Master of *WHAT*?!


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AKA What's the strangest nickname you've ever been given, folks?

So a client of mine new to the country has been working on his English and it's coming along nicely. He adopted two cats and they're so timid that they hide from everyone and even he can't get too close to them. I walk into his home and not two minutes later the cats are a foot away, gazing up at me.

He says, "No one gets near them! You are a master of p*ssy!"

As vainly gratified as I'd be if that was the title of my biography, I explained to him that cat master would draw less stares. I was instantly reminded of Arthur, a sunny little Austrian boy with a speech issue who used to call across the field in first grade, "Hey Yone! Yone! Wanna play baseball, Yone?!" Inwardly I cringed a little because everyone laughed, but I never wanted him to feel bad about it so I always just responded to the name.

So you may now call me Yone or Master of P*ssy.

"Master of p*ssy I'm petting your fur!
Scratching your ears until I hear purrs!
Feeding you chicken and salmon that's pink!
Doing your catbox so it does not stink!
MASTER! (Meow!)
MASTER! (Hiss!)
Doing your catbox so it does not stink!"

Anything like this ever happen to you guys?

Liberty's Edge

Ha!

Well, there are worse nicknames to have


Mothman wrote:

Ha!

Well, there are worse nicknames to have

Yeah, I try to forget most of my nicknames.

-Ashavan

Liberty's Edge

Nothing that good.

Sovereign Court Contributor

Nice!

Yone. Master of P*ssy.

Awesome.

Liberty's Edge

I’ve had a few nicknames over the years, but nothing too odd. My name’s Luke (and I’m blond and a sci-fi fan) so I tend to get “Skywalker” a lot. For a while in high school I was called “Elrod”. And a few years back a friend starting calling me “Mothman” (both because we watched Mothman Prophecies together, and because I owned a t-shirt with a big graphic of a moth on it – and she hated moths).

Paizo Employee Director of Narrative

Nicknames don't seem to stick with me.

My whole life has been like one big P.E. class, because apparently people like to call me by my last name, as if Adam is a super common name like Mike or John or Chris.

However, my freshman year in highschool this stoner kid and his buddy gave me the nickname Crowman, on account of my largish nose. Maybe it was a Cyrano thing, or maybe that I dig crows and grackles and other roguish birds, but I never took it as the insult I believe was intended. Needless to say, it didn't last very long when they realized that it didn't get a rise out of me.

Still, Daigle, which doesn't even count, is the only thing I've been commonly called aside from my first name.

Liberty's Edge

Hey, Shaggy.....Scooby Doofus! Good one!


I get stupid ones. But once, one of my teachers referred to one of my paintings as a "Post-Apocalyptic Cezanne". So that's sort of a nickname, even if no one wanted to pick it up.

Liberty's Edge

James Keegan wrote:
I get stupid ones. But once, one of my teachers referred to one of my paintings as a "Post-Apocalyptic Cezanne". So that's sort of a nickname, even if no one wanted to pick it up.

Yertle.

Liberty's Edge

Adam Daigle wrote:

Nicknames don't seem to stick with me.

My whole life has been like one big P.E. class, because apparently people like to call me by my last name, as if Adam is a super common name like Mike or John or Chris.

However, my freshman year in highschool this stoner kid and his buddy gave me the nickname Crowman, on account of my largish nose. Maybe it was a Cyrano thing, or maybe that I dig crows and grackles and other roguish birds, but I never took it as the insult I believe was intended. Needless to say, it didn't last very long when they realized that it didn't get a rise out of me.

Still, Daigle, which doesn't even count, is the only thing I've been commonly called aside from my first name.

Buggsy.

Liberty's Edge

Mothman wrote:
I’ve had a few nicknames over the years, but nothing too odd. My name’s Luke (and I’m blond and a sci-fi fan) so I tend to get “Skywalker” a lot. For a while in high school I was called “Elrod”. And a few years back a friend starting calling me “Mothman” (both because we watched Mothman Prophecies together, and because I owned a t-shirt with a big graphic of a moth on it – and she hated moths).

Papillon.

