MASTER'S PERFECT GOLDEN BELL
Aura strong abjuration; CL 15th
Slot - ; Price 30,000 gp; Weight 10 lb.
This lustrous golden bell produces a deep and resonant ring which vibrates in perfect harmony with the material plane and destructively interferes with otherworldly beings. Once rung, its vibrations produce a 30-ft.-radius emanation affecting creatures with the Extraplanar subtype, reducing by 10 any damage reduction and/or spell resistance such creatures possess while within the emanation. The bell is without clapper and can only be rung by an unarmed strike from mortal flesh, sounding each time for a number of rounds equal to the bell ringer's unarmed strike damage, for a maximum of 10 rounds per day. These rounds need not be consecutive, but the bell cannot be silenced prematurely once rung.
The master created the first bell to ward his village against the monsters from beyond, and for millennia it tolled the defeat of enemies of the natural order across Vudra. But the master would wince at its glorious sound - some say guilty in the knowledge that one day it could be un-rung.
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, banishment; Cost 15,000 gp
I like this, too. And I like the monk angle. I just dont know about the 10 to DR and SR. I'd be much more comfortable with 5.
I want to hear Sean's thoughts.
That said, this is a fun and inspired item with a good deal of mojo, and you know what I think about mojo...its mandatory.
I'm iffy on the numbers but the concept is cool enough that I want to see what else this person can do.
Keep.
Contributor, RPG Superstar 2008 Top 4
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In the interest of professional honesty, I must recuse myself from commenting on this item, as I have prior knowledge of both the submitter and the item in question. As it stands, I can only say that I GREATLY look forward to seeing more from Matthew in the following rounds!
On a personal note, I'd like to add that Matt has been a close friend of mine since about 4th grade, and I was the best man in his wedding; obviously, I think that his writing is truly Superstar quality, or I would not have encouraged him so strongly to enter the competition.
I'm impressed by his execution of this item, which I saw in a very early stage of editorial development, and I look forward to the moment when he discovers that he was chosen for this competition.
Congratulations, Matt!
aka Robert G. McCreary
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Hmmm, interesting idea, though it goes a bit overboard on the Oriental/monk flavor. And there's that pesky backstory popping up again. But a unique effect - I don't think I've ever seen anything that reduces DR and SR before, and the flavor to explain those mechanics is spot-on. I'd really like it if its use wasn't so restricted. Requiring a mortal unarmed strike to activate it means that the bad guys can't use it against the PCs when they go plane-hopping (which they could do otherwise, since this thing targets the extraplanar subtype, not outsiders). I think that would have added a little something extra to the design - let both the PCs and the monsters use it.
I also think the numbers are too high. Reducing DR by 10 means you've just completely emasculated a major defense of the vast majority of SRD demons and devils (only the balor and pit fiend get to keep a little DR by my reckoning). Like Clark, I'd be more comforaable with 5.
I'd prefer a less flowery name, but great job! Congratulations on joining the ranks of RPG Superstar!
Contributor, RPG Superstar 2008 Top 4, Legendary Games
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Congratulations on making it into RPG Superstar 2009!
I pretty much love the item, except that like Rob, Clark, and the others I think the SR/DR hit is too big, especially for an effect with no save. I mean, other effects like this in the game have some form of defense. Assay spell resistance doesn't, but applies only to your own spells. Lower spell resistance gives a save to negate (and takes 1 full round to cast). Seems like there is a magic weapon out there that ablates SR at a rate of 1 point per hit (requiring you to hit multiple times to make much difference), and another spell I can't remember that reduces DR for outsiders (name escapes me; maybe it's baatezu blight or something from one of the Fiendish Codex books).
Anyway, the point being that for a big area-effect irresistible SR/DR reduction that does no harm to PCs, that is hardcore sh** and it should be a lot more expensive. I have no problem with it being a material-plane only item and outsiders/extraplanars can suck it, but PCs should be prepared that the devils and genies and angels and proteans may have created their own versions of this little winner the next time they wander off the safe confines of the Prime Material.
