Deep 6 FaWtL


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OK, I'll admit. Sometimes showing off to set expectations of me through the moon backfires.

This morning:'
Manager: I have an urgent assignment: You need to pass this certification exam today to be able to take some training (ironically, on our AI stuff) in August.
NH: OK. Send me the links.

So, I took the 3.5-hour training course, got bored halfway through, and jumped straight to the one-hour exam. Raced through it in about 12 minutes and got a 93% (65% is passing).

Sent the results to my manager.
"Great."

So yeah, she just expected it. Didn't even lift an eyebrow. And that's the level I've set for myself. *SIGH*

EDIT: And yes, the "no personal items" rules for the exam were pretty strict...


Hey, maybe your company could create a social media platform that would focus on allowing people to keep in touch with friends and acquaintances all over the world in direct competition to Facebook?

At least then, we could hope for some level of competence among their staff...


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NobodysHome wrote:

OK, I'll admit. Sometimes showing off to set expectations of me through the moon backfires.

This morning:'
Manager: I have an urgent assignment: You need to pass this certification exam today to be able to take some training (ironically, on our AI stuff) in August.
NH: OK. Send me the links.

So, I took the 3.5-hour training course, got bored halfway through, and jumped straight to the one-hour exam. Raced through it in about 12 minutes and got a 93% (65% is passing).

Sent the results to my manager.
"Great."

So yeah, she just expected it. Didn't even lift an eyebrow. And that's the level I've set for myself. *SIGH*

EDIT: And yes, the "no personal items" rules for the exam were pretty strict...

Well, you could have been hiding cheat sheets under your clothes...


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Drejk wrote:

Hey, maybe your company could create a social media platform that would focus on allowing people to keep in touch with friends and acquaintances all over the world in direct competition to Facebook?

At least then, we could hope for some level of competence among their staff...

My company's founder's favorite saying is, "If you're copying the competition, you've already lost."

It's made for some really innovative decisions, and some really, really, REALLY stupid ones. But it definitely means we're not going to try to build a social media platform.


What if you built one out of boards. That would be new. Just don’t build it in a tree. That has been done before.


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Waterhammer wrote:
What if you built one out of boards. That would be new. Just don’t build it in a tree. That has been done before.

Or we could use the boards to build a giant wooden rabbit. Then, once the French have taken it inside, Lancelot, Galahad, and I will jump out...

Maybe a giant wooden badger instead.


This morning I told the Front Desk Supervisor, to her face, that we needed laundry sanitizer. She said she would get some. I come in tonight, and guess what? No sanitizer. And everything has been washed without it. Not my problem, I guess.

Also, 2nd shift told me that she had 1/2 of it folded. There were 3 bins worth total. About 1/3 of one bin had been folded. And you know what? Based on past experience with her, I find it very likely that she believes that 1/9 of the job is equal to her half.


What kind of martial art does a deer know? Tae Kwan Doe.


My wife tried to get me to drink her hot beverage. I said "No thanks, that's not my cup of tea."


I'm going to spoiler this one, it's a bit risqué:

Spoiler:

Patrick and Colleen were getting hot and heavy in Patrick's van. Colleen, feeling adventurous, told Patrick "Oh, whip me! Whip me!" Patrick, having nothing else to whip her with, went outside and pulled the antenna off his van. After a bit, they both collapsed, exhausted and thoroughly satisfied. A week later, Colleen noticed that the whip marks hadn't healed, and were in fact turning an alarming shade of red. So she went to her doctor. He asked what caused the marks, so, a bit embarrassed, she told him what had happened. The doctor nodded, and said "I thought so. This is the worst case of van-aerial disease I've ever seen."


OK. Some people love male cats for this. I am not one of those people.

(Cleaning person arrives)

Lenore: Panics even though she's outside in the catio. Insists on being brought in. Sprints to hide in WhimseyShire.

Morrigan: Gets carried inside. Sprints to hide in WhimseyShire.

Meatball: Wanders inside on his own, wondering what's going on. Harasses the new person for pets. Attacks the broom because it's in his territory. Attacks the vacuum cleaner because it's in his territory. Flops over and demands more pets.

So it's pretty much, "Attack anything you don't understand, then demand belly rubs for your good job."
I know many, many people who would admire that approach to life.


Quote:
... something-something about male cats... belly rubs...

He likes belly rubs?! And not in "watch my belly, but do not touch!" way?!


Drejk wrote:
Quote:
... something-something about male cats... belly rubs...
He likes belly rubs?! And not in "watch my belly, but do not touch!" way?!

