8 word Lord of the Rings Game

[Mothman]

haunch. That Sam always looked tasty,” mused the

[Heathansson]

voracious saurian behemoth. He began to salivate, slobbering

[Aberzombie]

profusely and licking his scaly lips. Galadriel

[Mothman]

took this as a come on, and, liking

[waltero]

her odds with the beast, turned Celeborn into

[Aberzombie]

the local authorities for some questionable activities involving

[waltero]

elves under the age of 587. "Cradle robber

[Patrick Curtin]

screamed the mob. "400 will get you 20!"

[Mothman]

“It’s well known that I like older women,”

[Charles Evans 25]

Smaug salivated. Then Ancalagon the Chartreuse triumphantly arrived.

[Jal Dorak]

He fired a "Black Arrow"TM, robbing Bard of

[Aberzombie]

his belt pouch and causing an uproar among

[Heathansson]

the assembled crowd of half elven cheerleaders who

[Devin Swift]

of course were all under 400, and drew

[Aberzombie]

from their experiences in the "hospitality" industry whenever

[Jal Dorak]

somebody saved the day yet again, unless it

[Aberzombie]

happened to be Thursday, then the world could

[waltero]

be covered in a second darkness with impunity.

[Patrick Curtin]

Smaug and Ancalagon fell to bickering over who

[Mothman]

had played the biggest role in the second

[Charles Evans 25]

age- Galadriel or Gil-Galad? Sauron they (naturally) discounted.
I'm assuming that Gil-Galad counts as one word here, being a hyphenated name. If it should properly be counted as two words, please ignore the naturally.

[Beaver Cleaver]

because he did it with a llama

[Jal Dorak]

Sauron was booted from Valinor for llama policies.

[Mothman]

In the Shire, they knew little of such

[Charles Evans 25]

humilations, being too busy eating, smoking and dancing.

[Jal Dorak]

Every day in the shire was somebodies "eleventyfirst",

[Mothman]

a serious social problem, the ageing population caused

[Crimson Jester]

a shortage on the finest pipe weed in

[waltero]

three counties. Stoned seniors roamed the streets in

[Mothman]

near mindless packs, looting stores and upturning crops

[Heathansson]

while waiting for their viagra to kick in

[Charles Evans 25]

until 'sheriff' Thorin Oakenshield arrived to restore order.

[Jal Dorak]

"Order" being a code-word for "regular beatings",

[Mothman]

which he administered with uncharacteristic joy, using a

[Patrick Curtin]

small hobbit named Winky Bracegirdle who he wrapped

[waltero]

in a mithril gimpsuit, given to him by

[Patrick Curtin]

His father Thrain Latexshield, a notorious Hobbit abuser.

[waltero]

Thorin's scouring of the shire caught Saruman's eye.

[Patrick Curtin]

There's a Dwarf I need to party with!

[houstonderek]

tim, tim benzedrine!!! (oh, wait..."lord" not "bored"...)

[Mothman]

Sauruman realised it was past time to take

[Spanky the Leprechaun]

a little ride to go see his aunt

[Jal Dorak]

Flo. This was in fact his deepest secret,

[Joey Lafyatis]

that he conversed with relatives, which was against

[Patrick Curtin]

the Wizard's Guild Code. Saruman faced loss of

[waltero]

his rent-controlled Orthanc apartment if caught. Radagast coveted

[Charles Evans 25]

that apartment after living in Mirkwood for centuries.

[Joey Lafyatis]

Of course, one had to get around, so

[Joey Lafyatis]

Of course, one had to get around, so

[Jal Dorak]

this was why Sauron created the Uruk-Hai,