"Stand still Poog. Not wanna hit you face this time!" Reta says as she swings her club at the cat on Poog.
for
Clubby-Chuff steps and takes another big swing at the felonious feline on Poog's mug...
"Pop tha puzzy!"
Reta busy not hitting her friend, so misses the grabby cat,
Chuffy finally pops it one, it makes a big fuss, but stays around to keep causing trouble.
Wut Mogsmurch got?
"Hee hee. Moggy swing so high he not even give a longhshanks a knock in the head."
Although Poog secretly hopes he won't do the same on his next turn.
Attack
Damage
The Grabby Cat punches Poog in the eye - making him a bit like a Panda.
Poog makes his sad panda face, and screams in evil frustration. "This terror must be half dog (or maybe even half horse!) to be so vicious!"
The toad atop Poog's head gives an encouraging 'ribbit', but it doesn't help Poog hit the cat.
The grabby cat seems like it is just magic!
Reta considers trying to wrestle the dumb cat, but decides watching Poog have to duck is too much fun to not try again.
for
Grabby Cat slips the blow...!
Chuffy, just like his whelp-mates, swings and misses poorly this time.
Attack
Damage
The Grabby Cat seems too busy evading blows to make its own...
Party up!
Reta put down club and use hand this time, trying to grab at that darn cat.
Reta can't seem to grip it!
Muttering a prayer to Zarongel (really, just a complaint about how he's never there when needed), Poog takes aim and swings again.
Poog lands a small smack on it!
/Chuffy shot!
Chufness gets calm, then takes a measured swing at the overpowered feline, attempting to remove its thinking parts.
The Grabby Cat is unbelievable - it MUST be a Darkfear Spirit!
Attack
It doesn't manage any more damage just yet though!
Reta try this again. Reta's plan can't fail: it can only be failed!
The Grabby Cat refuses to be grabbed.
The grabby cat gets whacked!
It seems a bit unhappy about that, and may soon be leaving!
Chuffy is getting the hang of his club, but cant seem to find his power...
The grabby cat eats the club hit - it looks completely boggly eyed!
Poog, senses the end is near (although whether for the scary beast or for Poog, he's not sure), and swings his club again.
Poog manages to get in a well timed blow and sends the thing flying into the long grasses with a resounding THWACK! It isn't looking so grabby now.
/end combat.
All that remains is to present the final toads...
The cave is otherwise dead silent.
"Hah. Poog definitely be mightiest."
Full of renewed confidence, Poog once again removes the toad from his head (shaking off a bit of the sticky mud that held it there), and presents it mightily to the dark.
Poog holds the toad aloft and sings goblin songs of glory.
"Our Licktoad fury has not ceased
As Poog has felled the fearsome beast!
(well, other Goblins helped, a piece)
"
... Poog struggles to find a good closing line ...
"And Chuffy's boils smell like yeast!"
As he marches forward, Poog also keeps his eye out for any treasures in the cave. It wouldn't be right if lesser warriors claimed it before Poog the Magnificent.
Poog can see some glints in the cave, and it stinks of grabby cat...
Poog boldly marches into the cave, his eye flitting to the sparklies.
The interior is dark, but goblin eyes pierce the gloom, revealing leaning and partially collapsed shelves, heaps of shattered pottery, a junk-strewn table, and rusting animal traps. A partially mummified but mostly skeletal human body slumps against one wall—the fabled “Spirit of Darkfear.” A broken-off, cobweb-strewn horsechopper (now useless as a weapon) juts from the corpse’s chest.
Searching the hut reveals two tanglefoot bags, four smokesticks, four tindertwigs, a meat hook, flint and tinder, some metal skewers, a rusty watch chain, a small wire cage, a pair of broken spectacles, a set of thieves’ tools, a set of false teeth, and a half-eaten, raccoon-scented bag of hardtack.
Chuffy smiles broadly,
"Face art DOES smelz of yeasty!" and he claps joyfully. He follows Poog, his new best friend into the cave!
He will quietly help himself to:
1 tanglefoot bag
bag of hardtack (to share, of course!)
"Hey, Spirit aint so tough." Reta says as she cautiously enters the tent and looks at the corpse. "He stuck there dead!"
With the utmost solemnity , Reta holds her way-too-fat toad up and declares to the skeleton. "Here Spirit: Reta showing how she true Licktoad." She takes a good lick of said toad. "See? you can't even licktoads yourself, Cause you got no tongue."
Poog helps himself to the other tanglefoot bag, as is his right, being the first to enter the cave. (Poog glares at Chuffy for grabbing the hardtack first, though.)
Poog also helps himself to the broken spectacles and watch chain. He turns the latter into a gaudy necklace.
[ooc[Can retcon any closing comments for the Cave :p[/ooc]
With their bold quest complete, the now full-fledged goblins are free to make their way back to Licktoad Village.
***
A colorfully painted wagon sits half-sunken in a patch of foul-smelling mud. Abominable words decorate the side of the wagon along with paintings of potions and magic trinkets. Bottles, barrels, pots, and all manner of real potions and curios poke out from beneath the bulging canvas that covers the top of the wagon.
A strange lady with an awesome hat is currently yelling at a donkey. She stops for a moment and waves at you like you are all old pals, and continues hassling the big dumb animal.
She looks JUST LIKE the picture on the bottle of yuk-yuk-yuk healing water you got off Kettlehead.
Poog offers to trade most* of his possessions for a potion that will make him breath fire.
* Possessions worth trading: chewed stick, half a banana, handfuls of dirt (3), square of burlap, wooden goblin doll, and the newly acquired broken spectacles and watch chain.
She starts gesticulating and smiling broadly and talking... it sounds like blah blah blah, but Mogmurch makes it out as longlegs, which is good, as he speaks longlegs!
Turns out she is selling more of these wonderful yuk-yuk potions for geeeepeeee's. You don't have any geeeppeeeeees though...
"Magical Maggies Miracle Medicine mends all your maladies! Just fifty gold pieces!" She exclaims then pauses a moment, perplexed by the more explosive request from Poog, translated by Mogmurch "I have these lovely bottles of Alchemist Fire! Just THIRTHY golds to such a discerning buyer - I have a couple, how many you want to buy!?" she smiles warmly.
Reta bristles as Mogmurch begins talking to the lady. Why everyone but Reta have cool hat? And look at that red hair - look stupid. She have dots on face too, probably sick. Not nearly pretty as Reta.
As Mogmurch explains the humanwords, Retsa asks him "Ask her why she trade with mighty goblins and not run in fear? We Licktoads now: that means we true part bestest tribe."
She pauses a moment awkwardly, as if that is not part of the usual back and forth of a trade pitch "Best tribe eh? That means the wealthiest no doubt! Excellent! So you have enough gold to buy these mighty offerings!" she looks delighted and holds up the flask of fluid tantalisingly and a hound out expectantly.