What the what?! A whistle blower who actually exists, and was not made up by me for purposes of this post, just handed me a stack of top secret internal documents from Paizo's marketing team. They show that the projected profits from a 1e hardcover compilation of Kingmaker are ELEVENTY BILLION DOLLARS!!!! There's even a footnote. Here's what it says:
"As shown above, the profits from printing a hardcover book for an edition we no longer support would be massive. The only thing that would generate more profits would be to continue supporting 1E indefinitely. However, this would go against our core philosophy of hating our customers and driving ourselves out of business."
(I must confess, I would actually buy a 1e hardcover Kingmaker compilation. I had forgotten that 2e was a thing when I saw this headline, and was sad when I realized this was a different beast. I'm optimistic I will someday love this beast, but I'm still learning about it, and right now, we're at the Netflix sans chill level of our relationship. I'm sad for you as well, you edition warriors, who you also love this 1e beast that doesn't and won't exist. I hope that you learn to love the new beast, or maybe find some different beast, or maybe otherwise find a different windmill to tilt at in anger and defiance. I honestly wish you the best, and hope that you are able to find peace and happiness in a world that doesn't supply the things you want most.)
Will there be conversion rules for Eberron? Because if not, I'm never playing 3.5 again and will tell all my friends, and they'll never play again, and then you'll go out of business, and your children will starve, and I will walk by you lying in a pool of your own vomit and misery and spit on you and yell "SEE HERE, ALL YE WHO DO NOT SUPPORT THE ONE TRUE EDITION, THE FATE OF ALL WHO DEFY ME."
But then I'll feel bad, and maybe buy you some coffee and a sandwich and we can talk about why you're too obtuse to appreciate that Eberron is, was, and always will be the pinnacle of gaming.
Scene: A party of adventurers arrive in an ancient, crumbling temple. The rogue brushes aside spider webs, and holds up his torch, peering at some ancient text on the wall.
Wizard: "What does it say?"
Rogue: "It appears to be dedicated to Kazutal, Goddess of Safety. It says 'Beware, he who would run with scissors, for it is dangerous, and injury is likely.' Wait! There's more. 'Always swim with a buddy, and not until 30 minutes after eating.'"
Fighter: "That is safe."
I’m seriously bummed about my pathfinder society experience here at Paizcon. I take some of the blame for not signing up for events in advance, but given that tickets are sold at the door, I didn’t realize it was 100% mandatory. I came with 2 boys, ages 14 and 12, just getting into the game and excited to play. Did they get to play? I’m glad you asked...
Day 1, I show up in the morning and there’s only 1 table with 2 seats open. That’s fine, the boys play, I sit and watch.
In the evening, my daughter decides she wants to play. So I go down and explain. I have three kids, very excited to play, plus myself, which makes 4 - basically a table ready to go can they please make sure that we have a GM for us in the morning. I’m told I can’t sign up in advance, but not a big deal. They will find us a game in the morning.
We arrive in the morning. Nope, no game for us. Can they ask a GM to come help (maybe one of you lovely scheduling people can help)? Nope. Can you maybe see if some of he other players will switch tables so that we have 4 seats? Nope, this other group has 4 people who want to be together.
Okay, fine, we will take 2 seats at 2 tables. After we’ve begun, I learn that the boys are replaying the same scenario they played in yesterday.
Fine. Day 3, we show up again (back down to 3). No seats available unless we want to play the same game the boys played the past 2 times.
I guess we play our own game. Im not sure what I was expecting, but some support would have been nice. Especially when I’m showing up every single morning and getting the same dog and pony show about how there are no seats.
Greetings, friends. It is me, your magical pony friend, back here at Paizo, basking in the warm glow of the flames and heat created by the launch of a new edition.
