That must be one UGLY uniform. Of course, I'm biased :)
Cherries I don't care for, I prefer grapes personally, or even apples, but like others have said, free cherries will be better! I do like cherries in my ice cream, but that's because black cherries can be found around here.
I only give out multiples of 5 for my age. And I just choose the nearest multiple. So I was 25 for a long time, and then 30, etc. I've always looked much younger than my calendar age; to the point that I routinely fool carnival 'age guessing' booths and get cheap swag.
So I only have to think about my age every few years. After you reach voting/drinking or other legal boundaries, the numbers don't mean very much.
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A bigger number for ones, a smaller number for others.
Just kidding. I totally aggree
Today I felt sick most of the day so I stayed in bed all afternoon instead of going on my usual activity frenzy. That means I was able to write 2 chapters for my Campaign Journal in a day. Back to the good times. I actually enjoyed writing the last one because it had one of the events that made us laugh a lot.
Despite my digestive system wanting to make my day worse, it has been a pretty good day.
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Pie is just a number too and look how tasty it is....
I may have gotten my wires crossed there.
Pie... Making a square out of a round pastry?
Another update on my campaign journal! I'm on a streak right now! And that's cool because I want to finish it soon.
Today I'm going to have lunch with my grandparents and my father's family.
Good company, not so good food. My grandmother is an awful cook.
My condolences.
It's just meat as thick as shoe soles... but I can stomach it xD
It's just meat as thick as shoe soles... but I can stomach it xD
That does sometimes increase the likelihood of dried out, tough meat. Of course, shoe soles really aren't that thick. Unless you're wearing platform shoes, of course.
Yeah last time I had to do that my girlfriends' grandma made the worst green beans I've every had. all The strings or at least a good potion were still in them. they weren't cooked tender and I don't think she put any kind of seasoning at all in them.
I have the opposite experience with green beans. This is a very typical dish here, grean beans with boiled potatoes, and a sauce made out of oil, red paprika and garlic.
My other grandmother, who was usually an excelent cook, loved them too tender, too oily, with too much paprika. It was like eating a paste. I couldn't stomach them until I started cooking them my way.
That is how I am with eggs I have to make them my way no one else (I know) makes them how I like them.
Also green bean paste sounds awful.
Many aged people like their food overcooked here.
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Yawn, good morning, afternoon or evening.
Could use someone making me dinner today, as I'm feeling a bit down today, on the other hand I would probably reconsider, if someone served me shoe-leather disguised as meat.
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Taste buds go as you get older, memory often does too. You forget you only need to cook the food so long, add a couple minutes, overcook it, but can't taste it being wrong. Me, I've had green beans and ham here, green beans and potatoes is a common dish hereabouts too. I just don't like them as a leftover; too soggy too fast too often.
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I like green beans fresh from the garden and that's all.
Yawn, good morning, afternoon or evening.Could use someone making me dinner today, as I'm feeling a bit down today, on the other hand I would probably reconsider, if someone served me shoe-leather disguised as meat.
In the end I didn't get overcooked meat nor overcooked beans... it was overcooked paella with overcooked rice, overcooked seafood, overcooked peas... you get it xD
I was feeling better of my stomach but overcooked rice always feels like a kick on it.Why are you feeling down, Kjel? Something I can do?
*Smashes coffee cheesecake against her phone and pushes "send"*
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I think you got the wrong number...
I think I just spread it all over the thread.
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Yawn, good morning, afternoon or evening.Could use someone making me dinner today, as I'm feeling a bit down today, on the other hand I would probably reconsider, if someone served me shoe-leather disguised as meat.
In the end I didn't get overcooked meat nor overcooked beans... it was overcooked paella with overcooked rice, overcooked seafood, overcooked peas... you get it xD
I was feeling better of my stomach but overcooked rice always feels like a kick on it.Why are you feeling down, Kjel? Something I can do?
*Smashes coffee cheesecake against her phone and pushes "send"*
Thanks a bunch Kile.
Well, I'm feeling a bit down and the primary reason, I think, is loneliness. I've been living alone for around 8 years now and during that time I haven't really had any companionship. So I guess, what I'm missing is having someone around me, someone to hug, and to lean on.
I get these pangs of loneliness, once in a while, when I've been exposed to people I really appreciate and like, or people I know getting together with someone they love. Usually it ends up with me going into a depression, for a while, because I can't figured out, this being together with someone thing.
I sorry for bring my mental baggage into this thread, it really isn't what its fore, but I just feel really crappy right now.
