In Paris, the survivors of the Saint Valentine's Day Holocaust mourn for the deaths of hundreds by poison gas blown upon them by the green wyrm Grünerraver, who then plundered the riches of the City of Lights before flying back to its cavern lair in the Black Forest. Nicolas Flamel died defending his home city against Grünerraver, horrifically mauled over the Champs-Élysées by the dragon, though Cat Lord PusInBoots gave three of his remaining four lives to protect the Alchemist. In the end, PusInBoots was forced to flee to fight another day, with only the last of his nine lives barely intact.
Nicolas Flamel, alchemist wrote: Signor Pusinboots wrote: Grünerraver the Green Wyrm wrote: At this very moment in Paris, Grünerraver, Green Wyrm of the Black Forest, falls upon the unprepared city with its lethal gaseous breath, filling the streets and plazas of the City of Lights with a green fog of death! The heroes of Paris quickly rise to her defense...
Cat Lord PusInBoots seeks out Nicolas Flamel, finding him hovering on a flying carpet above Notre Dame Cathedral, flinging lightning bolts at the green wyrm!
Bonjour, Monsieur Flamel! A pretty fine day for dragon slaying, non!? Hurling a bright blue bolt of lightning that scars the green wyrm's yellowish underbelly: Ah, it is you, Monsieur PusInBoots! Quickly! We must stop this menace from killing any more innocent Parisians! Innocent Parisians, you say!? Hahaha! You make me laugh, Monsieur! But, oui, we shall kill zis beast for France!
PusInBoots quaffs a potion of fly and takes to the air, soaring rapier-first toward the green wyrm...
Grünerraver the Green Wyrm wrote: At this very moment in Paris, Grünerraver, Green Wyrm of the Black Forest, falls upon the unprepared city with its lethal gaseous breath, filling the streets and plazas of the City of Lights with a green fog of death! The heroes of Paris quickly rise to her defense...
Cat Lord PusInBoots seeks out Nicolas Flamel, finding him hovering on a flying carpet above Notre Dame Cathedral, flinging lightning bolts at the green wyrm!
Bonjour, Monsieur Flamel! A pretty fine day for dragon slaying, non!?
Johann Kaltgeboren wrote: "So Foxy... then the Cat appears as if from no where to save our hides! With a swipe swipe here, and a swipe swipe there... Dead dragon, and now look at my beautiful dragon scalearmor. Different dragons of course. Uh, what were you doing in the upstairs room anyway? Nothing... incriminating I hope. I would hate for what's-her-name to be mad at you and come crawling to me! I might just have to give her what she wants, if you know what I mean!"
Johann, fully drunk, wipes his slobber and spilled saki off his lips and starts another song with Pusinboots. He ends it by turning into a snake and wrapping around Mwikali and smacking her on the butt with his tail, then heads to basement to find some mice.
Before he teleports to Paris...
Monsieur Le Bear, zat dragon scale samurai armor makes you look ridiculous! I have somezing that will better fit you until you learn how to wear zat monstrosity without looking silly...
Pulling out of his handy haversack a suit of medium armor, Bearskin Shirt, +2 wild hide armor, he drops the furry panoply at Johann's feet...
Joyeux Noël, Mister Bear! Ziss magic fur shirt of zee berserkers of Midgard will suit you much better for a time, I think...
As he begins to sober up, the Cat Lord declares: And now, Mon amis, I must depart to Paris... If you are going to the City of Lights as well, take hold of me and hitch a ride! Otherwise, I must bid zee adieu!
The Cat Lord smiles fondly at each of the adventurers, embraces each, with a kiss on each cheek, and then hands to Mwikali a scroll of greater teleport. He then reads another himself, and vanishes in a pooof of smoke that smells of frankincense...
Innkeeper at the Jade Dragon wrote: Signor Pusinboots wrote: Aagh!! Mon head... it rings like zee bells of Notre Dame... Bloody ricewine... Never again... Must get some breakfast... some creme... *BLEEAAARRRGGGHH!!* Cat Lord PusInBoots vomits at the thought of cream in his belly... Non! Non! Non! Not creme...
