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Is it possible to have a different take here? Or is a different view not to be "tolerated"?
So we have a tragic story about parents (or the representative nursemaids) who allowed her to grow up a very confused person. It seems that she actually IS female, but had the unfortunate circumstance of being born with a deformity that made this unclear, or else her parents had the poor judgment of demanding the actual girl be something she actually genetically was not. Regardless of what they believed, or how she self-identified at any point, she actually IS what she was born. Belief does not make a thing so any more than belief that 2+2=22 makes that so.
We have a character warped by her circumstances to not really know who she was because she actually is a SHE but was told to behave like a HE. I'm not sure how "biologically male" is "wibbly-wobbly, as regardless of appearance, she actually IS something genetically specific even if she and everyone else is confused. This is far more of a problem in a post-modern relativist worldview than I would expect to find in the pre-industrial societies that are the inspiration for Pathfinder.
I think it worth questioning, though, is this character is being held up as the "Greatest of Iconics", because of the content of her character (courageously facing down mercenaries who sought to take what was not due them), or because she is ACTUALLY a genetic woman who took the truth of that regardless of her previous confusion about being a boy or her parent's confusion or warped lie about what she was? Or is it for no other reason than that she is "trans" which can be whatever you want it to be? IS there a difference between fantasies about characters who are actually strong or smart or quick using those talents to confront monsters and fantasies based on trying to bury the truth of one's identity beneath a preferential belief? Why would this character be upheld as any greater an Iconic than Harsk, or Kyra, or Sajan who are all following noble, self-sacrificing paths?
Are we celebrating the character merely on grounds of their sexual beliefs and practices, or because of an appreciation for a fuller fleshed character that has to do with courage in the face of lies, greed, and fear?