Now, as we're all aware, gaming was a much better pastime back in [insert the year in which you started] and has only recently been ruined by [PF2e/Millenials/4e/The Lack of Support for Eberron]. Rather than debate the future of this godless dystopia we all currently inhabit, I wanted to extend a hand to all my former comrades in arms and accursed foes (you vile scum sucking bastards), and welcome you to sit here, have a virtual beverage and slice of pie, and enjoy the pain and anguish of Those Damned Kids fighting the same war we once partook in ages ago.
So, hey, long time, no see. I hope the wife/husband and kids/pets are well.
Edit: Sorry friends. I thought we could have something nice and friendly, but I forgot how edition wars work. Kiss the spouse and kick the dog for me. I'll be back when the sun sets in the east and mountains blow in the wind like leaves. (Okay, I'll probably be back sooner than that, but mostly to talk about Fallout.)
Fare ye well, edition warriors.
Vic Wertz wrote:
I'm sure this is on your radar, but I hope you guys are ready for the massive traffic load on launch day. I still remember another edition launch having an inauspicious beginning when the countdown reached zero and then the company website went down for 1d4 days...
P.S. - I'd be happy to help and download my copy early.
As a fellow gamer who always, always, always buys a computer and/or phone immediately before the new version launches and makes my purchase obsolete, you have my deepest sympathies.
Well, I have all of this old edition warrior gear just lying around, gathering dust. And this pie, which, frankly, wasn't even any good the first time around when I was the one who had to eat it. But *blows off dust*, once I microwave this and definitively convince everyone on the internet with a differing opinion that they are wrong (you know who you are, don't make me call you out), pie will be served.
Pie will be served...
Rookie. Everyone knows that this lesson was originally taught by Zelda.
Adam Daigle wrote:
OMG! Are you going to make it again, Sebastian?!
I think so - my son has been bitten by the Pathfinder bug and he really, really wants to go. So I'll be there (subject to him earning the reward of going to PaizoCon), albeit with a 13 year old in tow. It'll be great to see you again in person.
I came out of retirement to say:
THIS IS THE WORST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED AND WILL RUIN ALL GAMING FOR ALL PEOPLE FOR ALL TIME!
Although I think we can all agree that this is the death of our hobby and the dawning of a new age of chaos and ruin, it will most definitely turn out awesome in the end, because Liz is, was, and always will be one of the finest people I've ever encountered (randomly or otherwise).
Best of luck in your next adventure!
How is everyone enjoying Raider (Nuka) World?
Porter Gage, there's no way I'm going to trust you and your second in command lead from behind bs. Clearly, you're going to turn on me and become the endboss, and I want you to know that the first opportunity I get, I'm going to stab you in the head...
...wait...you're a companion?
Oh...never mind. STFU and carry my stuff.
If it were just the cost, that would be one thing. But the pain of a PC goes well beyond the price tag for one as ignorant and backwards as yours truly. I'll keep my fingers crossed for a console version (yay) or iPad version (F~@$ yeah!) - every time I am exposed to the new version of Windows, I weep tears of blood and beg for the sweet release of death.
X-Com 2!!! Yay!!! Okay, let me just check the PSN Store...
Hmmm...it's out, right? Yeah, yeah, there it is, released February 5th. Okay...I can figure this out...
PC EXCLUSIVE!!?! SON OF A B%%&~!!!!
Okay, okay, maybe my daughter's laptop can play it...
DAMNIT, WHAT THE HELL, I WANT TO PLAY XCOM 2!!! THE LAST ONE RAN ON AN IPAD? WHATDYA MEAN I NEED A REAL COMPUTER TO RUN THIS!?!?
*ponders buying a new computer just to play this game...*
The next patch will fix MacReady's Killshot issue. It will now correctly show 1.2x headshot accuracy INSTEAD of 20x headshot accuracy
NERFING THIS CLEARLY OBVIOUSLY BROKEN ISSUE RUINS THE GAME FOR EVERYONE!!! HOW DARE THEY!!!!
Oh wait...we're not talking about Pathfinder here, right? Never mind.
captain yesterday wrote:
So the speakers, can they be destroyed, the radios explode when I shoot them, but the speakers just spark and s~!!, do I have to scour every inch for monitors.
