This spell enables you or a creature you touch to move and attack normally for the duration of the spell while under the influence of magic or extraordinary effects that usually impede movement, actions, or attacks, such as paralysis, poison, auras, natural spider webs, solid fog, slow, web, compulsion spells with a paralysis-type effect, or any effect that generates a similar effect. This does not have an effect on difficult terrain or natural phenomenon (such as being buried in a cave in generated by any means magical or mundane. This does not affect the prone condition or prevent trips. This spell does not affect indirect impediments on movement such as those from charm or compulsion spells that control the mind, daze, stun, sicken, or nauseate the target or have some effect other than a direct effect stated clearly in the spell effect that slows or halts movement (versus an indirect affect on movement such as that caused by daze or stun).
You or the creature touched gains a bonus equal to caster level on CMB checks made to escape a grapple or act while grappled, on CMD against grapple attacks, and concentration checks to cast a spell while grappled.
The spell also allows the subject to move and attack normally while underwater, even with slashing weapons such as axes and swords or with bludgeoning weapons such as flails, hammers, and maces. The freedom of movement spell does not, however, grant water breathing nor does it grant locomotion while underwater. It does allow you to move at your full speed as a move action or twice your speed with a double move and take a 5 foot step if you make a swim check . The DC for the swim check is determined by the type of water.
I want to make freedom of movement an easier to adjudicate spell. I feel as though the spell as written is confusing and allows for interpretations that overreach the intent of the spell given the sheer number of effects that can alter your ability to "move and act normally".
I threw in the grapple part because I don't like how this spell turns grappling and improved grab into a trivial ability. High level Large or larger creatures do have rather insane grappling CMBs and CMDs. But this is a major attack ability and tactic of high level dragons, creatures like the Shoggoth, and animals, yet once you obtain freedom of movement you are completely immune. A ring of freedom movement is on all my players list of "must have gear" for this reason. So I wanted to come up with alternative means of freedom of movement providing a bonus against grappling and improved grab without making the ability trivial. Do you think this version would make accomplish this?
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I sympathize with the frustration here, but I disagree with your proposed remedy. First, and this is just my opinion, but I find the suggested rewrite to be much more confusing than the original. This is likely because I never consider FoM to grant any protection from events like a massive cave-in, being charmed, or getting tripped, but I would find adjudicating what you have proposed to require much more time studying the spell in question.
I suggest you role with this and get creative in dealing with FoM whoring players (such as myself) because if you simply break it as Gansk has suggested, you're not making things fun but just limiting your players options to prevent obvious dangers. As you indicated, later on creatures have stupidly high CMB/CMDs and grapple attacks with extraordinarily perilous consequences. It's the whole reason FoM exists, and why the ring (and 40k ain't cheap) exists and is so valuable because it finally provides one with a defense against so many, many likely attacks (mass hold person, for example).
Get creative, let your party ring up, later have a dragon attempt a fly-by snatch-and-grab, fail, perhaps try again, and then simply fly away. Your party celebrates their savvy style and you then later have said dragon return under the effects of an anti-magic field, grab someone, and fly off with them to do as you please.
Spin this anyway you like (targeted dispel magic on the ring, trip-happy fighters, even a nasty sunder attempt), but remember the vital tenant, you can shape the world however you wish, don't sink to banning a coveted item just because it makes things inconvenient for you, let everyone (yourself included) have their fun.
I wouldn't ban Freedom of Movement, or the Freedom of Movement ring. But the fact that it entirely negates grapple attempt is a bit absurd.
I'd say the sensible thing would be for it to provide a +20 bonus to any attempt to escape a grapple, and to CMD against being grappled. Functional immunity at lower levels, and highly competitive, but not immune against superhuman master wrestlers or immense dragons and demons.
I do like the idea of changing the spell to providing a bonus to resisting and escaping grapples, but don't forget to name the type of bonus it grants. That will help the ring be a little bit more situational if its bonus doesn't stack with some other thing they have, whether it's a racial ability, class ability or other spell. I personally would drop the addition to Concentration checks, but I personally like the idea of there being certain anti-spellcaster tactics that can't simply be outright negated by a spell.
You could probably extend this to saving throws against conditions that cause the Entangled condition or similar stuff- that could help generalize it a bit instead of going through the spell list of every class and making a list of what it negates and what it doesn't work on (especially considering that spell lists tend to grow as more books get published).
Another sore spot there seems to be in interpreting this spell is the difference between stopping movement physically, mentally, and the magic that blurs the lines between the two. Terrain and spells such as Web obviously try physical means, which is exactly what the spell is meant to bypass. That's fine, let it do that.
Stunning, Dazing, Charm and Nausea are obviously mostly mental compulsions- the spell says it lets you move, but your character isn't wanting to for one reason or another, no matter what they player may think is tactically best. Spell won't help clear your head or will you to move, it just makes it easier to move in environments keeping you from doing so.
Paralysis and wholly magical effects such as Slow are sometimes hard to pin down, though, whether it's more mental or physical. A DM is needed here, but in absence of a clear delineation I would let the spell at least add a (relatively) huge resistance bonus against the effect- something like half caster level, since it used to prevent it entirely. That's often going to be an easy roll, but there is still a slim chance of failure that can add tension if that's what you're going for.
The reason I incorporated the concentration bonus is become CMDs are so high as to make it nearly impossible for a caster to get off a spell when grappled. It doesn't matter what the spells components are, it could be a verbal only spell, and they have to make a concentration check versus the creatures CMD to cast. When a caster gets grappled, even with a +20 bonus to CMB he isn't going to escape creatures made to grapple. But with a bonus to concentration he might be able to get off a dimension door or similar spell to escape. Which is how I think they should escape.
I don't want grappling a caster to be an auto-win. And adding to their CMD or CMB is pointless as few casters will have either of those high enough to matter. So giving the bonus to their concentration provides casters with an equivalent defense to non-casters.