As you may recall, last month Pathfinder fiction author Kevin Andrew Murphy temporarily lost his mind and wrote us a full heroic crown of sonnets featuring 15 of our iconic characters, then sent it to us as a Valentine's Day present. We posted it on the blog, and folks seemed to enjoy it. Perhaps too much.
Never one to back away from a challenge, Kevin has now written another poem dealing with the Pathfinder iconics and posted it on the messageboards, this time in honor of St. Patrick's Day. The poem—made up of linked limericks—is of a tradition known as "flyting," a very old practice in which two parties exchange over-the-top and often lewd insults in verse. (Think of it as a medieval rap battle.) In this case, the two competitors are Alain and Lem—apparently, nobody told the cavalier that it's unwise to take on a bard in an insult contest.
While things get a bit bawdier than we can post on the blog, those who don't mind a little crudity in their poetry may want to head over to the thread and read it for themselves. Having such a thriving fan fiction community is always fun and flattering, but this... well, this is definitely a new sort of animal!
Kudos to Kevin, and let us all hope they continue to offer internet access in his padded cell....
James Sutter
Fiction Editor
The Seventh Execution—Chapter One: The Watcher WatchedThe Seventh Executionby Amber E. Scott ... Chapter One: The Watcher WatchedHer or me. It was her or me. ... After the execution, after too many sleepless nights, afraid to face the waiting nightmares, I had to put the matter behind me. ... It was her or me, I declared, then made myself believe it. If I stopped, though, if I ceased whispering my mantra under my breath when I was alone, if I left off repeating it in my mind until I nodded off at night, the horror of the day returned. It seeped...Tags: Amber E. Scott Halflings Mike Capprotti Pathfinder Tales The Seventh Execution The Ironroot Deception—Chapter Two: The HoleThe Ironroot Deceptionby Robin D. Laws ... Chapter Two: The HoleOn massive, clawed legs, the forest-beast bounds toward the elves and their captives. Its beady eyes, shielded by rootlike extrusions, seem to lock onto Gad. It stops to snort and paw the ground. ... Gad can't help but wonder: why him? ... It can't be that he's the only human present. There are two in the press-gang now. ... Then he understands: he's bruised and limping from the thrashing Ethundel gave him. He reads as the...Tags: Halflings The Ironroot Deception J. P. Targete Pathfinder Tales Robin D. Laws Rogues Feat of Magic... Feat of Magic Tuesday, May 10, 2011Due to hit subscribers and store shelves in just a few days, we are continuing our look into Ultimate Magic. This week we are diving into the feats chapter, with a bonus look at spells. ... At 20 pages long, the feats chapter is by no means huge, but it does feature a little something for just about every spellcaster in the game, with a few options for nonspellcasters thrown in for good measure. While a number of these feats are here to complement one of...Tags: Bards Design Tuesdays Halflings Iconics Lem Monsters Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Tyler Walpole Undead Stop flyting, you two!Stop flyting, you two! Friday, March 18, 2011 ... As you may recall, last month Pathfinder fiction author Kevin Andrew Murphy temporarily lost his mind and wrote us a full heroic crown of sonnets featuring 15 of our iconic characters, then sent it to us as a Valentine's Day present. We posted it on the blog, and folks seemed to enjoy it. Perhaps too much. ... Never one to back away from a challenge, Kevin has now written another poem dealing with the Pathfinder iconics and posted it on the...Tags: Alain Bards Cavaliers Community Halflings Iconics Kevin Andrew Murphy Lem Meet the Iconics Pathfinder Tales Manipulating Terrain... Manipulating Terrain Tuesday, March 15, 2011For the last installment of the Design Tuesday blog on terrain, we are going to look at a relatively new type of terrain—terrain that you can actively manipulate. This kind of terrain can grant a creature a variety of effects, from an attack, to cover, to a special or enhanced mode of movement. ... Some of the examples of this type of terrain will look familiar. Much of it can already be found within existing encounters. Where this is the...Tags: Animals Bards Design Tuesdays Dwarves Halflings Harsk Iconics Lem Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Rangers Terrain Wallpapers Iconic LoveIconic Love Monday, February 14, 2011 For some of us, Valentine's Day is just another day. We go to work, come home, maybe hang out with our significant others a bit or send the kids off to the sitter for a rare night out. For other people, however, Valentine's Day carries more significance, and flat-out demands acknowledgement. They see it as an excuse to truly cut loose, to go all-out with the romance and treat it like a real holiday. ... And then, apparently, there's a third type of...Tags: Alahazra Alain Alchemists Amiri Animals Barbarians Bards Cavaliers Clerics Community Damiel Druids Dwarves Elves Ezren Fighters Gnomes Halflings Harsk Iconics Kevin Andrew Murphy Kyra Lem Lini Magi Meet the Iconics Merisiel Monks Oracles Paladins Pathfinder Tales Rangers Rogues Sajan Sarenrae Seelah Seltyiel Seoni Sorcerers Valeros Wayne Reynolds Web Fiction Wizards Give the Gift of Gaming... Give the Gift of Gaming Thursday, December 2, 2010Last night marked the first night of Hanukkah, and today is the seventh day of the traditional holiday shopping season. Christmas