Liberty's Edge

The Jade wrote:

AKA What's the strangest nickname you've ever been given, folks?

So a client of mine new to the country has been working on his English and it's coming along nicely. He adopted two cats and they're so timid that they hide from everyone and even he can't get too close to them. I walk into his home and not two minutes later the cats are a foot away, gazing up at me.

He says, "No one gets near them! You are a master of p*ssy!"

As vainly gratified as I'd be if that was the title of my biography, I explained to him that cat master would draw less stares. I was instantly reminded of Arthur, a sunny little Austrian boy with a speech issue who used to call across the field in first grade, "Hey Yone! Yone! Wanna play baseball, Yone?!" Inwardly I cringed a little because everyone laughed, but I never wanted him to feel bad about it so I always just responded to the name.

So you may now call me Yone or Master of P*ssy.

"Master of p*ssy I'm petting your fur!
Scratching your ears until I hear purrs!
Feeding you chicken and salmon that's pink!
Doing your catbox so it does not stink!
MASTER! (Meow!)
MASTER! (Hiss!)
Doing your catbox so it does not stink!"

Anything like this ever happen to you guys?

El Guapo

Liberty's Edge

Louis Agresta wrote:

Nice!

Yone. Master of P*ssy.

Awesome.

Lou Garou.


Heathansson wrote:
El Guapo

LOL Reminds me of an SNL skit where a comedian pretended to be Antonio Banderas hosting his own show.

His supporting cast would placate his enormous ego with: "You are de sexy!"


I tend to get called "bub" more often then not, blame it on a large family and everyone calling ya that

Also I was called axe man in high school, and most recent I was dubbed captain brake it for years at work along with Mr clean

Liberty's Edge

I have appropriated two nicknames, the first I ever really got, in the past few days. One guy keeps calling me "Moleman," but I have no idea why. Another guy has called me "Scout Boy" ever since he saw my Eagle Scout tattoo.

Sovereign Court Contributor

Heathansson wrote:
Louis Agresta wrote:

Nice!

Yone. Master of P*ssy.

Awesome.

Lou Garou.

Coolest nickname I ever got. Right there. Above these sentences. Thanks Heathansson!

Second favorite nickname: Animal (from growling and barking at people while playing sports - don't ask).

Dumbest nicknames: Agresta the Molester, Agression

Common nicknames: Big Lou, Luigi


I usually get faggot, butt pirate or ccksucker right before they start trying to beat the s%#t out of me.


The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:
I have appropriated two nicknames, the first I ever really got, in the past few days. One guy keeps calling me "Moleman," but I have no idea why. Another guy has called me "Scout Boy" ever since he saw my Eagle Scout tattoo.

Moleman


Xabulba wrote:
I usually get f%&got, butt pirate or ccksucker right before they start trying to beat the s%#t out of me.

Sorry, man. <:\

The Exchange

I've had many over the years, Darkwolf is actually my old Paintball nickname and some of my older friends still call me Wolf.

Never have I had such an awesome moniker as Master of P*ssy, though. I am jealous.


Darkwolf wrote:

I've had many over the years, Darkwolf is actually my old Paintball nickname and some of my older friends still call me Wolf.

Never have I had such an awesome moniker as Master of P*ssy, though. I am jealous.

<G> Well MoP may be the end all for nicks, but Darkwolf is very cool. Much better than my friend Jacob's. Jacob was hanging out with his teenage friends and one of them said, "Let's all give each other nickanmes." While everyone else got decent nicks, regrettably Jacob's nick became 'Heinous' and the name 'Jay Heinous' or 'Heinous' has stuck with him since. The best man at Jay's wedding a couple weeks ago even told the story during his speech.

Never let someone hang an unflattering nickname on you. They can be indelible. I met someone named Eggy once. Either the guy had a thing for sunny side up or a gas problem, but I didn't ask.

Paizo Employee Director of Sales

I have never had a nickname.

Thanks,
Cosmo


Cosmo wrote:
I have never had a nickname.

How about '20 bucks'? :P

Liberty's Edge

Cosmo wrote:

I have never had a nickname.