That said, the flavor is great, the activation method and duration are unique and interesting, and if the SR/DR hit were reduced to 5 I think it would be just about perfect. The name is solid - don't love it, don't hate it - and the extraneous backstory was unnecessary, but I think in this case the author had perfect economy of words with the actual entry and had extra words to burn and figured "why not?"
Summary: Great item. Unique effect coupled very tightly to the established flavor text. It says what it does and it does what it says, in a clever and interesting way and with a cool and fun effect. It is way undercosted for its power, but that would be better fixed by knocking down the power level (to 5 points of SR/DR) than by upping the price. Excellent job - one of my favorites.
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Contributor, RPG Superstar
aka Leandra Christine Schneider
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Oh something oriental right there. I like the “nature’s force” angle very much and allowing only mortal flesh to ring the bell was several kinds of cool. Interesting effect and creative use of DR and SR countermeasures.
Positive
Coming up with a creative debuff mechanic.
Good and consistent style that is unique in the contest so far.
Clean formatting.
Negative
I can imagine several PCs trying to pull their blows when ringing the bell. Is that possible? I don’t think it is rules-wise, so this raises an eyebrow.
Reducing the SR by mighty 10 points is like saying that the creature loses the SR completely. It virtually adds 10 to a check that approximately needs an 11+ to succeed. It is different with secondary casters or especially high SR (for their CR) creatures, but most of the time it is like loosing the SR completely.
It’s a different thing with the DR since a few points still do something there.
After reviewing all other items:
It is a great item and unique to the contest. Although a little off on the value of the debuff, I still think it has the RPG Superstar vibe going for it!
Contributor, RPG Superstar 2008 Top 6
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Dedicated Voter Season 6
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Love the idea, but not the mechanics. Too cheap, too much DR/SR negated, and the way the duration is handled feels off to me. Still, novelty counts for a lot. This an item that could be easily tuned up in editing, and adds some nice options to the game.
Love the flavor, but as a DM, the reduction is too much. Also, as Christine said, can the striker pull their punch so as not to "over-use" the item? And changing it from Extra-Planar to Outsider so that on other worlds the PCs could be the affected would be a neat twist.
Ok, the numbers are iffy. But when I got the to part about what the item actually does, I thought "Ooooooooh! Of course it does!"
That's probably the mojo Clark mentions.
Top tier for me!
Congrats! Good one.
Another fix to the judges' concerns might be simply making it a bulkier bell that belongs in a bell tower. That would make it a defensive item for towns and such, which fits the item's flavor, rather than something adventurers carry around to defeat the DM's evil schemes. As a site-based item, it then suggests something about the setting: invasions from beyond have to be pretty common for a society to make these...
*cough* world wound! *cough*.
And, given the monk's ability to fall great distances without damage, it leads to a cool visual of the monk striking the bell then leaping out of the bell tower to fight the demonic horde in the village streets.
While the name is somewhat off to me ("Perfect"? Seriously?), the flavor text of the item sets everything right. It is a great idea, and would seriously entice a player to pick a monk in a campaign that focuses on the otherworldly threats.
It can serve as a killer item, but might become too crucial for the party for it's own good. With a bit of DM caution, this Bell could add a perfect flavor to certain adventures. Kudos! It's a very inventive item.
Last but not least, I like your "dressing" text and it's placement. Not obtrusive, and just the right amount!
I like this a lot.
Yo - (the thank you post)
Thank you to Paizo for putting on SuperStar - it is a hell of a lot of fun both to read and in which to participate, and a wonderful focus for the community.
Thank you to the judges and everyone else for your critiques and comments, I appreciate them greatly. The tradecraft constantly evident in these forums is humbling and quite impressive.
Most of all, thank you to my inspiration, he knows who he is; never have I envied a man so much as he who dared to chase a dream - and caught it.
