Baldwin the Merciful's: We Be Goblins (Inactive)

Game Master baldwin the merciful

We be Lick toads! We make raid!
Put the longshank s to the blade!♫ ♪♫
Burn them up from feet to head,
Mak e them hurt, then make them dead!♫
Cut the parents into ham,
Smush the babies into jam,
All the rest in pot get stewed,
We be Lick toads - you be food!
♪ ♪ ♪ ♫

A We Be Goblins Adventure Addyv'nture.



♫ ♪♫We be Lick toads! We make raid!
Put the longshank s to the blade!♫ ♪♫
♫♪ ♪Burn them up from feet to head,
Make them hurt, then make them dead!♫
♪♫ ♪Cut the parents into ham,
Smush the babies into jam,
All the rest in pot get stewed,
We be Lick toads - you be food!
♪ ♪ ♪ ♫

Adventure Background
When the goblins of the Licktoad tribe in Brinestump Marsh discovered that one of their own could write, they had no choice—they ran him out of town, tore down his hut, and burned all of his stuff. Writing, after all, is bad mojo, since it can steal words out of your head and thus snatch away your soul. Yet while even the exiled goblin’s name is now taboo (he’s known today only as “Scribbleface,” after the Licktoads branded some of his precious words onto his forehead and cheeks to punish him for breaking custom), the wonders the goblins found in his house were significant.

For Scribbleface had kept more secrets than his writing. Before the rest of his belongings were claimed or burned, the Licktoad goblins found a large trunk that contained several items of interest. To the majority of the tribe, it was the cache of exotic fireworks in the trunk that was the most impressive, but to the leaders of the tribe, it was the intriguing map (one that, fortunately, contained no writing—only nice, safe drawings and dotted lines). This map showed the extent of Brinestump Marsh, including the route from the Licktoad village to an old shipwreck near the coastline that—according to the drawings on the map—contained many more crates of fireworks. How Scribbleface had come into possession of the fireworks, the map, and this knowledge in the first place was largely irrelevant to the goblins, for if the spot marked on the map were to indeed lead to more fireworks, the Licktoads would be unstoppable! Or, if not unstoppable, at least they’d be more firework rich! Think of all the longshank houses they could burn down with a big supply of fireworks!

How to Join

•Pre-generated goblins: In your application, please name the goblin you want to play and write an original Goblin Song.

•Create your own goblin: 15 point buy, level 1, core classes only (no Wizards, you heard what they did to Scribbleface), 1 traits, average starting wealth for class, original Goblin Song.

I will be choosing players by the best song.

Pregenerated Characters:

Reta Bigbad:

Female goblin fighter 1
NE Small humanoid (goblinoid)
Init +3; Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +9

Defense
AC 16, touch 14, flat-footed 13 (+2 armor, +3 Dex, +1 size)
hp 13 (1d10+3)
Fort +4, Ref +3, Will +1

Offense
Speed 30 ft.
Melee dogslicer +3 (1d4+1/19–20)
Ranged shortbow +5 (1d4/×3)

Statistics
Str 13, Dex 17, Con 14, Int 10, Wis 12, Cha 6
Base Atk +1; CMB +1; CMD 14
Feats Dog-Sniff-Hate, Skill Focus (Perception)
Trait Balloon-Headed
Skills Perception +9, Ride +11, Stealth +11
Languages Goblin

Combat Gear potion of cure light wounds, potion of spider climb
Other Gear leather armor, dogslicer, shortbow with 20
arrows in a quiver decorated with dog ears, lucky pet
toad (“Spotol”), jar of pickled halfling toes just about
ready for eating (equivalent to 1 day’s trail rations),
toasting fork, bridal veil, halfling ladies’ corset, 20 feet
of rope with dead moles sewn into it, small silver mirror,
jar of human perfume (half drunk), meat hook, leather
satchel, flint and tinder, set of false teeth, pocketful
of caterpillars

New Feat: Dog-Sniff-Hate
Unlike many goblins, you’re not particularly afraid of
dogs. You know what dogs smell like, and that smell
makes you mad. Very mad.
Prerequisite: Goblin, Skill Focus (Perception)
Benefit: You gain the scent ability, but only against
canines (including dogs, goblin dogs, wolves, worgs,
yeth hounds, and any similar creature, subject to GM
approval). Against these creatures, you gain a +1 morale
bonus on attack rolls and a +2 morale bonus on weapon
damage rolls.