Thanks,
Cosmo

This dude called me Kramer in the Army, so I can bequeath it to you.

You just gotta walk through doors and act like you're having problems with it.

Liberty's Edge

Xabulba wrote:
I usually get f*!got, butt pirate or ccksucker right before they start trying to beat the s%#t out of me.

I'll hook you up proper; I'm making it a mission of mine, I take quite seriously.

I just gotta observate you some more's.

Liberty's Edge

The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:
I have appropriated two nicknames, the first I ever really got, in the past few days. One guy keeps calling me "Moleman," but I have no idea why. Another guy has called me "Scout Boy" ever since he saw my Eagle Scout tattoo.

Captain Rollins Jr.


While I never got a nickname that stuck, reading this story...

Mothman wrote:
My name’s Luke (and I’m blond and a sci-fi fan) so I tend to get “Skywalker” a lot.

...brought back all those times in school the kids would sing "Na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na na-na Bit-man!"

(Even though I can't sing it on this medium, I think you can guess the meaning.)

Liberty's Edge

Heathansson wrote:
Mothman wrote:
I’ve had a few nicknames over the years, but nothing too odd. My name’s Luke (and I’m blond and a sci-fi fan) so I tend to get “Skywalker” a lot. For a while in high school I was called “Elrod”. And a few years back a friend starting calling me “Mothman” (both because we watched Mothman Prophecies together, and because I owned a t-shirt with a big graphic of a moth on it – and she hated moths).
Papillon.

I shake my baguette at you!


Heathansson wrote:
James Keegan wrote:
I get stupid ones. But once, one of my teachers referred to one of my paintings as a "Post-Apocalyptic Cezanne". So that's sort of a nickname, even if no one wanted to pick it up.
Yertle.

One compromising photo with a tortoise and here we are....

Sovereign Court RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8

Well Livewire, obiviously, but that was self adopted.

Chuck Morris (my middle name's Charles. And people wonder why I never used it.)

Shreck, from a friend of mine who I call my favourite halfling.

most of my coworkers give me names that aren't printable. Though my boss calls me 'brat'

The Bear, until I moved to Columbus and the nickname started attracting the wrong kind of romantic interest.

"Evil universe Matt" because of the Goatee.

Liberty's Edge

CourtFool wrote:
Cosmo wrote:
I have never had a nickname.
How about '20 bucks'? :P

Private Joker.

Liberty's Edge

Matthew Morris wrote:

Well Livewire, obiviously, but that was self adopted.

Chuck Morris (my middle name's Charles. And people wonder why I never used it.)

Shreck, from a friend of mine who I call my favourite halfling.

most of my coworkers give me names that aren't printable. Though my boss calls me 'brat'

The Bear, until I moved to Columbus and the nickname started attracting the wrong kind of romantic interest.

"Evil universe Matt" because of the Goatee.

Maurice.

RPG Superstar 2012

My last name (Welham) gave me terrific nicknames: Good Ham, Ham Sandwich, etc.

My parents nicknamed me "Turd Bird" at the age of 2 or so, because I liked to rhyme words and repeat them incessantly. Evidently, that was my favorite combination of words--probably because of the response it got.

Liberty's Edge

Heathansson wrote:
The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:
I have appropriated two nicknames, the first I ever really got, in the past few days. One guy keeps calling me "Moleman," but I have no idea why. Another guy has called me "Scout Boy" ever since he saw my Eagle Scout tattoo.
Captain Rollins Jr.

Heh heh heh...

Liberty's Edge

James Keegan wrote:
One compromising photo with a tortoise and here we are....

I think I know which photo you're talking about.

Liberty's Edge

The Jade wrote:
The Eldritch Mr. Shiny wrote:
I have appropriated two nicknames, the first I ever really got, in the past few days. One guy keeps calling me "Moleman," but I have no idea why. Another guy has called me "Scout Boy" ever since he saw my Eagle Scout tattoo.
Moleman

Aw, come on, I look nothing like that guy!


