Jordan Fenix's page

Just use the name of Rulla and we are game :D

NO! They don't have the right!
And they will have to take it from our cold bodies if they try!

Lilith wrote:

Update! I have reviewed all 45 submissions. I have sent out emails to a handful of people who need to expand their submissions to fit the page count. For those people - Friday the 26th is your new deadline. If you did not receive an email from me, please consider that your submission has been accepted for Wayfinder #3.

Edit: Beaten to it by the paladin. Isn't all that plate mail supposed to slow you down?

cleric :)

that and I didn't took the time to search for my answer :D

Montalve wrote:

Moorluck wrote:

Jordan Fenix wrote:

¬¬

this feels like an evil place needing to be purged with holy fire...

As much as I tried to help in the tentacle thread? I am hurt. ;)

i know i know

but aingle evil in one cplae doesn'tcause that much myheam
but a temple in theopen... well lets say its caling with neone lights "Paladins Want to be Here and bring the house down!"

and what is that about the laws of no purging!! there can't be laws at all in a CE very E tread!

Oh, honey, we're not evil. We're very, very good. ;)

i am unconvinced, and i know you are speaking in double sense to me... ye devils can't trick an Sword Knight of the Order of Questers

Jahaira wrote:

Jordan Fenix wrote:

no, thanks, no naughty for me in the job

Too bad, baby. I'm very good at naughty. ;)

"Careful - you might unsettle the paladin with prose like that!" ;D

I am sure more than one paladin might be unsettled, but I am a cleric andI havefaced worst, I won't be upset by mere words... now waiting for the devil of the threat to awaken so we can be done with this

no, thanks, no naughty for me in the job

Good, let's take a nap.

now, you don' go to sleep,don't you see that since this is your cult I must purge you? *tapping shoulder with her sword* s come on and fightly fairly so I can do my job

¬¬
this feels like an evil place needing to be purged with holy fire...

Hi my player is a paladin of Iomedae form the Cathedrall of light, he swore his aligence to the church when he became a knight, but later on as an Andorian he choose to join the ranks of Andoran's finest , the Eagel knights. Thats all in his background. My main problem, he is a patriot and he spreads the ideals of democracy , but he also is a knight of a god. What if he had to choose between aligence to Andoran or to the Iomedae. This could make him betreying one of the side he swore loyalty to and thus lose honor like choosing whom to help in time of great peril, your god or your nation. So why there is so much paladins of Iomedae in ranks of Falcon knights? She is in fack a very agressive and active goddess , so crusades to distant realms are common probably for her worshipers and are they unaware that if there is a for example war with Taldor they might be rallied by the Cathiedrall of light or even the godess herself for a more (in worship perspective) important task like crusade against undead, deamons not some political affairs of Taldor and Andoran?

the Cathedral of Light may decide to do what Lastwall did when Cheliax and Taldor went to war... declared itself neutral... why?

becuase there are damn ebtter things for paladins to do than eb killing other paladins... wars between nations unless is for the ebst of the world are only counterproducent to Ioemdae's works...

so I myself, as Cleric of Iomedae would do and recommend the same... we heal everyone, we protect eevryone from absuses... those who abuse are going to be smite... whatever the nation whatever the time!

interesting indead Marcellius, Interesting, If i didn't venerated Iomedaei would think of joining such Order of the Phoenix... I must admit they have a great name.

This is actually one of my favorite things I've worked on for Paizo. I liked the approach to it and getting to delve more deeply into an area I'd already written about (Lastwall for the campaign book). I hope people enjoy the Vigil section and that every part of the book kicks booty.

most excellent

since there is 0 chance of winning this, because of godmoding I concede and leave for greener pastures...

not that I agree with most of what Jarod posted... but since there is no chance of winning and there is no fun... I concede and move away

*decides for this time to go for the easy path and give the lictor of the order of the nail the address of the guild Jarod learned that shameful trick and gives them the list of crimes they commited... she waits outside making her nails and killing the stupid ones who though they could pass True Sight*

Iomedae be praised, Hellknighs are good to uphold the law, i give them that... and since they would have tried to kill or abuse me I suppose its not an evil act to let hell loose around them

*watches the hellknights leave, bathed in bad and offers Jarod's description* this one worked with them... and mocks justice.

*watches as they go, calling fiends and hunting for Jarod while she returns to her works, leaving her non-Lawful-Good Henchemen get the "guild's donnations"*

Yeah, but it costs you loads of money, and he could kill him for free.

I see what you're doing there, J-Man: Keep killing people until the church runs out of spells/money. Very Abadar of you :D

spells... i don't worry "Gentle Reposes" give me a few more days...

money? its a problem? really? but there is this nice Thieve's guild... and I am sure they will DONATE to Iomedae after I have a few words with them... I can make them see sense... even without taking out my sowrd or being threatenign... I am that cute... and if they try to get... well agresive or stubbern... there is always hold person or Divine Power (3.0 edition) for such times...

next... of course is the assassin's guild...

