I.R. Splodeygobbo Esq.'s page

Abducted for use as a test subject for a rogue alchemist’s Cognatogen experiments, I.R. received a dose of hyper-concentrated Cognatogen directly injected into his brain. This caused a permanent increase in his intelligence with one enormously notable drawback: his ego, and an inability to escape the utter dumb simplicity of Goblin grammar.
Once I.R. Splodeygobbo became more intelligent than his creator, it didn’t take much time for him to escape: he simply nudged a tube filled with pure potassium into a bucket of nearby watter. With the ensuing fire and explosion, the alchemist didn’t notice the little Goblin climbing up behind him with a frying pan…

When he next awoke, the alchemist (who from now on we’ll call Human Prime, because that’s what I.R. Calls him) was tied to a chair, with a Goblin ranting at him. Human Prime didn’t understand Goblin, however, which made lecturing him very difficult. I.R. therefore proceeded to learn Taldan in the span of about eighteen hours. His grammar was a bit rudimentary, but he was able to come out with something like:

"Hooman Prime, you have been bad hooman. Experiment on Gobbo is no-no. You is doctor, can see diploma on wall. Had oath to 'Do no Harm.' Expect Hooman Prime did many experiment on other Gobbos. No good. Now Hooman Prime has gifted Gobbo with smartness, and Gobbo must do one thing with it: Prevent Hooman Prime from doing more harm.”

"But… but… this is impossible! It’s been more than an hour! The Cognatogen should have worn off by now! Who… who are you?”

"Who are I?” The Goblin had not yet had time to address that question. He certainly was not the same as before, the impulse-controlled creature that would eat rotting ducks on the side of the road. No, with his mind changed, he was essentially a different creature altogether. One thing remained however…

"All Hooman Prime need to know is: I are Splodey Gobbo.”

He still loved fire, explosions, and everything like them.

He didn’t kill Human Prime, that would have been wrong. His newfound intelligence and Ego had come with a conscience as well. Instead, he used Human Prime’s extensive resources to try all manner of experiments. When the alchemist had nothing more to teach I.R. Splodeygobbo (which he had taken on as a somewhat ironic moniker) he used Human Prime’s library to acquaint himself with the laws of the land. Finding he now had use of an eidetic memory, he memorized all the available legal literature and added the title of “Esquire” onto his name.

Thus, leaving Human Prime in his cabin, I.R. Splodeygobbo Esq. left a signed note at the nearest barracks, detailing Human Prime’s crimes and where to find him. The Goblin has done much since then in the way of good deeds, using his species to render him unassuming until the exact right moment to strike. He sees himself as a crusading hero, righting what is wrong in the world with his massive goblin brain and knowledge of Alchemy and chemistry.

I. R. Splodeygobbo Esq.
Male goblin alchemist (fire bomber, trap breaker) 3 (Pathfinder Player Companion: Dungeoneer's Handbook, Pathfinder RPG Advanced Player's Guide 26, Pathfinder RPG Advanced Race Guide 117, Pathfinder RPG Bestiary 156)
CG Small humanoid (goblinoid)
Init +5; Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +12
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Defense
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AC 19, touch 16, flat-footed 14 (+3 armor, +5 Dex, +1 size)
hp 21 (3d8+3)
Fort +4, Ref +8 (+4 competence bonus to avoid catching on fire or to put yourself out when on fire), Will +3; +2 trait bonus vs. Poison
Resist fire 3
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Offense
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Speed 30 ft.
Melee morningstar +3 (1d6)
Ranged bomb +10 (2d6+4 fire) or
. . light crossbow +6 (1d6/19-20)
Special Attacks bomb 7/day (2d6+4 fire, DC 15)
Alchemist (Fire Bomber, Trap Breaker) Extracts Prepared (CL 3rd; concentration +7)
. . 1st—bomber's eye[APG], disguise self, shield, targeted bomb admixture[UC]
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Statistics
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Str 11, Dex 20, Con 12, Int 18, Wis 14, Cha 11
Base Atk +2; CMB +1; CMD 16
Feats Brew Potion, Burn! Burn! Burn![ARG], Point-Blank Shot, Throw Anything
Traits blight-burned, performer's surprise
Skills Appraise +8, Craft (alchemy) +10 (+13 to create alchemical items), Disable Device +9, Fly +10, Heal +6, Knowledge (arcana) +9, Knowledge (nature) +8, Perception +12, Sleight of Hand +10, Spellcraft +10, Stealth +12, Survival +6, Use Magic Device +4
Languages Common, Draconic, Dwarven, Goblin, Orc
SQ alchemy (alchemy crafting +3), discovery (explosive bomb), fire bombardier, mutagen (+4/-2, +2 natural armor, 30 minutes), swift alchemy, trapfinding +1
Combat Gear mutagen[APG], acid (5), alchemist's fire (3), ghast retch flask[UE], incendiary catalyst (3), paper candle firework[UE] (5), tanglefoot bag, tar bomb (5), unstable accelerant[ARG] (2); Other Gear studded leather, crossbow bolts (20), light crossbow, morningstar, formula alembic[UE], handy haversack, hybridization funnel[UE], alchemist starting formula book, 20 gp
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Tracked Resources
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Acid - 0/5
Alchemist's fire - 0/3
Bomb 2d6+4 (7/day, DC 15) (Su) - 0/7
Crossbow bolts - 0/20
Ghast retch flask - 0/1
Incendiary catalyst - 0/3
Mutagen: +4 Dex, -2 Wis, +2 Nat AC - 0/1
Paper candle firework - 0/5
Tanglefoot bag - 0/1
Tar bomb - 0/5
Unstable accelerant - 0/2
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Special Abilities
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Alchemy +3 (Su) +3 to Craft (Alchemy) to create alchemical items, can Id potions by touch.
Bomb 2d6+4 (7/day, DC 15) (Su) Thrown Splash Weapon deals 2d6+4 fire damage.
Burn! Burn! Burn! +1d4 fire damage when using nonmagical or alchemical sources of fire.
Darkvision (60 feet) You can see in the dark (black and white only).
Energy Resistance, Fire (3) You have the specified Energy Resistance against Fire attacks.
Explosive Bomb (Su) Bombs have splash radius 10 ft. and those directly hit catch fire.
Fire Bombardier (Ex, Su) Creatures take an additional 1 pt of fire splash damage per die.
Mutagen (DC 15) (Su) Mutagen adds +4 to a physical & -2 to a mental attribute, and +2 nat. armor for 30 minutes.
Point-Blank Shot +1 to attack and damage rolls with ranged weapons at up to 30 feet.
Swift Alchemy (Ex) Construct alchemical items in half the normal time.
Throw Anything Proficient with improvised ranged weapons. +1 to hit with thrown splash weapons.
Trapfinding +1 Gain a bonus to find or disable traps, including magical ones.