Goblin Trait: Balloon Headed
Your head is particularly wide and large, even for a
goblin. You gain a +1 bonus on Perception checks, and
Perception is always a class skill for you. Any Escape
Artist checks that requires you to squeeze your head
through a tight space take a –8 penalty.

Chuffy Lickwound:

Male goblin rogue 1
NE Small humanoid (goblinoid)
Init +4; Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +5

Defense
AC 17, touch 15, flat-footed 13 (+2 armor, +4 Dex, +1 size)
hp 11 (1d8+3)
Fort +2, Ref +6, Will +1

Offense
Speed 30 ft.
Melee dogslicer +5 (1d4–1/19–20)
Ranged dart +5 (1d3–1)
Special Attacks sneak attack +1d6

Statistics
Str 8, Dex 19, Con 14, Int 12, Wis 13, Cha 6
Base Atk +0; CMB –2; CMD 12
Feats Weapon Finesse
Trait Pustular
Skills Acrobatics +8, Bluff +2, Climb +3, Disable
Device +8, Escape Artist +8, Knowledge (local)
+5, Perception +5, Ride +8, Sleight of Hand +8,
Stealth +16
Languages Common, Goblin
SQ trapfinding +1

Combat Gear potion of cure light wounds, potion of jump,
6 caltrops

Other Gear leather armor, dogslicer, 6 darts,
lucky pet toad (“Fat Frog”), lock of hair from
Goodwife Lotty still tied around her dog’s
paw (worn on a thong about Chuffy’s neck),
3 metal skewers, stuffed raven, pet spider
(called Stankrush) in a wire cage, 3 spare
bug cages, bottle of brine-soaked alligator
eyes (equivalent to 1 day’s trail rations),
child’s doll with the eyes taken out, grappling
hook, 3 tindertwigs, curved sewing needle, set
of thieves’ tools, cowbell (worn)

Goblin Trait: Pustular
Your face is covered in unpleasant pimples and outright
boils that have a tendency to pop at inopportune
moments. Although this makes you particularly
ugly, you’re also used to discomfort. Whenever you’re
subjected to an effect that causes the sickened condition,
you may make two saving throws to avoid the effect (if
a saving throw is allowed), taking the better of the two
results as your actual saving throw.

Poog of Zarongel:

Male goblin cleric 1
NE Small humanoid (goblinoid)
Init +6; Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +2

Defense
AC 17, touch 13, flat-footed 15 (+4 armor, +2 Dex, +1 size)
hp 10 (1d8+2)
Fort +3, Ref +2, Will +4

Offense
Speed 30 ft.
Melee dogslicer +1 (1d4/19–20)
Ranged javelin +3 (1d4)
Special Attacks channel negative energy 4/day (DC 11, 1d6)
Domain Spell-Like Abilities (CL 1st; concentration +3)
At will—speak with animals (4 rounds/day)
5/day—fire bolt (1d6 fire)
Cleric Spells Prepared (CL 1st; concentration +3)
1st—burning handsD (DC 13), cure light wounds, divine favor
0 (at will)—bleed (DC 12), detect magic, guidance
D Domain spell; Domains Animal, Fire

Statistics
Str 10, Dex 14, Con 13, Int 8, Wis 15, Cha 12
Base Atk +0; CMB –1; CMD 11
Feats Improved Initiative
Trait Goblin Bravery
Skills Ride +4, Spellcraft +3, Stealth +8
Languages Goblin

Combat Gear wand of cure light wounds (9 charges)

