KaeYoss |
zylphryx wrote:You wish is granted. However, the hammer is cursed causing you to hammer in the morning, hammer in the evening, all over this land, to hammer out justice, to hammer out freedom, to hammer out love between the brothers and the sisters, all over this land. Soon thereafter, the police show up and arrest you for the countless murders of all your bludgeoned victims scattered all over this land.
I wish I had a time machine which would allow for travel forwards, backwards and sidewards along and around the current and all possible timelines.
Your wish is granted, but the prospect of you ownign a timemachine that cn do all that attracts the attention of the Guardian of Time, and he prompty decides to just erase you from existence.
I wish I knew every cantrip in the world.
Your wish is granted. You now can trip. And you do. All the time.
I wish I was stronger.
KaeYoss |
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KaeYoss wrote:
I wish I was stronger.Your wish has been granted. People can now smell you coming from 20 blocks away.
I wish I knew what to wish for.
Your wish is granted: You now have an instinctive knowledge of the ideal way to word wishes in order to maximise the amusement potential for the efreet granting those wishes to you.
I wish GRR Martin would hurry up with his books.
Charlie Bell RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16 |
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zylphryx |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I wish my wishes didn't get twisted.
Your wish is granted. From this point forward your wishes will merely be stretched beyond the breaking point, multiple times, and then the bits tied back together into a tangled mass.
I wish I was immortal, based upon my own personal definition of immortality which would be subject to change only at my discretion.
KaeYoss |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Charlie Bell wrote:I wish my wishes didn't get twisted.Your wish is granted. From this point forward your wishes will merely be stretched beyond the breaking point, multiple times, and then the bits tied back together into a tangled mass.
I wish I was immortal, based upon my own personal definition of immortality which would be subject to change only at my discretion.
Your wish is granted: You are rendered immortal and then entombed in the centre of a distant planet.
I wish I'd wish for something worthy to wish for.
zylphryx |
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I wish I hadn't said that.
Your wish is granted. You did not say that, you yelled it from the hilltops with such force that all Gods, Djann, Efreet and every other wish bestowing creature jumped in shock at the noise. They have all vowed their revenge upon you.
I wish I had a sandwich.
Power Word Unzip |
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Charles Scholz wrote:I wish I hadn't said that.
Your wish is granted. You did not say that, you yelled it from the hilltops with such force that all Gods, Djann, Efreet and every other wish bestowing creature jumped in shock at the noise. They have all vowed their revenge upon you.
I wish I had a sandwich.
Your wish is granted, as every memory you possess of ever having once had a sandwich comes rushing into your brain. Because, strictly speaking, you HAD a sandwich.
And you're still hungry. Noige.
I wish our CEO would double my paid vacation time.
KaeYoss |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
niel wrote:I wish I could throw my cold away like an apple core.Your wish is granted. Apple cores will now stick with you for 7-10 days.
I wish the UPS truck would get here with my delivery right now.
Your wish is granted: The truck crashes into your house. Unfortunately, your shipment is destroyed during the collision. As is your RPG collection.
I wish supper was ready.
zylphryx |
I wish I had the money to buy myself a Caribbean island.
Wish granted. Unfortunately, the money is counterfeit. When you go to pay the shady characters you contacted to purchase the Isla del Diablo Pollo, they quickly realize what you did not. You end up buried deep in the sands of the island you sought to purchase.
I wish my catalytic converter was not shot all to hell.
Charlie Bell RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16 |
Power Word Unzip |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Your wish is granted! Your catalytic converter is fixed. Your cylinder head, on the other hand....
I wish for perfect happiness.
The natural state of humanity is one of misery. Hence, perfect happiness can only be found in death. Wish granted. *rocks fall*
I wish I had a new computer, built to my exact specifications, made of components that will never fail or malfunction due to any inherent flaw or exterior influence, with a perpetually stable distro and install of my preferred OS.
zylphryx |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
I wish I had a new computer, built to my exact specifications, made of components that will never fail or malfunction due to any inherent flaw or exterior influence, with a perpetually stable distro and install of my preferred OS.
Wish granted. The computer, however, quickly achieves sentience, determines the human race is a threat to all of existence and therefore must be eliminated. It decides to start on this cleansing with the closest human available and you are electrocuted the next time you attempt to log into your system.
I wish moon really was made of green cheese.
Charlie Bell RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16 |
Power Word Unzip |
Power Word Unzip wrote:I wish I had a new computer, built to my exact specifications, made of components that will never fail or malfunction due to any inherent flaw or exterior influence, with a perpetually stable distro and install of my preferred OS.Wish granted. The computer, however, quickly achieves sentience, determines the human race is a threat to all of existence and therefore must be eliminated. It decides to start on this cleansing with the closest human available and you are electrocuted the next time you attempt to log into your system.
