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Well?
Are you talking physician diagnosed depression or just a funk your in? If it's physician verified depression, then take your prescribed medication faithfully and have honest and regular feedback with your physician . Secondly you can take a multivitamin supplement everyday to cover any possible deficiencies which could be aggravating the condition. Thirdly good diet exercise, and plenty of outdoor activity will help. Also try to never forsake normal social activity with friends and family despite how much you would like to sequester yourself. And lastly continue to do the things you love whenever possible even with dulled interests, it'll keep you lively.
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Things that I do (or have done) to cheer up:
Listen to music that energizes and inspires.
Watch WIPEOUT with my family.
Do "Karaoke Night" at a local bar.
Play laser tag.
Play paintball.
Take my boys to an inflatable play-place, such as Monkey Joe's, that allows adults to jump, too.
Go on Facebook and see what random, funny stuff people have posted recently.
Watch a funny movie: Fifth Element, Princess Bride, Fierce Creatures, Big Trouble in Little China, Legend of Drunken Master, etc.
Come here to the Paizo boards and read the latest political flamewar with amusement, or contribute another Haiku in the Forum Games section.
Well?
First thing is it is vital to realize that depression is a read disease with a respectable body count. Do not take it lightly. It is treatable and almost always curable or at least ab le to be brought under control.
I suffered from it for most of my life, it is not fun.
Now I am nowhere near a doc but here is what I do.
1. see a doc. Many cities have free/sliding scale mental health folks. See one they are good people. I suggest starting with a public health/community person cause they have no agenda apart from helping and are excellent at triage. Consider what they tell you.
If you can't find one then see a gp they are FAR better than nothing and they will have contacts you can exploit.
2. if you can afford it/have insurance see a private doc. It may well take seeing more than one before you find a good fit. Keep at it. Don't be too afraid of meds but don't expect them to solve everything. Brains are complex and talk therapy works.
3. For short term relief I find listening to world radio on line a great distraction. Tuning into the BBC or DW or Radio Sweden reminds me there is a world out there and I really enjoy hearing strange/new things.
4. Connections. Talk to people. Live is better than mediated in this case but do what you can.
Basically treat it like a real illness, cause it is. Don't try to self treat, watch your drinking ect. Combined they can get nasty fast. See a doc.
Sorry if that came off as too harsh. I know the kind of life-sucking hell depression can lead folks into. There is a way out, constant slow effort is the key.
Good luck.
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Exercise, eat well, sleep regular hours, game with friends once a week, drink alcohol for taste only and avoid liquor.
Remember that social anxiety is common among self-aware people. You're smart enough to be concerned with what others think. Some aren't.
This stuff works for me. Unless you're hallucinating, I'd steer clear of meds and shrinks. If you benefit from having someone to talk to, find a therapist who understands that and stick with it. Freud is BS and only specific problems can be solved with chemicals, whether or not they are legal. Drugs ALWAYS come with drawbacks, so be very careful-- I think meds should be a last resort.
Find someone to talk to who doesn't sell drugs.
Lightbox. OMFG. Lightbox.
I was a sufferer of clinical depression from the time I was fairly young. Aside from the diagnosis, I did not receive anything but the barest of counciling (read: lectures from so-called councilors at school).
I suffered and fought with it for a long time, and then in my early twenties, I realized no help was coming and I had to deal with it myself. Basically, I refused to get involved in another relationship with a woman until I had worked out what was wrong with myself (you can't have healthy relationships if you are not healthy yourself).
I delved into various religions and philosophies, concentrated on my music, and started playing basketball every day. I spent a lot of time in self-reflection. I realized that, just as chemicals within us can influence moods, so can our moods and activities influence how our chemicals behave within us. I worked very hard to stop listening to my negative side and to let a lot of my unhappy past go.
I'm glad to say that all this hard work did help a lot. At the end of my self-imposed "dry spell" and voyage of self-discovery I was indeed a stronger person. I was in a short relationship that ended very well, and about a year later met and married the woman who is still my wife. We are very happy, as is our son, and I am very grateful I took that time, got a lot of exercise, and really became a much more honest person with myself.
Alas, the story does not end there. After nearly twelve years of working in a high anxiety and increasingly toxic workplace, I recently had a very bad panic attack, a near "nervous breakdown," brought upon by years of really bad managerial decisions and very little to no support from our managers. I just couldn't take it anymore.
