Something happened in a Character planning discussion involving a few players and the GM of an upcoming campaign. I need it to be understood that I accept all blame for the tale that follows.
We've been gearing up for a "hard mode" sort of campaign, based very loosely in the dark souls universe, and have been trying to plan a level 5 party out for a good mix of survival ability. Up until this point, the party plan has consisted of a Warpriest, a Paladin, a Rogue, a Strynx support Witch, a charge ninja with the scout archetype (me), and occasionally a Wizard. We feel fairly confident that we can handle most threats, and not get mauled too badly in the process. Nothing too unusual yet.
Our GM has made a comment or two about importing a homebrew race or two from a previous campaign world. One of which is a size tiny monstrous humanoid race from a previous game, who are essentially ferrets with opposable thumbs.
As a joke, I propose a tiny Ferret-man Bard, specializing in dance and oration, who inspires competence by dancing, or rather, with the detailed descriptions of the dance that he is performing. ("right leg out, extend arm, grasp at air, and pelvic thrust!" etc..). The response I receive is pretty much as I expect: Laughter, followed by a sarcastic "I hope you die". I leave it at that, but tell the other players about the joke idea, and it is pretty well received.
At some point, a hat with a lectern is added to the witch, and the dancing is removed, and the pocket-bard seems to become a thing that could happen.
The real mutation, from joke to actual character occurred tonight, and I have roped other people into this mess. The lectern-hat for the witch, through the course of discussion, evolves into an enclosed compartment on the top of the Paladin's helmet. From there I could provide healing, or poke the end of a blow gun out through a view-slit to harass other foes.
Things are about to grow rapidly out of hand.
As discussion progresses, this capsule is moved down, and onto the paladin's chest plate, mostly to keep the weight in a place that could be carried more easily, and then, because of the limited field of fire from that location, a second capsule is attached to the back of his armor, with a length of hamster tubing wrapping around the outside, to facilitate travel within the armor.
At this point, we have two "turrets", but only a single crew member, so the witch offers to play a Ferret-man as well.
Feeling that our party has lost a serious amount of bulk, in terms of direct combat capacity, the GM allows the paladin to play as an Ogre.
The now-Ogre decides he likes the flavor of the samurai class, over paladin.
Feeling that we now have much more room to expand, we stretch our samurai's chest plate forward about two feet, and add a second turret, and stretch the back plate similarly.. we may have at this point described these modifications as "ship-like", and begun referring to the ogre as a ship. A pair of siccatite rings are bought, one hot and one cold, to build a small stove burner and a refrigerator, and the "turrets" are equipped with small groups of tube arrow shooters and a wand.
The ogre player names his samurai Yamato.
At this point, "Boarding" grappled creatures is brought up, and later use of charm or dominate to commandeer additional "vessels" is mentioned..
I may have turned another player into a battleship. If I did not do so directly, I am at least the most responsible party. May god have mercy on my soul.