Before we rest, I will give Shortork an extract of CLW.
Here, drink dis, make you feel gooder.
Doza begins nudging Bull towards the nearest ramp and heading towards one of the smaller structures .
This flimsy structure seems to have started out as a workshed, but its sagging walls have been almost entirely overtaken by rampant plantlife.
Glug Glug looks at BBB and says, You hungry? as he opens the top of his kettle exposing the piggy stew he had saved up from the last encounter. He pulls out one of the many tin cups he found along the way and pours some stew in it before handing it over. I hope Doza and Shortork bring back another piggy, dis is last of it and mi tummy is rumblin!
Draining the bottle from Glug Glug Shortork tosses it over his shoulder.
"Mmmm, better. Piggy was very spicy."
Noticing Doza on the move he follows.
"We go with Doza Choppa. She think good, like you chop good."
"Come on Bull. More fire fruits. We get them."
With a kick of her heels, Bull and Doza moved over to begin to harvest the gourds.
Bigbadaboom chews on some burnt back fat grinning. Lard and grease oozes past his teeth and down his chin.
From somewhere near the upturned rowboat comes a loud, familiar sounding squealing.
A few moments later some loud and aggressive barking rings out, silencing the pig squeals.
Annoyed by the noise Shortork says
"Dog! sound wrong. Choppa we make quiet."
And he heads toward the rowboat
As Shortork wandered off, as he was prone to do, Doza simply shrugged and kept plucking gourds.
By this time Glug Glug has got a nice fire going and is preparing the second part of the meal. He leans forward sticking his head almost completely into the pot, his nose engulfing every bit of the armoma of his creation. Suddenly his ears perk up at the sounds of the barking dogs.
You hear that? Glug Glug says looking around. Sound like dog. Dog is yummy, me and toad haves new recipes for dog. We need get some
He then stands up and slowly makes his way toword the overturned boat.
"Huh...squeal sounds familiar...oh, dog recipe? I have dogslicer, I help!"
As Doza picked fruit and the other three pass between the house and the over-turned boat the squealing starts up again. The dog barks loudly once again, but this time the squealing continues until a loud and deep voice shouts out from inside the ramshackle farm house.
Shortork wanders over to the upturned boat. A large breach in the hull forms a sort of doorway to the darkened interior. Within is an immense sow laying in a mud pool on her side and breathing slow, shallow breaths. A far smaller pig with a heavy chain around it's neck is also within, it is the source of the constant squealing.
The pig's eyes seem to light up upon seeing Shortork and it squeals excitedly while pulling on the heavy chain trying to get to the goblin.
It takes the goblin's brain several seconds to process what he sees. If one looked close enough you might even see a wisp of smoke drift from Sortork's ears. His eyes light up and he says.
"Choppa! is Squealy Nord. We rescue.
He stalks forward ready to chop something.
The piglet struggles to get to Shortork but the chain holds it back. The massive sow, on the other hand, is not chained up, and seeing food walking toward her reminds her that she is never not-hungry. It slowly stretches and stands up in the mud and grabs one of those spicy gourds.
On seeing the giant pig Shortork moves forward and swings the Choppa.
Seeing Shortork move in and start swinging, Glug Glug raises his crossbow and fires into the large pig.
Point Bland and Percises Shot
Bigbadaboom fails at first to comprehend the danger in the bloated sow and walks over to pet it, but Shortork gets to her first and starts to pet her with the Choppa. He shrugs and goes to pet Squealy Nord instead. "Chain too heavy for Squealy Nord...'Chain the pig, pig get bored'," chants the confused goblin over and over again as he unfastens the chain around the piglet's neck.
Princess Crackling snorts and stamps her feat before taking a big bite out of the fire-breathing squash then burps directly at Shortork.
Seeing the huge pig bit the gourd Shortork ducks, unsuccessfully.
The fire damage sends him into rage.
He bites the pig then steps back and swings the Choppa
With the gourds gathered and a new commotion drawing everyone's attention, Doza kicked her heels to send Bull over to investigate. Not thinking her intention through, she found herself carried along as well.
Not sure what exactly was happening, she decided to mentally prepare herself for any task that lay ahead.
Seeing the Giant Pig cook Shortork, Glug Glug beings to daydream of cooked goblins on a stick before quickly snapping out of it. Glug Glug pull out a bomb from his stash and lobs it at the Giant Pig.
Glug Glug's bomb strikes the giant pig in the face, creating instant pork rinds from hog maw. The charred corpse collapses on it's side. Squealy Nord squeals excitedly and runs between the goblin's legs in joy.
The dog begins barking again from further off.