After dunking his furry head in the water trough for mounts outside the inn, Cat Lord PusInBoots feels more himself, and orders breakfast noodles with chicken for everyone in the party...
That'll be 10 golden tael, Cat Daimyo! says the innkeeper, bowing and smiling... Plucking a 1,000-gold-piece emerald seemingly from behind the innkeeper's ear with a sleight-of-hand unrivaled among tricksters, the Cat Lord overpays the innkeeper, kisses her on the lips, and says, Merci, Madame... no more fried cat... for me, oui?
Aagh!! Mon head... it rings like zee bells of Notre Dame... Bloody ricewine... Never again... Must get some breakfast... some creme... *BLEEAAARRRGGGHH!!* Cat Lord PusInBoots vomits at the thought of cream in his belly... Non! Non! Non! Not creme...
After dunking his furry head in the water trough for mounts outside the inn, Cat Lord PusInBoots feels more himself, and orders breakfast noodles with chicken for everyone in the party...
Innkeeper at the Jade Dragon wrote: Signor Pusinboots wrote: Innkeeper at the Jade Dragon wrote: The innkeeper seems both surprised and happy to see the gaijin she thought dead for certain return to the Jade Dragon along with another, a kitsune...
Japanese: Welcome back, travelers! Long time, no see, hai? Hahahahaha!! Come in! Make yourselves at home! We have delicious noodles in house special broth, with hibachi grilled shrimp, chicken, beef, dog, cat, or octopus!
The innkeeper, curious and in wonder about how the gaijin survived the infamous "hospitality" of the Shogun, serves them a heroes feast indeed... The bottles of saki are drained by the dozens, and an epic celebration ensues!
A moment of tension:
Japanese: Cat, Madame!? You serve hibachi grilled CAT!? The Cat Lord swashbuckler does not seem amused! Aware that she has grievously offended her honored guest, the innkeeper kowtows to the Cat Lord, pleading in Japanese: A thousand pardons, honorable Cat Daimyo... We will cease this barbarous practice from now on, I swear!
Bluff 1d20+11 Sense Motive 1d20 + 29 ⇒ (1) + 29 = 30 blows the innkeeper's Bluff check out of the water!
You are lying to appease me, Madame, but I will accept your apology, and keep the peace. The Cat Lord PusInBoots sits down and orders noodles with fried chicken.
Innkeeper at the Jade Dragon wrote: The innkeeper seems both surprised and happy to see the gaijin she thought dead for certain return to the Jade Dragon along with another, a kitsune...
Japanese: Welcome back, travelers! Long time, no see, hai? Hahahahaha!! Come in! Make yourselves at home! We have delicious noodles in house special broth, with hibachi grilled shrimp, chicken, beef, dog, cat, or octopus!
The innkeeper, curious and in wonder about how the gaijin survived the infamous "hospitality" of the Shogun, serves them a heroes feast indeed... The bottles of saki are drained by the dozens, and an epic celebration ensues!
A moment of tension:
Japanese: Cat, Madame!? You serve hibachi grilled CAT!? The Cat Lord swashbuckler does not seem amused!
Johann Kaltgeboren wrote: "AW... STAY FOR JUST A BIT LONGER, SIGNOR PUSINBOOTS. FOR WE HAVE SAVED THE FOX AND DEFEATED THE SHOGUN. TONIGHT...WE DRINK! WE SING! WE TELL STORIES!"
After the party stows all the loot, Johann tries to encourage all to come back to the inn for a night of saki and drunken tavern shanties.
Who could say non to such an offer! Oui! Tonight we revel, to celebrate zee liberation of zee Ogon Fox from zee wicked Shogun Oni Yoshinori, whom we rightfully saw executed by his own hand! Hip hip hurray!!
The Cat Lord PusInBoots insists as well on a night of carousing at the Jade Dragon Inn!