So unfortunately I don't think there is much you can do Kile, other then just letting me rave, whine and cry for a bit. Then went I'm done, you can give me an mental hug and assure me that I'm not really that useless.
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You're not useless! We can prop you against a door to hold it open, or dress you up in silly clothes and take selfies with you... lots of things!
(Pats Kjel on the back. "It'll work out fine. Be patient.")
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*Huge bear hug for Kjeldorn*
Whenever you want to talk I am here. You're a great guy, and I enjoy talking to you. Being alone sucks. I've been always surrounded by people, having a big family and I don't like being alone at all.
I can only give you metaphorical hugs, but if you want to talk just PM me or whatever.
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Thanks Kile and Cal.
*Wipes away a couple of tears*
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*Hands him a napkin*
*Hugs*
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Well, I'm feeling a bit down and the primary reason, I think, is loneliness. I've been living alone for around 8 years now and during that time I haven't really had any companionship. So I guess, what I'm missing is having someone around me, someone to hug, and to lean on.
I get these pangs of loneliness, once in a while, when I've been exposed to people I really appreciate and like, or people I know getting together with someone they love. Usually it ends up with me going into a depression, for a while, because I can't figured out, this being together with someone thing.I sorry for bring my mental baggage into this thread, it really isn't what its fore, but I just feel really crappy right not
Unless you want to start your own personal rant thread, I can't think of a better thread to do this in. Far better than hijacking a thread that has an actual topic.
I live alone, by my own choosing, and I have to put out extra effort to stay connected to people who care about me. Even the tiniest of threads can help you feel connected. I have a rule that says if I stay at home one weekend, I "have to" go out the next one. "Going out" means engaging in an activity with a group or person that requires conversation (so watching a movie isn't 'going out', but having a beer/coffee/meal afterwards is)
Intellectually I know that I need to keep personal connections to stay healthy (both physically and mentally). So I force myself to engage with other people in casual social settings. One of the best tools I have is a group I belong to that gets together twice a month to do volunteer work together. There are a lot of clubs/groups that focus on 'doing good', so tagging along with them a couple times a month might be useful for you.
Another friend insisted on meeting for coffee once a week at a set time and place, so that I would always have something to look forward to. That was years ago, but I now do the same for another person, which helps both of us have a person to lean on. You might think of someone you know who might have the same propensity to spiral down, and take up the burden of arranging a meeting every week, for your own sake as well as theirs.
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You're not useless! We can prop you against a door to hold it open, or dress you up in silly clothes and take selfies with you... lots of things!
(Pats Kjel on the back. "It'll work out fine. Be patient.")
My god man! We'll make millions! It'll be like if Tickle Me Elmo and a Thneed had a baby!
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Thank you Crystal.
Those are things I can recognize, both as problems that I face, and some of the strategies, that I have tried to use to help myself out of a funk (especially the meeting for coffee, might have a good candidate for that).
*Pets seahorse, while wondering how to care for a seahorse, as he only understands regular horses*
@Cap: That would be one s$#*ty and not very child appropriate doll/teddy bear. It would just spout random historical stuff, sigh loudly and roll its eyes if you told it a joke and if you tickle it, it would wink at you and say "lower please".
I'm cleaning the kitchen. The kids are still at the grandparents so I get to watch whatever I want. The finalists.
Mad Max Fury Road
Public Enemies
3:10 To Yuma.
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Thank you Crystal.Those are things I can recognize, both as problems that I face, and some of the strategies, that I have tried to use to help myself out of a funk (especially the meeting for coffee, might have a good candidate for that).
*Pets seahorse, while wondering how to care for a seahorse, as he only understands regular horses*
@Cap: That would be one s@#@ty and not very child appropriate doll/teddy bear. It would just spout random historical stuff, sigh loudly and roll its eyes if you told it a joke and if you tickle it, it would wink at you and say "lower please".
Sounds like Tickle Me Elmo and a Thneed (which is a thing everyone needs) to me.
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I have a hard time too forcing myself to hang out or socializing out of my narrow group of friends or keeping in touch with people I care. I usually feel like starting the approach by myself would bother the other people even if I know they'd like me to do it I still can't. If people get to me I am a social person, but I just don't know how to approach them. I rarely call someone just to talk or to say hi. I sometimes would really like to, but I just cannot. It's weird because I'm not shy for most things.
If I lived alone I'd probably be alone all the time.
So I can understand what you both mean because I have some of the same problems.
