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"I like your way with data," Research Rat says in admiration.
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"But.... I don't wanna go into the death dungeon!" wails Research Rat. "Sometimes, I really hate my hireling contract." Standing in Chance's shadow, Research Rat glances over at the crane that Zarzucket pointed to. "Yeah, that could be interesting!"
"Are you, um, glitching or something?" Research Rat asks, fascinated.
"Research Rat, coming through." Research Rat spits out his tool kit and goes to work.
Research Rat just shakes his head. "She comes from a whole planet of naked people? Figures."
"GAH!" Research Rat grabs his bags and backs away from the creature. "This is why we hirelings need hazard pay! Keep that hexoglin pup outta my stuff!"
"At least you introduced me. That's better than my last job," Research Rat grumbles as he hauls his boxes around. "I'm Research Rat. Not that any of you are going to remember that I'm around unless you need a trap disabled or a door hacked." Research Rat sighs. "I tell you, hirelings get no respect in the Society. They really should start offering hazard pay!"
Research Rat attempts to aid the computers and engineering checks. "Hold on, hold on... I gots scripts and tools and all sorts of stuff!"
The Golden Fortune case reported in Goka is one that's caught my eye for some time, though I confess not for the most unbiased of reasons—it's been far too long since I visited my father's hometown, and I'm sure my uncles would appreciate a visit. Nevertheless, our archivists detected signs of a strange anomaly around one of its many restaurant boats: a stuttering phenomena that swallows people and spits them out later, stumbling and disoriented. I leave it to you, my dear future archivists, to unravel the cause and resolve this issue. — K.H.W.
Research Rat looks over the script Trill shows him. "And here we are, in lovely Jatembe park, home of the biggest forest reserve in Absalom Station..." The ysoki's tail twitches. "What, people actually pay you for this? I could be looking at pretty trees and flowers all day instead of providing tech support to clueless Starfinders? I'm the wrong business."
Researh Rat turns to the halfling. "Psst.... Norbert. You got any scripts to aid him with? This looks like it might be more job than one awesome rat and one really weird android can do, if you know what I mean."
"Need another script, bud? I got scripts for days."
Research Rat's whiskers twitch, and he says to RZMR, "Here, bud, I got a script for that!"
Research Rat slaps a palm to his forehead. "Do you see what I've got to work with here?"
Research Rat has no idea what the knife is, but the gloves are magnegloves. "Ooh, Magnegloves!" Research Rat enthuses. "They've got electromagnets in 'em!"
"Hang on, hang on!" Research Rat spits out a left-handed sonic screwdriver out of his cheekpouch, and hands it to RZMR. "That should be exactly what you need for that door!"
"Hey, do you want to borrow my lucky pliers?" Research Rat spits out a set of pliers from his cheek pouch and hands it to Mizzrym.
"Hold on, hold on... Research Rat coming through. There's doors to open!" Research Rat holds out pliers to whomever is actually disabling the door.
Research Rat looks up groggily. "Mmblml... Need coffee."
Ustalav has been the source of a disproportionate number of our open cases. Large enough for strange phenomena to be noticed, small enough for them to remain unsolved, at the fringes. Lorres Manor, in Ravengro, is a nexus of such events—accidents befalling the workers who built it, objects moving, possibly some kind of haunting (or curse)? whatever the case, the mansion's relative obscurity is likely the only thing keeping the events contained. — K.H.W.
The book opens once more. And so another chapter closes. Xopatl has always struck me with a sense of wonder, its ancient, long-lost magic casually defying what we thought possible. The archivists who followed me not only solved the issue of the deviant abilities that arose periodically in Xopatl, they also closed the cycle on a legend. Fascinating to learn that the battle between Yllado and Nolimarthos had it seeds in history... Of course, the question arises, why did Yllado wait so long to destroy the jawbone of a demon, the jawbone that kept alive the dangerous Song of Making and Unmaking? I have but a theory. What if Yllado could not destroy the relic until it had slowly leached its power into generations of Arcadians? What if the slow rate of power breakthroughs was not the result of improper sealing, but an intentional slow leak to keep weakening the relic until it could be broken? Perhaps we will never know. -- K.H.W.
My future and fellow Archivists, The Dark Archive is no more, except for me. When the Pathfinder Society announced that our faction was to be dissolved, absorbed into its other departments, I grabbed the files I could and left before they could stop me. These pages are all that remain of our faction's records, and I am all that remains of our membership. These these subjects are what remain of my personal caseload. Some, I had been investigating for years, but I have reason to believe that the group itself, as a whole, is more important than the sum of its parts. The files have to be connected, in some way. I know it. Though it's been a while since I explained such paths of thought to other archivists, even at my best, I'm not sure I could describe it. I can feel the web that weaves between them, even if I know not how. As I prod at one thread, another tremors with the impact. Like with all mysteries, every piece unveiled reveals new questions at its edges. I know too well how overwhelming this tide can feel. All archivists know it. All I can tell you is that it passes, as all things do. Hold fast to your investigations, and to each other. This work shouldn't be done alone; I know this better than most. I've done as much as I can on my own, but an isolated perspective can reveal only so much. I miss the days of collaborative investigation, the nights of fruitless brainstorm, the theories shouted out of desperate whimsy that turned inexplicably true. This, to me, is the Dark Archive. We need no motto, logo, or funding, so long as we have archivists. If there are people, somewhere, anywhere, who believe that every question has an answer worth finding, then our faction persists. I may be the Lone Archivist, but I have no intention of being the last. To that end: may the darkness bring you enlightenment, as it always does. Until we meet, —K.H.W.