The Jade wrote:
Xabulba wrote:
I usually get f%&got, butt pirate or ccksucker right before they start trying to beat the s%#t out of me.
Sorry, man. <:\

I'm only 70/30, but rednecks don't care if you're dating a girl they just remember that you kissed a 'dude' and that makes you target .


Heathansson wrote:
El Guapo

"So, tell me Heathy, would you say I have a plethora of presents?"

Xabulba wrote:

I usually get f%&got, butt pirate or ccksucker right before they start trying to beat the s%#t out of me...

I'm only 70/30, but rednecks don't care if you're dating a girl they just remember that you kissed a 'dude' and that makes you target .

I was a pretty scrawny tomboy and it sounds like you got it worse than me growing up. I know it's worthless, but you have my sincerest sympathies (and I have a very nice shovel if you need help burying some bodies).


That never gets old.


Ambrosia Slaad wrote:
Heathansson wrote:
El Guapo

"So, tell me Heathy, would you say I have a plethora of presents?"

Xabulba wrote:

I usually get f%&got, butt pirate or ccksucker right before they start trying to beat the s%#t out of me...

I'm only 70/30, but rednecks don't care if you're dating a girl they just remember that you kissed a 'dude' and that makes you target .

I was a pretty scrawny tomboy and it sounds like you got it worse than me growing up. I know it's worthless, but you have my sincerest sympathies (and I have a very nice shovel if you need help burying some bodies).

I've got access to a pig farm so getting rid of the bodies isn't a problem, moving the bodies could be .


For when disagreeables meet with your lethally short temper, I highly recommend ordering from the pages of the latest Steel Smelting Suppliers catalog. You can DIY a smelter in your basement hot enough to melt air.

Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

In school I got Bookworm a lot due to my uncanny ability to read and navigate the school grounds without ever looking up. They assumed echo-location, it's called peripheral vision.

After high school I've gained some descriptors and titles -
The Mighty John is one that gets thrown about after I accomplish something cool.

But for the most part when people call me by a nickname it's usually just Cap'n, or Cap'n John for my love of Pirates. I usually dress up special for International Talk Like A Pirate Day (it's this saturday people!).

The Exchange

The Jade wrote:
For when disagreeables meet with your lethally short temper, I highly recommend ordering from the pages of the latest Steel Smelting Suppliers catalog. You can DIY a smelter in your basement hot enough to melt air.

It's easier and cheaper to get a small well digger and a meat grinder. Nobody ever digs down to the water table.

On topic-
Sandman was one I had for a bit while younger and more prone to tossing the hands around.
Patrick Swayze Hips was bequeathed unto me by quite a few women over the years for certain horizontal ummmm..... abilities?... that I displayed. RIP my brother, your movies shall be missed sir.
Kip Winger because I bore a striking resemblance to him when I was a bit younger and 40 lbs lighter and my hair is still almost exactly like his even now(maybe 2-3" shorter). Don't you think I feel the pain.
I don't know if "male slut" counts as a nickname but I've been called that quite a bit over the years too. The rest are just too dirty to mention....

Liberty's Edge

Used to work in a seafood department of a grocery store. My friends used to call me "Fishboy". Now that I've grown up, I can proudly call myself "Fishman".


I'm called "truchis" very rarely, spanish nickname. I won't explain! :P

The Exchange

James Keegan wrote:
I get stupid ones. But once, one of my teachers referred to one of my paintings as a "Post-Apocalyptic Cezanne". So that's sort of a nickname, even if no one wanted to pick it up.

Really? A painting...of what? A zombie corpse, empty bakebean tins, and some spent shotgun cartidges?

"We're recommending canned goods and shotguns to all our clients..."

Scarab Sages

I've had two nicknames that stuck with me for any length of time.

The first was when I attended the University of Southern Mississippi. In the dorm, my roomate was a highschool buddy named Jake. At the time the TV show Jake and the Fatman was popular. So, couple my roomies name with my very pale skin and you get Jake and the Whiteman. So, Whiteman became the nickname I was known by for several years (and some folks still use it to this day.

My second, and longer lasting nickname, is the one I use as my screen name - Aberzombie. It was given to me by my original gaming group, one of whom is also on these boards as Iconoclasticscream.

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