In a homegame I'm currently running I've been having issues with a PC who is a little conceited about his character.
In this campaign I have allowed the players to be extremely powerful by giving them multiple wondrous items and having it be a high fantasy game to start off. This specific character has taken far too much to this as in he believes he is perfect.
He constantly threatens the party ranger, has charged in first and complained of almost losing his character and has kicked the alter of deity whose paladin was standing nearby. Whenever he faces an enemy, say a monk, and begins to lose all he does is complain, whine, and beg for help. This has happened twice now and he complains if he overhears me talking to a Co-DM about monks, grappling, or anything that stops him from
two-weaponing with his daggers. As a result so far he has tied the ranger up and placed him in-front of him as a meat shield, refused to move at all and then complain about not getting to fight, and also he tried to use an important NPC like he did the ranger (the only way i stopped this was by telling him the NPC was a Level 60 fighter and he shut up).
Basically I am requesting for assistance in 1) humbling him so hes less conceited and 2) show him how he could use tactics appropriately to increase his survival
note: he is relatively new to the game and I don't just wanna kill his character and burn all his gear and make him start over. So please be relatively gentle.
Sorry, I am new to RPGs but not so new to life. This person is going to have or already is having SLS. Shity life syndrom. I think you need to pull him aside and just talk some sense into him because if this person is an ass when it comes to playing Pathfinder (just a game), life is going to be rough.
Other will probably give you some more direct advice on how they have dealt with similar situations, but for me one-on-one works best.
Good luck.
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It's a group activity and he is spoiling other people's fun.
Tell him that, in a nice way, because it is the most important feature of tabletop rpgs: the agreement that we're all going to support each other's fun.
I might also make the point that a hero who never takes risks for others is no kind of hero: I usually have a 'PCs must be good' rule at my table to stop these kind of problems developing.
Firstly:
Nothing you can do ingame is going to solve this. Burn his character sheet, roll it up and smoke it, burn his items on a pyre.. it doesn't matter.
What you need to do is sit and talk to the guy away from the game.
During your next game take notes of the super-annoying things he does.
Sit after the game (next day or during the week or whatever) and go through it with the guy. Be friendly. Be nice. "Hey bob, I know you are new to the game and there are some things I'd like to go over with you". and then do so.
Make sure he understands each point. Let him retort. its also important he gets his 2 cents in, but make sure he understands 1) what he did wrong 2) how he can correct it.
Ask his permission to point it out in game if he does it again. Tell him that alot of players go through this, and that its no problem, but that you want to help him work through it.
Quite frankly, if you do that and it doesn't work (he blows up like a bomb during the meeting, agrees to it all then ignores it, whatever), then its time to politely ask him to leave the game.. or just put up with the crap.
-S
Thank you for the input, i do want to do this just so we can all go back to having as much fun as we used to before he joined out group. Also does anyone know how to show him in game how to behave because i believe that no matter the talk in game he may be disruptive, just recently i got a couple texts asking if they could kill his character and have him make a new one like he almost caused.
Also i realize that for the most part that in game stuff will be mostly ineffective though i also want this to be an in-game learning thing for him to open his eyes to what others are feeling. I do plan on talking to him calmly soon, our next session is the 23rd so that's when ill start taking notes of the issues, also do you think turning his own stuff against him would work, I feel I could easily make even a 15 point-buy goblin who could knock him down to size.
Yeah gotta agree with Cory. You got to tell this guy that his attitude and the way he is going about is out of line. Let him know that he is really ruining everyone's fun with his constant complaining and abuse of the party members. If he doesn't change his tune or worse, acts out worse just to spite you, kick him. You don't need players like that making trouble in your game and being a general prick to everyone.
I love threads like this, because I get to share my experience with the KoaDP (The King of all Disruptive Players).
He also loved to badger the other players, use his PC to steal from their characters, tie them up, use them as shields, etc., and then, of course, he complained if they did not help him, or if they did anything that violated his own sense of how things should be. I put up with it for years.
Here is the short answer. This guy has a problem in his life, and he has now discovered a game that can provide a safe outlet for dealing with everything he hates about himself. However, he is doing it selfishly, with no regard as to how you or the other players feel. And here's the tough part to hear: HE'S NOT GOING TO STOP.
You can't fix him. Let him go.
Also i realize that for the most part that in game stuff will be mostly ineffective though i also want this to be an in-game learning thing for him to open his eyes to what others are feeling. I do plan on talking to him calmly soon, our next session is the 23rd so that's when ill start taking notes of the issues, also do you think turning his own stuff against him would work, I feel I could easily make even a 15 point-buy goblin who could knock him down to size.
