I don't think the boards' unofficial standards of PG-13 would handle it. Trust me on this one, m'kay? O.o
I don't think the boards' unofficial standards of PG-13 would handle it. Trust me on this one, m'kay? O.o
Lilith's seen a smidge...probably a smidge too much for her own good.
I don't think people would still like me if I posted any of it...honestly. James is a good man for curbing my twisted imagination.
Lilith's seen a smidge...probably a smidge too much for her own good.
Can't...get...it out...of my mind!
*curls up in a fetal position in the corner*
Bring it on I say. <weg>
Or, there's an idea ... how about a PDF-download of such ravings and dementia (for a nominal fee of course) for such things? Mayhap the 'my account' dooflichie already contains some sort of age verification (to accomodate the "M+" rating materials...).
What a pity he can't tell. The suspense of not knowing feels great, though.
But hey, you want to spice up your campaign? Your players have strong stomachs? Turin, you're MAD, MAD, MAD. You can bring the horror back, dude.
I promise you'll get many mad meanderings into the sicko-depths of my mind just by reading my posts on these boards, for free. :-)
Someday I'll write a true mature-audiences RPG...till then...let your own twisted imaginations work for ya. Go to those dark places, don't be afraid, once you're there, nothing can scare you anymore.
It's like when I was afraid of the dark as a kid, so I made myself wander around in the dark for hours every night, until I realized I WAS the thing in the darkness I was afraid of. Now that's all I'm afraid of, what I might do with a keyboard at my fingertips. ;-)
I, too, would crave an uncut version.
Maybe if it had a disclaimer on it? I think perhaps a limited run of, say, 1,000 copies hand signed by Mr. Logue himself? Maybe a contest, where this would be the prize?
If we could get an uncut version some day, I want some pickies.
Personally, I'm gonna have those ogres go deliverance on that Jakardros guy: "Squeal like a pig, ranger boy!" --If the PCs stealth in they'll walk in on it. Now I can get worse than that, but my players would probably leave the table.
Getting sodomized by an ogre would help explain the state of mind he's in after the ordeal.
Umm did I violate the PG-13 code?
|
I don't think the boards' unofficial standards of PG-13 would handle it. Trust me on this one, m'kay? O.oLilith's seen a smidge...probably a smidge too much for her own good.
I don't think people would still like me if I posted any of it...honestly. James is a good man for curbing my twisted imagination.
I'd like you. I'd like you even more.
Pett would like you....(although,...I am playing in the AP. Please do not forward it to Aubrey the Malformed; I'm frightened.)
If you replace every other word with "rape" or "lusty" or "drool" or "violation" you pretty much get the uncut version.
Jepro and Katra...shudder.
So,....those ogre hooks really gikk me out right about now.
You're on the right track Heath, as always.
Contributor
|
You know, I shared a hotel room with Nick at Origins, and everything I've tried to write since then has a sick and horrific twist. I've heard people say "I've looked into the abyss, and it was looking back." Well, I've looked into the abyss, and now the abyss looks out of me! Don't walk that road!
The uncut version would drive you MAD!
MAD!
Mammy Graul rarely moves beyond
the walls of her reeking bedroom, letting her boys see to her
needs—all of them. She’s birthed dozens of strong ogrekin sons
over the decades, and although her childbearing days are now
behind her, she still enjoys visits from her sons and the occasional
ogre from the highlands.Nice.
Deliverance comes to mind, plus that XFiles where the mother lives under the bed.
Complete with inbred children ... Mamma Graul is a ... unpleasant woman I would guess. ^_^
|
Personally, I'm gonna have those ogres go deliverance on that Jakardros guy: "Squeal like a pig, ranger boy!" --If the PCs stealth in they'll walk in on it. Now I can get worse than that, but my players would probably leave the table.
Getting sodomized by an ogre would help explain the state of mind he's in after the ordeal.
Umm did I violate the PG-13 code?
Oh, God; flashback time...
We had a DM who had this as a party-piece.
Every replacement PC would be found bound and naked in a cell with a satsuma in his mouth...
You know, I shared a hotel room with Nick...
Uhhhh, yeah.
I've looked into the abyss
In the hotel room. Yeah.
Don't walk that road!
Don't worry, I'm not into "that road".
;)
Just funnin' ya!
I don't think people would still like me if I posted any of it...honestly. James is a good man for curbing my twisted imagination.
My gaming group has already determined that we are, in fact, going to one of the lowest levels of the Abyss.
