The kittens ignore the wasp and use the same maneuver.Nay! This is a golden opportunity!
The kittens form a different position, that of a triangle with the Jarl at the lead. They divebomb the poodle with the triangle pointing right at Courtfool.
YAAAAAAA!!!!
The Jarl strikes, striking Courtfool on the poodle's shoulder and nearly knocking him to the ground. He swoops back up, and the rest of the kittens do the same, badly wounding Courtfool.
We shall teach you to respect the Kittens!You fools! Leave the poodle alone, he is but a poodle, and not intelligent enough to know better! He is a Lord of the Boards, you have no chance! If he turns to violence, you will all die!
The wasp turns to the poodle.
Get the hell out of here!
Poodles, it is only a matter of time before the Jacks come back! They may be idiots, but they've beat you before and will beat you again.
The kittens ignore the wasp and use the same maneuver.Nay! This is a golden opportunity!
The kittens form a different position, that of a triangle with the Jarl at the lead. They divebomb the poodle with the triangle pointing right at Courtfool.
YAAAAAAA!!!!
The Jarl strikes, striking Courtfool on the poodle's shoulder and nearly knocking him to the ground. He swoops back up, and the rest of the kittens do the same, badly wounding Courtfool.
We shall teach you to respect the Kittens!You fools! Leave the poodle alone, he is but a poodle, and not intelligent enough to know better! He is a Lord of the Boards, you have no chance! If he turns to violence, you will all die!
The wasp turns to the poodle.
Get the hell out of here!
You should have listened to the bee, Kitten Viking! *Starts punching kittens and takes the wounded Courtfool back to the Jack thread*
Meanwhile, at the Jacks' Cult...
Hmm...I sense a disturbance in the Board. A Lord is in danger.
*Sends out roots to determine what is the matter*
Jacks! Courtfool is in terrible danger! The kittens are killing him! You must get over there and stop them!
You should have listened to the bee, Kitten Viking! *Starts punching kittens and takes the wounded Courtfool back to the Jack thread*The kittens ignore the wasp and use the same maneuver.Nay! This is a golden opportunity!
The kittens form a different position, that of a triangle with the Jarl at the lead. They divebomb the poodle with the triangle pointing right at Courtfool.
YAAAAAAA!!!!
The Jarl strikes, striking Courtfool on the poodle's shoulder and nearly knocking him to the ground. He swoops back up, and the rest of the kittens do the same, badly wounding Courtfool.
We shall teach you to respect the Kittens!You fools! Leave the poodle alone, he is but a poodle, and not intelligent enough to know better! He is a Lord of the Boards, you have no chance! If he turns to violence, you will all die!
The wasp turns to the poodle.
Get the hell out of here!
Come, men! He cannot defeat us alone!
The kittens all use their favored tactic and form a triangle which divebombs the Jack. They begin reforming to repeat the attack.
Bee?! I'm a wasp, you pathetic excuse for an C3-PO!
Bee?! I'm a wasp, you pathetic excuse for an C3-PO!
This is for you! *sprays Raid at the Wasp*
|
You should have listened to the bee, Kitten Viking! *Starts punching kittens and takes the wounded Courtfool back to the Jack thread*The kittens ignore the wasp and use the same maneuver.Nay! This is a golden opportunity!
The kittens form a different position, that of a triangle with the Jarl at the lead. They divebomb the poodle with the triangle pointing right at Courtfool.
YAAAAAAA!!!!
The Jarl strikes, striking Courtfool on the poodle's shoulder and nearly knocking him to the ground. He swoops back up, and the rest of the kittens do the same, badly wounding Courtfool.
We shall teach you to respect the Kittens!You fools! Leave the poodle alone, he is but a poodle, and not intelligent enough to know better! He is a Lord of the Boards, you have no chance! If he turns to violence, you will all die!
The wasp turns to the poodle.
Get the hell out of here!
Yeah, my friend is back. grabs JRHM by the leg
Bee?! I'm a wasp, you pathetic excuse for an C3-PO!This is for you! *sprays Raid at the Wasp*
The wasp screams and falls, dead (again).