Punishing his character in game, while it'll feel good for you, won't solve anything. He will complain about it more. I have to ask, do you know the player personally or is he a pick up from a local gamestore? I know my party had the same issue with a guy we picked up from craigslist. Came to the game drunk, threatened to kill everyone's character, and kept hitting on the DM's girlfriend. Was not a fun night and we booted him soon after.
In my view, he's not going to learn anything from in-game consequences. What that will do is increase the whininess and provoke (with some justification) accusations from him that you're 'out to get him'.
He's presumably oblivious to the fact that he's reducing other people's fun or he enjoys being a jerk. It's best to be completely frank about the problem outside of the game - then give him every chance to reform himself (with occasional nudges as he learns how he can enhance everyone else's fun). That way, if he's just currently oblivious, everyone can continue playing together and enjoying themselves and there's no need for further action.
If he hears what you say, understands the other players arent enjoying themselves and continues to act in a way detrimental to group fun, then you can probably conclude he enjoys being a jerk. As such - how do you think jerks react when bad things happen to them in game? Is it likely to help?
Hey Quarotas I sympathize with where you're coming from on this; I've had my share of horrible players over the years. For most I've really tried to reach out to them as people to get them to see how they are being disruptive and ruining the game, but a few times we had to drop the hammer and simply say you're not welcome back. It's hard to do, but sometimes, hard is the only way to get through to someone.
Good luck and PLEASE let us know what happens.
In a homegame I'm currently running I've been having issues with a PC who is a little conceited about his character.
In this campaign I have allowed the players to be extremely powerful by giving them multiple wondrous items and having it be a high fantasy game to start off. This specific character has taken far too much to this as in he believes he is perfect.
He constantly threatens the party ranger, has charged in first and complained of almost losing his character and has kicked the alter of deity whose paladin was standing nearby. Whenever he faces an enemy, say a monk, and begins to lose all he does is complain, whine, and beg for help. This has happened twice now and he complains if he overhears me talking to a Co-DM about monks, grappling, or anything that stops him from
two-weaponing with his daggers. As a result so far he has tied the ranger up and placed him in-front of him as a meat shield, refused to move at all and then complain about not getting to fight, and also he tried to use an important NPC like he did the ranger (the only way i stopped this was by telling him the NPC was a Level 60 fighter and he shut up).Basically I am requesting for assistance in 1) humbling him so hes less conceited and 2) show him how he could use tactics appropriately to increase his survival
note: he is relatively new to the game and I don't just wanna kill his character and burn all his gear and make him start over. So please be relatively gentle.
I am going to give my interpretation of what I just read.
Player: "My PC is awesome, and the best thing ever.Player when in trouble(in whiney voice): "Somebody please help me. I am getting my butt kicked.
Is that correct?
I know this guy personally and in our group we are always hesitant to kick people out because that is how our group actually came to be kinda so we feel bad, afterwards if possible I will pull him aside and tell him 1) that I realize he enjoys his power in game and that it makes it great fun for him, however he is abusing it by treating party members poorly and 2) that while I do want the game to be fun for him I also want it to be fun for the rest of the people so he should probably be a little more respectful both in-game and out and if he doesn't I may have to kick him out if the other players are with me, and that while I have allowed it until now things are not going to be fun for anyone if it continues in the manner it currently is
And yes wraithstrike that is correct in simplest terms
So thank you all kindly for the advice, it's nice to here others takes in the situation on what to do, here is hoping he understands my concerns.
The others have given good advice so I would try talking to him like they said. I hope it goes well.
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I have played in games with players that are disruptive and try to dominate everyone else. Ultimately, in my personal experience, even a nice discussion about their bad behavior backfires in the end.
He might become ultra-passive to spite everyone, or may ramp up his obnoxiousness. He may be better for a while, but will inevitably come back to his bad behavior.
Usually there is an out-of-game cause for the bad behavior and until that issue is identified and dealt with in-game-behavior will not improve.
If it is a good friend for everyone in the group then every should suck it up and help the guy get his life back together (after all that is what friend do- they help each other when no one else will). If he is not a good friend and his behavior is threatening other friendships, then it may be necessary to cut him loose for the sake of other friendships.
Good luck and I hope it works out good for you.
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I guess I am a bit cold hearted. I believe in Honor - Respect - Loyalty. Sounds like your group was fine before him and you have enough players, so why did you pick this guy up? Is he a close friend of someone in the group? If so his friend should talk to him otherwise I would just kick him. RP suppose to be fun and relieve stress.