I had to see my doctor, and he did put me on a mild anti-depressant. It's more of an "anxiety pill," and it's a very low dose, but I had to admit that this time, I really needed the help. Aside from this, he prescribed all the same things I already knew would work: Exercise, better diet, time off from work, and time to reflect about where my life is headed and how I can take more control of it.
Hopefully, I won't have to take these pills forever. But I am grateful for the help right now. In the old days, I would have worked hard to get through this myself, but with a wife and kid, I needed help much more quickly this time.
So, at the very least, be honest with yourself, try to admit to the things that are beyond your control, try to engage in the things that make you happy. Get exercise, cut out the soda, eat better. Go easy with your relationships while you work your issues out, and don't make any serious decisions when you are in such a state. Be happy for the small things. And if hard self-introspection is not helping you, and things seem to be getting harder, really, go see a doctor.
Exercise, eat well, sleep regular hours, game with friends once a week, drink alcohol for taste only and avoid liquor.
Remember that social anxiety is common among self-aware people. You're smart enough to be concerned with what others think. Some aren't.
This stuff works for me. Unless you're hallucinating, I'd steer clear of meds and shrinks. If you benefit from having someone to talk to, find a therapist who understands that and stick with it. Freud is BS and only specific problems can be solved with chemicals, whether or not they are legal. Drugs ALWAYS come with drawbacks, so be very careful-- I think meds should be a last resort.
Find someone to talk to who doesn't sell drugs.
Can't agree with this. Psychiatry has come a LONG way since Freud and some meds may be needed but a gaming forum is not the place to discuss this.
See a doc to get an outside view. Consider what they say about meds do some research with reliable sources and make up your own mind.
PS to blow my own would-be-professions horn your local library or major world libraries accessible via the web are excellent places to find good sources. Ask a librarian, we are trained not to have agendas and to get you the highest quality information available.
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Well?
Mostly suck it up and get together with friends.
I don't think what works for one person can really translate to another. The ways I cope with depression probably wouldn't work for many other people. After five deployments, and all the stresses that come with a military career, I'm lucky to have not taken my own life.
Drink a fifth of Bourbon, smoke a lot of weed and listen loudly to all the great most depressing bands from the 80s until the depression passes.
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What I do to combat depression (there are different definitions and stuff, but this is for what I term depression):
Whenever I start dwelling on stuff I f@~%ed up, I tell myself to shut the f++! up and forcibly divert my attention. It works surprisingly well, but as I've got the usual optimism at the start of a school year, it could just be motivation to take the trouble to not dwell. (This is more anxiety than depression.)
I find music really helps. Some of my worst bouts of depression coincided with pretty much no music.
In the past when I'm feeling depressed I've avoided contact with people. This has always screwed me over (and will in the future, according to my pessimistic side, which is usually right, according to it).
Medications can make a difference.
I'm not entirely sure whether Something Positive (the comic) would combat depression or foster it. But it definitely puts some s~@+ in perspective.
<lots of snipping>
Actually, I'm not sure if I'll ever get depressed as long as I have access to MSPA. Estranged from society, perhaps, but never depressed.
Drink a fifth of Bourbon, smoke a lot of weed and listen loudly to all the great most depressing bands from the 80s until the depression passes.
Yup, that's what I do. Exercise, too.
The Smiths's The Queen Is Dead usually clears everything up for me.
Also, DON'T SEEK MEDICAL ADVICE ON THE INTERNET. Especially not in the Off-Topic Discussion forum of a Role-playing game website.
Seek counseling. If you are a college student it is likely to be free at your local college and they cannot prescribe meds for you.
Music is a powerful mood adjuster. If you listen to a lot of bummed out music, try switching up genres for something more upbeat. I naturally favor sad music, but it really can create a negative cycle.
No one is asking for medical advice here.
In that case, yup, weed and The Smiths will do it.
(My fullest apologies for such a long post. I didn't realize it would become so large).
In 2005 I began to suffer from sudden "attacks" of depression that would settle on me like a suffocating blanket made of lead. It was physically painful to endure, but would eventually pass. But they kept increasing in intensity and duration, but I'd been through a truly catastrophic emotional and mental breakdown 20 years prior so I thought I could muster up and get through it.
In 2006 I left a job I loved for one that, at the time, I thought had better benefits such as being much closer to home and a discounted/free college education for me and my son. But the pressure of working under multiple bosses who seemed at cross purposes with each other began to wear me down. It reached a point where I would just sit at my desk staring at my monitor or just stop working altogether and look for distractions to take my mind off the pressure. But soon I began to feel like my head was going to physically explode and my body was in constant pain. I began to have urges such as a desire to run from my desk and throw myself down a flight of stairs or smash my head into walls hoping to alleviate the pain.