Other Gear chain shirt, dogslicer, 2 javelins, lucky pet toad
“Dogfinder,” squashed dried toad (his previous lucky pet
toad), jar of pickled fish heads (the equivalent of 1 day’s trail
rations), 6 torches, flint and tinder, almost empty salt shaker,
pig’s tail (snack), wooden flute (too
splintery to play for long without injury)

Goblin Trait: Goblin Bravery
You have a worrying propensity for
overconfidence in combat. When facing an
enemy that’s larger than you, if you have no allies
in any adjacent squares, your posturing, bravado, and
cussing grant a +1 trait bonus on attack rolls with nonreach
melee weapons.

Mogmurch:

Male goblin alchemist 1
NE Small humanoid (goblinoid)
Init +4; Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +3

Defense
AC 17, touch 15, flat-footed 13 (+2 armor, +4 Dex, +1 size)
hp 10 (1d8+2)
Fort +5, Ref +6, Will –1

Offense
Speed 30 ft.
Melee club +0 (1d4–1)
Ranged bomb +6 (1d6+2 fire)
Special Attacks bomb 3/day (1d6+2 fire, DC 12)
Alchemist Extracts Prepared (CL 1st)
1st—cure light wounds, shield
Extracts Known detect undead, jump, reduce person, true strike

Statistics
Str 8, Dex 18, Con 13, Int 15, Wis 8, Cha 10
Base Atk +0; CMB –2; CMD 12
Feats Brew Potion, Great Fortitude, Throw Anything
Trait Bouncy
Skills Craft (alchemy) +6, Heal +3, Knowledge (nature) +6,
Perception +3, Ride +8, Sleight of Hand +8, Stealth +12,
Survival +3
Languages Common, Goblin, Varisian
SQ alchemy (alchemy crafting +1, identify potions), mutagen
(+4/–2, +2 natural, 10 minutes)

Combat Gear potions of cure light wounds (2), acid (2),
alchemist’s fire (3), smokestick, tanglefoot bag

Other Gear leather armor, club, lucky pet toad “Amfibier,”
spectacles (for show), gourd of pickled leeches just about
ready to eat (counts as 1 day’s field rations), juicy slug in a
small pot (snack), skull face mask, metal codpiece, jester’s
hat, pumpkin-head lantern, black eyepatch (with hole
cut in it to see), hard leather boot (used as belt pouch),
formula book (contains all extract formulae known)

Goblin Trait: Bouncy
Your bones, flesh, and skin are a bit more elastic than
those of most goblins—when you fall, you tend to
bounce a little better than them as a result. Whenever
you take falling damage, the first 1d6 points of lethal
damage suffered in the fall are automatically converted
to nonlethal damage. You also gain a +2 bonus on all
Reflex saves made to avoid unexpected falls.

Note: I will complete this module. If you look at my profile you'll see that I run, and have competed, several games. I've successfully competed the entire COT AP; I've completed two short modules (one last week); I have a long running Rappan Athuk campaign; and I'm also running a successful Razor Coast Campaign. Simply put, I'm not going to disappear barring some sort of emergency.

I use maptools for mapping. I would like two posts a day and I'm aiming on finishing this module in 30 days or so. I will roll initiatives and look at my other games to see how my combats run. Communication is key to any successful game. Newbies are encouraged to apply. No PFS credit given.

If you have a history of dropping or disappearing from games please don't apply.

If this interests you, write your goblin song.

I'll keep this recruitment open long enough to get the positions filled and some fun songs made, but I'd like to close it out by Saturday or Sunday. This is subject to change.


Oh and if you're afraid of snatching words from your head, then do what any sneaky goblin would do...steal someone else's nasty written words for your song. You are goblins.


Shamelessly bumps the recruitment thread.


Will this only be the module or is there a chance of continuation afterward?


Why not.