My group is rather large average 7-9 players that have been together for 7 years and anytime a new person comes in we follow simple rules.
1. First the person comes to observe one night of gaming and interact with the guys at the table. If it went well he can come with a character to the next game.
2. The recruit plays with us for a month and if everyone agrees he may join.
We had such a disruption in the group about 2 years ago that we started a 2nd group of players that had a different playing style... Yep we essentially kicked half the group.
Dump him and go back to having fun gaming.
Everybody has given good advice, I can't add a lot more.
I think most groups have had problems like this: you should really try to understand if this behavior can be corrected or not.
If it can be corrected, it will be out-of-game. No humbling will help, since he will just whines more. Since the player seems new to the game try to make him understand what PF is all about: fun for everyone. No one at the table has the right of ruining someone else's fun for any reason: not for roleplaying (but, but, my character would do that, I swear!), not because his life sucks.
If this behavior can't be corrected, just kick him out. It's difficult, but you don't want to lose other (better) players because they don't have fun anymore.
This player seems to like to be the star in your group and expects you to hand him the world on a platter.
This usually stems from deficites in his life that have nothing to do with the game. So the advise to talk outside the game to him is sound.
Before you do this you should reflect on yourself. What have you done that could cause this behavior to break out? What could you do to prevent it without hindering the game and the other players?
In short, be prepared to not only be stern on him but also be supportive or else he will have his self fullfilling prophecy (the world is unfair so I behave like an a*s so the world is unfair to me).
from what I read he has taken it much, much too far, just tell him that his character can do everything he wants, but he as player cannot. Take his character away and propose to either make a new character (that is in line with the others) or leave the group.
I'm normally all for a peaceful solution with fellow players, but that player seems to be a bully, a simple straight forward bully.
Also, kicking an altar of a deity ... let a solar or something come down and slaughter him, as they have more wealth than they normally should, it makes that deity much richer for less trouble.
I didn't say fight him with appropriate challenge rating, have that deity sent someone who will win and take everything, if he doesn't give in during the fight you can always destroy his soul.
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This is a social game and not an individual one. Tell him you expect him to play nice or he can not play at all.
I know you don't want to kick him out but he needs to see some repercussions from his behavior or he will never want to change. Some people are use bad players and float from game to game wondering why everyone else is a jerk. Others don't know that what they are doing is against the group's social contract and will correct themselves.
So if he corrects himself then you never need to kick him out. If he refuses to correct himself then kick him out.
Well here's hoping he understands, if I have to kick him out for even a short time I'm hoping he doesn't resent me for the choice. Also while I do know him personally he is not exactly my closest friend in the group and I feel that I may have to plan a speech in advance to make sure he listens.
Well thank you all kindly, it happens tomorrow and per request I'll report any progress with him and any realizations during the talk.
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I know this guy personally and in our group we are always hesitant to kick people out because that is how our group actually came to be kinda so we feel bad
Don't feel bad. This is one of the Geek Social Fallacies. If his behaviour is unacceptable, these are the consequences he must face, end of.
Pull him aside, tell him he is spoiling everyone else's fun, and he has to stop it or leave. The rest is up to him.
MMM rings a rather large bell here...
I have the same problem with a player in my group, builds a character (regardless of system) be it rogue, fighter or magic user and tries to optimise (sometimes cheats too) to get it to be the best he can get it then wades in with both feet attacks whatver comes at him even if he is the wizard. Hes an Ok guy just wants to be the superhero every single time. Makes life very difficult as he takes up all the play time with extensive convulted backgrounds and doing really stupid things even though he knows he cant do them. I have nearly killed him countless times (as have other dm's on our group) but all he does is sulk or throw his teddy in the corner and in one instance kill a game completeley.
Its a bit of a nightmare to deal with to be honest with you, the first thing I would suggets is to take his and everybodys sheet away with you at the end of the session or at least check everybodys sheet before each session (dont single him out as you will anatgonise him do the same with everybody else). Make notes of his stats and equipment and check everything as you go along. Don't let him bully you in to anything or adding anything to the character that dosnt fit ie mine was palying a witch and wanting oracle things as hexes...I pandered and it did'nt work and was a real mess, stupid mistake.
I will reiterate what everyone has said he wont change...you just have to either kick him out (sometimes this is not an option though) or adapt. Just be prepared for A LOT of extra prep work to reign him in and keep checking what he is doing, if he disrupts things call a time out and talk to him or get some help from the other party members, maybe its about time the pcs' taught this upstart a lesson...
