The Jade Goblin Adventure Path

Game Master Loup Blanc

This odd mixy mix. Zurk wonder how many lives of Aka he munch 'fore magic pain slingers come to get him in the night.

Ooh! Da songies be starting! That Zurk's favorite part of honorary gob gob life. Sang louder, gob gob!

"Why you stop Sanging? Twas good song! Cept rock part, thats Gnoblar."
He then breaks into a song of his own :)
"Happy, Flappy sat onna wall.
Happy, Flappy higher'n you all!
Alla Gutwards toads an alla Gutwards men
Didnt bring Flappy down again!
Flappy da besht!"
He then jumps up onto Gnoblars head and starts up another one

Feast until you are filled
Upon the corpses goblins killed!
Search the pockets
Steal their stuff!
Goblins never get enough!

When the humies start to fight
Stick the goodies in a sack!
We disappear into the night
Silly humies, we'll be back!

Credit goes to Ross Byers for the song :)

Just a heads up: I'm going to be away for the Canada Day long weekend and then some. I might be online early tommorrow morning, but after that, I'll be effectively unavailable until Wednesday. I should be near some internet/wifi at times so I will keep my eye on the thread. If I'm chosen and there is posting or conversation required, I will do my utmost to get something up (although it could be a little tardy).

Anderlorn's submission and continuing to refine it.

Nutk Bonethief

RECRUITMENT IS NOW CLOSED!

Thank you all for your interest, and rest assured that even if you aren't accepted this time, you're on the list for the next game of this that I run!

SUBMISSIONS

Kor--Spug Deatheater, Goblin Cleric (Chief's Left Hand)
Havocprince--Um Horsecutta, Goblin Monk [Zen Archer] (Scribbleface's Assistant)
Dorian--Tindertwig, Goblin Ranger [Trapper] (Sandpoint Skulk)
Sersi--Ziki Fireburner, Goblin Magus (Scribbleface's Assistant)
Krash--Zoog, Goblin Alchemist (Sandpoint Skulk)
Forthepie--Gmerok Stoneshredder, Goblin Bard (Student of Vorka)
Dark Netwerk--Zord Manslicer, Goblin Inquisitor (Goblin Warrior)
Darkfire--Garm Rantblade, Goblin Cavalier (Goblin Warrior?)
kdtompos--Gniffles, Goblin Witch (Student of Vorka)
Proioxis--Marrowdown, Goblin Barbarian (Goblin Warrior)
Tie My Shoelace--Grunty, Hobgoblin Barbarian (Chippers' Bud)
ShadowyFox--Zurk Gutripper, Bugbear Antipaladin (Bigbad Bugbear)
Alex Mack--Sznek, Goblin Barbarian (Chippers' Bud)
Gobo Horde--Flappy, Goblin Druid (No Campaign Trait)
Irnk--Aka, Goblin Eldritch Godling (Chippers' Bud)
Anderlorn--Nutk Bonethief, Gobin Gunslinger (Goblin Warrior)

Breakdown of Campaign Trait Choices
Bigbad Bugbear: 1
Chief's Left Hand: 1
Chippers' Bud: 3
Goblin Warrior: 3/4
Sandpoint Skulk: 2
Scribbleface's Assistant: 2
Student of Vorka: 2

Zurk ready for killin!

Oops! I forgot the campaign trait. I figure Sandpoint Skulk or Student of Vorka would both be marginally helpful, with Skulk easier to work into my backstory but Student being a bit more beneficial. Sign me up for either of those!

Gmerok fidgets nervously.

"This goblin is not good at waiting!!

"Nutk iz readyz to shootz them with leadz and puss."

"Nahnah Zurk, Marrowdown be the one who be killin'! No more singiesongs, now be waiting time! Marrowdown bites any singsongers!"

Tindertwig looks around and shuffles off into a corner, speaking to Dirtbag Hmmm...seems to be crowded here in place. We need to ....maybe thin the herd, huh Dirtbag...yes...maybe wees do Dirtbag and then we eats and come for another one. Dirtbag, who gets arrow first?

Nutk pulls his goblinfied hand cannon (medium size pistol) out and aims at Tindertwig, "Makez me dayz maggotz!". Then one of his boils pops and sends puss to all who are near.

"Fine, fine, fine. Zurk gonna salt the bugs, eat 'em, maybe pickle 'em. Waitin' no fun for Zurk."

Zoog begins throwing bombs around willy nilly. "Zoog make boom! Zoog make boom!" In his head, where he hides his true intelligence, he thinks, I am truly ecstatic at the prospect of campaigning with these other goblinoids. It shall be a wonderful way to run experiments for some new hypotheses I have about my alchemy.