And ranting here is allowed. Ranting and speaking about food. XD
I just don't really like myself. I don't take social cues that well, I have a hard times getting personal boundaries and while I understand empathy, I have a hard time feeling it. That abnormality make me doubt myself all the time, and it make me feel unable to properly connect to other people.
I just plain old suck and I haven't even gotten to my proclivities.
"Age is just a number" anyway.
I'm of an age where, when asked how old I am, I have to do math.
Or, I say, "Mentally? About 14."
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I just don't really like myself. I don't take social cues that well, I have a hard times getting personal boundaries and while I understand empathy, I have a hard time feeling it. That abnormality make me doubt myself all the time, and it make me feel unable to properly connect to other people.
I just plain old suck and I haven't even gotten to my proclivities.
You really shouldn't be so hard on yourself. I've met some absolutely awful, terrible people and you aren't anything like them.
We all feel pangs of loneliness and inadequacy.
Why do you think I have so many aliases (well that, and Hastur Tammy told me to).
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I just don't really like myself. I don't take social cues that well, I have a hard times getting personal boundaries and while I understand empathy, I have a hard time feeling it. That abnormality make me doubt myself all the time, and it make me feel unable to properly connect to other people.
I just plain old suck and I haven't even gotten to my proclivities.
I'm pretty hard on myself sometimes, too. Many times I feel like I completely failed at life when I look back at my job history, education history, and relationship history. But one thing I've learned is that we're harder on ourselves than others are to us. I don't know you personally, but I know you here, and from what I've gleaned I think we'd get along pretty darned well. You're wicked smart, funny, and kind to others, which on a forum is sometimes a very rare thing where people think they can use their anonymity to hurt and insult others.
In short, you're one hoopy frood who knows where his towel is.
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I have a hard times getting personal boundaries and while I understand empathy, I have a hard time feeling it. That abnormality make me doubt myself all the time, and it make me feel unable to properly connect to other people.
Hah! That's easy to fake.
You don't have to feel empathy. All you have to do is listen very carefully and when they say something is a problem, agree with them. Nod your head. Look solemn.
It doesn't matter if the voices in your head are telling the other person how stupid they are and how clear the solution is. Just don't voice those sentences.
Most people only need a non-judgemental listener. That's what passes for empathy these days. If you can bite your tongue and not give advice or critique their behavior, you'll seem empathetic.
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@DungeonmasterCal:
Thanks Cal, its nice to hear, that others think that I've been behaving myself respectably here, and that I've not made an obstinate ass out of myself.
@Crystal:
I totally understand what your saying Crystal. But as with other things the faking is a double-edged sword, if it is easier to fake caring to a random stranger, its often also easier to fake caring to people closer to you.
To me empathy is an intellectual exercise, a simple question of how well I've read a particular person, so I can tailor my responses to fall within their comfort zone. If I fail, is only picked up by me, from the responses I receive from person in question. This has resulted in an rather large amount of social faux pas' over the years, and while today I think, I've got most of these things figured out, there still is situations, where I miss the mark enough to have people get quite upset.
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@DungeonmasterCal:
Thanks Cal, its nice to hear, that others think that I've been behaving myself respectably here, and that I've not made an obstinate ass out of myself.@Crystal:
I totally understand what your saying Crystal. But as with other things the faking is a double-edged sword, if it is easier to fake caring to a random stranger, its often also easier to fake caring to people closer to you.
To me empathy is an intellectual exercise, a simple question of how well I've read a particular person, so I can tailor my responses to fall within their comfort zone. If I fail, is only picked up by me, from the responses I receive from person in question. This has resulted in an rather large amount of social faux pas' over the years, and while today I think, I've got most of these things figured out, there still is situations, where I miss the mark enough to have people get quite upset.
Most of what I'd say is summarized by Cal's response, because that's exactly what I think.
Something that I've learned in life is that most people don't really have empathy, they just smile and tell you what they think you want to hear. They'd fake to be supportive when it's the easy thing to do. That's not empathy, that's just being fake.
From what I've seen of you I don't think you lack empathy, but that you are one of the rare people who care about being sincere. That doesn't make friends on the short terms.
That's what I only have a few friends, because I can't stand social hypocresy and I don't care about people with fake empathy. I no longer bother to keep around false friends just because it's socially accepted.
I like you the way you are. You are feeling down and being too hard on yourself, but don't let it bring you down. You are great.
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Eh being empathetic is kind of a pain. And I mean that because you feel others pain. It does make me feel psychic sometimes however.