"SEE, TOLD YOU, BACON!! Glug Glug says with utter joy. Pulling his giant kitchen knife he begins to walk to the charred piggy and cut off chunks of cooked flesh, tasting a little piece. With a giant grin on his face, Glug Glug begins cutting off even more flesh at a rapid pace, saving it for dinner later.
The squealing from Squealy Nord and the barking from the nearby dog causes the farm house's occupant to roar in anger. Even without speaking the language of giants it is impossible not to understand that the ogre is spitting out a long stream of profanity. The ramshackle front door is flung open and a booming voice within calls out:
The door then slams shut and the profanity continues at a lower volume level.
Taking a large chunk of pork, Glug Glug looks up and sees Shortork looking a little crispy himself.
"He drink this, make feel better, less ouchie.
Glug Glug tosses a CLW extract to Shortork, then goes back to procuring some bacon for a delicious stew he has planned for later.
"Hmm, bigguns" Doza said with a sneer.
"Come. We go. We see. We eat" Doza said as she drove Bull over the make-shift bridge and towards the door that had opened.
Doza rounds the corner heading to the front door of the house with Bull clopping over rotten boards gingerly. The barking intensifies as a huge dog emerges from ruined chicken coops!
Inhaling deeply Shortork enjoys the aroma of cooked pig for a moment. Then the rage spurs him into action. Catching the extract from Glug-Glug he downs it quickly, stopper and all. Then moves to follow Doza.
"Waagh!"
Satisfided with the amount of bacon he has collected, Glug Glug makes a double move trying to catch up with Doza.
With a ever-widening grin, Doza waved her hand in the air as if it was on fire. Suddenly, fire sprang forth and shaped itself into a blade. With a kick of her heels, her and Bull were off in a charge, closing in on the newly emerged canine.
"MOAR BACON?!" shouts Bigbadaboom as he runs toward the sign of trouble. As soon as he sees it is a dog his attitude changes and he ends up cowering behind Shortork. "Not bacon."
The dog snarls and launches itself straight at Doza's throat.
Moving forward Shortork closes on the dog and swings the choppa.
"Waagh!
Glug Glug maneuvers closer, trying to get a better shot as well as reloading his crossbow.
Bull reared back on his hind legs and tried to butt the dog.
Irritated and insulted at being struck by the dog, Doza swung her blade of fire at the canine.
The fierce dog barks and snarls in fury. Shortork deals a massive blow to it, and Doza's fire finishes the job.
The racket is enough to finally drive Pa Munchmeat from his home.
The large ogre shouts back inside the house before chanting and shaking some sort of feather and bone fetish.
Upon seeing the Ogre Shortork steps forward and swings with the Choppa.
"Waagh!"
Taking a little bit more caution than, well, she ever had before, Doza lead Bull around the small structure to find a better approach to deal with "Pa". Had Doza taken the time to think about it, she may have wondered who Pa was talking to. Instead, she focused on calling upon more of her magic to guide her while managing to not ignite herself on fire with the flame blade.
Glug Glug takes a move action to attach an acid vile to his crossbow bolt and takes a shot at the rather large ogre.
4 piercing and 6 acid
"Whoa!" Bigbadaboom stares in wide-eyed amazement at the massive ogre bulk. He hustles forward and fires at Pa Munchmeat.
He takes a chunk out of the door behind the ogre, who flinches but is unharmed by his attack.
Pa Munchmeat shouts something to whoever is inside before recklessly rushing around the back of the house.
Seconds later a shorter ogrish woman emerges from the house. The farmer's daughter is as ugly as an ogre. Despite her being about as tall and thick as a large human, her head is the size of a full-grown adult ogre's. She scans the goblins, examining them closely.
Hmm, now what was it that the big headed one kept saying...oh yes. I remember.
"WAAGH!"
Somewhat put off by the large Ogre's flight. Shortork stands for a moment. Then hearing Doza's battle cry, he moves to attack the female Ogre. He swings with the Choppa. Preparing to shout, he suddenly pauses for an instant then.
"HGAAW!"
Glug Glug watches the large ogre turn and hoping to take a shot before he fled. Instead he turns his attention to the fat headed ogre lady and takes a shot at her.
BBB looks down to reload his blunderbuss. When he looks back up, the ogre has been replaced with a smaller ogre. "Oh, good, smaller. Just as ugly."
He fires at her, taking some flesh off her enormous head.
Guffy shrieks and runs back into the farm house. A smelly, long-bodied rodent runs outside hissing and snapping at Doza.
Pa Munchmeat seems to be doing something around the back, given the weird chanting and yelling.
A stuttering, hooting roar echoes around the farm. "Ra-ra-raaaaooor!" An insane amalgamation of bear and over-sized owl comes barreling around the corner!