"RRAAAAHHHHHGRRrrrrrGAHHHH!" Smashes tree with giant hammer "hurgurhurhurgr"

Um stamps his foot hard on the branch he has been hiding on for the last hour"OOOOOH SHUTS UP YOU ANNOYING GOBS, BEFORE I COMES DOWN THERE AND WAPS YOUR HEADS. Stupid gobs and their fighting." Um stamps one more time and the branch gives way. He screams the whole way down.

Edit: LOL Grunty ninja'd me with an awesomely appropriate post.

"Oooh ohhhh, Grunty excited too, want to go see the world with rest of little goblins. Other goblins not stand in front of tree, Grunty break trees when excited."

...

"See, Moxxie told you little Um, You not listen You get smashed."

"This real good! Me's tha' only Left Hand o' tha' Cheev! Just tha' way it should be! May Venkelvore bless tha' Cheev and all'a yous'. Lets us's prove to tha' Cheev that we all worthy! Lets kill many stuffs and bring back lots of trophies! Haaarrrroooo!!!!!"

"Ziki set fire to tree if Horsecutta no shut up. Ziki make best fires in village."
Upon seeing the goblin crash to the ground:
"Or Ziki watch that happen. Ziki gnaw your leg now.

"Everyone gather 'round! Me have import'nt message from Cheev! Hurry, hurry!" Calls out the Chief's Left Hand.

Once most have gathered around Spug, he quickly spins around, bends over slightly and clenches tightly, releasing the most vilest of smells accompanied with a grotesque spluttering sound. Spug spins around again to face his audience with a large grin on his face.

"That is all. Back to work!" Spug looks most proud of himself and appears almost oblivious to the steady, warm drips of creamy brownness slowly streaking down his legs.

Zurk growls at the vileness! "Evil little gob gob gonna get Zurk's fist! Then Zurk feed him to da Hungry Lady!"

Zoog sneaks up behind Spug and dumps a bucket of swamp water on his. "Stupid stinky gob! You no stink on Zoog!"

Stealth: 1d20 + 17 ⇒ (20) + 17 = 37

Um finally gets himself together after his fall. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA STUPID ZOOG GET STINK SPLOOSHED..... ooh a stink bug" Um bends over to grab a stink bug off a nearby leaf and adds it to his pack.

Zoog kicks stupid Um in the bum as he bends over to pick up stupid stink but, and runs off laughing maniacally. The things I do to entertain these foolish goblinoids... His smart side thinks.

Nutk walks behind a tree and into the shadows, then he waits for Zoog to run by to steal the stink bug out of his hand as one of his pimple and boils pop. Nutk is hunGRY!

stealth: 1d20 + 13 ⇒ (17) + 13 = 30
Sleight of Hand: 1d20 + 9 ⇒ (6) + 9 = 15

Crouching low in a corner still, Tindertwig watches with a fascinated gleefulness spreading on his over-sized eared head.

You see, Dirtbag, it will be easy to sneak around these wrenches. I think we follow and pick dem off one by...three. Yes we will eats and has lots of new trophy I think it, Dirtbag

stealth: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (4) + 16 = 20
Perception: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (19) + 11 = 30

Tindertwig watches while licking his toad.

Which ones you wanted Dirtbag?

Gmerok says to Tindertwig, "Silly Longshanks...err Ever powerful voice in sky said no eat other goblins. Prolly does not know that goblins eat other goblins, its our way. But his party, his rules, I sup'ose."

"Flappy try hard keep everygobo in sight, that way nogobo sneak up ona him!"

before Nutk has a chance to steal the stinkbug Flappy shouts out "Quick! Gnobler! Grabs dat gobo wit da stinkbug!!!"
Gnobler looks blankly and stupidly at the gobo running past then all of a sudden a tongue lashes out and wraps around Zoogs head!
Attack Roll: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 3 = 10, the tongue deals no damage but grapples you.
Grapple Check: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (6) + 7 = 13

I think I'm going to bow out of this game. I'm already running a game and playing in one. I don't want to overextend myself. Thanks and all the best for this game.

Realizing that his trusted toad missed, he yells out to everygobo and hoping to incite a mob to chase after Zoog.
"Quick everygobo! He has da stinkbug!! Gets him!!"

Dang Garm, that sucks, I was kinda hoping to see a goblin Cavalier in action.

Marrowdown enters the fray! He slaps and pushes the other goblins, and tries unsuccessfully to push big Grunty to the ground before giving up. "You lotta shut up! Make too much noises, bad gobs! Yous better be quiet, otherwise lotsa bad stuff gonna happen!"

As Zoog runs past Marrowdown, he leaps ontop of the alchemist and struggles to bring him down. Marrowdown succeeds! He grabs Zoog by the ankles and drags him back to the group!
Grapple: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (17) + 4 = 21

Nutk missing his first attempt to grab Horsecutta's stinkbug from Zoog, he jumps on Zoog's back to grab the stinkbug, "YaIEEEZ". He jumps on but is unable to hold on and slips off.

