Astaroth,
formerly known as "Asta Rocco", was an obscure clerk at the central office of a milk factory in San Diego, in the 80s, who claimed to have various supernatural powers and physical endowments, largely aimed at making an impression on the luscious (to his lonely eyes) ladies in the office.
When laughed, mocked and taunted by said ladies, who even nicknamed him "Asta Loco", Rocco - inspired as he was by various comic book schemes - decided to travel back in time with the convenient steampunk machine of his gnomish pal (one "Q Lisp"), so as to reach the Jurassic era of Earth.
There, he stole the sacred Saa'm-bo-daar scrolls of the Gruukk'Kkk'Sss' Gggg'Fkaaa dynasty of the Ur-Lizard Kings of Lemuria (causing the downfall of this brilliant arch-evil civilization in the process), and studied them for uncounted millenia.
Finally, sometime around 2000 BC, he mastered the accursed scrolls (which had exponentially increased his natural lifespan in the meantime), and consequentially underwent an apotheosis which transformed him into one of the most prominent arch-fiends in the multiverse.
Then he proceeded to move back-forward in time (stay with me, people) and materialized squarely in the ladies room of the milk factory in 80s San Diego. There, with much sulfur and furor, he proclaimed his hideous evilty of nastiness to Maria, the cleaning lady, for he was Astaroth ! who makes the stars choke and die with terror !
To which the cleaning lady replied "Senor Rocco, you've made a mess of the floor I just cleaned !" before proceeding to shoo him out the room with his mexican mop.
Alone in the hallway, Astaroth woved before the Antigods of the Gaping Kosmos that he would have his eternal revenge on womankind - then promptly vanished in a little puff of smoke when he spotted Luisa and Janice coming towards him along the hallway.
And he never even gave back the steampunk device that he borrowed from his dubious pal Q lisp : what a bummer !
And the next word is :
"vrymocmac"
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Vrymocmac - a Mayan device for removing maize cobs that have "accidentally" found their way into the wrong orifice.
Tehihuatlactaptlotluan
Tehihuatlactaptlotluan is simply incan for "dog". There was a reason people stopped speaking it.
Banjurc
Forneus, n.p. The misspelled name of a southern constellation; occurred in an 16th century almanac produced by Spelunke Donbelodesky.
Flurominator
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Flurominator - one of many insipid-yet-somewhat-sinister "get-'em-while-they're-young" cartoon characters created and pushed in early 1990s America, the Flurominator was an anthropomorphic toothbrush with a bad Austrian accent who appeared on PSAs fighting the green-hued, tooth-decaying Butthead Gang; once he'd defeated them (usually by brushing them to death), he would always end by turning to the camera and speaking in a loud monotone, "Viva La Teeth-a, Baby!"
Foras
Foras
A latin word, meaning "many fora".
"Fora" being the plural form of "forum", "foras" actually meant at the beginning "all the world fora".
Which, by a bizzare linguistic drift, came to mean : "mud wrestling pit with scantily clad warrior women" in the gallo-roman city of Busca, in southern France. This snazzy linguistic innovation later circulated in the entire roman empire.
Finally, in our time of advanced technological wizardry, "foras" means "mud pit with scantily clad warrior women (armed with ceramic-coated blenders) fighting and tweeting at the same time".
Clearly, our civilization has improved in ways undreamed of by our rustic ancestors !
And the next word is:
"Fumbolous"
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Fumbolous - what you get when you cross Liberace with the giant from 'Jack and the Beanstalk'
Gannerupt
Gannerupt
The kind of rapture you feel when you make sweet love to your paramour in the heart of a giant red star going super nova.
Oops !
I lost myself for a moment there...
Ahem : ertovalysh
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ertovalysh - a distinctive variety of qlippoth-skin handbag; extremely resilient in almost all conditions, and capable of exceptional carrying capacity while remaining comfortable to carry, one must be very careful not to store family photographs inside, as they inevitably come out...changed....
Asmoday
Asmoday - two days before Cosmo Day
Papurhun
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Papurhun : the ominous word every butterfly says before dying ; its meaning remains obscure, despite Professor Klugoff bold theory that it means "a kind of blue ganola".
Arotismosis
Arotismosis, n. The process by which technogenetic information is exchanged among the von Neuman/lepidopterae of Kartimus III.
Panvalsimax
Gaap : the space between two ideas.
Alsanamaer
Furfur:
A 12.56 m diameter pit in the ground, dug in celebration of Spring's rains by the cyber-equipped tribe of provolved badgers named "the Banung".
It is customary for yound adult banungs to swim in the furfur while rythmically twisting their satellite dish cranial extensions aimed at the sun's course in the sky. Meanwhile, the younglings enthusiastically play with patches of moist earth around the pit, while the adults play tri-chess and the elder banungs compute and exchange elaborate riddles with their paw-paw terminals.
molbrough
Molbrough - the highest form of praise it was possible for a 17th Century English Wig-Charmer to employ.
"Arh, that were a proper Molbrough, Seth"
"Thankee, Ephraim. They'm woild when they ent 'ad their magic oats, but oi fixed 'ee! There don't be a wig aloive what can stand against Seth Parker! Hee! Hee!"
Kughley.
Kughley, Kandimus (1896 - 1823?) Theoretical mathematician and non-Euclidean geometer; infamous for drawing erotic marginalia while listening to Bach's "Air on a G String". His work may or may not have influenced Heisenberg.
Improbaballistics
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Improbaballistics - The study and manufacture of cartoonishly big guns.