I am Mogmurch! I make Fire!
Roast em! Toast em! In a pyre!
Watch them burn and scream and cry!
Chant and laugh until they die!
Light the house! Smoke and smog!
Don't forget the filthy dog!
Salt the wounds! Eat the flesh!
Mogmurch! Lick Toads! We be best!


Nohwear wrote:
Will this only be the module or is there a chance of continuation afterward?

It'll only be the module. I already run two fulltime campaigns online: Rappan Athuk and Razor Coast. When I run modules it is way for me to run short finite games.


baldwin the merciful wrote:
Nohwear wrote:
Will this only be the module or is there a chance of continuation afterward?
It'll only be the module. I already run two fulltime campaigns online: Rappan Athuk and Razor Coast. When I run modules it is way for me to run short finite games.

Well in that case, no thank you. But good luck though.


I am Grinner, they call me,
Bite the face, crunch the knee,
All these things, make me he he he,
Whether dark or during the day,
Bits of dog, wither away,
Darkness in my teeth, burns, but unlike fire!
If the truth be what you seek,
then call me Burn Teeth Biter!


This is not an application, since Twitchy is happily engaged in another We Be Goblins play by post. (She also doesn't fit your selection criteria, since she's a Winged Marauder Alchemist.)

However, I love that you are using Rude Songs as your selection method, and can't resist joining in! Our whole goblin group posts in rhyme.

_____________

"Twitchy Boom Boom talks in rhyme
She throws bombs all the time.
Yes, she gets a little wordy,
Riding on her vulture birdie.
But Twitchy's fast and Twitchy's smart
(Can cook up long shanks in a tart.)
She flies up high and overhead
Makes plans to kill things dead!"

And this is one I wrote when we originally misread the strength of a Giant Vulture from the bestiary entry instead of the animal companion, and thought (for a few seconds) that we might be able to get the whole team aloft!

"Do you dare ride Goblin Air?
Hang on tight with your knees!
Try hard not to sneeze!
If you fall, do so with flair!

Goblin Air, the bugs are free!
Goblin Air, with long shank stew
(Be sure to tip your flight crew)
Gob --- Aieeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

______________

Good luck with your game -- it sounds great!


Let goblin glory continue in song.

Grand Lodge

GM Baldwin, this is also not an application. But it looks so much better than <<BUMP!>>

♪♫ Reta fight and slice and crunch.
Me have longshanks thighs for lunch!

Me not scared of dogs or b!tches,
Burning them has me in stitches!

Horses rear – I run them through.
Cook and eat … not turn to glue!

Poog and Mogmurch; Chuff all fail!
Me smart and hot – in wedding veil! ♪♫


I'm enjoying the goblin songs, keep them coming don't be shy.


Just ruminating on a Bard to be a know-not-all...

[muttered under his ragged breath in a doomy dirge-like monosyllable]

"Sing you
bring you
All to heel
Feel the song
that weals or heals
Spark is quick
to bring to pains
But mostly
words
it is
he rains

So bring your ears
and 'slicers here
Spark will help the fear to go
Luck and blood
Of both, a flood
A chant of doom
or dust
to know

A spark of
fire
A spark of
might
A spark to set
the night alight
Spark is quick
and none too fooly
When the goblins get unruly"


Lick Toad tribe applicants, so far:

Zayne Iwatani - as mighty Mogmurch goblin alchemist
Burn Teeth Biter - as sneaky fire/darkness cleric

"Chief Gutwad the Mighty not so happy tribe not volunteering. He kicks a runt, and starts to chant the Toad Stool song,

♪♫ ♪Toad stools, gotta stomp ‘em
Smoosh ‘em, mix ‘em in all up
Whip ‘em, slather ‘em,
and put 'em in your cup
toad stools.♪♫ ♪

"Me give you mighty courage with toad stools."


"Chief Gutwad: You no like idea of Spark, goblin Bard? No like song? Too much big words?"


Chief Gutwad scratch head "did not recognize goblin in disguise...look like yappy, tail chasin, flee flickin' mutt." Nods, "guud...fool chief...fool swamp lizard next."

