Finster the Monster Maker has thousands of unfinished haikus, such as his most famous unfinished work:
I will finish this
Finster the Monster Maker
Said
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I pop I'm Hiding In Your Closet out of a weaponized Jack-in-the-Box. When the last note plays, he is launched into the sun.
Captain Spalding is banned for sighting a plain Pulg.
The Wormlord, here is my advice: look for post titles that start with "The" or have "the" somewhere in the middle. However, if you find a post title that ends in "The" you've stumbled on an uncouth Paladin whom has managed to butcher their own vernacular while trying to say "Thee". That is a thread that explains how the color of draperies can influence the mood of the castle. Stay away from that thread. The next poster will also recommend a post here.
chrisfranss is banned for relying on the opinion of Fish-Malkovich.
Portmanteau Tutu
I throw a corn at Pulg. It's the scalding butter that gets him.
Booty-lovin' Pirate cannot stop saying, "Chips Ahoy!" - heavy on the "Ahoy!"
Wylliam Harrison is banned for using all of the blue eyeshadow.
KahnyaGnorc drives a '49, '50, '51, '52, '53, '54, '55, '56, '57, '58' 59' automobile! It's a '60, '61, '62, '63, '64, '65, '66, '67
Mikhail Ximenez is banned for not revealing his middle name, which is "Bocephus".
Sure thing, no problem, will do. The next poster will answer my ad for an assassin to perform a 'job', uh, before my next visit to the fish market.
Schism Hag is Doofenshmirtz spelled backwards.
KahnyaGnorc once stalled the installation of a stallion in a stall. But only because it coincided with the East Tennessee Hot Dog festival.
It's a voodoo doll of GoatToucher. Sticking pins in this doll often elicits squeals of delight just outside of your darkened window. I ain't helping you find that doll! The next poster also senses something outside of their darkened window.
KahnyaGnorc once stormed a city with nothing but pepper spray. It's amazing how many people will get out of your way when you repeatedly spray yourself in the face and scream, "This is mine!"
238 Beers on the Wall
Promoting Data
I off Gnasty Gnorc with a combination of gnightsticks, gnunchakus, and a gnuclear bomb.
I write music that never resolves to the tonic. The next poster invented a new musical instrument.
I'm Hiding In Your Closet is banned for having only 1 tooth.
I bestow Ao Shoku with pupils...and then show him the mass of hair I pulled out of my shower drain. I am brave enough to withstand the site of it, but alas Ao Shoku isn't so lucky.
I run over Your Closet in a hot-rodded tractor/mower pulling a seed-spreading trailer of industrial strength Roundup®.
Kind Clowns Cloned from Clean Cows
Yeah, but I stopped at three. The next poster has a different use for a bikini.
Seriously Underrated Overachievers
Granted! You now have as much time as you need take. Unfortunately, the only vacation destination that will be available to you from now until you die is your nearest funeral home. Lovely flowers, though. I wish we could drive bumper-cars to work.
Midgard Serpent is banned for not flossing between his teeth.
Giro-copters? I love those things as much as I love areo-planes! The next poster flies above people (and creatures) for the weirdest reason.
My mind did go there. I'm always thinking of what I'll be eating next. Speaking of next, the next poster has a poster of me eating something.
In THE TWILIGHT ZONE
Alley Cats and Top Hats - The RPG where cats who duel at midnight on the back fences of various suburb homes. Duels involve meowing and scratching. Avoid shoes thrown by the home owners.
KahnyaGnorc is neither here nor there.
I tell George Carlin a dirty joke, which mainly involves me saying, "Knock knock," over and over while pushing his face down in the mud.
Evil deeds you say? After work hours, I went around to all the employee's computers and unplugged their headphones just enough so that the headphones still looked plugged in, but that everyone would hear what they were listening to the next morning. The next poster did a good deed, but it was taken the wrong way.
I turned it into a musical. The props were fantastic but the actors were terrible. Mostly because of the fact that they were actual cats and just lounged around on stage. The next poster had a star named after them, which then exploded and wiped out all but one civilization on the nearby planets.
I heard that KahnyaGnorc once had a fling with a woodchuck. Or was it chucked a woodfling? I can't remember because after eating some of KahnyaGnorc's fermented pot roast, it's all a blur.
After taking one of the pills, I didn't eat while I played in the pool. Oh no! Now my gas is odorous and creamy. Looks like the crowds are dispersing. Guess it still works. *Hands Dedrick, The Professor a bag of hands. The next poster is bouncy.
Wasn't Fuzzy, Was He!
Kat's Eye is banned for not taking a bath every 16 minutes.
Algernon vs. the Flowers!
According to Halestorm, KahnyaGnorc lives the life of a pirate. Oops. That's Alestorm.
Ontario Ontario Ontario!
Third Base: I don't know!
Let's see *takes a sip* I've got abs. Now I'm def. Gee hi! Joking, Lemon. Oh I've got to Pee. Crust. UV rays. WXY? Zeeeeeee (or Zed for our Australian friends)! Nope, the soup is not safe. Next poster, bite your tongue!
Raucous Roses!
Pulg once tried to join Davy Crockett's posse, but accidentally went to Davy Crochet's outpost instead. Together, they crocheted a beautiful scarf.
KahnyaGnorc was actually the inspiration for Gilligan's Island. Well, mostly just the island itself.
Pulg is good as new! All thanks to my highly refined skills in the use of duct tape. The next poster will avenge Pulg's semi-death using semi-____________ (fill in the blank).
Pulg is a hairball in my craw. <cough> <cough> <Pulg>
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