The wasp screams and falls, dead (again).Bee?! I'm a wasp, you pathetic excuse for an C3-PO!This is for you! *sprays Raid at the Wasp*
Holy ****!!! You idiotic hunk of metal! You're going down!
And KC joins the fray, sending a ray of frost from his Cleaver at the Jack.
|
You should have listened to the bee, Kitten Viking! *Starts punching kittens and takes the wounded Courtfool back to the Jack thread*The kittens ignore the wasp and use the same maneuver.Nay! This is a golden opportunity!
The kittens form a different position, that of a triangle with the Jarl at the lead. They divebomb the poodle with the triangle pointing right at Courtfool.
YAAAAAAA!!!!
The Jarl strikes, striking Courtfool on the poodle's shoulder and nearly knocking him to the ground. He swoops back up, and the rest of the kittens do the same, badly wounding Courtfool.
We shall teach you to respect the Kittens!You fools! Leave the poodle alone, he is but a poodle, and not intelligent enough to know better! He is a Lord of the Boards, you have no chance! If he turns to violence, you will all die!
The wasp turns to the poodle.
Get the hell out of here!Come, men! He cannot defeat us alone!
The kittens all use their favored tactic and form a triangle which divebombs the Jack. They begin reforming to repeat the attack.
Get 'em guys. Leads an army of Jacks to the thread.
Crap. Holy crap.
*Casts Sending*
Lemmings, get over here, NOW!!! It's at the Jack's thread! Hurry!
*Starts constructing eldritch walls to block the Jacks*
Yeah, my friend is back. grabs JRHM by the legYou should have listened to the bee, Kitten Viking! *Starts punching kittens and takes the wounded Courtfool back to the Jack thread*The kittens ignore the wasp and use the same maneuver.Nay! This is a golden opportunity!
The kittens form a different position, that of a triangle with the Jarl at the lead. They divebomb the poodle with the triangle pointing right at Courtfool.
YAAAAAAA!!!!
The Jarl strikes, striking Courtfool on the poodle's shoulder and nearly knocking him to the ground. He swoops back up, and the rest of the kittens do the same, badly wounding Courtfool.
We shall teach you to respect the Kittens!You fools! Leave the poodle alone, he is but a poodle, and not intelligent enough to know better! He is a Lord of the Boards, you have no chance! If he turns to violence, you will all die!
The wasp turns to the poodle.
Get the hell out of here!
*uses sword to decapitate Pony Stalker, which causes her to lose her grip* *knowing that's not going to stop her for long, continues to high tail it* Yells at Clubhouse* Hey guys, I need help out here!
You should have listened to the bee, Kitten Viking! *Starts punching kittens and takes the wounded Courtfool back to the Jack thread*The kittens ignore the wasp and use the same maneuver.Nay! This is a golden opportunity!
The kittens form a different position, that of a triangle with the Jarl at the lead. They divebomb the poodle with the triangle pointing right at Courtfool.
YAAAAAAA!!!!
The Jarl strikes, striking Courtfool on the poodle's shoulder and nearly knocking him to the ground. He swoops back up, and the rest of the kittens do the same, badly wounding Courtfool.
We shall teach you to respect the Kittens!You fools! Leave the poodle alone, he is but a poodle, and not intelligent enough to know better! He is a Lord of the Boards, you have no chance! If he turns to violence, you will all die!
The wasp turns to the poodle.
Get the hell out of here!Come, men! He cannot defeat us alone!
The kittens all use their favored tactic and form a triangle which divebombs the Jack. They begin reforming to repeat the attack.
Who said he was alone?!
Jack Hammer crushes the point of the wedge maneuver with several swings of his hammer. *The wedge collpses beneath the onslaught*
Good thing the poodles shared some their pharmaceuticals with the Jacks. I almost broke a sweat.
Yum, smashed kitten and eagle brains. Should go nicely into a Hungry Jack recipe.
Crap. Holy crap.
*Casts Sending*
Lemmings, get over here, NOW!!! It's at the Jack's thread! Hurry!
*Starts constructing eldritch walls to block the Jacks*
Why are you working against us? You will pay for this treachery!
Crap! We didn't expect this!
EVERYONE, FALL BACK! FORM A DEFENSIVE POSITION!
Why are you working against us? You will pay for this treachery!Crap. Holy crap.