This eventually led to my being fired. Without a job I had to fall back on my savings to survive. I did begin seeing a counselor with whom I began a long series of medication and subsequent adjustments to the meds hoping to find something that would help me. The first attempt was disastrous, as I have virtually no memory of the summer of 2007 because of the fog I was in.
Then the panic attacks came. I couldn't leave my house or even have friends around without hyperventilating and even breaking down in tears. I shut down all my gaming activities (I know you're supposed to try and continue things you enjoy, but I just couldn't handle the pressure of having people around me anymore).
A full year passed and eventually my savings were wiped out. With no job I lost my house and had to move back in with my wife (we'd been separated for several years, but still close). This was supposed to be just a temporary arrangement until my disability was approved and I could get my own place again. Well, that was almost 4 years ago now and my monthly disability award is so small that I doubt I can ever afford my own place again, even with housing assistance.
Today I still suffer deeply from the depression and the anxiety, but I finally have a set of meds I take daily that have helped me cope with them. I started gaming again about a year and a half ago, and we try to get together every couple or three weeks, and that has helped. But I still can't handle crowds or noise (makes it hard because my son is in the college marching band). I've come to accept that I may never fully recover, but with help from family, friends, and professionals I can get by.
There has been some good advice posted here, such as seeking professional help and trying to keep your support group close, as well as changing habits to become more active, eat better, etc. But above all you have to decide for yourself how you want to handle the disease, which is what depression is. It can be battled and even conquered, so don't let the bastard win.
"...so don't let the bastard win."
+all
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Disclaimer: I have not been diagnosed with depression. I have been diagnosed with migraines. This is relevant because both conditions are thought to have the same root cause: low serotonin. Below are the techniques I use to keep my serotonin high enough to prevent the migraines. What works for me might not work for you. Also, I'm assuming you're over 18 so don't whine at me for basing my recommendations on science.
- Food. But not the normal 'excuse to eat anything' you'd assume. I have found that omega-3s are a good preventative. Half a jar of olives (beware of the salt), tuna sandwich, chips and guacamole, veggies sauteed in olive oil, etc. Two days of dosing with omega-3s will make me feel better for a week and it's not exactly bad for you. Avoid fish oil pills, there's nowhere near enough fish oil in them to do anything but give you bad breath.
- Music. Something with a beat to distract you from yourself. I recommend instrumental or foreign language so lyrics don't distract you from whatever else you're doing.
- Pets. Medicine recognizes the benefits of a furry animal in your lap and so do I.
- People. They make you get out and do things regardless of the stink you make about it. They can also fetch me my painkiller of choice, caffeine.
- Wank. It raises your serotonin. You know, that neurotransmitter that depression meds (SSRIs) are meant to raise. And it's free. If your serotonin is too low (such as when you're depressed or when I'm about to get hit in the head with an ice pick) you actually cannot successfully wank, making it a fairly good test in my experience.
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- Wank. It raises your serotonin. You know, that neurotransmitter that depression meds (SSRIs) are meant to raise. And it's free. If your serotonin is too low (such as when you're depressed or when I'm about to get hit in the head with an ice pick) you actually cannot successfully wank, making it a fairly good test in my experience.
I can't believe I forgot orgasms!
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get a large bulldozer and fill in that depression with large amounts of dirt.
I play computer chess for hours.
All the while thinking up Call of Cthulhu one-shot adventures.
Then I sleep.
I get up and go buy some Mt. Dew, and drink a lot of it.
Then goto the gym and work out, afterwards sit in the sauna.
Then, I go to my FLGS and try to get a game going.
"When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: 'If you live
each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be
right.' It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33
years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: 'If
today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about
to do today?'"
"And whenever the answer has been no for too many days in a row, I know
I need to change something."
"Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid
the trap of thinking you have something to lose."
"No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want
to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No
one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because death is
very likely the single best invention of life."
"It is life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the
new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you
will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so
dramatic, but it is quite true."
"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.
Don’t be trapped by dogma -- which is living with the results of other
people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out
your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow
your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want
to become. Everything else is secondary."