Also huge shout-out to the motorcycle-riding GM whose Stephen-King-mythos-laden not-quite-Oriental Adventures campaign served as the inspiration for this item directly.
Best of luck to all other contestants, kudos to everyone who submitted and dreams the dream, and Game On!
All of the comments about the power level of the DR/SR reduction are well taken. There seems to be a clear consensus on what should be tweaked. Head nods from me on that part.
Yeah, super potent. But I honestly like it. The DR/SR of opponents sometimes cries out for an item like this to bring the odds back in the PCs' favor. I think it's an interesting mechanic to determine how long the ringing of the bell lasts from the amount of unarmed damage you do to it. That's something unique I haven't seen before. So, that shows some designer spark, I think. It'll be interesting to see what you do in future rounds. Congratulations on making the Top 32!
My two-cents,
--Neil
Master's Perfect Golden Bell is a good item, definitely wondrous. Well written. Nice mystical feel to it. The backstory annoys me a little.
Would have been one of the best without the unnecessary flowery stuff, I think. Hard to tell, since the cat's already out of that bag.
I really like this one too (of course my favorite is still Desna's Triptych) but I thought this one had something cool as well. I didn't think the DR/SR reduction was too much... but as pretty much everyone in the "know" thought so... I guess it should be tweaked to reflect that. Anyway... Congrats on making the top 32! Look forward to your villain. And as you said... Game On!
Regards,
Dean; the Minstrel Wyrm
Cool item. I like the oriental feel, although the "flavor text" line at the end was overkill, IMO. I like the way the effect works, though it ends up being a monk-specific item since it's based on unarmed strike damage. I also like the idea of it being a more bulky bell, though not set in a belltower, but on a cart which the monks push around.
I like the way the effect works, though it ends up being a monk-specific item since it's based on unarmed strike damage.
Well, that depends on whether or not you want to max out the bell with one activation for one encounter.
Sometimes it might be the best strategy to let the halfling hit it, instead... that way, you still have some mojo left over for the next room full of baddies. You can always hit it multiple times.
Heck, you could even train the druid's pet bird to peck the thing for a little 'ping', in a pinch. Mortal flesh is actually a pretty broad category, or so I thought.
Here's an interesting thought: if 20th level monks with Perfect Self are outsiders, is their flesh still 'mortal'? Come to think of it Perfect Self gives damage reduction too, and Diamond Soul gives spell resistance... man, if monks ever go off-world this bell could really come back to haunt them!
Oh yes, and congrats on making it to the top 32! I'm sure you're sick of hearing 'it should have been DR/SR -5' by now but I'll chime in (eh? eh?) and say I agree. Great writing though; I'm always a sucker for monkish goodness.
I have no mechanical points that haven't been made up-thread, so I'll just say I love the tone (*ahem*) of this one. The lack of a clapper. The description of the bell's sound. UNARMED STRIKE ACTIVATION. All of these things are awesome-flavored, even though simple. Or because they're simple. Very nice.
Congrats on Top 32!
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RPG Superstar 2013
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Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka Steven T. Helt
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Great item. Excited to see what you do in the next round.
Yours is the first item I commit to using in my upcoming Rokugan campaign. A giant version, settled on the Carpenter Wall and struck by Crab monks while shugenja rain down jade on the Shadowlands.
Thanks for that image. Mechanics are a little off as described by everyone else, but you know that now. Your idea is the most superstar so far, I think.
Yours is the first item I commit to using in my upcoming Rokugan campaign. A giant version, settled on the Carpenter Wall and struck by Crab monks while shugenja rain down jade on the Shadowlands.
This is the highest praise I could hope for; Thank You.
I'm very glad that folks have been enthusiastic about expanding "perfect golden bell" technology. When designing the bell as a wondrous item for submission in Round 1, I made the choice that the most all-around useful size of bell (from the perspective of your average adventuring party) would be the hand held version that you could feasibly carry around in a pack, lift with one hand, and ring with the other. (I also wanted to avoid classification as a minor artifact.) That said, I totally love and support larger bells - hauled on a cart, or hefted up in a belfry. Obviously the different sizes would merit different strengths of effect and radius, but I think that the basic mechanic is easily scalable.