I have with me a couple scrolls of greater teleport sto- um, borrowed from the Archmage Merlin of Wales... I shall give you one as a parting gift, Mon amis... I do not desire any of zeez treasures... I am as rich as I need to be already... If you wish to hitch a ride with me, I am on my way home to Paris...
Two rooms remain in the Ghost Tower of Flower Palace, Y and Z... I will fast-forward us through to Z, as the trap in Y will seem anticlimactic in hindsight, and Signór Pusinboots can trigger it without dying...
Ah! So good to see my old drinking partners once more, Monsieurs Bear et Fox! purrs the Cat... I shall scout ahead...
Dashing through the sliding doors at the far side of Fox's cell, PusInBoots enters the narrow hallway beyond... Turning a corner out of sight, he triggers a terrible trap!
*WWWWAAAAAAAAAAIIIIILLLLL!!!* The hideous kerning of a banshee echoes within the next chamber, and PusInBoots yowls in alarm! MEEEOOOOOWWWW!!!
Wail of the banshee attempts to beat Cat's SR 26...1d20 + 21 ⇒ (5) + 21 = 26 succeeds! PusInBoots attempts a Fort save vs DC 23...1d20 + 16 ⇒ (13) + 16 = 29 saves! The effects of this deadly trap do not extend to Jorogumo's chamber, so the party is fortunately spared!
A moment later, PusInBoots appears in the doorway, fur standing straight up, and says, All clear, Mon amis!
Irish Farewell, cursed cape wrote: Signor Pusinboots wrote: Irish Farewell, cursed cape wrote: Leggo, ye big oaf!! I be a CURSED cape o' the mountebank, ken ye... Y'canno tear me off! OWCH!! A voice with a distinctly Irish brogue comes from the multicolored cape around Fox's neck... Then perhaps you can be cut free of our friend Fox, aye, cape? Hold it taut, Monsieur Le Bear...
Pusinboots raises Cat's Paw over the cursed cape... NAY!! STOP, YE BLASTED FOOL KITTY!! You are just magical cloth, silly cape! You shouldn't feel a thing! Now, hold still...
The Cat pretends to slash at the cape near Fox's neck, purring with mirth...
I jest, Mon ami! he says, sliding his magic rapier back into its scabbard at his side...
Then, looking around, he asks, Where did zee beautiful angel of death go? Searching high and low, he adds, Maybe she went with Lord Perpireen to check on zee underworld imperial dragon, no?
Irish Farewell, cursed cape wrote: Leggo, ye big oaf!! I be a CURSED cape o' the mountebank, ken ye... Y'canno tear me off! OWCH!! A voice with a distinctly Irish brogue comes from the multicolored cape around Fox's neck... Then perhaps you can be cut free of our friend Fox, aye, cape? Hold it taut, Monsieur Le Bear...
Pusinboots raises Cat's Paw over the cursed cape...
ROUND 2:
The Cat is clearly grappling an invisible opponent two (or three) times his size, on the bed, causing silken pillows to fly off the bed as if on their own accord!
Unveil to zee ozers, or I pluck out your eyeballs, Monsieur le Shogun!
The Cat seems to know (or think he knows) where the invisible oni's eyes are, as he poises Cat's Paw menacingly...
Bound Bone Devil wrote: ROUND 1:
A large, insect-like, skeletal devil suddenly appears in the bedchamber, next to the canopied bed, and hisses... SSSSSS-S-S-S-SSS
Fear aura 5 ft, DC 19, 1d6 rounds...
The Cat, detecting but immune to the devil's fear aura, scoffs: Votre ami osseux ne me fait pas peur, monsieur Shogun!
In one acrobatic movement, the Cat slashes through the silk canopy, pouncing on the invisible oni lying on the bed!
Sortir! Sortir! Où que tu sois! HEE HEE HEEE!!
Signór Pusinboots dashes in behind Johann...
Kon'nichiwa, Mademoiselle Ninja!