carols have invaded my car radio on the drive to and from work, and the flood of wishlists from friends and family have my inboxes overflowing. But this past weekend, I saw some of the spirit of the season exhibited in our own community and wanted to remind everyone of the tools paizo.com offers to help you show...Tags: Halflings Mike Sass Paizo Pathfinder Player Companion Wallpapers Short and Sweet?... Illustration by Alex Aparin ... Short and Sweet? Tuesday, October 19th, 2010With Halflings of Golarion headed off to the printer, now seems like the perfect time to show off Alex Aparin’s awesome cover! F. Wesley Schneider ... Managing Editor ...Tags: Alex Aparin Bards Halflings Harpies Iconics Lem Monsters Pathfinder Player Companion Wallpapers Paizo Fight Song... Illustration by Tyler Walpole ... Paizo Fight Song Tuesday, August 17, 2010If you know anything about me (and I'm not saying you should), you probably know that I'm Paizo's fiction editor as well as one of the developers. What you may not know is that, in addition to working on the campaign setting and making sure authors like Dave Gross are fed and walked regularly, I'm also a musician involved in various extracurricular bands and projects. Usually that doesn't affect my job at Paizo...Tags: Bards Gen Con Halflings Iconics James L. Sutter Lem Paizo Tyler Walpole Wallpapers Winter 2010 Releases: An Early Look!... Winter 2010 Releases: An Early Look! Thursday, February 18, 2010This week Paizo posted new product descriptions for dozens of products to be released in the third trimester of 2010, including new hardcover books, a revision of the Pathfinder Campaign Setting, and a brand new line of Pathfinder novels! ... We've been hard at work on these items for months, and even though you'll have to wait until at least September before they hit your game table, we're thrilled to finally be able to...Tags: Cards Dave Gross Elaine Cunningham Game Mastering GameMastery Halflings Irrisen Kaer Maga Maps Monsters Pathfinder Adventure Path Pathfinder Campaign Setting Pathfinder Modules Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Pathfinder Tales Prince of Wolves River Kingdoms Serpent's Skull Winter Witch River Kingdoms of the Fellnight Queen... River Kingdoms of the Fellnight Queen Friday, January 29, 2010It's a busy week here at Paizo, and that means it's time for an art blog! So enjoy this sneak peek at some artwork from the upcoming Pathfinder Module Realm of the Fellnight Queen and Pathfinder Chronicles: Guide to the River Kingdoms! ... Illustration by Andrew Kim ... Illustration by Jorge MaeseIllustration by Andres Espara ... Sean K Reynolds ... Developer, Pathfinder Chronicles and Pathfinder Modules ...Tags: Andres Espara Andrew Kim Bards Centaurs Elves Fey Halflings Iconics Jorge Maese Lem Merfolk Monsters Paladins Pathfinder Campaign Setting Pathfinder Modules Plants River Kingdoms RPG Superstar Sahuagin Seelah Wallpapers Andoran, Spirit of Liberty Preview... Andoran, Spirit of Liberty Preview Tuesday, December 22, 2009Andoran, Spirit of Liberty is due to arrive in January, and as the rest of the team is burning the midnight oil to get the next Pathfinder out the door, Wes deputized me to do a blog. Time for some preview art! ... The patron celestial of Andoran is an avoral named Talmandor, and as there aren't avoral stats in the Pathfinder RPG Bestiary, we put their stats in Andoran—sort of a sneak peek for Bestiary II next year. The...Tags: Agathions Andoran Craig J Spearing Florian Stitz Halflings Kraken Monsters Paladins Pathfinder Player Companion Wallpapers Snagged from the Vault: The Bastards of Erebus... Snagged from the Vault: The Bastards of Erebus Friday, June 26, 2009The Preview Purloiners strike again! Featured here in a painting by Kevin Yan are Lem and Seelah, fending off a rabid undead dog and a fiendish tiefling in Pathfinder Adventure Path volume #25: The Bastards of Erebus. Who knew that flutes could be wielded as deadly weapons? ... Vadid and Nahk ... Preview Purloiners ... The city of Westcrown is dying. Since being stripped of its station as the capital of Cheliax, the...Tags: Bards Bastards of Erebus Council of Thieves Halflings Kevin Yan Lem Paladins Pathfinder Adventure Path Seelah Snagged From the Vault Wallpapers Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Preview #7... Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Preview #7 Wednesday, June 24, 2009The Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Core Rulebook is set to release on August 13th, 2009, and in anticipation, we are releasing a preview of the game each week until the game hits store shelves. This week, we are taking a look at Lem, the iconic bard. ... Lem ... Male halfling bard 8 ... CG Small humanoid (halfling) ... Init +4; Senses Perception +12 ... DEFENSE ... AC 21, touch 17, flat-footed 16 (+4 armor, +1 deflection, +4 Dex,...Tags: Bards Halflings Iconics Lem Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Wayne Reynolds Meet the Iconics: LemMeet the Iconics: Lem Tuesday, January 22, 2008 Although Lem was raised in the lap of luxury, his childhood was anything but comfortable. He had the unfortunate luck to be born into slavery, to a mother indentured to one of Cheliax's countless noble families. Lem was sold a half dozen times to different nobles before he reached the age of two. Such is the fate of most of Cheliax's halflings (often called slips by that nation's citizens). Halflings are much valued as slaves in Cheliax since...Tags: Bards Halflings Iconics Lem Meet the Iconics Portraits Wayne Reynolds |