*Casts Sending*
Lemmings, get over here, NOW!!! It's at the Jack's thread! Hurry!
*Starts constructing eldritch walls to block the Jacks*
The wasp was my friend. You killed him, even though he did nothing to harm you. You'll pay.
*Blasts Jack with fire hot enough to melt him*
Why are you working against us? You will pay for this treachery!Crap. Holy crap.
*Casts Sending*
Lemmings, get over here, NOW!!! It's at the Jack's thread! Hurry!
*Starts constructing eldritch walls to block the Jacks*The wasp was my friend. You killed him, even though he did nothing to harm you. You'll pay.
*Blasts Jack with fire hot enough to melt him*
Ouch! *ignores the pain and continues*
Ouch! *ignores the pain and continues*Why are you working against us? You will pay for this treachery!Crap. Holy crap.
*Casts Sending*
Lemmings, get over here, NOW!!! It's at the Jack's thread! Hurry!
*Starts constructing eldritch walls to block the Jacks*The wasp was my friend. You killed him, even though he did nothing to harm you. You'll pay.
*Blasts Jack with fire hot enough to melt him*
The kobold blasts again and also constructs a wall around the Kittens.
Crap! We didn't expect this!
EVERYONE, FALL BACK! FORM A DEFENSIVE POSITION!
Jack Hammer starts pulling the kittens out from beneath the nearby sofas
Need more ingredients. Hungry Jack is very specific about ingredients.
Invites Pony Stalker to betray the Jarl Kitten and his minions Pony Stalker! We'll have some yummies soon! Good eatin'! Tastes like brains!
The kobold blasts again and also constructs a wall around the Kittens.Ouch! *ignores the pain and continues*Why are you working against us? You will pay for this treachery!Crap. Holy crap.
*Casts Sending*
Lemmings, get over here, NOW!!! It's at the Jack's thread! Hurry!
*Starts constructing eldritch walls to block the Jacks*The wasp was my friend. You killed him, even though he did nothing to harm you. You'll pay.
*Blasts Jack with fire hot enough to melt him*
What are you so mad about? I thought he was working with the kittens and was going to attack me! Besides, you can just resurrect him!
|
|
Crap! We didn't expect this!
EVERYONE, FALL BACK! FORM A DEFENSIVE POSITION!Jack Hammer starts pulling the kittens out from beneath the nearby sofas
Need more ingredients. Hungry Jack is very specific about ingredients.
Invites Pony Stalker to betray the Jarl Kitten and his minions Pony Stalker! We'll have some yummies soon! Good eatin'! Tastes like brains!
Do you have any ponies?
Do you have any ponies?Crap! We didn't expect this!
EVERYONE, FALL BACK! FORM A DEFENSIVE POSITION!Jack Hammer starts pulling the kittens out from beneath the nearby sofas
Need more ingredients. Hungry Jack is very specific about ingredients.
Invites Pony Stalker to betray the Jarl Kitten and his minions Pony Stalker! We'll have some yummies soon! Good eatin'! Tastes like brains!
No, but it would give you a base of operations from which you could stalk the other threads.
Jack Hammer Smiles to himself as order has been restored in the universe and the Poodle Lord is once again safe. The smile fades as Jack Hammer realizes that he will be summoned to battle all too soon. He fortifies himself with beer and Hungry Jack Viking Kitten stew.
Suddenly, an elderly female kobold walks in. On her chest is a symbol of The Great Boardhealer, goddess of the protection of all living creatures of the Board. She frowns at the scene of dead kittens, eagles, and wasps.
Wale, dat won' do at all. Mass True Resurrection!
The Thieving Wasp and the kittens and eagles are all restored to life, even the ones taken by the Jacks for food. The cleric nods curtly.
There we are. All's raht in da world once mer.
The kobold turns to glare at everyone.
Now, no more o' dat, or Ah'll have ta send ya all ta yer homes fer a week!
Suddenly, an elderly female kobold walks in. On her chest is a symbol of The Great Boardhealer, goddess of the protection of all living creatures of the Board. She frowns at the scene of dead kittens, eagles, and wasps.
Wale, dat won' do at all. Mass True Resurrection!