OMG. Most of the time a cat's belly is like a Venus fly trap -- they roll over, expose it, and if you put your hand on it your hand is now their favorite chew toy.

But nope, Meatball is happy to have his belly rubbed without the biting.


NobodysHome wrote:
Drejk wrote:
Quote:
... something-something about male cats... belly rubs...
He likes belly rubs?! And not in "watch my belly, but do not touch!" way?!

OMG. Most of the time a cat's belly is like a Venus fly trap -- they roll over, expose it, and if you put your hand on it your hand is now their favorite chew toy.

But nope, Meatball is happy to have his belly rubbed without the biting.

Damn the extra $250 visa costs they introduced recently!


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Drejk wrote:
NobodysHome wrote:
Drejk wrote:
Quote:
... something-something about male cats... belly rubs...
He likes belly rubs?! And not in "watch my belly, but do not touch!" way?!

OMG. Most of the time a cat's belly is like a Venus fly trap -- they roll over, expose it, and if you put your hand on it your hand is now their favorite chew toy.

But nope, Meatball is happy to have his belly rubbed without the biting.

Damn the extra $250 visa costs they introduced recently!

I'm not even going to spoiler this: If you are not a U.S. citizen, do not visit the United States right now. It is indeed that bad.


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NobodysHome wrote:
Drejk wrote:
NobodysHome wrote:
Drejk wrote:
Quote:
... something-something about male cats... belly rubs...
He likes belly rubs?! And not in "watch my belly, but do not touch!" way?!

OMG. Most of the time a cat's belly is like a Venus fly trap -- they roll over, expose it, and if you put your hand on it your hand is now their favorite chew toy.

But nope, Meatball is happy to have his belly rubbed without the biting.

Damn the extra $250 visa costs they introduced recently!
I'm not even going to spoiler this: If you are not a U.S. citizen, do not visit the United States right now. It is indeed that bad.

Yup. I know. I tried to be more subtle.

Now I feel cunningly subtle... Or subtly cunning...


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What do Canadian Borg say?

Resistance would be impolite. Please wait to be assimilated. Pour l'assimilation en Francais, veuillez appuyer le "2".


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What do Ferengi Borg say?

Resistance is negotiable.


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Data: "Knock knock"
Geordie: "Who's there?"
Data: "Hike."
Geordie: "Hike who?"
Data: "Gullible Geordie. Data waits for the setup. The trap has been sprung."


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Did you know that actor Ricardo Montalban struggled to find work after starring in Star Trek 2? Yeah, apparently not many people are willing to hire an ex-Khan.


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I've been dabbling in mad science lately. My most recent project has been to combine a cobra with a boomerang. I'm pretty sure it's going to come back to bite me.


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Need a fun project for the weekend? Try this. Go to various thrift shops, antique stores, yard sales, etc... until you find a creepy-looking doll, preferably female in a Victorian dress. Take it home. Write a note that says "She's your problem now", attach it to said doll, then (anonymously) leave it at the door of the neighbor you hate. Bonus points if they are very superstitious, religious, and/or hate horror movies.


Huh... Apparently Wuchang: Fallen Feathers is a very good Souls-like game.

Welp, I already had it on a wishlist, and it is being release today so it will be forever until it hits a sale...


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Grumpy Old Man's Bizarre Tirade of the Day: Answering Machines

So, maybe it's because I predate mobile phones, caller ID, and even the common use of answering machines, but people's indignant, absolute refusal to use them baffles me. Even before text messaging became a standard of communication, people's attitude was (quite literally, as I've heard at least two people say this nearly verbatim), "Well, if you can't be bothered to pick up, then I can't be bothered to leave a message."

Erm... you do realize that answering machines are typically for when I can't pick up, right?

Yes, yes, I know. People started using answering machines as a way to screen their calls, so whenever you called you always got the answering machine and you started wondering whether or not the person was actually your friend, or whether they were screening you out. But with the advent of Caller ID, that's no longer an issue; they know whether or not it's you well before you leave a message.

So the whole, "I'm calling my friend but I got their answering machine so I'm not going to leave a message," baffles me.


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If you didn't leave a message, then it wasn't important and I'm not calling you back.


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On the other hand, speaking of things that make the world a better place, the kittens now have their routine:

4:00 am: Get up with NobodysHome, have breakfast, and play in the living room.

7:00 am: When NobodysHome wakes up GothBard, tumble into the room, clamber onto the bed, and say, "Good morning!" to her. Occasionally Meatball fails at this, waddles in at 6:30, and goes to sleep across her neck purring like a madman. This makes getting up, erm, difficult for her.

