Following the tracks leads the goblins upward from the beach to a cave entrance at the base of the volcano. Here the ashen floor has been disturbed by a tall woman's steps and part of the stone of the volcano has slid aside to reveal a tunnel sloping gently upward. However, before they can enter, a fiendish form steps from the shadows. It looks to be a mixture of wolf and goblin, as tall as a human, but with goblinish features.
In Goblin, it says "Turn back, little kin, lest the Lady's wrath fall upon your head. Her icon goes to do its duty and we who serve must allow it to do so."
looking at the creature curiously without thinking he opens his mouth and this comes out. Hmmmmmmm, Which Lady and What kinds of Wrath.
"Our Lady, little kin: Lamashtu. Do I need to spell out what she does to those who displease her?"
"Spell for dat? I have spell for grow plants and spell for make better..."
Suddenly the barghest roars, a terrifyingly loud sound. "If you're lucky, little kin, she'll only kill you. If you're not, you'll wish for death for a thousand years and never get it. Now begone. You bore me and boredom makes me hungry."
"We have crazy pickle baby and glow fish if hungry. Lady has my sword?"
"You tire me, children. If that's your pigsticker in there with the Lady and she's chosen to take it from you, count yourself lucky and honored and GO AWAY. Before I decide to feast."
I not be tired you take nap and we prepare Viddles for Feast, Yuum, Where is they? They with the Lady and the Dogslicer, not pigsticker. Ank-hore shakes his head not sure how to explain the difference to the beast.
The barghest looks frankly astounded at you. "Are you daft? Is this some sort of divine test of my patience? Or are you lambs for the slaughter? Go. AWAY."
"Oooo lamb is good, Ank-hore you slaughter for sacrifice? Captain
Gutbucket make stew"
"sounds like plan, I find a lamb and slaughter for sacrifice, then we makes stew and do a roast one over fire for him." he point with his hook hand toward the creature.
"Where Crang he gud with words.. or was dat axes? He gud." Splurg gets confused before agreeing with himself that Crang is just good.
Crang appears from the bushes, pulling up his loincloth and shaking his head: Shtoopid froot. Make Crang all runny.
Impressed by the barghest's roar he rushed forward and plonks his axe on the ground head-first. Then he bows like in a picture he saw in a temple he was burning down and touches his head to the pommel of his axe before lifting up his head and declaring in an awed stage-whisper:
Mighty noise-face. Teach me the loud-loud secret!
The barghest rocks back on his heels. "Merciless Mother, what have I done to earn this burden? Loud secret? You just roar, little kin, from the chest, down deep here." He touches his chest to demonstrate. "Now go away. All of you. The Mother is not be disturbed right now."
Ank-hore looks at the beast taps his own chest right where the creature does Then with all his might and the air in his lungs "rooooaaar" Then smiles and nods his head with an affirmative.
Splurg claps for Ank-hore Turning to the Goblinkin "You big with big roar you help us get sword much lamb for you"
The barghest stares hard at you for a long, long time. Finally it just throws its arms up in the air. "Fine! Just go, go, go! I never saw you, you weren't here! I'm not getting paid enough to deal with this!" He mutters to himself and steps aside to let you pass.
Sad that Splurg didn't make a new friend but glad he's back after his sword he starts trotting down the trail
He done the smarty mouth thing then... I don't get it?
Crang trots after Splurg occasionally making small, experimental roars.
Your roars echo down the stone walls as you enter the tunnels heading into the interior of the volcano. The floor and walls begin to warm as you head farther in. Suddenly the tunnel stops, ending in a cascade of purple swirls that hang in midair, dancing before your eyes. There is no other exit, the only way forward is through. Steeling yourselves, you step through the energy...
In a world that is as close to paradise as you've ever seen. A vast port city stretches in front of you, smelling of salt and plunder. Ramshackle houses and buildings line the streets, all sized for goblins. Indeed all over goblins swarm the place, wearing fine clothing and looking dashing in their finery. A few humans, dirty and hunched over, sneak through the shadows, clearly in their proper place in the gutters.
A well-dressed goblin wearing a long coat and silks stops in front of you. "Aye, scrubs! Where d'ye travelers be from?" he barks in Goblin.
Splurg gapes at the fancy dressing and talking stranger. Before sputtering out "Me Sword?"
The goblin in the finery stares at Splurg for a moment. "Well, pleased ta meet ya, Sword! I be Kornish, captain of the Sweet Marie. Wat brings ye ta Port Gob?"
"Dere was dis ship..."
As the thoughts begin to form, Crang's speech crumbles in the face of conveying so much information.
He hides his embarassment by burping, farting and eating some earwax he's been keeping warm in his armpit.
Taking his time Roaring at Everything on the way behind the other Captains, when he see the others stop in front of a Fancy Goblin. "You Bez a Demons, I was always toldz to watch out for Gobs of Fancy Color they might be Magic."
