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1,568 posts. Alias of Douglas Muir 406.


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That's a fine scenario, but "PCs need to rescue a kidnapped PC" is not what I'm looking for.

Anyone else?

Doug M.

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I see the bad taste issue, and I'm not making the patients be the source of the horror. More like... there's a guy whose hallucinations occasionally manifest as short-lived illusions, so that everyone else can see them? Or a catatonic guy who occasionally levitates? Or a dissociative patient who has become slightly transparent, because she's literally slowly fading from reality?

Trying to ramp up the weirdness factor, basically.

Doug M.

Let's call it.

Real life intervened. I'm very sorry.

Initiative rolls for Team Evil! Let's do them all together.

1d20 ⇒ 13 mmkay, that's 14 for most of them but 16 for Zulfikor / Weasel. What've you got?

Okay! Glorious combat it is!


You come over the bridge and you're going MUCH faster. The other guys are not -- they have sanely slowed down. So you're closing on them. Actually, you're closing on them really fast.


Okay, so that was a very good roll! The cart is not flipping off the tracks! In fact, it is accelerating dramatically!

How's the other team doing?

1d20 ⇒ 9

Okay well, that averages to an 8 or so. Let's roll some dice!

1d20 ⇒ 20

Let me add, a big chunk of this is my fault for taking a couple of long absences. When the DM disappears for a month, it does somewhat kill the momentum. My apologies.

You're well past the halfway point. Brother D., if you could post your preference on the main thread, let's resolve this and move on to the (maybe) final scene.

Anyone else still with us?

I was literally just noticing Pathfinder's lack of classy, stylish deities. TBF, the evil ones are actually rather worse.

"Next is the Straightaway, says the halfling. "That's where you can build up the most speed. But the track gets washouts, and... it's a risk."

Okay! So please give an opinion on how fast you're willing to go on a scale of 1 to 10. 1 is "cautious!" and there's no chance of an accident but the enemy car may gain more distance from you. 10 is "RIDE TO VALHALLA, SHINY AND CHROME!". What do you say?

[sfx: dice rolling offscreen]

You are able to pull Father D. back into the car!

The sorceress in the car ahead of you literally screams with frustration and shakes her fist. But before she can cast again, the enemy car is off the bridge and whipping around a curve.

But anyway:

Remarkably, Father D survives this! Despite his bulk, he dodges nimbly aside and seizes the side of the car, taking no harm for the moment. Morvius leans over and grabs him. Morvius: it will be a Str check to pull him in.

However: as he clings to the side of the car, he's tipping it a little. SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEE the metal wheels scream against the rails.

Wow, that's a deep chasm! No bottom to be seen from here.

Janeesa wrote:
Can Janeesa try to attach her grappling hook, which she already has in hand, to his belt, if he manages to grab on?

Wait, like... attaching yourselves to each other?

(You could even attach yourselves to the cart! Crazy, I know.)

Ooohh just made it.

Okay, the cart is whipping past you. You can let it pass, or attempt to grab it. This is a simple touch attack, but then you'll also need a Str check.

People inside the cart can help you, but a bad failure could have consequences.

Okay. Well then, consider whether you want to max Int or Dex. Dex is normally the god stat and also you'll need it for those ranged touch SA spells. But OTOH you should be a skill monkey, and also spell DCs, and also you want those bonus slots for high Int because you'll be slot-starved compared to an equivalent level wizard.

Oh, and also: not a human, and you're going to miss out on the rogue talents and the 5th level wizard feat. Put another way, at 5th level you'll have just three feats, the absolute minimum, compared to a human wizard with five or a human rogue with up to seven. So, a feat starved build. Pick your feats with care.

(N.B., doesn't mean it won't be a great fun build! PF players sometimes get really hung up on feats and feat chains. You can take a skill focus, a spell focus, and Toughness, and still have a fun and playable character. Shoot, invest in extra kitsune tails. Or go Magic Trick [Prestidigitation] and turn things weird colors.)