Acrobatic jump 1d20 + 50 ⇒ (14) + 50 = 64
Cat's Paw 1d20 + 30 ⇒ (3) + 30 = 33 pierces the wounded baykok dealing 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (4) + 11 = 15 plus 1 bleed damage after springing up onto the overlook...
Initiative 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (16) + 11 = 27
Don't hog all zee arrows, Monsieur Le Bear!
The Cat joins Johann on the stairs as he sees baykok arrows raining down on the big fellow from above...
As if to demonstrate, PusInBoots drives the point home with his magic rapier Cat's Paw... 1d20 + 30 ⇒ (14) + 30 = 44 deals 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (4) + 11 = 15 piercing damage plus 1 bleed... 1d20 + 25 ⇒ (8) + 25 = 33 deals 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (3) + 11 = 14 piercing damage plus 1 bleed... 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (19) + 20 = 39 confirm 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (14) + 20 = 34 crits dealing 2d6 + 22 ⇒ (3, 2) + 22 = 27 piercing damage plus 1 bleed... 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (4) + 15 = 19 deals 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (3) + 11 = 14 piercing damage plus 1 bleed...
Seeming to emerge suddenly from the shadows, Pus-in-Boots thrusts at the ninja with Cat's Paw... 1d20 + 30 ⇒ (1) + 30 = 31 misses! Oops!... 1d20 + 25 ⇒ (16) + 25 = 41 deals 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (5) + 11 = 16 piercing damage plus 1 bleed! 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (6) + 20 = 26 deals 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (6) + 11 = 17 piercing damage plus 1 bleed! 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (8) + 15 = 23 deals 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (6) + 11 = 17 piercing damage plus 1 bleed!
Goodnight, sweetheart! Haha!
Monsieur Bear! Shall we collect masks for our friend Fox?
The Cat is a blur of metal and gray fur as he plucks oni spirit masks off of Johann... 1d20 + 30 ⇒ (18) + 30 = 48 confirm 1d20 + 30 ⇒ (16) + 30 = 46 crits! The oni falls silent, skewered... 1d20 + 25 ⇒ (20) + 25 = 45 confirm 1d20 + 25 ⇒ (7) + 25 = 32 crits! The other oni is skewered as well... 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (10) + 20 = 30 as is one on Ihrin... 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (4) + 15 = 19 and the other on Ihrin...
Look, Monsieur Bear! Shishkabob!
Holding up his rapier, the Cat in Boots displays four impaled masks...
Irrate meows: Posez le tuyau de hachage et distribuez-moi, monsieur MJ66!
Initiative 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (19) + 11 = 30
PusInBoots spies the young Japanese man approaching the Flower Palace (Abe no Toshiro).
Now, who's this chap? He's got a determined look upon his mug, he does!
To Abe no Toshiro: Kon'nichiwa! Nani ga anata o shiro e to fumidashite genwaku sa semasu ka?
PusInBoots winks at Lord Perpireen.
Jolly good show, Lord Perpireen! Excellent timing, as always!
Turning to Johann, and skipping jauntily down the scaley coils of the unconscious dragon to clap his big friend on the haunches...
My drinking companion, Johann! In full bear form and fury, I see! I'm glad this dragon did not singe off all of your fur... That bare streak down your back looks, um... stylish! Si, very chic!
Looking around for Ogon Fox, he inquires: Where's our friend the Fox at? I do not see him here... But wait! Look there! Up, at the highest window there in the castle! Is that not Monsieur Fox!?
Underworld Imperial Dragon wrote: ROUND 3:
Recognizing the supreme threat presented by PusInBoots, the underworld dragon's eyes google in momentary fear!
What in Yomi is THIS!? A Prince of Cats!?
The underworld imperial dragon turns on PusInBoots with savage fury!
Bite 1d20+22 deals 2d6+12 damage!
Claw 1d20+22 deals 1d8+8 damage!
Claw 1d20+22 misses the nimble Cat!
Gore 1d20+21 deals 1d8+12 piercing damage!
Tail Slap 1d20+21 whacks Cat back for 1d8+12 bludgeoning damage!