The Thieving Wasp and the kittens and eagles are all restored to life, even the ones taken by the Jacks for food. The cleric nods curtly.
There we are. All's raht in da world once mer.
The kobold turns to glare at everyone.
Now, no more o' dat, or Ah'll have ta send ya all ta yer homes fer a week!
KC sighs.
Yes, Aunt Esmerelda.
Overwhelmed by an alien power Jack Hammer throws up Viking Kitten and giant eagle parts
Don't kobold clerics usually wear robes?!
Jack Hammer rushes back to the Jack Den to wash his eyes out and have his memory altered
Overwhelmed by an alien power Jack Hammer throws up Viking Kitten and giant eagle parts
Don't kobold clerics usually wear robes?!
Jack Hammer rushes back to the Jack Den to wash his eyes out and have his memory altered
The priestess puts her robees back on.
Wale, dat work'd wale. Meneged ta get ridda 'im wit nah casultees.
Overwhelmed by an alien power Jack Hammer throws up Viking Kitten and giant eagle parts
Don't kobold clerics usually wear robes?!
Jack Hammer rushes back to the Jack Den to wash his eyes out and have his memory altered
The priestess puts her robees back on.
Wale, dat work'd wale. Meneged ta get ridda 'im wit nah casultees.
Unless you count the brain cells lost in the memory wipe. Almost as many as are lost when drinking a keg, but without the fun.
Watches Yellow Dingo walk off in the distance carring an old set of Betty white Betamax tapes.
Stuffs Tack Nuke in Bag of Holding.
"That will come in handy some day."
A green-haired ninja girl climbs out of the bag of holding.
"Whoa! Whoa! Hold up there, fool! Whattayadoin' throwin' tactical nukes in this bag? And what happened to my Betty White tapes?"
She looks forlornly at the empty beta player in her hand.
"Well, this just completely useless now."
"Or... not..."
Little Ninja Greenhair grins perversely as she begins tweaking with the wiring of the beta player.
"Hey Jester... I ever tell you... your mama so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said 'Moving.'"
...
Aaaaaahhh!
The stuffed puppy dog golem cowers in fear.
Oh goody, a stuffed doggy. I want to hug and squeeze and mangle it.
"Rubbish. It's not even alive. It's a simulacrum of an unintelligent beast. You may hug and squeeze and mangle it, but do not expect it to return the favor. It's nothing but a bag full of artifice and pomp, and not even all that cute."
"And if you do take it home with you, you will have to feed it as well, lest you forget. Especially if it is mangled but still alive. Then you will probably need to insert tubes into it to feed it. Best to just kill the beast in that case."
The golem suddenly gets a stiff upper lip.
"Hey! I can feed myself just fine."
*KC's skull shouts*
Careful! He's putting those in all the major threads! Beware!
*KC's skull shouts*
Careful! He's putting those in all the major threads! Beware!
No! Protect it! It protects us all!
KC's Quest
The skull floats along. A troop of Lemmings, Bessy, and Diswiker follow him. A scroll of parchment is tied to the kobold skull, on which are strange runes.
"We are nearly there, my friends. Soon, we will be to the bottom of this. And soon the Goddess will be separated."
Moo?
Moo?
Yes, Bessy.Come on, I have the place in sight. Hurry!"
The group finally comes to an old, abandoned mansion. Vines clutch the place, and ravens caw overhead. The skull sighs.
Everyone...welcome to my old home.
The group goes inside nervously.
Be careful, guys. The book should be here, but the raiders might have taken it.[/i]
The group comes to a book, resting on a pedestal. A spotlight shines on it.
Here it is.
As KC attempts to levitate it, a ghostly scream echoes through the house. It is so loud and sharp, that the house starts to shake...
RUN!
The group flees, one of the lemmings clutching the book. Suddenly, a ghostly tentacle whips around from thin air and trips the lemming. The lemming trips, and some wicked power has killed it. The skull shouts...
No!
...and levitates the book. Knowing that he will need to energy, he passes the book to anotehr lemming. Which is killed in the same manner. This continues, with KC having no choice but to preserve Bessy's and Diswiker's power and force more Lemmings to die.
Finally, they make it out. There are only a few lemmings left, but they have the book. And the spirits of KC's kin cannot leave the house.