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57. Brutok, the Shoanti Blacksmith with the 22" Biceps. Brutok is extremely over-protective, he only allows his only daughter to work when he's there...and you just pinched her lovely bottom...the bartender, an old adventuring buddy of Brutok just smiles, and grabs his large heavy crossbow and sets it on the counter, ready to skewer anyone foolish enough to draw a weapon on Brutok.
39. Any paladin. (what are they doing in a bar anyway, its like a cop at a rave.)What are you talking about? A paladin can drink!
Cops can drink too, but do you realy want one around when your tring to have some fun?
Cops can drink too, but do you realy want one around when your tring to have some fun?
The LAST thing you want around while trying to have some fun is a drunk cop (or paladin for that matter)
51. Milton Waddams, "Excuse me? Excuse me, bartender? May I speak to you please? I asked for a Dwarven ale, and they brought me Elven wine, and I said Dwarven Ale, but this is clearly an Elven wine" He uses the fight as an excuse to burn down the tavern.
Point.
Alvin, Alliance tool, 'cause you won't drink to the Alliance and yer wearing brown on Unification Day.
Beautiful elven princess, because she has not lost that lovin' feeling.
Anyone, anytime because the wizard used Ventriloquism to yell 'Food fight!'
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63. A group of mismatched adventurers were drinking their sorrows away after losing a friend horribly in the ruins they just failed to fully explore. Emotions boil over as soon as you enter the bar, with the group either starting to fight amongst themselves that spills over to the surrounding tables, or some of them pick one with you after something about your manner sets them off.
64. A down on his luck guardsman who has been unable to solve the issue of a recent rash of murders is getting himself drunk and angry enough to go after his prime suspect in an attempt that is almost certainly suicide. He does not react well with anyone trying to stop him or anyone that reminds him of any of the suspects or possibly victims involved in the case.
Lets not foeget the first level mage that things he's more powerful than these measily peasent rable now that he can cast Color spary and they will all fall before his arcane might.
Or the priest of Lovitar that feels everyone should experiance as much pain as possible so a few insults here and spell or two there and it's massive pandamonium. That trick is best employed at festivles not just simple bar fights.
If your allowing the Book of Erotic Fantasy the grope cantrip can lead to all sorts of hilarity when the table two tables away from you is all guys and the table next to them are all guy and after a few repeated gropes under the barbarians loin cloth he rages at everybody.
RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16
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65. A githzerai fighter/sorcerer, extremely pissed off that you called him a "gish."
66. A Shoanti, who caught you staring at his tattoos.
67. A halfling prizefighter with a Napoleon complex; when you said "forty camps" he thought you said "shorty pants."
68. A militant Rahadoumi and masked priest of Razmir having a "civil religious discussion." You're caught in the crossfire.
71.Mr. Fishy because Charisma is Mr. Fishy's dump stat and Mr. Fishy rolled a one when talking to himself.
72.Ulfen requesting "Freebird".
74. The tipsy orangutan you just called a monkey.
"Ook!"
80. a japanese schoolgirl, because you asked her if she liked tentacles.
80. a japanese schoolgirl, because you asked her if she liked tentacles.
Don't forget her hyperdimensional hammer and ... umm ... "high hit point total" ...
75. A human fighter with a goatee wearing an orange and yellow knitted cap with tassles and a fuzzy ball on top.
"My momma made this hat!!"
:D
81. A Tiefling uses their Darkness SLA for kicks and giggles. Chaos ensues.
You see a man in a bar wearing a hat like that, you know he's not afraid of anything.75. A human fighter with a goatee wearing an orange and yellow knitted cap with tassles and a fuzzy ball on top.
It makes a statement. It's... cunning.
The Half-orc Bard beating his lute and growling what seems to be lyrics; resulting in one big mosh pit...
Rodan bounty hunter, because a Hutt placed a bounty on a human smuggler.
6. Jack Scurvy, pirate, because ye asked him 'ow 'e got th' hook.
Si Clops, the cyclops because Jack Scurvy keeps saying "Eye-eye, Cap'n"
86. A sargent in the town guard who is full of himself and has a few too many drink.
Why? The cute blonde half-elf who has been returning your gaze from the end of the bar is fed up with Sargent McFeelyhands' unwanted advances. You look like the capable sort and she's played the guard's macho-streak into challenging you so that you'll knock him out. Of course, there's the matter of his squad jeering him on too...
