
Freehold DM |

So either I'm not familiar with the right people and therefore need to go meet more or just need to be a hermit.
And one of those options doesn't require the minefield of "It's ok to be yourself...as long as you do everything peer pressure demands."
I vote for getting familiar with the right people more. Our jobs can sometimes influence our social lives in a negative fashion. As important as it is to operate outside of our comfort zone socially and even learn from them(the second job has taught me so much about night clubs, who they appeal to and why!!!!), it's going to be quite impossible to do so without a strong network of the "right" people behind you.

Scintillae |

Scintillae wrote:I vote for getting familiar with the right people more. Our jobs can sometimes influence our social lives in a negative fashion. As important as it is to operate outside of our comfort zone socially and even learn from them(the second job has taught me so much about night clubs, who they appeal to and why!!!!), it's going to be quite impossible to do so without a strong network of the "right" people behind you.So either I'm not familiar with the right people and therefore need to go meet more or just need to be a hermit.
And one of those options doesn't require the minefield of "It's ok to be yourself...as long as you do everything peer pressure demands."
Maybe. I'm honestly not all that unhappy with my situation (except for the job thing, that'd be nice to fix), just frustrated with the fact that I'm apparently having badwrongfun.

Bitter Thorn |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |

This is probably obnoxious, but I sometime have to remind young people that I care about that most of the people in their "peer" group who use disapproval and fear to manipulate them are in fact ass bags who are entirely unworthy of the amount of energy they are wasting on them.
In short, many people are ass bags, and they don't merit the effort to impress them.

Freehold DM |

I guess I've just had the "But you're old enough to drink, why don't you" conversation too often with friends and family. I note they never ask why I don't smoke, and it only took years to get them to stop asking why I don't date. So why does "Because I don't want to" work on everything but drinking? I'm not stopping them from doing it.
Alcohol is one of those things that you have to experiment with to find the right drink for you. I didn't get into beer too much in my twenties because I really don't like beer unless it's japanese in origin(I found that out when my dad gave me a taste as a kid). I discovered that I liked wine and mixed drinks after a time, and I'm still working on my preferred beverage.

Freehold DM |

Scintillae wrote:I guess I've just had the "But you're old enough to drink, why don't you" conversation too often with friends and family. I note they never ask why I don't smoke, and it only took years to get them to stop asking why I don't date. So why does "Because I don't want to" work on everything but drinking? I'm not stopping them from doing it.I find that drinkers want others to drink. Kind of like how people having kids want others to procreate. Or sports fans insist you get as fired up about their hobby as they do. It's the herd instinct. And I think the fact that you reject their 'fun' disquiets them somehow, and makes their choices seem suboptimal.
This.Although it's true of anything, even gaming.

Freehold DM |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |

Scintillae wrote:I guess I've just had the "But you're old enough to drink, why don't you" conversation too often with friends and family. I note they never ask why I don't smoke, and it only took years to get them to stop asking why I don't date. So why does "Because I don't want to" work on everything but drinking? I'm not stopping them from doing it.Beats me. Tim's wife is a tea totaler, and Diane rarely drinks anymore so we have DDs.
Blessed be the DDs! :)
So....lack of drinking results in large breasts? I don't understand.

Patrick Curtin |

Patrick Curtin wrote:This.Although it's true of anything, even gaming.Scintillae wrote:I guess I've just had the "But you're old enough to drink, why don't you" conversation too often with friends and family. I note they never ask why I don't smoke, and it only took years to get them to stop asking why I don't date. So why does "Because I don't want to" work on everything but drinking? I'm not stopping them from doing it.I find that drinkers want others to drink. Kind of like how people having kids want others to procreate. Or sports fans insist you get as fired up about their hobby as they do. It's the herd instinct. And I think the fact that you reject their 'fun' disquiets them somehow, and makes their choices seem suboptimal.
Which is why I steer clear of game design threads.

Bitter Thorn |

Bitter Thorn wrote:She was dressed to kill too, but I could tell it was a struggle for her to find clothes. Her makeup was AWESOME, I should have told her as much.Freehold DM wrote:I also met a woman who was easily 6'6".Wow!
I reckon it's a challenge to find a little black dress when one is 6'6".

Freehold DM |

This is probably obnoxious, but I sometime have to remind young people that I care about that most of the people in their "peer" group who use disapproval and fear to manipulate them are in fact ass bags who are entirely unworthy of the amount of energy they are wasting on them.
In short, many people are ass bags, and they don't merit the effort to impress them.
That's true of any age group though. But it's most obvious/exacerbated with the young.