MMEEEOOOOOUUCHH!!
No wonder I felt it when this dragon attacked Bear! SACRED HEART OF JESUS, this thing is nasty!
Lord Perpireen McGibel wrote: "Salut! Cat en bottes. Qu'est-ce qui amène tes petites pattes elle?
Said Lord P on spotting a mythic being.
Grinning a fangy grin at the little Lord, PusInBoots replies: Bonjour, Seigneur Perpireen! Je suis ici pour aider nos amis communs, Bear et Fox! Il semble que dès que je leur tourne le dos, ils ont des problèmes, ils ne peuvent pas s'échapper!
Wasting not a second for introductions, Pus In Boots is a cascading river of steel and fur washing over the Underworld Imperial Dragon, opening red rivers of blood from the scaley hide of the door guardian!
+5 keen wounding rapier Cat's Paw 1d20 + 30 ⇒ (18) + 30 = 48 confirm 1d20 + 30 ⇒ (12) + 30 = 42 crits, pierces for 2d6 + 22 ⇒ (3, 3) + 22 = 28 plus 2 bleed...
Cat's Paw 1d20 + 25 ⇒ (7) + 25 = 32 pierces for 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (2) + 11 = 13 plus 1 bleed...
Thrust! 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (20) + 20 = 40 confirm 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (1) + 20 = 21 pierces for 1d6 + 11 ⇒ (4) + 11 = 15 plus 1 bleed...
Thrust! 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (9) + 15 = 24 bends against the steely scales!
...to Johann's side in Kyoto City, just in time for round 3!
Suddenly, a familiar character pops into existence next to Johann...
It is Signòr PusInBoots!
Bonjour mes amis!
The Cat eyes the image well, then slaps Rumplestilskin on his hunched back and meows! Favor well spent, thou rascal! Be good, now, for if I hear of any more evil from thee, I'll make of thine eyeballs buttons to secure my boots, I Will! And I'll drink nectar from thy wicked little skull, like a pretty little teacup, I will!
Bumping his head on the low ceiling of Rumplestilskin's Stump-house as he stands, the Cat reads another of Merlin's greater teleport scrolls, whisking him away...
It is Johann and Mister Fox, Rump! They are in mortal peril, I felt it in my whiskers, I did! You must scry their location for me, you old charlatan! Show me where they are, so I can rescue them from certain doom!
Plopping a pouch of golden dinars far exceeding his bill on the bar, the Catfolk swashbuckler dashes out of the tavern, clambers up to the rooftops, and springs toward the bell tower of Saint Peter's Church, in which he has stashed a caché of magic items that includes several specially scribed greater teleport scrolls he lifted from that old Welsh cambion coot Merlin...
No one can beguile magic items like Signór Pus In Boots...
He finagles a casting as if he were a powerful wizard like the Merlin who penned this scroll, and BAM!! He is in Rumplestilskin's Stump-house in the Black Forest!
RUMPLESTILSKIN!! I'M CALLING IN THAT FAVOR, YOU S&~&TY LITTLE TRICKSTER!! TELL ME WHERE BEAR AND FOX ARE, RIGHT NOW, OR YOUR CREEPY LITTLE FACE WILL BECOME THE FLAP OF MY NEW HANDY HAVERSACK! DO YOU HEAR ME, RUMPLESTILSKIN!?
At that very moment, in the Eternal City of Rome:
Pus in Boots is yanked out of his carousing with wenches at his favorite Roman tavern on the riverside by a sudden psychic intuition that his old pals, Fox and Bear, are in dire trouble!
L'ours et le renard sont en danger de mort! Ce n'est pas le moment pour le vin et les poitrines! Le chat doit rejoindre ses amis et les sauver d'une mort certaine!
The irascible catfolk swashbuckler, Signor Pusinboots, plays a chaotic game of cat and mouse with the Five Deadly Venoms of China--Sifu Centipede, Sifu Scorpion, Sifu Spider, Sifu Viper, and Sifu Toad--which are hunting the wily vigilante Ogon Fox for the bounty on his head.