Some can't be destroyed. You either have to haul ass through their field before you get bunny-foo-foo'd or find a switch of some type (been a long time since I've played this DLC).
I finally made it to the Institute and...
...was really into the rp aspect at that moment. So, when I came in, and saw my boy behind the glass, I got pissed off. The old man comes waltzing in, and I pull out my shotgun (Betsy!) to shoot him in the face before he can say anything. My metagame instincts kick in, and I hold off on shooting him, knowing that he's going to say something important and plot-relevant (though I can't imagine what he can say that will stop me from removing his head from his shoulders for what he did to my son).
Turns out, he survived the encounter.
Huh, looks like I'm addicted to alcohol (and my Charisma is too low for Party Boy). I suppose I could go to a doctor or take addictol, but...
*begins stealing and buying every single alcoholic beverage encountered.
Yeah, that'll work.
I'm not sure who mentioned Banjo as having some type of role in the moot, but I'm going to pretend that is my own independent thought,* and predict that Roy won't stop Durkon in time, the demi-god vote will happen, and Elan, on behalf of Banjo, will cast the tie-breaking vote.
*Unless the above is completely incorrect. In which case, I deny that I came up with it and refer you to the original poster who proposed the idea of Banjo's involvement for well-deserved mockery.
My overwhelming feeling about this season is that I desperately want someone to do something about Rachel McAdams hair. How about a comb? It's like someone who has food in their teeth, but it's her whole head.
Edit: I'm also looking forward to the departure of the rodent that lives under Colin Farrell's nose, as shown in the previews for the next episode.
In the history of the universe, there have been many shows with some central mystery at the core. Mulder's sister, the island, saving the cheerleader, the final cylons, etc. The resolution of those mysteries has almost always sucked (I'm honestly at a loss to think of any other television show with a central mystery that was resolved in a way that did not suck and actually fit with the information previously provided, though I imagine there must be some out there).
Which is a roundabout way of getting to the point that Gravity Falls stuck the landing last night - the pieces all fit, the resolution didn't feel like a total cheat, and it shook up the status quo in a way that feels very organic and true to the series and characters.
The Bill Cipher episodes are great, and I have a fondness for the Time Traveler's Pig (particularly if you go back and watch the other episodes and see the time traveler in the background of each one).
I've heard that the show will be returning in the summer, and have my fingers crossed. Apparently, the codes in the show go pretty deep - there're some hardcore websites out there dedicated to deciphering the various messages hidden in the show.
What is required to be a charter superscriber? I still have my tag, such as it is. I'm pretty sure I was a charter superscriber at one point, but lost that when superscriber status expanded to include cards/minis/map packs. I'm still subscribed to all print product lines.
Edit: Oh hey, I do still have a charter superscriber tag!
Edit 2: Hrm...maybe I'm not. I don't have the fancy purple border. Must just be Bella Sara for which I'm a charter superscriber.
The steampunkification of gnomes is the least of the crimes of the Dragonlance novels.
*cough* kender *cough*
"You know the problem with halfings? Bilbo, Samwise, Merry and Pippin* made them seem heroic despite their childlike size and appearance. What we really need is something that's like a halfing, but more annoying than an 8 year old with ADD and red bull for blood. Something so awful that everyone else at the table will hate the character, but that people will nonetheless defend as only needing to be played correctly."
"Okay, but is one comic-relief race really enough? What about dwarves - everyone thinks they're stoic and honorable. Let's have a race of dwarves that live in trash heaps, are stupider than goblins, and compete with the kender for being our most annoying creation."
"Brilliant. Can we do anything to ruin gnomes? I really don't understand why all these races that are the size of children shouldn't be more like children."
"Hmmm...well, we were going to make the elves like Santa's elves, but what if we turned up the craziness..."
"Don't forget the annoyingness!"
"...and the annoyingness and make those gnomes instead."
"Best. Fantasy. Series. Ever."
*Frodo intentionally omitted.