Ra, Alien Overlord's page

Just don't let them take me again

I keep telling you, we've already reached the limits of what anal probing can teach us! Stop calling, it's getting a little weird!

Merry Day before we obliterate earth to build a Starbucks Christmas!

Enjoy it! It'll be your last!!

Damn it, I said the loud part quiet and the quiet part loud!

Worked for me!

Vote Ra! Flying Pyramids with death rays to my first thousand disciples! Kittens for everyone else!

Elect Ra, in 2016!

Kittens and oppressive slavery for all!!

We appreciate all you do for us, more kittens for the dragon!

They're just showing off!

You should see the Intergalactic Westminster Island Show.

They're truly silly creatures.

It doesn't matter who you vote for, you're all doomed! Doomed I say!

Back off buddy, I've been working these chumps for thousands of years, my kitty minions are this close to taking over.

We've learned all we can from rectal probing.

please stop trying to volunteer!!

Job site was burglarized last night, but there were some anomalies:

1. The only things stolen were a stack of pallets and the key to one of the excavators.

2. Every single deadbolt lock on every single storage unit was hideously mangled (to the point where most of the locks had to be cut out of the doors before being replaced), but they'd taken the time to carefully close all the doors.

3. A number of the stainless steel cylinder locking tabs on the deadbolts were twisted like corkscrews, something that a) I couldn't accomplish with a pair of pliers, a pry bar, and a vise, and b) could only have been done from the inside of each of the locked units.

We may be dealing with an alien entity of some kind.

It wasn't me! I swear! I was in New Mexico, probing crackpots for money.

Or, as you earthlings call it, DVD's of Gigli, fools! You practically give it away!

Tin Foil Yamakah wrote:

Freehold DM wrote:

thank god. Can't afford to lose you.

We can rebuild him

WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY.

You're welcome, by the way.

Ra, Alien Overlord wrote:

And yet, you'll build pyramids at the drop of a hat.

Squishy humans, you'll believe anything!

Hey, now, just because it's worked in, like, fourteen different human civilizations, doesn't mean it'll work again!

Fool us fourteen times, shame on you. Fool us twenty-five times...

C'mon! You know you want to, just look at how square they are, and look the blocks roll along on logs, they practically build themselves.

And yet, you'll build pyramids at the drop of a hat.

Squishy humans, you'll believe anything!

Cats make the best propagandists, no one ever says no to a cat.

Oh Lord.

You rang!

Sorry I had to put down a rebellion thru one of our Stargates, Oh! Damn it! There's another one, I'll be right back.

I'm personally a big fan of the Egyptian Miniseries, those pyramids will never fly without the right engines.

Hilarious I tell you!

Sasquatch make better slaves, docile natures, vegetarian and hard working, I'm surprised you haven't met any... oh, right.

Ugh! Don't get me started on Stargates, way more trouble than they're worth.

Sorry my bad! They asked me "how do we evolve teeth!" All I said was "you know who's already got teeth..."

I've never been back there

It's time to kiss your planet goodbye! Mwahaha-..... sorry! Wrong planet, my mistake, we'll be back later!

Just so we're clear tho, we don't probe for science, we probe for the sheer joy of probing!

Please! We use Twitter now!

We have no reason to kidnap a far superior species such as the badgers

The League of Cliche Villainy also pledges use of our Death Ray, it might take awhile for it to come online however, and that's also assuming those goddamn Hardy Boys stay out of the way....

there are entirely too many alien entities on this forum!

StrangePackage wrote:

25a Like all good Desnans, it was where your feet took you.

25b Like all good Toragdans, it is where your duty lays.
25c Like all good Iomedaeans, it is where you are most needed
25d Like all good Caydenites, on a dare.

25d.5 Like all good Caydenites, you have no idea how you got here, or where this tattoo came from.

Yes! its really best you not find out, it could..... complicate some of our.... goals

I'll be their God and help them rebuild their civilization then tear it down and watch it burn!..... Err, i mean give everyone Fluffy Kittens and Twitter!

#Rawillnotdestroyearthpinkyswear;)

There better not be a Violent Insurrection without me!

you shall all kneel before me! No matter what your political affliation may be!

Distant Worlds Invasion! Don't say we didn't warn you!

Good! Good!

A slap on the wrist that would turn probably 50% of Golarions population into chunky salsa

I LIKE CHUNKY SALSA!

it says you will all be crushed beneath my feet!, also i like kittens

Humans! so Squishy, they go Splat so easily!

The Egyptians were easier to keep in line then these slackers.
i guess i know which country is the first to be overthrown in the next invasion! well maybe the second after Switzerland.....

I WOULD LIKE AN ADVENTURE PATH WHERE WE INVADE AND DESTROY YOUR PATHETIC WORLD OF GOLARION AND THEN ONWARD TO EARTH!!!!!! THAT ORSON WELLES IS STARTING TO ANNOY ME!!!!

The Purity of Violence wrote:

DaemonAngel, I agree that the adventure dates itself to late 1918 and that the Soviets eventually captured and got into some kind of running order 59 (or so) Mk Vs, but they didn't do so until 1919-1920. While British forces arrived in Arkhangelsk in mid-1918 tanks weren't sent until August 1919. They also sent tanks to Estonia and to supply Denikin, but again these were all in 1919. I know the French landed some RT-17s at Vladivostok in 1920 but haven't seen any references to British tanks there. Anything you know would be welcome.

That being said

TritonOne wrote:

Isn't stating that the adventure occurs during the Russian Civil War sufficient considering the alternate history elements?

says it better than I did, or could.

The 8th Dwarf wrote:

I wonder what effect a permanent rift/wormhole between Earth and Golarion would have on Earths history?

Well I suppose it would depend on where and how accessable each side of the wormhole was/is but I can't see how Earth wouldn't be severely altered, consisting how just about every natural law would change, gods could prove they exist, alignment would be a real thing, high CR creatures could pretty much romp around at will and a whole bunch of other stuff that makes my head hurt.

My two cents for a light horseman in Golarion would be to do a John Carter - he falls asleep under the stars somewhere in Palestine and wakes up in a slightly different desert, though with his equipment (and a spare horse with a couple of thousands rounds of .303) instead of buck naked.

Or have a light horse troop find a stargate.

Theory II: Rasputin heard about these new armored "landships" and had some agents acquire and smuggle a few examples into Russia for his own use ahead of everyone else.

Warning: Use of a stargate system may attract the attention of aliens with an Egyptian god complexe.

You called?