Hengswallah
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Kaltullery - coined by an unknown Leipzig University professor during Germany's golden age of science and culture in the 19th Century, a term, ranging in connotation from amicably pejorative to condemnatory, for less-than-scientific use of liquid nitrogen and other cryogenic substances, which could include anything from making ice cream to, "Drink this, it's a hangover cure I just invented!"
Marchosias
Marchosias - (sometimes spelled Marchosius) - a 4th-Century BCE poet, born in Damascus, known for having been born, married, consecrated to the gods, died, and whose children were all born in the third month of the year, through a series of simple luck, missteps, coincidence and a supposed obsession with rolling dice to determine his most important life decisions.
Wodnipe
Wodnip - The ex God of Hellfire ( A. Brown, c. 1967), sacked for bringing you Deep Heat and teaching you to rub instead of doing his job properly
Habatrubh
Habatrubh
The demonic counterpart of H'burtabah, the semi-goddes of cuddles and snugggles. It is said that Habatrubh likes to hide between sheets to pinch bottoms ; for that, he's sometimes dubbed "the Pincer in the Dark".
salkateker
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salkateker - in the classical Greek cosmology, the 9th Wind, coming somehow from the center and bringing rains of frogs, rains of fish, and, conspicuously, a phenomenon that shows up only once in surviving texts, but translates to something very much like "anal probing."
Stolas
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Stolas- A small bench at the base of an altar which many think is to be knelt on while praying, but is actually meant to be the footstool for the diety to which the altar is dedicated, kneeling on the Stolas is punishable by being beaten with a cucumber.
Fyjjellid
Phoenix - commonly confused with the mythical bird, this erudite purple being is the reason why ponies exist. Some wizards and summoners give praise to this being for maximizing the effectiveness of a first-order spell.
Kauhey
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Kauhey- A now extinct bird that once lived near Hawaii, marked by their extreme resilience, their extinction was brought about by their inability to differentiate between lava and water, thus resulting in birds drowning to death.
Bhehloshtint
A type of early substance used to tint metal during the 4th century in areas of what is now southern Albania. It appears to have been made from crushed Bhehlosh beetles, a type of extinct insect. The only documentation of it has it produce a thoroughly pink colour.
Gebberom
Gebberom - also known as the Lesser Key Lime Pie of Solomon.
Kanathakarna
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Kanathakarna - the Nepalese Hindu goddess of stubbing one's feet and all things relating to it; honored on regular intervals, according to an obscure sidereal calendar used by almost nobody outside Her clergy, with small festivals featuring dancing, martial arts competitions, and three-legged races, all of which invoke the same distinctive hopping style; somewhat disturbingly, the CEO of the LEGO Group keeps an exquisite statuette of Her in his office in Billund, Denmark....
Halphas
Halphas - an interjection originating from Medieval Denmark coined when a group of peasants shouted this at the top of their lungs over and over again outside of an ancient fortified castle while being chased by an entire army of enemy troops. Originally meaning 'Watch out! There's an entire army just outside your door!', it has come to mean 'There's a jerk outside' in modern parlance.
Sambrare
Sambrare, n. A species of fish which is closely related to the stonefish of Southeast Asia, but which is fortunately extremely rare. The venom is powerful enough to cause paralysis of the central nervous system in fully-grown kaiju.
Chumetatl
Chumetatl - a popular 'filler word' in 1950s Chicano doo-wop records, ie:
"Oo boppa luchy ba, chumetatl ding dong", etc.
Only Jerry Falwell realised it was a SECRET COMMUNIST CODE WORD!
Smaragdine
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Smaragdine - of all the evil big corporations out there in the world, agribusiness and petroleum giant Smaragdine is the only one secretly run by a school of sardines; yes, the agribusiness and petroleum industries are both very bad for fish - but sardines aren't very smart. Sardines with MBAs are even less so.
Malphas
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Malphas:
a mask with only one side ; used by the belgian sect of Brünnlod (a small gnostic village in the mountains south of Lake Geneva) during its ultra-secret initiation ceremony.
When donning the mask, one makes his/her own face momentarily disappear in the "non-inside" part of the mask - the shock of this moment is said to give access to many hidden secrets of the universe, the most notorious of them supposedly being the original recipe of belgian chocolate, lost during the 1800s during the accidental death of Ludwig van den Pool II, pastry chef extraordinaire, while he was crossing Central america in board his enigmatic chutzpa-mobile.
Wavamang
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Wavamang- A drink made from powdered elephant horn and king cobra venom, mixed with vodka and prune juice, it is illegal in many countries.
Vepperring
Raum - A special kind of sap harvested from the thorns of the Raumshik flower. While lethal in small quantities and virtually undetectable before ingestion, upon consumption the victim will enter a state of euphoria before dying. The bliss gained from this state is so great that many have gladly faced death for it and it is, in fact, a rather popular form of euthanasia.
Fulek
Fulek: a 3-thumbed australian monkey. Very rare.
Not to be confused with folek, which designates a drunken batavian sailor in the port of Amsterdam occupied to pee along a wall (and, frequently, on his shoes).
Unrelated to falek, a verb which means "munching on his lips so as not to scream after having inadvertently hammered one's hand rather than the intented nail." E.g: "I swear, Cindy, that I'd rather falek myself than dating that guy ! He's a total dweeby creep !"
bolbosam
Focalor-a crystal placed in ancient machines in order to conduct magical energies in order to produce a map of powerful artifacts. Exposure to such machines can cause extreme paranoia, and possible incineration by insulted champions of the gods.
Quinjooryahsht
Deznogud- an interjection shouted when something unexpected and unwelcome happens.
Forrellneckt
Forrellneckt - the latin word for what happens at the end of a drop from the gallows.
Fleashent