I bet they kill Jarod before to long... just to take me from voer their shoulders...

Kills a faithful priest just to prove her wrong

(if it was an Ioemedian or a good or neutral priest, for a good or neutral deity) smiles and revives dead priest with praizes to prove Iomedae provides

its nice when you can do that

Your clergy must have it easy, acting without thinking would have gotten me killed a dozen times over in Absalom.

we relay in good training and strong faith, one must not fear death in the path of justice, Iomedae will provide.

Predictable? Me? I'd say it's you who's predictable, because I saw the mischief in your face and let a poor farmer take my place. I think his back went out because of you.

Too bad you have to abandon the chase to heal him. :)

blessed BoXM... I healed him as I finished hiting him... and I had no mischief... is part of the training, you act not think when the needs come.

Uhh, he's indestructible, and may just lie there and enjoy the view as you trample over him.

used arms to trample him, and who said I tried to destroy him... just take him put of the way

Warps ahead again.

Isn't it great to know the shortcut? Efficient.

*makes some calculation due to experience, and takes Joanne's arm in time to level it up to the height of the neck, trampling KaeYoss as he appears in his next warp*

no... not when its so predictable...

This running stuff looks interesting, though hardly efficient.

*Passes the clown without effort*

sorry... running... no talking... also its fun...

Stops, laboring for breath, Chaotic clowns and now two other fanatics. this place is dangerous. *Looks over shoulder* Ahhh, Not again, starts running away, again. All the while screaming, I am just empty calories still

*running pretty fast without effort behind the diet coke*

mmm ok I know I shouldn't use the blessings of Iomedae like this... but she would approve

Godspeed from BoXM for the Win

...either that or sharks with lasers on their heads. =D

I want those for my temple!!

sharks with freeking lasers on their heads!!!!

If I lied about it, would you believe me?

she might fall for a lie... but you can't lie to me clown... come on dear, lets go for the diet coke *already wearing a red tunic over the translucent armor*

mmm yes.. some non translucen clothes below would be useful... mmm and yes i have a great love for diet coke... i see one running along... we should go and check on it :P

well I had to options, appease him while trying to let you run... or let him choose randomly... which always means she chooses all of the above...

*covering herself as her clothes are translucent to the point that they look as glass and tranlucent silk* you know the irony Joanne? if I had wanted something similar to this it would have cost a fortune...

mmm *sigh* considering I won't send you to make practical joeks to anyone... I offer me this - only - time as a voluntary sacrifice for your practical joke... just this one time...

*shispers to Joanne* run...

mmm no i am sure you were saying something about me to be valuable to win over... if it wasn't after making me fall i woul take it as a compliment

*returns from her attonement, for some reason she won't sit*

you forget Pride!... err ugh!

well... now i will go and have my attoneemnt and supplication... and no... no thoutube uploads... this is quite personal...

and Dr! that is evil! also it wouldn't work i had no such properties... even if it would be cute to have a minime

gah!! damnable clown! by Iomedae's shining sword... I swear I will make justice for this!

*mumble grumble* i meant pure, my body remains pure through my goddess blessing and my mind through deep prayers and meditation!

*swears an Oath by the 11 acts to search a dictionary before acquescing to any word or recomendation made by the clown*

err i think i was praying to hard yesterday... and I was a bit angry... my goddess would kill when she learns I accidentaly impersonated her :S

interesting indeed

it would have been kinder just to kill the andoran... but he might have been catched

you might want to limit it to hellknights... not everyone with chelexian blood is a bad person, not even every chelexian

Jordan has a love/hate relationship with language. She probably meant prurience.

yes, thanks

and no doctor nothing of that sort... if it was like that I would have already an army to save the world of whatever dangers aroused

Oh, and the "being innocent" part: Yeah right. We've all seen the tape by now.

*blushes* well ok... maybe not that innocent, the other its not my fault... i have been blessed/cursed unable to lose the inocense of my body to represent Iomedae's purity

If I recall correctly, "nads" was used in the 90's as a shortened term for "Gonads", or something like that.... *gives a short "Beavis and Butthead"-like laugh*

er... welll I ... well sometimes I thanks Iomedae I am not native speaker of your tongue... i realize its infused with lots of infernal on it...

Remind me to introduce you to a friend of mine. His name is Sigmund Freud. I think he'll like to talk to you about a number of things.

o_O.. then nads mean something?

first notice... still I am innocent!

I am typo queen.. so bite me!

Jordan Fenix wrote:

for what I hear, our sister has fallen nad needs

I'm not sure what you mean, but it sounds painful!

Whose nads are we talking about?

typo.. i mean 'and' as in 'and needs'

I'm late to the party, but let me bid you welcome to Nippon, land of the rising fun.