Patrick Curtin |
2 people marked this as a favorite. |

This is probably obnoxious, but I sometime have to remind young people that I care about that most of the people in their "peer" group who use disapproval and fear to manipulate them are in fact ass bags who are entirely unworthy of the amount of energy they are wasting on them.
In short, many people are ass bags, and they don't merit the effort to impress them.
Amen. And as someone who has sailed through the seas of trying to pretend to be otherwise to impress/be social/be popular I'd advise against. I am a gaming nerd hermit. I prefer it that way, and I really don't wish to change. I don't want a huge coterie of friends, but I am happy enough to have a few core ones I can trust and a wife who feels much the same I do. I have sadly discovered that most of the people I interact with I'd rather NOT be friends with. I am content with my own company, and the occasional outing (like today) which is the exception, not the rule.

The Thing from Beyond the Edge |

Freehold DM |

Freehold DM wrote:Patrick Curtin wrote:This.Although it's true of anything, even gaming.Scintillae wrote:I guess I've just had the "But you're old enough to drink, why don't you" conversation too often with friends and family. I note they never ask why I don't smoke, and it only took years to get them to stop asking why I don't date. So why does "Because I don't want to" work on everything but drinking? I'm not stopping them from doing it.I find that drinkers want others to drink. Kind of like how people having kids want others to procreate. Or sports fans insist you get as fired up about their hobby as they do. It's the herd instinct. And I think the fact that you reject their 'fun' disquiets them somehow, and makes their choices seem suboptimal.Which is why I steer clear of game design threads.
Fair enough.

Bitter Thorn |
3 people marked this as a favorite. |

Bitter Thorn wrote:It is. But it's still important. We all need friends.Scintillae wrote:I simply think I'd be a very bad candidate for successfully molding a human with my genetics into something socially acceptable.Socially acceptable is vastly over rated.
I have found in my life that I don't need to be socially acceptable to have deep and profound friendships. I simply need to be a good and loyal friend.
Of course I hold much of society in contempt so its approval holds very little appeal for me.

Freehold DM |

Freehold DM wrote:I reckon it's a challenge to find a little black dress when one is 6'6".Bitter Thorn wrote:She was dressed to kill too, but I could tell it was a struggle for her to find clothes. Her makeup was AWESOME, I should have told her as much.Freehold DM wrote:I also met a woman who was easily 6'6".Wow!
Still, she was smokin' man. Full, deep red lips and eyes that betrayed an inner vulnerability. I could tell she felt a bit awkward, I should have flirted with her a bit, it might have made her feel comfortable.

Bitter Thorn |

Freehold DM |

Freehold DM wrote:Bitter Thorn wrote:It is. But it's still important. We all need friends.Scintillae wrote:I simply think I'd be a very bad candidate for successfully molding a human with my genetics into something socially acceptable.Socially acceptable is vastly over rated.I have found in my life that I don't need to be socially acceptable to have deep and profound friendships. I simply need to be a good and loyal friend.
Of course I hold much of society in contempt so its approval holds very little appeal for me.
Well, when I say "socially acceptable" I was more referring to basic social norms. My day job colours my view of what socially acceptable is, as I work with people who have had to spend years learning what is and isn't acceptable and sometimes need gentle reminders.

![]() |

Bitter Thorn wrote:Yes welcome back from the abyss of the Real World. How goes it?Crimson Jester wrote:Not that I coudl make a better one.Howdy CJ!
It goes, I do not know how, but it goes.
As soon as I can get my own set of wheels the wife will finallize her moving out. She spent the night "with a girl friend, doing a slumber party" but is so evasive as to who she was with, I am sure it is the new room mate but am less sure it is female. She has been approved for an apartment but basically blames me for not haveing a new car yet. Oh and then had me pay for maintenance of the one she is planning on leaving with.
So I should have internet again shortly jsut saving money for a vehicle first.

Bitter Thorn |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |

Bitter Thorn wrote:That's true of any age group though. But it's most obvious/exacerbated with the young.This is probably obnoxious, but I sometime have to remind young people that I care about that most of the people in their "peer" group who use disapproval and fear to manipulate them are in fact ass bags who are entirely unworthy of the amount of energy they are wasting on them.
In short, many people are ass bags, and they don't merit the effort to impress them.
It's very hard to imagine when one is in high school how irrelevant high school really is.

Patrick Curtin |

Patrick Curtin wrote:Bitter Thorn wrote:Yes welcome back from the abyss of the Real World. How goes it?Crimson Jester wrote:Not that I coudl make a better one.Howdy CJ!It goes, I do not know how, but it goes.
** spoiler omitted **
So I should have internet again shortly jsut saving money for a vehicle first.
Sorry to hear that CJ. I have unfortunately been in a similar situation, as I am sure we have discussed before. Stay strong, and remember that karma ALWAYS gets her due.