas, dat waand 'as been oberrun by undead'n'is no more!" As he finishes his lines, Ogren gives a big sigh, and then slowly leans over asking the goblin next to him, What's un-syrup-assed mean, anyways?"

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