I still need to play in more games though. A lot of the feelings is just Gendered Dsyphoria...and the only way I can fight that right now is thru RPGs (specifically playing as a player I can totally submerse myself into my character...as a GM I am doing too many other things to do that). Even bad games help.
So, what your saying is that Rysky, Ambrosia, myself, and maybe one or two others need to create an RPG campaign to play online. :)
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That would help...I even have a unused Discord server...
Ran my game it was on a scale 1 to 10 I would say a 7. It was restarting a campaign after a 4 month hiatus though.
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Oddly lately it has been better.
I met somebody thru V-Space who is nice to me.
A friend is showing at least some support...in that he is rallying people outside of the L5R group on V-Space to get to know me better. Of course it is by getting support for me as a GM...and now I may have to run 2 BNW games.
I still getting hit hard by GD though. And I still need play more.
And I think everything relates to my GD...as the increase in stress at work is me pushing myself so I can earn more money so I can away from my transphobic family so I can safely transition.
Are you on social media at all? (Sorry if you already answered this.) If you are, can you create a brand new account as Selene (or another female alias) with no ties to anyone who whom you know in real life? When I'm online and not here, I'm mostly active on Twitter these days, and I know several trans and LGBTIQ+ peeps there. With a brand new account, you could just interact with other trans people and trans-friendly CIS people who would only know you as Selene (or however you name yourself).
You need positive people in your life who recognize and affirm you for who you are, and for your journey to discover whom you want to be. If you can't find that offline among your existing family and friends, you could maybe find some of it online with a new group. Especially for just socializing as Selene and doing regular social stuff, like chatting and goofing and cat pics and memes.
No pressure though.
I have gotten that advice before about social media. Unfortunately I get lost in setting it up or my lack of confidence rears it's ugly head ('What if I get no friends? :( )
I though since I have the week off will try to see if I can make it work as a project.
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I'll just throw in a warning that some social media sites are really nasty about dropping cookies and using IP addresses to link different accounts to the same PC. Some people have been outed by a "people you may know" link.
I haven't logged in to my Facebook account in over 4 years (most of my family, friends, and high school peeps are socially conservative or outright MAGA/Trump/Q believers), but you can tighten up your privacy restrictions to greatly reduce your exposure. The only other person at this IP address is my dad, and he doesn't have any social media accounts to cross corroborate/associate with mine. If I did, I'd install and use a VPN to change my IP address when on social media.
I use Firefox for Windows with the uBlock Origin and Privacy Badger extensions. When I'm on Twitter with Firefox, I only visit Twitter and Paizo; when I finish, I manually delete all cookies and the cache before closing the browser. I make a point of not logging in to any Google site while using Twitter, and I only make Google searches using another browser (Opera). FWIW, I also have a decent firewall (Comodo), and I make regular scans with MalwareBytes and SpyBot.
I browse all other sites with Opera (Chromium), which also I have installed the uBlock Origin and Privacy Badger extensions. I've set Opera to autodelete the cache and cookies whenever I close it. Opera has a built-in VPN, but I haven't used it so far. I've heard good things about the Vivaldi and Brave, but I will not use Brave because their CEO supported California's Prop 8 and is a COVID skeptic/misinformation vector.
I never installed the Facebook or Twitter apps on my Android phone, and I never even log into my Twitter account from my phone. I use Firefox instead of Chrome on my phone and I sideloaded Blokada, but I don't do much web surfing with it anyway.
Yeah I am not computer savvy like that.
But I have a computer need friend who maybe able to help me.
Going back to questions:
Is there an RPG setting or system you would be interesting in playing (as a player)?
Going back to questions:
Is there an RPG setting or system you would be interesting in playing (as a player)?
Right now.
Legend of the 5 Rings (preferably 5th ed). Because I want to play the concept I had without GM(s) screwing it over.
7th Sea (1st ed)
A Superhero game(preferably Champions Hero System or Brave New World)
Shadowrun
So my life took another hit.