Research Rat grins. "With pleasure, boss. Here are Lita's own's words!"
Research Rat gives a thumbs up. "I'm filming everything, unless they ask us not to. he didn't ask."
"Working on Carpentry?" Research Rat suggests.
"These rhyme schemes are getting scarier!" Research Rat grins.
Research rat gives himself a dope slap, and then whispers to Ik, "...like a rabid terrier."
Research Rat discreetly coughs into a handknerchief. "Yeah, discretion is Djakar's by-word."
"Aww, look Djakar! Some bosses actually care about their staff enough to give them cupcakes!" Once his dig at his self-centered boss is done, Research Rat glances at the list. "Do you mind if I add myself to the list? I'll eat practically anything, but I go nuts for the ones filled with raspberries and chocolate cheesecake."
Research Rat looks down at the pen, and immediately disassembles it into its component parts, then photographs it. "It's not everyday you see such an antique." As Djakar gestures at the photos, he sighs and starts reassembling it. "The things I do for the network..."
Research Rat stares at the image of the Abysshead band member breaking an instrument over an ysoki camera man's head. "I'm gonna need better head gear, aren't I?"
"She better not go on any Dataphile missions..."
Research Rat swats Chance when the machine explodes. "That is what happens when you don't let the professionals handle the computers! See what a mess you caused?!"
"Here, let me see that!" Research Rat starts rewiring the cameras. "That should help."
Research Rat gives Hackrat a high-five. "Hey, wanna hangout while they're doing their boring combat stuff? Also, how good does your franchise pay? My pay sucks!"
Research Rat whispers to Naitier, "You know what I think a happy ending would be? A raise, that's what!"
Research Rat puts down the camera for a moment, tears in his eyes. "Your name is apt, Avid Dreamer. Those may be dreams, and aspirations! Or even memories of the you and your friend together."
"Yo! My name's Research Rat! My original designation was 'Bookbrain', but I ditched that for a name that I chose for myself. My species is Ysoki."
"Research Rat! It's a franchise!"
Research Rat sighs, puts down his game, and attempts to aid Lego. "Here, let me adjust that for you."
The bored ysoki is sitting on top of a pile of books, playing a game on his comm unit. Printed on the back of his uniform is the following advertisement. Need a hireling? Hire a Research Rat! Unfortunately, his uniform shows more enthusiasm for the work than he does. Attention still on the game, he asks, "Is it a Computers, Engineering or Physical Science question? If not, I don't care."
"Okay, okay... I think I got it here..." Research Rat hits a button, and connects the song to the ship's speakers so that it sounds great. ♫ Do you ever feel like you're out of charge
Do you ever feel like your laser's dead
Do you ever feel there's no signal here
Do you know that there's still a charge for you
You just gotta ignite the light
Baby, your battery's full
Don't have to scrounge for batteries to replace
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will glow
You just gotta ignite the light
"Hold it, let me replay the footage that I have here..." Research Rat's whiskers twitch as he replays the original distress signal. "Yep, this ship is the Avid Dreamer!" The ysoki pats one the inert turrets, and whispers, "Thanks for not killing us this time. I like my fur intact."
Research Rat, hiding behind Djakar as she moves in, tries to identify the creature.
Research Rat looks through the scrap for anything useful.
"C'mon, c'mon, there's got to be something useful for an enterprising hireling like myself...." He tugs on Djakar's sleeve. "Help me look! Those three eyes of yours have got to be useful for something!"
"Hey, I'm the sound guy!" Research Rat, assuming that combat is at least temporarily over, replays transmission. "Mind you, they said they were disabling incoming transmissions, but if it were me I'd still listen in. That's how you keep well informed!"
"Wow! This'll be great footage for our broadcast! I got the whole thing on camera!" Research Rat enthuses.
"Does anyone check to see if the Hireling's environmental protections are set? Nope, I tell you, we get no respect." Research Rat seals his environmental protections, and then makes sure to focus the DNN camera on the cabin door that's opening.
"Wai-i-it for me!" Research Rat flees down the hallway. "Those crabs think that I'm appetizer-sized!"
"Hold on, Jek, I'm coming!" Research Rat puts down his camera and rushes to help his shirren buddy. "You did me a solid showing me where I could warm my feet, so here... Let me help you calibrate that Crystal Ball!"
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