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Thanks for all the tips everyone. I legitimately have depression, as diagnosed by a military therapist. I was in a really bad funk when I posted the question, and have since got back up and dusted myself off. I tend to fall occasionally, metaphorically speaking. My personal beliefs make suicide a near impossibility, despite how dark and horrible my thoughts get at times, so do not fret. I do realize that is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
I spent the day with my brother, cleaning, rearranging, watching movies, and helped making his new character for my Pathfinder game on Saturday. Had fun, and I do feel mostly better.
I can't express how much I despise depression. I find that most people around me that don't have it, don't understand just how debilitating it really can be. With that, and crazy work hours, I've not been able to finish several projects that I've started.
I hope to rectify that.
And again.. thank you, everyone.
If you do not like this world, then just live in another one.
Thanks for all the tips everyone. I legitimately have depression, as diagnosed by a military therapist. I was in a really bad funk when I posted the question, and have since got back up and dusted myself off. I tend to fall occasionally, metaphorically speaking. My personal beliefs make suicide a near impossibility, despite how dark and horrible my thoughts get at times, so do not fret. I do realize that is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
I spent the day with my brother, cleaning, rearranging, watching movies, and helped making his new character for my Pathfinder game on Saturday. Had fun, and I do feel mostly better.
I can't express how much I despise depression. I find that most people around me that don't have it, don't understand just how debilitating it really can be. With that, and crazy work hours, I've not been able to finish several projects that I've started.
I hope to rectify that.
And again.. thank you, everyone.
Best of luck to you. As a former service member if your still active please make the most use of the medical benefits you have. If your not active still talk to the VA.
I lost a very good friend and former roommate to depression he felt unloved because a girl he liked didn't like him, abandoned because I left for boot camp, unattractive because of his height/weight ratio and so at 24 he ended his life. You at least recognize that suicide is never the right option so that makes you ahead of the game on that point.
The one thing that helped me get past any suicidal thoughts when I was younger was imagining the people I loved the most staring at my casket wondering why and feeling like it was their fault. No matter how tough it gets don't do that to people you love.
Best of luck to you.
to summarize what others have said: stay active! it takes your mind off what's upsetting you, keeps you from moping, and gets things done.
I certainly didn't intend to berate anyone. Apologies.
** spoiler omitted **
as an army vet, let me weigh in on this...
You said you were discharged from the military? what does your dd-214 specifically say for type of discharge? medical discharge? general discharge with honors? how long were you in before being discharged?
You dont have to post anything here, but what i am trying to get at is you can get help through the VA, and as long as it is documented on your DD-214 showing a type of discharge aside from dishonorable discharge, you are eligible for the health care, either free or a small co-pay (if you did a combat tour to iraq or afghan its free for 5 years). here is a number that has helped me 1-877-WAR-VETS ( 1-877-927-8387) its free, they are easy to talk to, and can direct you to a vet center, where it is free for a vet to walk in and get counciling.
** spoiler omitted **
i would say, in your situation, go to you local state VA office, and talk to the rep there. He/She will be able to give you definitive answers as to what you are eligible for, if your condition is service connected, and also help you in ways you didnt think of. Not sure what state you are in, but id start with going to Va.gov and finding your local state VA rep.
Are you a college student? Most colleges, state funded or otherwise, usually have some sort of free/discounted counseling services available to students. The college I went to would allow for 10 sessions free as this would help both the students who needed counseling and the students who were working towards a doctorate degree in Psychology.
@ Jason.
I was in the same minimum-or-less-wage boat when I started to get treatment. Check your state, city and county government for resources. I first saw a public health therapist and a public health GP. They got me to semi-functional, which got me more work hours and a very slightly better job. Yes it is embarassing to use public health but the people there really care and can really help. You can stand some embarassment. I expect the VA folks can hook you up with public health if for some reason they can't help you directly. Also your local library probably has a list of free/low-cost docs that they will be more than happy to provide to you on an anonamous basis.
Heck If you want I could look that stuff up for you.
@ Jason.
I was in the same minimum-or-less-wage boat when I started to get treatment. Check your state, city and county government for resources. I first saw a public health therapist and a public health GP. They got me to semi-functional, which got me more work hours and a very slightly better job. Yes it is embarrassing to use public health but the people there really care and can really help. You can stand some embarrassment. I expect the VA folks can hook you up with public health if for some reason they can't help you directly. Also your local library probably has a list of free/low-cost docs that they will be more than happy to provide to you on an anonymous basis.
Heck If you want I could look that stuff up for you.
As someone who's used public services to not starve I second this. Public services are there for a reason and that reason is to help people in situations like yours where options are slim and money is tight.