Let your cleric know that I know some people if she wants to switch careers.

for what I hear, our sister has fallen nad needs to be hunted so ehr soul may rest in peace

ohh gick... poor Sarenrae cleric. i am sure your friends wanted but were unable to help you

*smiles crookedly*

Now Ms. Fenix you know I jest. ;)

¬¬ you looked quite "serious"

and Mojo before I you to back off before I apply a "cease and desist", better known as Morningstar of Producer's Bane... and we can send our celestial envoy Doroku, which I have been state is pretty good in her job, watch her resume on your TV good sir

0-0

And here I was worried about your virtue!!

KaeYoss bring the camera...
Ms. Fenix... just act out what happened.

¬¬U

*crossing her arms, not very amused* 1.. 2.. 3.. 4.. 5.. 6.. 7.. 8.. 9.. 10..

no way...

as I said I was captured... and thanks to the goddess there is nothing to worry about my virtue...

Jordan Fenix wrote:

ohh goddess... that will be a long video... now I fell less bad about letting Malkfenshor get the jump on her...

She wasn't the only one being jumped by Mal. I refer to scene 3. Oh, and 7.

By the way: Pretty ...flexible for a lawful chick.

GET YOUR COPIES WHILE THEY LAST!

*mumbels grumbles, but thanks that they haven't got anything on the cave below thirstletop when Malkfenshor captured her*

Jordan Fenix wrote:

Joanne, are you ok then?

...let's just say that day isn't over yet, but I'm better now.

good to hear, my best wishes

Jordan Fenix wrote:

fortunately that temporal lose took whatever memories of the horrible event form my mind.

It's okay, I got it all on tape. Xan' asked me to publish it as part of our wildly successful "Cleric Confessions" series.

ohh goddess... that will be a long video... now I fell less bad about letting Malkfenshor get the jump on her...

The thread is of the age of consent.

Am I to take your statment to mean that Xanesha left you worn out from the naughty stuff she did to you!?

Please, tell us more. ;)

*blushes profoundly* well I would just say that I was tricked into rescuing a hostage, poor dear Astrid had been dominated by the monstrous lamia... and captured via some dark spell, something to do with shadow tentacles or something of the sort... but I can hardly remember the rest... *which sound as a very bad lie*

fortunately I was rescued an hour later by the a good and dear friend who was able to restore my wisdom, fortunately that temporal lose took whatever memories of the horrible event form my mind.

Joanne, are you ok then?

18!

Now we can do all the naughty stuff in this thread, too!

?_? I don't follow you clown...

and my recent brushes agains Xanesha left me tired for the while of naughty stuff

Why thank you Ms. Fenix, I missed being around as well.

*bows with a small florish* Ms. Joanne, how are you, well I hope?

I don't think our jesting friend missed though, but I think I'll live. ;)

good to see you well friend, and yes there are somethings one must endure...

Oh I wouldn't worry much about the jester Ms. Fenix, or much of what he says, he does make me laugh with his delusions of grandure though.

indeed Moorluck

Well, if someone ambushes you and pushes a cloth in your face, try not to breath, even if he hits you in the solar plexus and all the air is forcibly expelled from your lungs!

breastplate and good fortitude... and better perception

I suppose there would be one elss kobold in the world soon enough

I was referring to Joanne's prejudice, so I was talking about half-elves.

And, to reiterate, humans and half-elves are different species, too.

And you can't really speak of radically different species here.

Half-elf and kobold are really quite similar. Compared to, say, Nymphs and axiomites, or Haveros and earth elementals.

I disagree, my mother wa shuman and that didn't make her a different species, I am of mixed blood, yes but i am closer to human and elf..

and I am sure a fey is closer to elves than a kobold would be ever to humans so, stop trying to link me with a kobold... they are not my type... and even if thywere... i don't like midgets... and that is indeed a personal prejudice... I like men I can see eye to eye without having to kneel

*cof cof, then points to her slightly pointed ears and big eyes* actually clown I am half-elf and while I have no probelms with the mixture of races... that is a different thing with radical different species... also I pass...

Jordan Fenix wrote:

no permanent home for me

So you're a vagrant. Live in a wain?

nothing of the sort, we have enough money for to arrive to decent and clean places and where there is one of our churches we can stay there... its a good life, we keep helping people and seeing new places.

Jordan Fenix wrote:

complicated, I live in the road...

How does that work?

it just mean I go where duty calls, so no permanent home for me for the time being... maybe when I grow old and retire... sort of 100 or 125 more years I suppose

not racist... but if he worked with the assassin he can't be that good... and I don't like the little folk that much, not like that *makes a sour face* makes me think about pedofiles...

well at least we can't accuse you of having bad taste... those sound like decent pointers...

What's evil about it? He won't bring you sweet gifts of mice with their heads bitten off. He's not a cat. He's a kobold. And I suspect he's not even evil. (Underachiever)

And quite besotten with you, after I sent him your picture. Seeing that picture, he said he finally understood why humans take baths.

He asked me to tell you he'll be at your place at around seven tonight, and he'll bring you gifts of candy and bath salts.

complicated, I live in the road... right now above the road...