The fancy gob laughs at this. "Ye be a funny lot! Ye must be country gobs, what with the talk o' demons and such. Like we'd have any'ting to fear from demons! Our Lady protects us and shepherds us. It's the damn angels ye gotta watch out fer! Ruddy bastards they are! Come, let's get a gull and a grog at the tavern! My treat!" He smiles, slaps Crang on the back heartily and heads toward a dockside tavern. A wooden sign has a decapitated gull spraying blood on it...
Once inside, you're shocked to see a thriving goblin business. There are no tables or chairs, just proper goblins sitting on the floor, chewing on still wriggling gulls and drinking smelly beer from wooden buckets. A gob sits in the back on a high chair, guarding what appears to be several barrels of pickles. The fancy gob throws him a wooden coin and takes a seat in an unused corner. A goblin-wife brings out a gull for each of you, its wings broken and its beak bound with string, still struggling, as well as a bucket of grog. The fancy gob takes a deep drink from it and hands it off to Crang, motioning to pass it around. Then he grabs a gull and bites its head off, chewing on the neck as it kicks.
"So, where ya from?"
Crang's eyes light up and he takes a Crang-sized draught from the bucket.
Once he can breathe again, he passes the bucket around.
Splurg sniffs at the bucket before handing it to Whosi
The grog is potent, if a little light on flavor. The gulls are much better, crunchy and full of fight. Unless anyone replies to his question, the fancy gob goes on, shrugging. "Don' wanna tell me, fine is fair. Yer here onna great occasion, lads! The Lady herownself is said t'be in town, bearing some sorta talkin' sword and seekin' a treasure or such. We're all gatherin' tomorrow to hear her speak, y'know. She's holed up in da temple tonight. Right 'n proper, and all."
Splurg listens with interest as he finds out where his sword will be tonight.
Crang turns to stare, goggle-eyed, at Splurg but manages to resist the urge to call out She's got your sord! by stuffing a whole wing in his gob.
Seeing the interest on their faces, the gob continues. "The temple? You lot didn't see it on the way in, then? It's the big pile of stone over there. Used to be a fancy longshanks place, till we beat them down like the curs they be! Now we keeps them as garbage pickers and beasts of burden like they oughta be! Ha!" His gestures point to a large stone ruin, half crumbled, that dominates the skyline of the town. You can easily find it.
"Tanks for the gulls and beer, wez got to get back to lookin for my friendz" Splurg makes to leave all thoughts on his sword
The fancy gob shrugs and waves at you. "Best o' luck wit' dat!" Outside the night is full of random noises as parties rage on dives all over town. The ruined cathedral is easily visible, not the least because it seems to be on fire...
"Iz on fire, Whosi musta beat us dare"
Crang snorts and gargles a huge ball of phlegm and snot into his hand and then offers it to the new goblin, "Am Crang! Good Grub!"
Crang's offer of friendship is happily accepted with a similar response of spitting and handshaking. Crang suddenly notes that he is alone in the room and heads outside to find his comrades, only to see the temple in flames. Rising up from the flames is a crimson dragon, its muzzle dripping fire. It has only two hind legs, though with no forelimbs and it seems to bear a rider. The rider wears gleaming full plate armor, silver and resplendent in the reflected fire. Across the rider's lap lays the figurehead of Lamashtu, bound with silver chains. Splurg's sword is stuck in the silver rider's belt.
Below on the ground, striding boldly from the flames, while absentmindedly casting spells or throwing daggers at fleeing goblins, is another familiar sight: a female elf in wizard's robes, a beardless dwarf with a lute across his back and a shifty looking halfling throwing daggers at the backs of fleeing gobs.
Seeing the lot of you, they pause and strike heroic, if stupid looking, poses. The rider on the back of the dragonish beast hovers above and shouts in a booming voice, "FLEE, little evildoers! For the Scions of Righteousness have captured this avatar of doom, this committer of evil, this walking statue of wickedness! Flee lest our righteous might fall upon you like the hammer of just goodness! For we are sworn to do good in a world of evil! For we shine like the beacon of innocence in a guilty world! We are... we are.." The figure seems to run out of pithy cliches to spout and the dragon-mount gives what can only be a long suffering sigh. "Anyway, FLEE! For we shall royally mess you up!" The rider seems satisfied with this and points at the gobs.
Seeing the flaming carnage, Crang perks up, Shiny man! Les killim!
Splurg sends Spots off to help Crang and casts chill metal on the Knight in chainmail.
Spots attack on whomever Crang attacks
bite vs ac
on hit trip
CM attack
1 Cold None
2 Icy 1d4 points
3–5 Freezing 2d4 points
6 Icy 1d4 points
7 Cold None
The armor/weapons of the knight gets a will save DC 16 each piece gets seperate saves affects up to 175 lbs of metal
"Yaargh!" Crang begins to froth at the mouth as he activates his ring, falls into a rage and charges at the dwarf, foam flying from the corners of his mouth.