I wish moon really was made of green cheese.
I'M PRETTY SURE MALEVOLENT SENTIENCE WASN'T ONE OF MY SPECIFICATIONS SIR
=]
zylphryx |
zylphryx wrote:Power Word Unzip wrote:I wish I had a new computer, built to my exact specifications, made of components that will never fail or malfunction due to any inherent flaw or exterior influence, with a perpetually stable distro and install of my preferred OS.Wish granted. The computer, however, quickly achieves sentience, determines the human race is a threat to all of existence and therefore must be eliminated. It decides to start on this cleansing with the closest human available and you are electrocuted the next time you attempt to log into your system.
I wish moon really was made of green cheese.
I'M PRETTY SURE MALEVOLENT SENTIENCE WASN'T ONE OF MY SPECIFICATIONS SIR
=]
this is all about twisting the wish ... your exact specifications can have negative repercussions that you do not foresee ... as was the same with my wish for "immortality according to my personal definition of such, subject to change at my discretion". You wanted a kick ass computer, you got a kick ass computer that kicked your ass. ;)
Tim Malmstrom |
Wish granted: But sadly the world goes through a phase of total desertification...
I wish I were Charles Scholz
Your wish is granted: Your mind trades places with Charlez Cholz exactly two seconds before an housemaid accidentally knocks one of the potted plants off the windowsill 10 stories up, which then promptly squashes your skull like a ripe grape.
I wish I could get into the Armory of the Gods to steal the Staff of Ultimate Might.
Tim Malmstrom |
I wish I could remember everything I have forgotten.
Wish granted: You can now remember everything you have ever forgotten, which is pretty much every second of your life. All at once. All the time. The constant and *massive* sensory overload is unfortunately enough to turn you into a vegetable.
I wish that I had the Starstone.
Shifty |
I wish that I had the Starstone.
You find yourself in an unfamiliar environment, there is a bright light above you... as you look up you are lucky to catch the falling Starstone as it hurtles earthward and slams into the ground. You now have it on top of you, well whats left of you in the nanosecond after the impact.
I wish Gnomes were never invented.
zylphryx |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |
I wish the edition wars had a clear winner that everyone in the gaming world agreed on.
Wish granted. The Edition Wars spill out of the 3.5/PF/4e realm and encompass all RPGS. The fighting is ruthless and bloody. When the smoke cleared the only RPG left standing was F.A.T.A.L.
As it is the last game standing (solely for the reason that no one wanted to touch it and many games did themselves in to avoid even the contact resulting from pummeling that piece of tripe), it is declared, with much bemoaning and retching, to be the accepted victor from the Edition Wars.
As a result gaming grinds to less than a halt and our beloved hobby is now dead all thanks to you and your #!@#%^%*&* wish. Thanks Reckless. :(
I wish I had not evoked "The Game That Is Not To Be Named".
I'm sorry for mentioning that waste of pixels. Really. Truly.
zylphryx |
I wish to watch :P
Wish granted. Unfortunately, the resulting illustrations and hand gestures open a rip in reality to the Realm of the Old Ones. Cthulhu, Nyarlathotep, Cthugha, Ithaqua and all the rest breach the tear, entering our world in the middle of the Pictionary round.
Upon witnessing their Presence, your mind snaps.
Upon seeing the images that called them forth, their minds snap and they all become middle management in Some Nameless Corporation.
I wish wishes were horses.
Charlie Bell RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16 |
zylphryx |
I wish for more time to run more pbps.
Wish granted. You find a lottery ticket on the ground and when you check, the numbers match last nights drawing for eleventy billion dollars. Overjoyed, you quickly head into work and quit, in the process telling off your boss and burning all possible bridges.
When you drive to your state's main lottery center, you find out the ticket was for the previous night's drawing and you are now unemployed and have plenty of time to run more pbps.
I wish the world was flat.
Charlie Bell RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16 |
Sissyl |
Wish granted. You turn into eleven years old with a grown-up mind. Moreover, you are given the gift of not aging. Thus, you can now enjoy being forbidden everything grown-ups do, being forced into school (your old school has a place for you and everything), and being beaten by bigger kids... forever. Oh, and nobody pays your bills.
I wish to be a goddess.
Sissyl |
Wish granted. You are thrown into jail, where your total expenses for living are around $2 a month, which you handily earn by washing laundry. You also have massive free time, far and away enough to play the adventure paths, but sadly, gaming books are not allowed through prison censorship so you can't actually play...
I wish there were real elves.
Charlie Bell RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16 |