Maybe after a few near deaths he may relise that he needs to plan and be more of a group player instead of a superhero...but don't count on it.
Pull him aside and tell him he is being disruptive and from that point on there will begin to be in game consequences for his PC actions. Remind him that no matter how powerful the character, there is ALWAYS someone stronger and far more dangerous. Point out that section at the very beginning of the book that says the DM is God and the final arbitrator. Tell the other players to play their characters and treat his CHARACTER, not him, how they would treat him given their past relations with him. Be completely fair with the the die rolls, good or bad, and if his character dies it's not your fault.
And if you really want to stick it to him, wake up the tarrasque. Wipe out the party and then have the tarrasque go back to sleep. Allow the party to roll up new characters at level 1 with standard starting wealth, no exceptions.
They key thing is you must stick to your guns. Be completely fair in everything you do, not only to him but everyone else as well. They can still reach those levels of power and wealth, but now you make them work for it. If they remember how hard they struggled in the past to achieve their station and power, they are much more likely to appreciate what they've done with their character.
PS: If his character dies leave him dead. Describe how his character's soul goes to hell for being such a treacherous backstabber. Remind him over and over and over there are ALWAYS consequences. And if he still whines, kick him. It's not your fault he's a big baby.
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Basically I am requesting for assistance in 1) humbling him so hes less conceited and 2) show him how he could use tactics appropriately to increase his survivalnote: he is relatively new to the game and I don't just wanna kill his character and burn all his gear and make him start over. So please be relatively gentle.
I'm sorry, but your player doesn't need gentle. He needs to be told flat out that his obnoxiousness is making the game less fun for you and possibly the other players as well. He needs to either reign it in a little bit or take a time out until he figures out how to play well with others.
It's no time to be passive agressive. Sometimes you just need to speak plainly and without guile so that there's no misinterpretation of your intent.
Well here's hoping he understands, if I have to kick him out for even a short time I'm hoping he doesn't resent me for the choice. Also while I do know him personally he is not exactly my closest friend in the group and I feel that I may have to plan a speech in advance to make sure he listens.
Well thank you all kindly, it happens tomorrow and per request I'll report any progress with him and any realizations during the talk.
Good luck, in the end this is the best choice you can make. This is a personal problem, not a game problem. A social game like pathfinder see's its share of personal problems because well, people have flaws. They come out when we socialize. This is not very different from having an insecure blustering bully in your group of friends. In fact that is pretty much what you have.
Don't feel bad. This is one of the Geek Social Fallacies. If his behaviour is unacceptable, these are the consequences he must face, end of.
I enjoyed reading that blog entry you linked to- I can see a lot of truth in it.
He didn't really start out strong it's just that via exploitation of certain rules, such as saving his funds to steal weapons from a store and constantly do things that allow him to power game via money.
I could easily drop his power by sending a monk with improved sunder destroy his gear and see his shortcomings but thing Is the party wizard took all the craft feats and is a relatively reserved person both in and out of game such as he has not been affected as much so he will fix this big stupid fighter right up back to the way he was, though I may be able to prevent that...
Anywho I plan on taking care of this ASAP and either way after we finish this campaign up i have planned on a strategy, non power based game, as in a 10 or 15 point buy, with low magic and lots of terrain based fights and ambushes and other things, hopefully this will make him play less of a person who stands there and gets beat up and more a person who thinks about others in game and out and based on one past experience, he will learn from in game story morals and the like( he likes reading so it seems to happen a lot)
Also this is his third character with the rest being relatively humble and helpful though I believe power made him crazy.
He didn't really start out strong it's just that via exploitation of certain rules, such as saving his funds to steal weapons from a store and constantly do things that allow him to power game via money.
You let him rob the magic shop? What were you thinking?
I run obtaining magic items as finding a craftsman or mage with the skill to make the item and then commissioning it from them. Steal from one, and the others will never deal with you.
Sit down and talk to him like a adult, OOC. Explain to him that this is a game, and that games have to fun for all involved, including you, the DM. Tell him you’re not having fun when he plays his PC like that. Tell him you’d like to have a heroic campaign.
Point him to the WBL tables and explain that he wont; be able to steal much beyond his WBL and stealing from merchants will do nothing but reduce his loot.
He didn't so much steal from a magic shop as much as he kinda got the wizard to help, and by via money i also mean in off times such as when the the characters didn't have assignments he stole from everyone, i mean everyone he could.