Having briefly caroused with "Bear and Fox" of the Crusaders of the Catacombs in the taverns of Rome, the feline swashbuckler now has an affinity for those stalwart shapeshifters, and keeps the Asian assassins off of Fox's back by keeping them on their toes...
That Johann was a right good chum of the Fox, he was... He'll keep Foxy kicking 'til our next round of victuals...
Johann Kaltgeboren wrote: "BWA HA HA! YOU ARE TOO MUCH FUN, MR. SIR CAT. HOW WOULD YOU FEEL ABOUT JOINING MY BAND OF COURAGEOUS HEROES! WE COULD USE A FELINE OF YOUR AGILE TALENTS!" Well, you flatter me, sir! Your proposal is a tempting offer, I must admit... Mayhaps after I’ve concluded some pressing pirate business I’ve promised to attend to in Neverland, I will take you up on your offer!
Pusinboots picks a bit of catnip out of his nostril with a claw and laps up some cream from a dish. More honeyed mead for my friend here, and I’ll have some fish if you have any! cries the catfolk swashbuckler to the serving wench...
Signor Pusinboots huffs the pouch of catnip deeply, slit pupils dilating with euphoria as he regaled Johann with the tale of how he, Shrek the Ogre, and Donkey were chased by a mob of xenophobic peasants into the sanctuary of the Beast’s Castle...
No, no... By the time we’d arrived, the hag’s curse had finished it’s cruel work. We weren’t transformed into anything else, somewhat to our relief, and perhaps a bit of disappointment...
He recounts how the Beast and his Lady Belle treated them hospitably, protecting them from the mob, and how they in turn rid the woods surrounding the castle of a clan of evil werewolves who had framed the baron for several of their murders...
Johann Kaltgeboren wrote: *** The next morning***
Being still at his favorite watering hole, Johann switches from mulled honey to honeycomb for breakfast. "COME FRIEND PUSINBOOTS, REGALE US ALL OF ANOTHER TALE OF YOUR TRAVELS WITH THE OGRE AND THE TALKING DONKEY. TRULY, THAT IS STORY THAT DESERVES TO BE HEARD AGAIN AND AGAIN! WENCH! BRING MY FRIEND HERE SOME CATNIP TO KEEP HIS HEAD UP!"
Ah, yes, Signor Shrek and the Donkey! Such adventures we had! Did I already tell of the Castle of the Beauty and the Beast, which we visited once while we were in Avignon? A powerful curse had been laid upon the Baron Du Bois and his Castle by an old hag whom he’d refused to shelter during a winter storm, and the baron was afflicted with a unique form of lycanthropy which causes him to be ever in the shape of a wolfman! Even stranger, his servants were transformed into animated household items! Monsieur Lumiere was polymorphed into a talking candlestick! Monsieur Cogsworth into a talking clock, and Madam Potts was made into a talking teakettle!...
Johann Kaltgeboren wrote: ***The night before***
Johann is tickled to meet another talking animal. Folk like Signor Pusinboots remind him of home.
"MR. CAT... <ahem>..., it's been a long day and I'm tuckered out. But are you interested in a breakfast buffet at a great bar that I know? They serve me mulled honey and I'm sure they will have hot milk. And the entertainment is conducted by three blind mice!"
Sounds delightful, Mister Bear! Lead the way, sir!
Pusinboots follows Johann to the aforementioned watering hole and carouses the night away with him. The Three Blind Mice are at first nervous by the Cat’s interest in their performance, but eventually relax when they realize he is genuinely entertained by their shenanigans and not bent on eating them...
Quinlan Ifrean wrote: Quinlan settles to the ground behind puss and scorpion. He gestures lazily at the monk. "This one very nearly escaped to the astral plane, that would have been a real pain. Seems everything is well in hand now. Perhaps someone would be so kind as to restrain my friend here though." @Sifu Scorpion:
Would you have, Master Scorpion? Do you know that old trick of the bag of holding?
