Host:
"So you're..."
AFWAS:
"I'm a fighter with a sword."
Host:
Uhhh...yeah...do you have any special qualities?"
AFWAS:
"I'm a fighter with a sword."
Host:
"How did you come to be in the area?"
AFWAS:
"I was born here. Exciting, huh?"
Host:
"Well what sort of horrible dramatic trauma led you to picking up a sword?"
AFWAS:
"Well my parents named me A Fighter With A Sword...so we all figured it was logical that I take it up...so I practiced and got good enough to apply for adventures, I guess."
Host:
You're diction is, well..."
AFWAS:
It's just normal talk-no flowery Ren Fest BS...when I charge into battle, I yell, "I Am A Fighter With A Sword! And as you are the "(insert basic name of said monster of the encounter here)" I will attack you with the intention of killing you"...no words like "Slay" or "Smite Thee Foul Beast" nothing like that...I'm A Fighter With A Sword, and that's my function, it's who I am now, and it's who I'm gonna be. It's what I do."
Host:
"Do you work well with..."
AFWAS:
"You know, it doesn't really matter if you work well with others if you never get to play. I see a lot of these GMs saying how they love creativity, but then shoot down any effort to make an interesting character...or they Private Message you telling you they loved your backstory and then not put you on the list. It's tough when you just started online gaming...when you have no huge record of posts...seeing the same damned people get picked...winning a spot on one campaign, and then dotting another with an alias with their huge flowery posting backgrounds and Vanilla-flavored crybaby dramatic backstories...which if you analyzed one from another...really aren't that unique anyways. YES I work well with others...I could create the most Chaotic Neutralist uncaring asshat of a dude and still work well with others and the campaign story...IT"S THE POINT ISN"T IT?"
Host:
"Well...ok...ummmm...What First level fea..."
AFWAS:
"Toughness...because...well, you know, Hit Points!"
Host:
"What about trai..."
AFWAS:
"Traits...well that's the tricky part! Any trait I pick would have to add flavor to me...I guess I would have to consider them a necessary bit of tasty sprinkles on an otherwise Plain Yogurt type of guy. BUT NO DRAWBACKS! I'LL BE DAMNED IF I"M GONNA ADD ANYTHING I DON"T HAVE TO IN THAT AREA!"
I present to you A Fighter With A Sword...he's a fighter with a sword.