Yesterday my Mom who was sick told me it could be a lot worse. The diagnosis at the time was very bad (like 2 years left to live bad). She is getting a second opinion though.
But I am a emotional mess, because after Easter where she started a conversation that was anti-trans and knowing full well now as long as my parents are alive I can't be myself. Part me is not saddened by this.
Which makes me feel guilty of course.
Also being stuck along with my Dad...not the best for me.
So my life took another hit.
Yesterday my Mom who was sick told me it could be a lot worse. The diagnosis at the time was very bad (like 2 years left to live bad). She is getting a second opinion though.
But I am a emotional mess, because after Easter where she started a conversation that was anti-trans and knowing full well now as long as my parents are alive I can't be myself. Part me is not saddened by this.
Which makes me feel guilty of course.
Also being stuck along with my Dad...not the best for me.
/hug
Thanks.
Going back to questions:
Is there an RPG setting or system you would be interesting in playing (as a player)?
Right now.
Legend of the 5 Rings (preferably 5th ed). Because I want to play the concept I had without GM(s) screwing it over.
Sorry. I'm back at the AEG 1st Edition.
7th Sea (1st ed)
Great Idea. But Sorcery is too expensive for what it does.
A Superhero game(preferably Champions Hero System or Brave New World)
I don't know Brave New World, but from what I've read, it is REALLY dark.
Which Hero System/CHAMPIONS edition(s) do you have?
Shadowrun
Again, which Editions(s) do you have?
On my end, I have been reading far too much Conan, so that leads me in a different direction.
Since Rysky & Ambrosia haven't chimed in, this is all kind of moot.
I tend to overly focus on mechanics and plot, often at the expense of role-play (such as the Romance sub-plots you are looking for).
Also, it is easy for me to fall into a hetero-normative pattern without consciously realizing it.
Re L5R: I am fine with 1st Ed.
Re 7th Sea: Agree to Disagree on the Sorcery...
Re Superheroes system: DARK is not necessary bad...though it is not you standard Superhero universe.
CHAMPIONS: I have the latest plus others but are in storage.
Re: Shadowrun....currently I own none of the books
Re: The Spoiler: :(
Sorry, Selene. *virtual hug* If you want it.
---
I have somewhere the corebooks for Shadowrun 2nd, 3rd, and 4th edition. I only got to play one game of 2e, and a few of 3e. There are some significant rules changes between 3e and 4e. I they are be up to 6th edition now.
Haven't played any of the superhero games.
Sorry, Selene. *virtual hug* If you want it.
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I have somewhere the corebooks for Shadowrun 2nd, 3rd, and 4th edition. I only got to play one game of 2e, and a few of 3e. There are some significant rules changes between 3e and 4e. I they are be up to 6th edition now.
Haven't played any of the superhero games.
Ambrosia, what do you know about the 7th Sea or Legend of the Five Rings RPGs?
Ambrosia, what do you know about the 7th Sea or Legend of the Five Rings RPGs?Sorry, Selene. *virtual hug* If you want it.
---
I have somewhere the corebooks for Shadowrun 2nd, 3rd, and 4th edition. I only got to play one game of 2e, and a few of 3e. There are some significant rules changes between 3e and 4e. I they are be up to 6th edition now.
Haven't played any of the superhero games.
Never played either.
Sorry, Selene. *virtual hug* If you want it.
---
I have somewhere the corebooks for Shadowrun 2nd, 3rd, and 4th edition. I only got to play one game of 2e, and a few of 3e. There are some significant rules changes between 3e and 4e. I they are be up to 6th edition now.
Haven't played any of the superhero games.
Thank you.
@Lord Fyre: Re: Spoiler
I have been thinking about this.
I don't mind mechanics...as long they are fairly implemented. Part of what pissed me off about L5R was my character's advantages were ignored and weaponized against my character. I had a advantage that would let me know if somebody has romantic feelings for my character. Somehow I got a yes to a the bbeg who wanted to make out with my character so she could rip a piece of my characters soul out to destroy the world.