Doug M.

Also, a simple Spellcraft roll will tell you what she did there!

Okay, so you are YANKED forward out of the card, 15 feet forward onto the bridge. The hurtling car is about to slam into you. Your options:

-- try to dodge. Possible, with a Reflex save. Of course, you're on a narrow track over a chasm, so the failure mode on this one could be severe.

-- try to jump into the car. With just a few ranks of Acrobatics, this would be child's play!

-- Brace yourself and try not to get knocked off. Lowest chance of killing you outright, but you'll take the most damage, and also the car will slow down.

(This all happens literally in a flash, so it's all you.)


"Zulfikor's a sneaky bastard. Most of his spells are either enchantment, or stuff to keep the slaves down. Talia's different. She's a blaster, straight up. Likes spraying acid around. We saw that when they fought the harpies. And she's got some kind of spell that can knock you sideways. Marius is the weakest. I think he mostly does detection magic. Knows how to hold a sword, though."

Okay, so Brother Attero is a great big target there, holding up that torch. So: he takes 3d4 + 3 ⇒ (1, 1, 1) + 3 = 6 points of damage.

and now for the roll that really matters: Brother Attero is hurled 1d4 ⇒ 3 x 5 = 15 feet. In what direction? 1-4 forward left behind right. 1d4 ⇒ 1

oooh, you lucky dog.

The first bridge was no big thing -- it went over a couple of cracks. This one goes over a damn chasm. It's deep. And it's long. And the tracks laid over it look disturbingly rickety.

Anyone have any relevant magic they want to throw (Levitate, or some such), or any other preparations?

Let's review: "She'll slow down here," said the halfling "because it's frightening. Everyone does. Keep the handle up, don't brake. Lean into the curve, and we can catch them on the straightaway after the bridge."

And it was scary, and they did slow down! And you are indeed getting closer!

But up ahead is the second bridge.

Okay! Well then...

...everyone is fine!


I see the thematic attraction of witch levels. They don't stack very well with the stuff a silvanshee does, though. That said, prehensile hair -> prehensile tail could be fun.

An outsider can take the fiendish template, no? But yeah, it already has DR and some resistances -- point. Not sure if it makes sense to change the agathion subtype to demon or keep it agathion.

Doug M.

The halfling has Acrobatics, I believe Grinceroy does too... Callinda?

mm hm, good, good. Have we missed anyone?

I want to complete this. Heck, I have ideas for going beyond this. And if we move briskly along, we should be able to complete this in... well, let's say we should be well past the halfway point.

Again, apologies for the long silence.

Okay, over an entire dang MONTH has gone by. There's a story, and I'll get to that, but for now: I'm back. I apologize for the disappearance, and I'm back.

If y'all are still around, please jump back in.

Yes! Everyone who doesn't have Acrobatics should make a simple, easy DC 8 Dex check.

Ugh, lost a week. Don't ask.

Will attempt to resume normal posting shortly. Thank you for your patience.

Actually, as you're closing in on it, that curve does look pretty frightening. It's quite sharp, and you're going pretty fast. And, um, the wall just disappears along there -- outside the curve, there's nothing but a steep slope into a black void.

If you trust the halfling, keep the handle up and lean in (a simple DC 8 Dex check unless you have Acrobatics, in which case it's auto-succeed). If you don't trust the halfling, this might be a good time to speak up.

Brother Attero Dominatus wrote:
[dice=And suddenly, Grinceroy was Cool!]d20+8

You're gaining ground! Of course, here comes a sharp turn...

"She'll slow down here," says the halfling -- he has to yell, now, over the rattling of the tracks -- "because it's frightening. Everyone does. Keep the handle up, don't brake. Lean into the curve, and we can catch them on the straightaway after the bridge."

It's bouncing off the side of the enemy cart!