Also the items in the store weren't the issue it was the cash he found, it was a relatively large city, which equated to plenty of money in the shops, coupled with a few high rolls, things just went bad fast and I as GM couldve just said no but that would be unfair even if it did break the game, I believe in consistency in games.
Also i will be referring to the WBL table soon and fixing that up nicely, they are too far ahead right now from unfortunate (well for me) circumstances so i have a feeling that a little sundering will get his character back in line right after our talk.
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Sounds like a high level paladin might come looking for the thief who's been ruining the economy and lives of everyone he comes across (he IS chaotic evil by this point, right?).
*Edit: I'm normally not in favor of outright killing a player for misbehaving, but that kind of thing would totally happen in a consistent world, and his unlawful (and downright wicked) behavior should have consequences.
Sounds like he wants to be the center of attention. I've never been one to reinforce bad behavior (okay... maybe sometimes) but maybe he's just wants to feel like a hero/antihero and hasn't quite figured out how. He obviously wants one of those cool moments where he runs down and does whatever dingus trick he's been dreaming about but your tank fighter hits harder and gets the job done quicker so he hasn't had the chance.
Give the baby his bottle and let him be the center of attention for a little while. Maybe he finds out he's supposed to be part of some secret order of badassery that tatoos panther claws on his hands or something, or a cool NPC looks up to him giving him something to think about other than himself. Plenty of options to put him in the spotlight. Meanwhile your other PCs seem mature enough to take the role of background characters for a while (though it couldn't hurt to explain what you're doing to them) and of course reward them with cool stuff of their own!
This, of course, could backfire and he could try to constantly make stuff up about his order and get his panther pals to stab the PCs or push his fan off a cliff to get his stuff. Sitting down with him and talking about it could also backfire. He seems like a giant fit waiting to happen and it's another thing the party gets to hear him complain about.
You could just ice him too. He'll be back with another jerk, but it would be pretty funny.
What erth has said is correct we discussed this earlier, he is not CE because he has done a couple good things.
However with how things are going the more I think about it the more it looks like we will have to suspend him
*on an off note that dragon slayer class is pretty great, just saying ahead of time don't knock the class*
Hey Quarotas, when you said he "tied the ranger up and placed him in-front of him as a meat shield" what did the play of the Ranger do? How did he feel or react. Obviously as the GM you feel resposible to ensure everyone has a good time, otherwise you would not be looking for advice.
I play games to have fun and as an escape. I would not be happy if my game time (time I have taken for myself out of a busy schedule) was abused by another player. I think this guy has already over step the common sense boundries. There's role playing and then there's just being a jerk.
If you are prepared to give him another chance, good on you. But if it does not work out, don't lose any sleep when you cut him loose...just think of the other players (and yourself) and what the point of playing is...to have fun.
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This guy sounds less mature than my seven year old stepson.
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He told me he feels like crap when it happens, and would like for us to do something about it.
if you all dont mind i will be typing in caps for a few lines
I WOULD BOOT THAT LITTLE S.O.B. TO EVER (I WISH I COULD GO BIGGER CAPS) MAKE ANOTHER PLAYER FEEL BAD IN GAME IS INEXCUSABLE. A GOOD DM WOULD HAVE STOPPED THIS AS IT WAS HAPPENING. PEOPLE BECOME ATTACHED TO THERE CHARACTERS AND YOU PRETTY MUCH JUST LET YOUR DOUCHE BAG PLAYER ROLE PLAY RAPE YOUR RANGER. I WOULD FORCE THE OFFENDING PLAYER TO APOLOGIZE OR INSTANT BOOT HIM.
ok rage over aggravation still here. i have been looking through posts all night and have come across a PLETHORA of horrible players. it is a dms job to reign them in and make sure nothing like that ever happens. from now on that player will on occasion probably say do what i want or ill just tie you up again. if i was the defending player id give you the ultimatum at that moment. and if you didnt make that person leave the building id walk out. and that would go as far as to effect real life relations. its everyone job to have a good job and make sure everyone else has a good time.
cardinal rules of a dm
1-create an interesting world for players to live in
2- make sure game play is fair, balance, and fun for all players.
3- promote synergy in the party so all players feel involved.
4- stop characters from causing problems.
5- interpret game rules and set house rules to make the game move more smoothly and efficiently.
your players trust you to do these things. you have in my opinion failed numbers 2,3,4,5. and without those your campaign doesnt even matter.
slightly off topic...