I don't mind plot driven games as long as the plot take the character concept into account. Like the L5R game where my character is a shinobi and was told being sneaky won't work in this plot.
As for the last two...maybe it is time to stretch your wings?
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I don't mind mechanics...as long they are fairly implemented. Part of what pissed me off about L5R was my character's advantages were ignored and weaponized against my character. I had a advantage that would let me know if somebody has romantic feelings for my character. Somehow I got a yes to a the bbeg who wanted to make out with my character so she could rip a piece of my characters soul out to destroy the world.
I haven't read the text of the advantage, but I don't consider wanting to "rip a piece of my characters soul out" to be Romantic Feelings.
I hate to say this about people I don't know, but your player group seems to be made up of a bunch of "a+*%&%#s."
I don't mind plot driven games as long as the plot take the character concept into account. Like the L5R game where my character is a shinobi and was told being sneaky won't work in this plot.
I am having trouble imagining a plot that having a stealthy character wouldn't be helpful.
As for the last two...maybe it is time to stretch your wings?
I don't actually consider myself an LGBTQ+ ally, but I am trying to be a decent person.
That said, I wasn't actually volunteering to GM. (And if I was, I refer you to my comment above about Conan.) I haven't played or GMed a non-Pathfinder 1st. game in the last four years.
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I guess my point was while I like character driven games I don't mind strong plots campaigns.
And while as a GM I might sometimes play fast and loose with the rules I as player don't mind a GM who wants follow the rules strictly as long as they do it fairly and balance.
I guess my point was while I like character driven games I don't mind strong plots campaigns.
What you are saying is that there definitely is a "between space" that would suit both of us? :)
And while as a GM I might sometimes play fast and loose with the rules I as player don't mind a GM who wants follow the rules strictly as long as they do it fairly and balance.
Fairness is the primary (and best) reason for a stricter rules interpretation.
Who else would be needed to fill out a player group? :)
I guess my point was while I like character driven games I don't mind strong plots campaigns.What you are saying is that there definitely is a "between space" that would suit both of us? :)
And while as a GM I might sometimes play fast and loose with the rules I as player don't mind a GM who wants follow the rules strictly as long as they do it fairly and balance.Fairness is the primary (and best) reason for a stricter rules interpretation.
Who else would be needed to fill out a player group? :)
Yes I am very flexible in my playing. While I have my preferred playstle and GM style I keep a open mind about others.
I would not mind playing Pathfinder 1E. I have alot of character concepts that I can build there.
If it is over Discord? I know one person who would want to play definitely.
Who else would be needed to fill out a player group? :)
We haven't heard from Ambrosia, Feros, Rysky, or any others. :(
I would not mind playing Pathfinder 1E. I have alot of character concepts that I can build there.
If it is over Discord? I know one person who would want to play definitely.
I need to learn Discord. :)
There are many questions …
I dont expect much. As I said I know people have their own lives and may not
be able to commit to a game.
I have a unused Discord channel we could use with dicebots loaded up.
Though there is no map with discord. We either use Theater of the Mind or Roll20 or foundry for battle maps.
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So back to work for me today...
Still hanging in there. Still no light at the end of the tunnel though.
I am not playing consistently in games...the next one schedule is next Monday. So it is going be a tough week as I dont have a outlet for my Gender Dysphoria.
My brother may come up for a visit...which just adds to it as I dont feel safe with any family member anymore.
I thought solved a problem finding a way to roll dice on discord with BNW unquie system...but apparently the dicebot I need to do that is not working on that discord server. So the slight bounce up of a victory kind just got spiked back in my face.
Hanging on there though.
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Also today is Lesbian Visibility Day...that I have to spend invisible.
Also today is Lesbian Visibility Day...that I have to spend invisible.
B.T.W., the people of the Greek Island of Lesbos aren't happy about the term "Lesbian."