7:30 am: Have second breakfasts, play a little more, then migrate into WhimseyShire and sleep on Impus Major for another couple of hours.

My family has started to love mornings.


On the phone nonsense: Be it resolved! :)

I'm a young crone, and that nonsense drives me crazy too, although I've never had anyone complain about being expected to leave a message, at least.

As to kittens, it turns out I have allergies, so apart from an all too brief, shining moment, when I was six, I have never had a cat. :(

Getting a bit better at being a plant mum, though. One of my recently transplanted babies that I thought wouldn't make it seems to be bouncing back, slowly. Probably a bit cramped in a crowded planter.


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NobodysHome wrote:

Grumpy Old Man's Bizarre Tirade of the Day: Answering Machines

So, maybe it's because I predate mobile phones, caller ID, and even the common use of answering machines, but people's indignant, absolute refusal to use them baffles me. Even before text messaging became a standard of communication, people's attitude was (quite literally, as I've heard at least two people say this nearly verbatim), "Well, if you can't be bothered to pick up, then I can't be bothered to leave a message."

Erm... you do realize that answering machines are typically for when I can't pick up, right?

Yes, yes, I know. People started using answering machines as a way to screen their calls, so whenever you called you always got the answering machine and you started wondering whether or not the person was actually your friend, or whether they were screening you out. But with the advent of Caller ID, that's no longer an issue; they know whether or not it's you well before you leave a message.

So the whole, "I'm calling my friend but I got their answering machine so I'm not going to leave a message," baffles me.

You lost me on calling someone on the phone.

If I wanted to contact you, I'd send a message.


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- Squeakio, it is 4am!

- Ave, Sneakius, it is! The trumpets blare; the crowds filling the Colisseum howl in anticipation, and we poor Cattivellani, captured during the Legions unstoppable march to the very ends of the earth, must now take part in the SCAMPERUS MAXIMUS!

- The SCAMPERUS MAXIMUS! A hurricane-fast foot-race, under the bed, up the walls, down the stairs, back up the stairs, then over Limey's face (several times), followed by vicious hand-to-hand combat, our martial cries echoing off the arena walls.

Liberty's Edge

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My voicemail message is a limerick. People are generally amused by it, and are therefore more likely to leave a message. It has happened only once that the caller couldn't stop laughing long enough to leave a message.


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Vanykrye wrote:
If you didn't leave a message, then it wasn't important and I'm not calling you back.

If it’s important I do leave a message. If it’s just a social call I usually don’t.

I have my text alert turned off. If someone texts me I see it eventually. I turned the text alert off the first time one woke me up from sleep. Turned the government alerts off the first time an Amber Alert woke me up. I do realize that means I might not survive a disaster, due to getting uninterrupted sleep. Worth it.


A bit more about social platforms made of wood. Paint it white, raise the platform, add a cupola, and you have a gazebo. Which also has been done.


Waterhammer wrote:
A bit more about social platforms made of wood. Paint it white, raise the platform, add a cupola, and you have a gazebo. Which also has been done.

A GAZEBO?!?! WHERE!?!? AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Sorry. I get nervous around gazebos ever since The Incident.


Anybody else want to go on to one of those cooking competition shows like Chopped and simply take the "secret ingredients", stick them in a bowl, microwave them for 10 minutes, and then serve?

Just me?


You know, failing is pretty bad, but it's even worse when you don't take anyone else down with you.


I'm so tired.


gran rey de los mono wrote:
Waterhammer wrote:
A bit more about social platforms made of wood. Paint it white, raise the platform, add a cupola, and you have a gazebo. Which also has been done.

A GAZEBO?!?! WHERE!?!? AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Sorry. I get nervous around gazebos ever since The Incident.

HRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM....

I HUNGER. RUN, COWARD! RUN!!


Scintillae wrote:
I'm so tired.

Hi, So Tired. I'm gran rey.


Its hot today and will be well over 90 tomorrow.


Freehold DM wrote:
Its hot today and will be well over 90 tomorrow.

We won't see the north side of 70°F before Sunday. We may see the sun some afternoons...


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Sweet Jesus, the reaper has been busy this week.


To add insult to the injury, Steam suddenly doesn't accept PayPal (specifically) payments, so I can't get a game on a sale that I - after watching a review or two - decided to buy.

And no, I was not convinced by the game's shameless fan service. It was combination of promising combat system and being 88% off...

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