You're plummeting down a passage in a mining cart on rickety, bouncy track built by slaves and partially undermined by flowing water, trying to shoot arrows at people inside another such cart below and ahead of you as you whip round turns. It's sort of like trying to paintball someone from a roller coaster. 20% miss chance seems kinda low actually.

Time and space are strange down here, sure enough!

Okay, so the long straightaway will continue for another round. The enemy team has gone into a huddle (+2 to AC and 20% miss chance), not shooting at you this round, but possibly preparing something. Anyone want to take a shot, or anything, or just make Ride rolls?

[/ooc](Speaking of which, okay, if Grinceroy isn't coming back then let's just say that whoever posts first can roll for him. He had a +4 Dex, so just roll and add 4, or 8 if the halfling makes his Aid Another check. Which he'll do on anything but a 1 if he's not making an attack or distracted.[/ooc]

Callinda, it's -2 on attack rolls (for the bumpy ride) but that hit anyway! Ouch! One minion is injured.

Duly noted!

The halfling sinks back down, reloading. "She has spells that can throw you around. This is probably not a good place to be hit by one." He gestures at Brother D. "Maybe one of you could hold on to him, just in case?"

Also, Callinda gets a shot, though with the minus for bumpy motion etc.

whipwhipwhip whizzz! whizz!

The halfling has assembled a makeshift sling out of a loincloth plus one of the bolts he raided from the shed.

1d20 ⇒ 9
1d20 ⇒ 14 -- even with the minus for an improvised weapon, that hits.

The heavy bolt flies through the air and /whunk/ hits her solidly. [rolling offscreen]. The sorceress gives a shriek of pain and drops down into her cart.

However! The halfling has been waiting for exactly this!

1d20 ⇒ 9
1d20 ⇒ 7

The halfling wins initiative!

He pops out from under the seat. He has something in his hand... is that a loincloth?

However! The sorceeress stands up and is casting at the good Brother.

1d20 ⇒ 18 concentration check is made!

Okay so! PEEW PEEW PEEW I mean swisssh

1d20 ⇒ 16 umm yes that hits! pTWANG thunk 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2 points of damage on Brother D!

1d20 ⇒ 8 nothin' but air.

Oh my goodness, that turned into an entire week. Sorry, team. We're back.

As am I. Busy holiday week, but I'm back.

Callinda Swan wrote:
What was the DC on that Fort save? I figure my 17 will be close, but not sure in which direction.

As it happens, it just exactly made it.

Worth a try.

From under the seat, the halfling hisses at Grinceroy. "Fool! Pull yourself together! If we don't catch them before we reach the bottom, we'll have to face the Geon!"

Coughing and gagging, Grinceroy grabs the steering lever again.

Halfing's Aid Another, without any bonuses because he's distracted snapping at Grinceroy: 1d20 ⇒ 13 still works

Ride check: 1d20 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (12) + 4 + 2 = 18 you're gathering speed again!

"There's a long sloping curve coming up," the halfling mutters. "We should be able to get some shots at them, anyway..."

Failed save, were seated doing nothing: you are nauseated for one round. It's a revolting experience, but does no lasting harm.

Failed save, sitting but were doing something (Grinceroy, he was steering): lose a a round. SKEEEE sparks fly from the rails as Grinceroy, panicking, grabs the steering lever and pulls up, slowing your speed.

Failed save, was standing up: Well, only Brother D. and Morvius were standing up. Brother D. made his save. Morvius... I'm afraid you need to roll a Reflex save.

Ha no not actually. That wall was some sort of spell of nausea and disorientation.

Made save: no effect.


The cart abruptly slews around, goes into a sudden disorienting spin , then flips upside down! You're upside down!

Saves for the halfling:

1d20 ⇒ 20

He's completely fine. Grinceroy:

1d20 ⇒ 7

hm, less good.

Waiting on Callinda. -- Huh, you guys are not rolling so great on saves in this bit.

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