It is "rein in" not "reign in". Think horses not kings.
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and back on topic.....
If the guy has been spoken to once and hasn't modified his behaviour then I'd remove him from the group. DMing is hard enough, particularly if you are inexperienced, without having an obnoxious prat making things unpleasant for other people.
DnD is meant to be fun for all involved and a cooperative activity. With a large group you run the risk of the "nice" players getting fed up and starting their own group and you are left with the problem player(s).
Here's the thing. This guy has some TWF dagger build that doesn't work. So he walks around like he's some great badass but then falls on his face whenever he fights. I know the rest of the party feels shitty with him around but he seems like he's a walking joke.
What dagger builds work? There's the rogue archtype but they kind of need flanking posts to get the whole TWF to work. There's other ways but not many. What is his build exactly? I'm curious. How can he be so arrogant?
Maybe set up some kind of arena thing and set the ranger against him and just let him beat the living daylights out of him.
First I would warn him verbally about the problem. Then if that doesn't work....
I would give him some kind of omen warning in the game, a sign of what may come. It may be magical, from the gods, from nature, from the planes, from space, from the elements.. but I would scare him with an omen in the game. Then if he didn't abide by it, I would kill off his character like the omen says it will. Given his last chance, he will have no choice but to look for another gaming group to hassle.
First I would warn him verbally about the problem. Then if that doesn't work....
I would give him some kind of omen warning in the game, a sign of what may come. It may be magical, from the gods, from nature, from the planes, from space, from the elements.. but I would scare him with an omen in the game. Then if he didn't abide by it, I would kill off his character like the omen says it will. Given his last chance, he will have no choice but to look for another gaming group to hassle.
OH! This comes to mind http://www.d20pfsrd.com/gamemastering/traps-hazards-and-special-terrains/ha zards/3rd-party-hazards/hound-of-ill-omen-cr-6
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Quarotas, Erth16 try this:
- Get a dozen 3"x5" index cards and some Crayola markers. Color one side of the index card GREEN and the other side of the index card RED. (Ask around in your group; if anyone is colorblind, then color one side BLACK and leave the other side WHITE instead.)
Give one to each player and tell the players they should set the GREEN side up. As soon as they are not having fun, they should turn the card over to the RED side.
If you as the GM look out and see a RED card ... then STOP the game, and ask the player why they aren't having fun. If the answer is "I don't want <bad player> to tie my Ranger up." then you tell the player doing the tying up, "Look <red card player> isn't having fun. You must untie the Ranger."
If <bad player> says no, then say, "Okay, <bad player's character> is teleported away. <Bad player>, you're done for the session. You may observe quietly or leave the table, your choice. Oh, and the ropes binding the Ranger are suddenly gone too. Who's next in the initiative order?"
If <bad player> starts to complain or argue, "You may observe quietly or leave the table." At this point, you look at <bad player>, but don't say a single word or react in any way until <bad player> either shuts up or leaves the table. Even if <bad player> goes on for five or ten minutes shouting at the top of their lungs, you SAY NOTHING and DO NOTHING -- <bad player> either shuts up or leaves, there can be no other option.
If you start to feel weak, or like you want to cave in to <bad player>, or like you want to respond/reason with <bad player>, then look out at the RED card on the table. <Red card player> is the player you SHOULD be worried about. THAT is the player you are slapping in the face by not holding the line with <bad player>.
And here's the secret: Everybody else at the table is rooting for <red card player> and they're also rooting for YOU to hold the line with <bad player>. They don't want to say it, but believe me they're thinking it; as sure as the sun rises every morning. Don't let your other players down. After the game, they will THANK YOU for holding the line with <bad player> and making the game more enjoyable.
I would suggest talking to him. It may depend on your DM style, but I like to play realistically and don't like to pull punches. Tell him that he is being disruptive with his playstyle, and ask him to stop. Furthermore, most of these are just bad RP. Actually, it's most of the reason. It breaks immersion when a PC plays like he knows he's a PC. Unless, of course, attempting something stupid results in a swift death. Depending on the god and paladin in question, the paladin may very well have smote him on the spot or thrown him into a dungeon.
Anyone observing someone using someone else as a meat shield may very well not take kindly to that cowardice, dishonor and willingness to murder his own team.
I say warn him, and if he continues, let his actions kill him. The next time he, say, tries to pick up the archer, use grapple rules, and let the party turn on him if they want. The next time he gravely insults an NPC, let the NPC cut him down where he stands. If he complains, tell him to be better at making decisions.