I'm game!
Maybe an "annotated works" in the PDF...
I had a shadowrun group where the GM had the party captured and raped. Every session until we got revenge, he would play "Comanche" the Duane Whitaker/Peter Green/Revels song used in the "gimp" scene in Pulp Fiction. The satisfaction we felt when we finally mashed them with monofilament made it all worthwhile. Cathartic.
Well, we had McWoD - Monte Cook's World of Darkness, so we might as well get NlHoL - Nicolas Logue's Human Occupied Landfill
If you replace every other word with "rape" or "lusty" or "drool" or "violation" you pretty much get the uncut version.
Hm... let me try that with the HMM:
"Adventure Rape:
The lusty inbred drool of the Violation clanhold have long raped the lusty or foolhardy drool who violate to survive in the rape of Drool Mountain."
Who do I make the sanity points out to?
Well, we had McWoD - Monte Cook's World of Darkness, so we might as well get NlHoL - Nicolas Logue's Human Occupied Landfill
If you replace every other word with "rape" or "lusty" or "drool" or "violation" you pretty much get the uncut version.
Hm... let me try that with the HMM:
"Adventure Rape:
The lusty inbred drool of the Violation clanhold have long raped the lusty or foolhardy drool who violate to survive in the rape of Drool Mountain."Who do I make the sanity points out to?
Hilarious! It works! :-)
::Nick merrily collects twenty sanity points::
I've run Delta Green games that caused one of my players to go back onto medication (She should have told me about the panic dosorder before the game, mind you...)
We can handle the peril.
::Nick merrily collects twenty sanity points::
So that should mean that you have about twenty sanity points in total now?
Still a world with a slightly sane-ish Logue could mean a world with sub-par adventures, and nobody wants that. Bring on the delirium!Shame that you can't release the uncut version.... *cough* email it *cough* please *cough*
That's what I was about to suggest, too. If you can't post it to the boards, Nick, would you be willing to make it available via e-mail? It'd really be a shame to see your creativity go to waste :).
Yeah. We'll also sign disclaimers that neither you nor Paizo will be held responsible and/or liable if any of us goes bankrupt on medications, kills a dozen preschool squirrels with an electrical toothbrush, or has to go to group therapy all by himself because he has to develop two dozen additional personalities to cope with what you send us.
Heh. Really, I'd love to guys, but really, I can't do it. It's just too f&$@ing sick. I feel dirty for writing it even. F&%%ing sick. Horribly sick. I just re-read some of it thinking I might post a tidbit, and I threw up in my mouth a little. I write a lot these days, and I quickly forget what I've written, and after re-reading the original section on Jeppo, Sugar and Hograth, I was like: "Why Nick!? Why did you write that!!!"
Heh. Really, I'd love to guys, but really, I can't do it. It's just too f&&*ing sick. I feel dirty for writing it even. f&&*ing sick. Horribly sick. I just re-read some of it thinking I might post a tidbit, and I threw up in my mouth a little. I write a lot these days, and I quickly forget what I've written, and after re-reading the original section on Jeppo, Sugar and Hograth, I was like: "Why Nick!? Why did you write that!!!"
Like a letter to [insert dirty mag here] for ogres...
Heh. Really, I'd love to guys, but really, I can't do it. It's just too f&!*ing sick. I feel dirty for writing it even. f&!*ing sick. Horribly sick. I just re-read some of it thinking I might post a tidbit, and I threw up in my mouth a little. I write a lot these days, and I quickly forget what I've written, and after re-reading the original section on Jeppo, Sugar and Hograth, I was like: "Why Nick!? Why did you write that!!!"
You know, by saying this you only make us want it more :-)
|
|
My imagination is running down some sick and twisted corridors as well. In descending order of vileness:
Rukus Graul's single digit and mammy's "needs".
The dwarf with the tiny ass (page 56) is offering a show a la Tijuana Mexico.
The hags attempt a "coup de etat" by trying to trick the pcs using their feminine wiles and convincing the pc's to "save them" from Barl. I may need a hat of disguise to pull that off...
So you're telling us you invented the written version of snuff movies and don't want to share?
You're probably right. It would make us go and torture magazines and kill books.
Personally, I could've gone my whole life without that picture of Mammy Graul on p. 19. It's seared into my brain.
This adventure inspired me to immediately begin looking through the Book of Vile Darkness for stuff to pimp it out.
Gragavan and Petter, eh Nick?