Grapple: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (12) + 1 = 13

This is turning into a right riot!

Leaping up onto Gnobler and motioning towards Um he whispers into Gnoblers ear
"Gets that one, hez tha real one wit da stinkbug!

Gnobler leaps into the air and lands next to Um with a resounding crash, an unfortunate NPC gobo underneath him, then his tongue lashes out again!

Looks like I forgot the rest :P
grapple: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (4) + 7 = 11
Damn tongue is broken :P

Gmerok begins a bardic performance Fascinate by singing an old Goblin song.

Everyone must save DC14

Will: 1d20 ⇒ 20

"I said... NO SINGIESONGS!"
Marrowdown leaps at Gmerok and latches onto his head with his mouth.
Attack: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (13) + 7 = 20

I'd roll damage but then I feel like it'd turn into an all-out fight!

There is always non-lethal Marrow ... lol

Will: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (9) + 1 = 10

Nutk was about to jump on Zoog's back again but then all of sudden sits down and watches Gmerok's performance until it stops suddenly by Marrow's assault. Then he wakes up, shakes his head, and looks around.

Perception: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (11) + 4 = 15

Noticing Gmerok's attempt to fascinate him and Marrow's assault, Getz Gmerok, he singiesonz!!!! ... Nutk attacks Gmerok, "YiEEEEE"

Grapple: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 1 = 21

Nutk attaches himself to Gmerok's leg and is about to bite his leg but not until one of Nutk's big nasty boils pops puss all over Gmerok and Marrow.

I didnt think you could use fascinate in the midst of a brawl...
"Any obvious threat, such as someone drawing a weapon, casting a spell, or aiming a weapon at the target, automatically breaks the effect."
but I will roll anyways ^-^
Also, just deal non-lethal damage :) that way some of us might get knocked out but still alive 8D

Will Save: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (17) + 6 = 23
Gnoblers will save: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (6) - 1 = 5

Well Gnobler likes the song :P

When Marrowdown says no singiesongs, he means no singiesongs (Didn't think of that! Next time I'll roll nonlethal, hah. Thanks guys).

We are having a brawl in a recruitment thread, so I figured all bets were off.

Punching Marrowdown: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (13) + 1 = 14

Marrow, your attack should be +7 btw...

Yep, fixed it a minute ago. And that's what I figured too, but we aren't allowed to eat the others so I assume that also writes off killing them.

Ziruk wades in, heading straight for Spug, the problem gobgob! "Time to squish the Spug-bug!" He swings a fist..

Swing!: 1d20 + 1 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 1 + 5 = 11

"OoOohhh" Grunty gets all excited with everyone fighting around him. He starts wading through everyone and punching all the little goblinies

Punch Marrowdown: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (7) + 7 = 14

Punch Gmerok: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (12) + 7 = 19
Nonleathal punch to the face: 1d3 + 6 ⇒ (2) + 6 = 8

Punch Flappy: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (16) + 7 = 23
Nonleathal punch to the face: 1d3 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9

Punch Nutk: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (11) + 7 = 18
Nonleathal punch to the face: 1d3 + 6 ⇒ (1) + 6 = 7

Punch Zoog: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (16) + 7 = 23
Nonleathal punch to the face: 1d3 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9

Punch Tindertwig: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (11) + 7 = 18
Nonleathal punch to the face: 1d3 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9

Punch Spug: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (13) + 7 = 20
Nonleathal punch to the face: 1d3 + 6 ⇒ (3) + 6 = 9

Punch Um: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (3) + 7 = 10

Punch Ziki: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (2) + 7 = 9

As Grunty passes by Gmerok takes an attack of opportunity.

Kick Grunty: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 1 = 21
Confirm monster kick of doom: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (20) + 1 = 21
Grunty flies across the room into a heap, nonlethal of course.

Double 20 o.O

"Ooof!" Flappy grunts as he takes a good whallop to the nose.
"Gets him! He hits me! Oi! O!i Oi!" he smacks Gnobler hard, snapping him out of the daze he was in. Slightly confused Gnobler grabs Gmerok instead!
Grapple: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (1) + 7 = 8
"Not him yous stuupid! Oh, neverwhatever tha, hes goin flying!" Watching as the big brute goes flying away into a tree.
That tongue... Its broken I tell you!

Um laughs at poor grunty as he takes his own swing back(attack of opportunity)
1d20 ⇒ 1
Um ends up in a heap on the ground having knocked himself out?

"Zurk's gonna crush bones and smash headsets of stupid gobgobs if dey don't shut up!" the bugbear howls out, tired of all the noise.

Demoralize: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (4) + 11 = 15

Zoog angrily punches Grunty as he passes...

AttackOfOppurtunity: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (7) + 1 = 8

... and totally misses, hitting the nearest gobo instead. "Take that stupid Grunty!"