Splurg points to the shiny knight on dragonback and speaks a word in the druidic tongue. A brief mist of frost shoots from his finger toward the knight, but nothing more happens. Yet.
Crang froths at the mouth and charges the dwarf, who lets out a surprised "Ach! as the goblin barrels at him, colliding with the dwarf and sending them both tumbling backwards into the mud, rolling like a barrel.
Spots begins to attack the dwarf, but seeing the goblin foamer and the dwarf go flying, pounces on the halfling instead, pulling him from his feet by his thigh and sending blood splattering onto the elf woman's robes!
Crang goes all kinds of crazy on the dwarf with his claws
Init
Splurg smiles evily as he points the rod of wonder at the wizard and presses the button.
"I wonder what this will do"
Spots continues his halfling assault.
bite
if he's up will try and tirp again
CMB
claw
claw
Splurg aims the Rod of Wonder at the elven wizardess and presses the button. Suddenly the sparse growth in the muddy courtyard springs up to stand nearly a foot tall. The elven woman looks down in clear surprise, waiting for the inevitable attack, but none comes...
Spots, meanwhile, savages the poor prone halfling, whose attempts to roll away only lead to more attacks! He screams in a desperate, high pitched voice for help, only to see his teammates ignoring him.
Crang's mauling of the dwarf takes him completely by surprise! The dwarf manages to let out a single shocked yelp, which while melodious, is definitely not bardic. Blood flies as the goblin rips into the beardless dwarf, doing terrible damage!
Atop the fiery dragon-thing, the shiny knight begins to fidget and shift. He draws his sword and points it at Splurg, calling loudly for the dragon to attack. The dragon looks somewhat puzzled as the halfling and dwarf go down under the claws and teeth of the cat and barbarian. Finally the shiny man leaps down off the dragon and moves toward Splurg, readying his attack.
The elven wizard woman seems puzzled by the grass growing trick, but shaking her head, begins to intone eldritch words as she begins a spell...
Spots is enjoying his game and continues to batter the little mouse... err halfling
bite
if hits will continue to trip
UMB
claw
claw
Splurg seeing his grassy opportunity casts Entangle aiming to capture the Knight and the Wizard.
Yeargh!
More pummeling and ripping and tearing and hurts!
Splurg's spell catches the knight and the wizard in its grasp as the suddenly large grass becomes alive and grabby. Spots' attack of the halfling goes from funny to fatal as the poor little man's feeble struggles end.
Crang's mauling of the dwarf ends the same way, with a dead dwarf on the ground and the shiny knight looking aghast at the turn of events. He spins, as much as he can and looks at the drake with the figurehead of Lamashtu on its back. "You said this would be easy! You said they'd be simple to kill! You lied to me!"
The drake abruptly looks very very annoyed as its form wavers. In its place sits a blue dragon, looking dangerous and disgusted by the knight's words. "You stupid, stupid little fool. This was never about you! This was about them, and the sword and opening the greatest treasure vault the world has ever known!" He breathes upon the trapped knight and wizard and their cries of pain end abruptly as lightning consumes them.
All around you the goblin city wavers and disappears, replaced by a rocky cavern, inside of which a great pool of lava bubbles. You recognize the volcano as the same island you were on when you entered the portal. Or did you?
Behind the dragon is a huge gate. It is made of adamantine and lined with gems the size of a goblin's head. It has no hinges, seeming being set into the wall whole. In the center, at about head height is a large slot, a keyhole the size of Splurg's sword, as well as a round hole the size of a hand.
The dragon hisses in delight. "And here we are, as it was planned! The hapless fools who intercepted my sword, the pitiable figurehead who believed the lies I planted, and me, the mastermind of the whole deal. Yes, you fools found the sword as my minion was bringing it to me. I had labored for years to find it, and a pack of goblins! Goblins! Took it from me. But in doing so, you helped me find the second key, the hand of the god-touched! Stupid Lamashtu, who believed my tale that the sword would unlock the vault of Rovagug and allow her to defeat the Rough Beast and take its power. So she sent this statue, imbued with her power to take the sword and unlock the vault. But this is no prison, this is the treasure vault of Serivizius, the last Dragon King of an empire whose name is lost to the ages. He who forged that sword, intended to be the key to his vault for those worthy of its gifts. But it was lost, lost for so long. Until I discovered its fate and sent my minions to recover it! And now it is mine. And you, silly little goblin, will use it to open the Vault. Take it now, and open the Vault, and I shall reward you for your service. Do it! Do it now!"
Crang's fury fades and retrieves his fallen axe.
That done, he peers up at the dragon, Now go red!
The blue dragon sighs. "I weep for your species, goblin."
Green?