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I had this typed up in hopes of seeing r2 of rpg superstar. I felt compelled to post it somewhere. Originally I named it Ghiest Driven, but seeing as how I was struggling to make word count I changed it to Indepted. All comments welcome.
Indebted (Witch)
Indebted (Witch)
Some argue the Black Sisters of Gyronna not only become stronger in death, but will barter for this power. Desperate, disenfranchised people go to great lengths for power, and to the indebted her soul is a tradable commodity.
A witch of Gyronna, or with no religion, having a patron relating to death, darkness, deception, or insanity can take the indebted archetype.
Charisma Dependent: An indebted uses Charisma instead of Intelligence when determining the highest level of spells she can cast, her spell save DCs, number of spells known, and any effects of her hexes normally determined by her Intelligence.
Gheist (Su): At 1st level, the indebted is haunted by a malevolent spirit. The gheist manifests when the indebted communes for power. Her gheist acts in all ways like a witch’s familiar for the purpose of preparing and gaining spells. The gheist is perceivable only by the indebted and only while manifesting; it may not otherwise be interacted with.
When the indebted casts a spell granted by her class, the gheist will manifest itself for a number of rounds equal to the level of the spell cast; casting more spells adds extra rounds to the total. While manifest, some gheists try to claw through to the material plane, some whisper portents of the indebted’s torturous fate, and some simply stare ominously.
No matter how the spirit behaves, its presence is so unnerving as to give the indebted the shaken condition (DC 15 Will negates, +1 for each consecutive round the ghiest is manifest.) Once affected, the indebted remains shaken for the duration of the manifestation. Nothing in life compares with this horror and the indebted is otherwise immune to fear effects.
This ability replaces familiar.
Damned (Ex): At 1st level, when an indebted dies, her gheist instantly claims her soul. Any character attempting to resurrect a slain indebted must succeed at a caster level check equal to 10 + the indebted’s level or the spell fails. That character cannot attempt to resurrect the indebted again until the following day, though other characters can attempt to do so if they please.
Horror Kin (Ex): At 2nd level, an indebted’s repeated exposure to horror physically warps her. She gains a bonus to intimate checks and penalty to diplomacy checks equal to half her class level.
Concentrate Terror (Su): At 8th level, the ghiest bond becomes strong enough to channel its essence. When using the demoralize action, an indebted may increase the fear level generated by increasing the DC of the check by 10 for each step desired. Creatures repeatedly targeted by this ability receive a cumulative +5 bonus to resist.
This ability replaces the witch’s 8th level hex.
The gheist is an interesting approach to the familiar. I like it a lot as a concept!
* I like that it cannot be discerned until manifesting.
*I find the indebted being at risk of being shaken but otherwise immune to fear also interesting. Perhaps at later levels the indebted gets used to her horrifying gheist?
*When manifesting, why don't any others nearby get similarly frightened/shaken effect - I can see that happening with the Concentrate Terror ability - but that ability doesn't specify that the gheist is manifesting.
* Horror Kin has "intimate" rather than "intimidate".
As written, these seems like a great idea, fun concept and first draft. I could see this definitely going somewhere. Try to determine which you like more - an otherworldly gheist that scares it's indebted, or an indebted that has harnessed the gheist and learns from it to producr fear effects from the get go.
Hope any of that helps...
Forgot to add....
Ialso like the Charisma dependent approach personally, and although I can see thematic/flavor reasons why, it isn't made clear in the writeup.
As for Damned, I don't get enough mechanical or thematic for what the geist claiming your soul actually does beyond the difficulty in rezzing... A little bit more exposition there would help the archetype immensely...
Thank you very much for the input.
You are right that I never did a final polish, I would have looked at it again before submitting, "imitate" was just sloppy :P
I figure that the will saves, depending on how she casts, will allow her to become a bit more used to it with time. Her will save will be going up through natural and magical means. Of course if she is spamming spells left and right in favor of hexes, she will regularly fail. I wanted to tie in some drawbacks because there is a lot of potential synergy built in here.
I was really struggling to get all this in under word count, the idea of the gheist is that it is only manifesting to her and no one else perceives it. But over time her repeated exposure to it makes her quite horrific as well, as if its essence is corrupting her.
I did have a bit more flavor on the damned portion originally, but once again the word count was killing me. Like I said in the OP, I actually changed the name of this class to something shorter just to help me fit it all.
I wanted charisma casting for a few reasons. I didn't see this as an intelligent character as much as an "I'm turning my very soul into a shooting star" class. Additionally, the charisma works mechanically better with the other abilities gained.
Thank you once more
Hey no worries Sitri! I figured wordcount was the villain here. Thanks also for your explanations of design decisions...
I'd be interested in seeing this fleshed out and polished. And for what it's worth I like both Indebted and Gheist Driven as archetype names.
There definitely needs to be a greater benefit to having the geist. Right now you have a big drawback (possibly shaken every time she casts a spell) and being difficult to resurrect, but the only benefit she receives at 1st level from this is immunity to fear. Since being shaken is practically a -2 to everything, it's pretty significant. I think just having all enemies within a radius affected would be enough of a counter. Allies would understand that this geist cannot harm them, but enemies will not, and the witch herself is shaken because of what she is feeling.
I did front load the drawbacks on her because she is getting the ability to cause heightened fear effects at level 8. As far as I can tell, that is one level earlier than anyone else can do it with a single reusable ability. Additionally, the fact that she is getting bonuses from her primary stat and the Horror Kin ability to use the fear effect and I felt it needed some tempering somewhere else. I know SKR, or one of the other main people, recommended making trades 1 for 1 instead of loading them at different levels, but I thought this idea was cool enough for the "disregard other recommendations" rule. If you were to add Dazzling Display on this I think it is toying with the "too much benefit" line.