Short real life example
me: whats the matter? response: how did you know something was wrong." me: Its not that hard people!
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I am often too empathetic. And I combine that with an inability to show my empathy to others, which usually ends in some kind of social failure caused by me attempting to help in an awkward and inappropriate way.
I also tend to worry too much. I felt down for quite a few days for a man who was in intensive care and he was struggling for his life. The fun fact is that I never knew the man. I just saw his name on the petitions for analytics, and I only knew how serious his condition was because of what I saw on the petitions. It has been two years since then and I still think of him from time to time. I still remember his name, and a bunch of others.
The motive for me to only have a few friends is because I have reveived too many hits in life. I expect people to act out of good will and let my guard down. And they use my trust to hurt me or to take advantage of me. I am unable to learn, because when I care for someone I care for real.
I hate fake people because of that. I don't expect people to show a lot of empathy, but seeing so many people taking advantage of the good will of others bothers me. I have been into a lot of trouble when I see that kind of behaviour because I just cannot keep my mouth shut when I see it.
About Kjeldorn, he has done something that has been really meaningful to me. I asked his sincere opinion about something... and he actually gave it to me. Honestly, I wanted an honest opinion but I wasn't expecting to get it. People don't usually care enough to be honest,because saying what people wants to hear is easy. Honesty is hard to find, specially because most people don't value it. But to me, it's one of the best qualities a person can have.
Woot Kjeldorn.
Yeah fortunately I've always been a good judge of character I can tell who I can trust and who I shouldn't. I of course distance myself for those I can't trust.
I look at it like the bell curve there is people that are generally not terrible nice and not terribly A-holes. Then theirs the outliers who are super nice or satan. It kind of helps me to think that for every person that is super crappy there is one that is super nice.
I think that's right. But even though I am good at judging people's intentions I tend to justificate their actions and keep trusting them. Even a person who has been an idiot a hundred times I give them the benefit of the doubt over and over again. With the same results. So in some way I deserve it.
Something that too often happens to me is an excess of sincerity. If someone tells me «I've thought that jumping off that window is a cool thing to do, what do you think?» I answer «Be careful, you're going to get hurt» not realizing that what they want to hear is «sure, it sounds like a cool thing to do, go for it».
I just cannot be like that. If a friend comes with an ugly dress and she asks for my opinion I might not say «you look awful» but I'd say «I like the other you were wearing the other day best». I just cannot give a non honest opinion. That's probably why most of my friends are next to colorblind males. They don't wear dresses and then ask for fake opinions.
I don't have much experience with that. I have no problem telling my friends they look stupid or etc. Advantage of being male I guess.
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Most of my friends are male anyways. I feel very disconnected with most female population. And after so many years among male friends I do a lot of things that women aren't supposed to do (I can burp like a lion roaring!) so it's getting worse with time. I consider myself feminine (at least my genitals indicate so) but I don't get along well with most women (I just don't feel I fit).
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Just finished making tomato sauce for a month or two. I'm planning on making pizza dough one of these days so I'll give use to some of it.
This time I used olive oil, 2 garlic cloves, an onion, 1,5 Kg of tomatoes (more or less), black pepper, oregano, basil, salt and brown sugar. I am already hungry.
This week I'll be working on the afternoon, so at least I will have time to cook properly my meals instead of doing it quickly after getting out of the job or leaving it prepared the former day.
mmmmmmmmmm
To me empathy is an intellectual exercise, a simple question of how well I've read a particular person, so I can tailor my responses to fall within their comfort zone.
I've failed a lot at that too. Which is one of the reasons I don't offer advice any more.
Instead of making assumptions and then saying something based on that assumption, I now fall back on questions.
So, for example, instead of saying "you must really feel bad about that" or "that must have made you angry", I go to "did you feel bad?" "were you angry?" Or "what did you want to happen when you said that?"
I try not to 'read' people any more; I'm just not able to do that. Mindreading is not one of my skills. So I've given it up for a more authentic posture: listening intently and asking questions that are based on what they said, not my assumptions about what their words mean.
It has saved me a lot of social errors, while still honestly conveying that I care about what has happened to them, whether or not I feel empathy.
Worst. Day. At. Job. Ever.
Worse. Day. At. Job. Ever.
Hugs for Kileanna! (if that sort of thing would be welcome. if not, offering whatever means of solace that would be acceptable)
Just myself worrying too much for things I cannot change.
I am a control freak who wants to fix the world even when I know that's not possible. ;-D
Working on a hospital has a bad side.