Heh. Really, I'd love to guys, but really, I can't do it. It's just too f!&*ing sick. I feel dirty for writing it even. f!&*ing sick. Horribly sick. I just re-read some of it thinking I might post a tidbit, and I threw up in my mouth a little. I write a lot these days, and I quickly forget what I've written, and after re-reading the original section on Jeppo, Sugar and Hograth, I was like: "Why Nick!? Why did you write that!!!"
So, FATAL D20 then? Sounds...unpleasant.
With that forward you knew something was going to ask for it.
Let's have the uncut, pure warped mind Logue version of "Hook Mountain Massacre"
Oh dear God!!! I have a child I would happily sacrifice for a free pdf update of the directors cut.
Besides, surely if you have to pay as a subscriber with a credit card it shows your over 18 anyway (Either that or you have an understanding parent lol)
After reading through the encounters with Hograth et all, as well as the Foreward by Mr. Jacobs and the posts on this thread, I was struck with the idea of modeling those three NPCs off of a few minor characters from the comic Preacher (specifically, War in the Sun.
That said, there is a lot of material to draw from, for this adventure, given the current popularity of Horror films.
..the idea of modeling those three NPCs off of a few minor characters from the comic Preacher (specifically, War in the Sun).
ROFL! These are the same guys I was thinkin' about too. No Mammy Graul, though.
Oh, c'mon folks, you're not really buying this "Oooh, Nick wrote something really, really ookey" routine, are you?
It looks to me like Nick and James are trying way too hard to sell this story. See, what I think happened is, Nick's manuscript arrived in James' in-box, and when he flipped through it, it had sunshine-and-happiness ogrekin and free-love ogres everywhere. Happy fey nymph friends of everyone. Love and plentiful gooey chocolate cookies.
And James realized two things:
1) This adventure was too "care-bears"-compatible to publish.
2) If anyone ever learned what Nick had written, they'd never be willing to buy anything the poor guy wrote, ever again.
So he took into account Nick's situation (marriage, cross-country move, et.al.) and he decided to re-write the whole thing (possibly with Pett's help, I mean, they may not get along, but even Pett is capable of feeling pity for the poor guy), and then convince everyone that Nick's version had been So-Much-Kewler!
And I feel sorry for the poor guy too, with all his care-bears-and-lollipops creativity, but I feel that the truth must come out. I'm sorry to have to be the one to reveal the horrible truth, but I just couldn't stay silent any longer.
(And as for Lilith and the others who pretend they've seen the uncut version - really, people, is even Paizo worth perjuring yourselves for? You should be ashamed...)
Oh, c'mon folks, you're not really buying this "Oooh, Nick wrote something really, really ookey" routine, are you?
It looks to me like Nick and James are trying way too hard to sell this story. See, what I think happened is, Nick's manuscript arrived in James' in-box, and when he flipped through it, it had sunshine-and-happiness ogrekin and free-love ogres everywhere. Happy fey nymph friends of everyone. Love and plentiful gooey chocolate cookies.
And James realized two things:
1) This adventure was too "care-bears"-compatible to publish.
2) If anyone ever learned what Nick had written, they'd never be willing to buy anything the poor guy wrote, ever again.So he took into account Nick's situation (marriage, cross-country move, et.al.) and he decided to re-write the whole thing (possibly with Pett's help, I mean, they may not get along, but even Pett is capable of feeling pity for the poor guy), and then convince everyone that Nick's version had been So-Much-Kewler!
And I feel sorry for the poor guy too, with all his care-bears-and-lollipops creativity, but I feel that the truth must come out. I'm sorry to have to be the one to reveal the horrible truth, but I just couldn't stay silent any longer.
(And as for Lilith and the others who pretend they've seen the uncut version - really, people, is even Paizo worth perjuring yourselves for? You should be ashamed...)
::Nick sheds a rainbow gum-drop tear on his original manuscript for Love Mountain Sing-A-Long::
Love-Mountain Care-Bear Sing-A-Long?
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
There go my final sanity points. Actually, I'm in debt now. If I don't get dried frog pills right now, I'll start to go reall--AND IT'S A BEAUT DAY LADIES AND GENTS FOR THIS YEAR'S KARAOKE-POWERED ORNAMENTAL SHRUB FAST GROWING! HOLY CHRIST I BURST WITH ANTICIPATION SEDATE ME RIGHT NOW OR I'LL EAT A HAMSTER!