87. The blood pig hooligans who's team were just thrashed, and you just happen to be wearing the winning teams colours.
88. Someone throws a chair... that always works according to Boondocks.
The 20th level kobold fighter, because you have SERIOUSLY underestimated him.
Seriously. Is it even possible to underestimate the kolbold I mean they practicly throw themselves on your weapons and your EXP metter goes through the roof. How can you underestimate a race that was built to be fodder, my guess is their gods built them as a joke out of leftovers but they caught on.
Chuck Norris because... HELLLLOOOO... he's Chuck Norris and YOU aren't.
Barry the animated barstool.
Because you sat on his face.
Some people pay good money for that.
Seriously. Is it even possible to underestimate the kolbold I mean they practicly throw themselves on your weapons and your EXP metter goes through the roof. How can you underestimate a race that was built to be fodder, my guess is their gods built them as a joke out of leftovers but they caught on.
Seriously. Is it even possible to underestimate the kolbold I mean they practicly throw themselves on your weapons and your EXP metter goes through the roof. How can you underestimate a race that was built to be fodder, my guess is their gods built them as a joke out of leftovers but they caught on.*coughs politely*
Huzzah!
92. Lilith beats up Steven in the bar because he had the temerity to insult duh big K.
93. The first rule of Fight Club is that you do not talk about Fight Club.
EDIT: added the other rules...
2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about FIGHT CLUB.
3rd RULE: If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out the fight is over.
4th RULE: Only two guys to a fight.
5th RULE: One fight at a time.
6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes.
7th RULE: Fights will go on as long as they have to.
8th RULE: If this is your first night at FIGHT CLUB, you HAVE to fight.
94 A noble's daughter disguised as a man to go to the bar and is overcompensating in being "manly".
95 The guy you just bumped is wanted and very paranoid.
96 When you spilled your drink on another patron, his disguise washed off.
97 When you slapped him on the back, the charm wore off.
98 Someone just cast a Dispel Magic nearby and the polymorph wore off.
99 When you spilled his drink, the assassin that poisoned it gets mad.
100 All of the above
Seriously. Is it even possible to underestimate the kolbold I mean they practicly throw themselves on your weapons and your EXP metter goes through the roof. How can you underestimate a race that was built to be fodder, my guess is their gods built them as a joke out of leftovers but they caught on.*coughs politely*Huzzah!
92. Lilith beats up Steven in the bar because he had the temerity to insult duh big K.
HMMM well that was eye opening. seriously a freaking 27th lvl kobold wow. Now I'm gonna have to order that just to see what kind of evil goodness is inside. No insult was intended to your work up until now I had no idea kobolds were anything other than a joke race kindda like gully dwarves or kender.
your not going to deny me cookies over this are you?
HMMM well that was eye opening. seriously a freaking 27th lvl kobold wow. Now I'm gonna have to order that just to see what kind of evil goodness is inside. No insult was intended to your work up until now I had no idea kobolds were anything other than a joke race kindda like gully dwarves or kender.
your not going to deny me cookies over this are you?
In retrospect, the CR calculations for kobolds have always been a little wonky...I imagine said CR 27 kobold should be a couple points lower...but he's still a viable threat, particularly once you read about his antics. Heck, once you read about all of the four kobold's antics. (There are a couple of errata in the book, read them in the associated product thread.)
No cookie denial has been enforced...but watch what you say around my beloved critter beasties, else I shall send that paragon kobold sorcerer after you. :)
102. The Dire Weasel steed of the 27th level Kobold because Kobolds (and their steeds) don't believe in fighting fair... and the weasel is hoping to snake a cookie or two.
103,104,105,106: Four "Master of Spring(s)" Monks who have heard of your unique fighting style and have agreed to attack you to thin out the numbers for the one-on one combat to decide who will be the solo “Master of Spring.”
[It may be they have you confused with someone else, but their sense motive rolls stink so they do not beleive you.]
(Extra credit goes to those who get the AD&D reference.)
107. The small, wizened old Monk, sniffing a daisy... appropriate for a Grand Master of Flowers who is sizing up which one (#103-#106) he'll have to kill next to retain his title.