Gotta love the Crab - those poor tough bastards need all the help they can get.
RPG Superstar 2008 Top 32, 2011 Top 16
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Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka JoelF847
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This is a great item, as others have said. Good job! The one thing I wished had been included instead of the backstory at the end was a way to stop the bell after a good solid hit got you 10 rounds and you only wanted 5. I understand that one ringing, it cannot be stopped, and by normal means that's a good call. On the other hand, I'd prefer a line or two about how silence and sculpt sound could end the ringing, both as a way the PCs could spend a little resources to save some of the bell's allotment for the day, and as a way for an affected outsider to have some way to stop that horrible perfect mortal ringing.
Looking forward to reading your villain.
I like this a lot, but I'm a sucker for Oriental-themed items, and I truly like the "mortal flesh" bit.
My take - I reduced the disruption effect to 5 points off of DR/SR, and only ringable once/day - but let monks expend ki to increase the effect:
If the bell-ringer expends one or more points of ki, the bell's radius increases by 5', its duration increases by 5 rounds, and the reduction it inflicts increases by 1, for each ki point.
So expending 3 ki points would cause the bell to reduce DR/SR by 8, in a 45' radius, for (15+damage) rounds.
At 10 lbs it's portable but awkward (heavier than a full gallon of milk). You wouldn't want to carry it one-handed for very long.
I'm considering also allowing it to be activated by being rubbed, like the Tibetian singing bowls - no maximum duration, but to maintain it each round you must expend a standard action that provokes AoOs, and it takes both hands (one to hold the bell's handle, one to rub the rim).
My take - I reduced the disruption effect to 5 points off of DR/SR, and only ringable once/day - but let monks expend ki to increase the effect:
If the bell-ringer expends one or more points of ki, the bell's radius increases by 5', its duration increases by 5 rounds, and the reduction it inflicts increases by 1, for each ki point.
I like this modification. It certainly makes the bell more of a monk item than it already is, but if that works for the campaign/PC/NPC that uses it, rock on. I think the investment of ki points is an awesome mechanic, and is totally in-theme. The scalability your mechanic allows is also very nice because it expands the effect without being solely based on damage dealt.
I gotta be honest, I don't want my bowl rubbed.
Very cool - I salute you.
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My take - I reduced the disruption effect to 5 points off of DR/SR, and only ringable once/day - but let monks expend ki to increase the effect:
If the bell-ringer expends one or more points of ki, the bell's radius increases by 5', its duration increases by 5 rounds, and the reduction it inflicts increases by 1, for each ki point.
I like this modification. It certainly makes the bell more of a monk item than it already is, but if that works for the campaign/PC/NPC that uses it, rock on. I think the investment of ki points is an awesome mechanic, and is totally in-theme. The scalability your mechanic allows is also very nice because it expands the effect without being solely based on damage dealt.
I gotta be honest, I don't want my bowl rubbed.
Very cool - I salute you.
I know this is a reply that might never get read, but, as it seems the DR10 and SR10 reduction are the main issues with this, why not try something like this:
Roll a D20 to strike the bell. The skill with which you strike the bell determines the power of the chime. What ever you roll, divide that number in half (round down) and apply that to the DR and SR reduction. That number will also set the maximum amount of creatures to be affected and the amount of rounds the effect lasts. So, a roll of 15 on a D20 will give DR7/SR7 reduction that will last 7 rounds and affect a maximum of 7 creatures.
This sets the maximum SR/DR reduction, duration, creatures affected to 10.
All other powers of the item listed by the OP stay the same.
And the Ki-power use listed above is another plus that I really liked. If a bad d20 roll occures, using the Ki could make it better. Having the maximums already set at 10 keeps it from getting out of hand.