The Haiku Game


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No silver arrows!
No bronzeshod spears or gold ax?
This shop sucks roc eggs


This shop sucks roc eggs
That's what we get for casting
Animate object


Animate object
Replicant cyborg lovedoll
Watch for live wire


Watch for Live Wire
It's on after Looks That Kill
Oh, the metal days


Oh, the metal days
Before all of this plastic
The world is plastic

Liberty's Edge

The world is plastic
Like Barbie's bounteous bust
It's beyond all Ken

Sovereign Court

It's beyond all ken
the sadness I see in the
fish head's shriveled eye

fish head's shrivled eye
stares through cloudy broth. I hate
food that looks at me

Liberty's Edge

Food that looks at me
Tastes better when it's twitching
Such rarified tastes


Such rarified tastes
Blood congealing on the plate
Bread to soak the juice

Liberty's Edge

Bread to soak the juice
That's the point of a French Dip
Savor every bite

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16

Savor every bite
Delicious, sinister thrills
Succubus nibbles


Succubus nibbles
Ohhhh, I thought you said... dear me
My ears are possessed!

Liberty's Edge

My ears are possessed
The sound of rattling dice
Reverberating


Reverberating
A chamber built for echoes
Neat eat eat eat eat

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16

"Neat eat eat eat eat?"
Srsly WTF dude?
That's how these threads die.


"That's how these threads die"
Said some half crazed madwoman
Choking her yarn ball

Liberty's Edge

Choking on her yarn ball
Catwoman was neutralized
The furniture's safe


The furniture's safe
Tucked neatly 'neath the floorboards
Though I miss my couch


Though I miss my couch
Not as much as my love seat
I'm a romantic

Liberty's Edge

I'm a romantic
"What I Like About You" is
My source of income

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16

My source of income
Requires attack rolls and saves,
Not Profession checks.


Knot profession Czechs
Wrapped up the Prague Rodeo
Ropin' n' Ridin'


Ropin' n' Ridin'
Is a poor philosophy
For genteel first dates

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16

For genteel first dates
A lady never kisses
...the gentleman's [bleep]!

Spoiler:
@drunken_nomad: APPLAUSE


The gentleman's bleep
Made the headlines in ol' Greece
Got caught in a sheep

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16

Got caught in a sheep...
Ha! Why do Scotsmen wear kilts?
Sheep can hear zippers!


Sheep can hear zippers!
Apes can wear ruby slippers!
Seals can bare flippers!

Liberty's Edge

Seals can bare flippers
Whenever they're out clubbing
The polar bears all!


The polar bear's all
outta whack in the machine
gimme my quarter


Gimme my quarter
Your dog looks pleased with my work
And I need bus fare


Oh, so I guess I'm the only one who's ever pleasured dogs for quarters down at the bus station? Snobs!

And I need bus fare
If I don't get out of Dodge
They'll pelt me with balls

Scarab Sages

Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Maps, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

They'll pelt me with balls
Big round steel one with many spikes
Piercing bludgeoning.

Shadow Lodge

Piercing Bludgeoning,
I'm listing the damage types.
Slashing, Divine, and...


Slashing, Divine, and...
Your dress is just fabulous
You are fierce, sister!

Liberty's Edge

"You are fierce, sister!"
Said the Fury to her twin.
"Duh," was her reply.


"Duh," was her reply
On the job application
When asked for her sex


When asked for her sex
She detached King Missile-style
And went to SoHo


And went to SoHo
To join forces with Lobo
Looks like a no go

Liberty's Edge

Looks like a "no go"
If the sale is a "BO GO"
My stick's a Pogo


My stick's a Pogo
Like to scarf down dem Ho-Ho's
Tastes just like cocoa


Tastes just like cocoa
My bank roll drew the Po Po
Bittersweet no no

Liberty's Edge

Bittersweet "No, no..."
Could turn into a "YES! YES!"
Just try this new pill!


Just try this new pill!
It makes you larger and small
What the Dormouse said

Scarab Sages

Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Maps, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

"What the Dormouse Said"
A line from "White Rabbit" by
Jefferson Airplane

Liberty's Edge

Jefferson airplane?!
HA! Back in my day it was
Jefferson Balloon!


Jefferson Balloon!
He watched the Mongolfier
Take off in Paris

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16

"Take Off in Paris"
Name for a stewardess-themed
Strip club at de Gaulle

commentary:
@Cuchulainn: golfclap

Liberty's Edge

Strip club at de Gaulle
Bears the flensing enhancement
A sadistic swing

Takes a bow. Thanks, Charlie!


A sadistic swing
Sentient playground equipment
In the works of King

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