@Johann:
*Purrrr!* You honor me, Mister Bear, indeed, you do! Your strength must surely rival that of Hercules himself, I dare say!
Returning with Quinlan and Scorpion to where the others wait in the street, the legendary folk hero Pusinboots introduces himself with a courtly bow to each of the Crusaders and Sifu Centipede...
In English: Salutations, Crusaders of the Catacombs, and good Master Centipede! We have apprehended this Scorpion, who sought to do you harm, Mister Fox! I am Signor Pusinboots, at your service! It is a pleasure to meet fellow fighters of wrongs and bucklers of swashes! *Meow!*
Double-taking at Johann, he adds: I say! Weren’t you twice as big and twice as Bear-like a moment ago!? He winks and grins a feline grin at the shifter...
As he springs from rooftop to rooftop back toward the Crusaders, he becomes aware that his bag of holding has ruptured, obviously cut from within by the rascal Sifu Scorpion!
In Sylvan: Pixie Sticks! He’s ruptured the bag! I hope he’s lost on the Astral Plane for the rest of his days!
Pusinboots returns to the Crusaders with a look of sheepish chagrin on his feline face...
In Sylvan: Fiddle dee die, and fiddle dee day! The bloody Scorpion got away!
Do as I command, and you have my word of honor as a gentlecat, you will not die by my claw...or blade...
Pulling a bag from his backpack, he opens it to reveL a darkness within, a magical portal to an extra dimensional space within the bag of holding...
Please, Master Scorpion, if you’d be so kind as to climb inside this magical bag so I may be assured of your cooperation as we return to the Crusaders?
He holds the open end of the bag wide toward Scorpion...
Pus’n’Boots lands with superhuman agility upon the railing of the balcony behind Scorpion, and rests the glittering, razor-keen blade of his magic rapier Cat’s Claw against Scorpion’s neck... Melee touch 1d20 + 23 ⇒ (5) + 23 = 28 succeeds!
In Cantonese: Don’t make me kill you, Master Scorpion... Who would pass on the Scorpion style kung fu to future generations if I kill you?
Seeing Scorpion leap up onto the pottery shop rooftop, Pusinboots grins mischievously...
In Sylvan: Fleedle dee doo and fleedle dee die! Up goes the Scorpion, into the sky!
Giving chase with twinkling rapier and dirk, the legendary Cat springs onto the pottery shop rooftop after Scorpion...
Seeing that Sifu Centipede is attacking Sifu Scorpion, Pusinboots cocks his little head (which dons a jaunty wide-brim hat with goose feather plume) and squints quizzically at the battling kung fu masters...
In Sylvan: The Venomous Vermin squabble over prey? Dueling for the right to bag the Fox, I presume?
Sense Motive 1d20 + 20 ⇒ (5) + 20 = 25 is good enough to realize Centipede is protecting the Fox, not fighting over the right to his head...
The gnome-sized catfolk swashbuckler chuckles to himself...
Using round 5 to attempt what was just hand waived...
Acrobatics to leap gracefully from rooftop to the invisible ninja grappled by the dire bear 1d20 + 50 ⇒ (3) + 50 = 53 is good enough...
Disarm vs ninja's CMD (he can see her thanks to a permanent see invisibility affecting him) 1d20 + 30 ⇒ (3) + 30 = 33 does the trick!
Actually, only one of the kunoichi's wakizashi is disarmed...
Initiative for round 5 is 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (10) + 11 = 21
Zagathoth wrote: [dice=initiative]1d20+2
so, is Pus like a talking cat that walks upright, or like a catfolk, or what?
Small Pygmy catfolk swashbuckler
See diddly dee la fa la ta dee! The Bear and the Fox and the Bugs and me! Over the roof where they burn pottery! Tweet da la tweet da la deedle dee dee!
Pus’N’Boots springs like a jack-in-the-box out at the kunoichi, disarming her double wakizashi with a riposte that crosses her blades...
*TWANK!!* *KLANG!!*
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