Also today is Lesbian Visibility Day...that I have to spend invisible.B.T.W., the people of the Greek Island of Lesbos aren't happy about the term "Lesbian."
Sigh
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*sends cuddles to Selene*
Thank you.
*hugs and cuddles back*| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Today was okay.
Nothing new bad happened.
Still hanging in there....sometimes by just a pinky...;)
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Still hanging in there....sometimes by just a pinky...;)
I think most days, Pinky is the only reason The Brain keeps hanging in there too. :)
Glad today didn't suck, hope tomorrow is better.
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SighAlso today is Lesbian Visibility Day...that I have to spend invisible.B.T.W., the people of the Greek Island of Lesbos aren't happy about the term "Lesbian."
Look, either Lesbos can get with the program and be tolerant enough to accept all that sweet lesbian tourism cash, or...
...the European Union can hold a vote and agree to let them be known as "The Florida of Europe." Trust me, they don't want planeloads of Floridas Man/Florida Mans showing up as tourists acting like the island is just part of Italian Epcot.
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SighAlso today is Lesbian Visibility Day...that I have to spend invisible.B.T.W., the people of the Greek Island of Lesbos aren't happy about the term "Lesbian."Look, either Lesbos can get with the program and be tolerant enough to accept all that sweet lesbian tourism cash, or...
...the European Union can hold a vote and agree to let them be known as "The Florida of Europe." Trust me, they don't want planeloads of Floridas Man/Florida Mans showing up as tourists acting like the island is just part of Italian Epcot.
Yeah, Lesbos tourism industry vs 3 hompophobic doods (I believe the article mentioned the plaintiffs were men, or omitted one) who think they can get people all over the world to stop using the world "lesbian".
Yeah, we're back in Beast Jesus territory.
Still hanging in there....sometimes by just a pinky...;)I think most days, Pinky is the only reason The Brain keeps hanging in there too. :)
Glad today didn't suck, hope tomorrow is better.
Lol
SighAlso today is Lesbian Visibility Day...that I have to spend invisible.B.T.W., the people of the Greek Island of Lesbos aren't happy about the term "Lesbian."Look, either Lesbos can get with the program and be tolerant enough to accept all that sweet lesbian tourism cash, or...
...the European Union can hold a vote and agree to let them be known as "The Florida of Europe." Trust me, they don't want planeloads of Floridas Man/Florida Mans showing up as tourists acting like the island is just part of Italian Epcot.
My views are on this are a little bit more complex. I know there are ass#$%s out there who will ridicule people from being from Lesbos. And while it is bs I get that stress this can cause.
But expecting the world to change is asking too much...they should probably change what people from Lesbos are called.
So...I finally had that talk with my Mom about what she did on Easter (starting that anti-trans conversation). It started out a little shaky but I think it ended up in good place. We will see.
Other wise it just been a bad day.
Gamer Question:
Aside from trying not to be an ass, is there anyplace I can find out about Table Top RPG etiquette with there is an LGBT gamer at the table?
I don't know how to answer that...as it is something I never looked up. I mean my basic rule in dealing with people is to treat with them with respect, courtesyand dignity.
Till they prove they don't deserve either.
But also reach out.
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I don't know how to answer that...as it is something I never looked up. I mean my basic rule in dealing with people is to treat with them with respect, courtesyand dignity.
Till they prove they don't deserve either.
But also reach out.
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Exactly!!!
Have you played Rise of the Runelords?
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Have you played Rise of the Runelords?
I have played like the 1st chapter and it stopped.
Have you played Rise of the Runelords?I have played like the 1st chapter and it stopped.
Same as Council of Thieves. Hmmmm ...
Yeah...I never finished playing any of the APs
Yeah...I never finished playing any of the APs
:(
Did you have a favorite AP?
To clarify, did any of the APs have "storyline" that particularly interested you?
In order:
1) War for the Crown
2) Hell's Rebels
3) Hell's Vengeance