Three brave volunteers.


Not an application.

baldwin the merciful wrote:
Nohwear wrote:

Will this only be the module or is there a chance of continuation afterward?

It'll only be the module. I already run two fulltime campaigns online: Rappan Athuk and Razor Coast. When I run modules it is way for me to run short finite games.

Maybe someone wants to know if you intend on running "We be Goblins Too"?


Alex G St-Amand wrote:

Not an application.

baldwin the merciful wrote:
Nohwear wrote:

Will this only be the module or is there a chance of continuation afterward?

It'll only be the module. I already run two fulltime campaigns online: Rappan Athuk and Razor Coast. When I run modules it is way for me to run short finite games.

Maybe someone wants to know if you intend on running "We be Goblins Too"?

That's an option I would consider.


"Chief Gutwad not pleaz'd, not at all. Need more brave gobl'ns but tribe send me nut'in." He thumps his chest and scratches his arse. "Chief Gutwad sing you Boom, boom, kaboom song to inspire courage, or I come and burn your hut down."

Boom Boom Song
Boom, boom, kaboom,
That’s the sound of goblin might
Blast them! Splash them
make them go up like a light!
Fire be good, flame be better,
As we make them deader!
Let’s give them some doom.
Boom, boom, kaboom


Is the Feral Gnasher Barbarian archetype allowed?


We have a feral gnasher in the WBG campaign that Twitchy plays in. He's hilarious!


Nohwear wrote:
Is the Feral Gnasher Barbarian archetype allowed?

Sure.


I humbly present the song of Zunk, the rogue goblin with a big ego and an even bigger stomach.

♫ ♪ ♫ Zunk be sneaky, Zunk be quick,
Zunk is one of toads that lick.
He will see and hear and steal,
and outrun longshanks on his heel. ♪ ♪ ♫

♫ ♫ ♪ When licktoads need to sneak and swipe,
They come to Zunk with something ripe.
He will eat till belly's swollen,
Then come back with something stolen! ♫ ♪ ♪

♪ ♫ ♪ All their items he will nick,
then lose them quickly with a trick.
But if longshanks draw their steal,

ZUNK WILL STAB AND MAKE THEM SQUEAL! ♫ ♪ ♫

Basically he's going to be a fat goblin rogue. His stealthiness will defy physics.


Chief stomps his foot to Zonk's song. Fat goblin guud...make swamp lizard full, so others get away."

We have four goblins:

Zayne Iwatani - as mighty Mogmurch goblin alchemist
Burn Teeth Biter - as sneaky fire/darkness cleric
Spark, goblin Bard
Zong -fat goblin rogue

Chief selects those four stuupid brave goblins, but he is keeping recruitment open till tomorrow evening at 7:00 pm. He will send a group of five.

If anyone else want to apply I'll make the last selection tomorrow at 7:00 pm.

Those selected I'll open the discussion thread in a few minutes. If you want to BS over there that's fine with me.


Pick Freigaar, here's its theme song!

♫ ♪ ♫Puts on armor, grabs his axe
when chief calls to order task!
Freigaar hopes it be as fine
As giving Scribbley a black eye!

♫ ♪ ♪Let it out its cozy cage,
Freigaar's bored and wants to rage!
Slices dogs with cries of joy,
plays with longshanks like they're toys!

It will bite and gnaw and bash,♫ ♪ ♪
Slash, gnash, thrash and burn to ash!
Take their gold to Licktoads stash.

When fun ends and Freigaar's blue
—No more longshanks juice to spew!—
Time to play with goblins, too!♫ ♪ ♫

Sorry about the late application, but I see you might have a spot for a martial character...


Chief Gutwad walks over to Freigaar, and whacks the barbarian's thick skull with a knotty club. "Guud and hard, guud for taking licks...you go move over to discussion and game thread."

Game recruitment is now closed.


Yess!!! Hoped we'd see a Barbarian...

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