Just take off? I watched a documentary a long time ago where this kid is left Home Alone, they will have fun and learn valuable life lessons and get to fight crime. :D
Inexpensive hotel with a pool.
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Just take off? I watched a documentary a long time ago where this kid is left Home Alone, they will have fun and learn valuable life lessons and get to fight crime. :D
Actually, my son would start a Lord of the Flies tribe a la Bart Simpson. Problem is, if I'm there, I'll end up like the kid with the conch.
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Relax, young padawan. They will sense your fear and feed upon it if you don't remove your feelings from you.
Best advice I can give you. Make and keep to a schedule. Start out by placing meals in, add some activities (yes, even TV time is an activity, I like the Sprout channel lately but depending on age you can toss in Noggin, Disney Channel, PBS, etc.), make sure you have the 'kids roughhousing with you' time and a few other good physical stuff. That stuff will help wear them out and ensure that they fall asleep better to provide you with a mostly clear evening to rebuild your energy reserves.
I usually start my kids (3 and 5) bedtime routine at 7:00-7:15 and after prayers, stories, and songs, they go to sleep and I am free from 7:45 on.
You were military, keep to the schedule like it's a day-long military exercise. My wife doesn't respect the plan and they chew her up bad on my game nights (usually about 2ish hours!). You would think she watched them for a full day or something after that.
Also figure out individual times. Let one color(for example) while you do some one-on-one with the other, then switch.
If done right you can have the kids lovin' the day with dad, garner the respect of the wifey, and actually not work as hard.
Good luck.
*who am I kidding, he's a goner! Riese is gonna need to farm out for a new DM.*
;P
Soda and pizza for 3 days straight. You'll be their hero for the rest of your life.
They're old enough for D&D right?
You could run them through Porphyry House Horror, or just do the Mammy Graul and her kids part from Hook Mountain Massacre.
Although, I'm sure if you asked nicely, Sebastian would teach you all to play Bella Sara.
Hmmm....probably not helping.
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Pre-planning is your friend. Pre-cooked or frozen meals that you can heat up quickly – try to organise that for as many meals over the three days as you can. Arrange some outfits for them in advance and stack them together in the wardrobe so you don’t have to mull over what they should wear each day.
Know their usual weekday schedule, even if you’re not going to exactly stick to it. If their mom takes them to the playground on Tuesday afternoons, you probably should too. If they tell you they always get icecream when they go out, you should know whether or not they’re trying to pull a fast one.
If you need to take a break for an hour or so, a dvd they can all enjoy can work wonders.
I dont know their ages so Im going out on a limb here.
Teach them the history of METAL! (or at least the Rainbow/Sabbath/Purple/Whitesnake family tree. And then send me a copy!)
Show them all your old vhs' of Headbangers Ball.
Let them make puppets of Ace, Paul, Gene and Peter and help them re-enact KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park!
nahh.
Youtube is fun, there's scads of old Tom n Jerry and Looney Tunes on there.
If they're older, making a stop-action film with yer camcorder and action figures is a fun way to spend an afternoon with the tykes (especially with all the mistakes and so what if the final product only lasts a minute...they'll remember it forever!)
Do you have a basement? If so, then all you need is a few chains and shackles.
The good news is with this plan, you only need a single set of shackles. The best behaved stay up top, any miscreants become "an example."
Make and keep to a schedule.
So that's what I've been doing wrong.
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Take them to a park and let them run wild. Pack lunch, snacks, lots of water, and a lite dinner. Make sure to take a DS, PSP, PHB, DMG, any Paizo material, or other forms of entertainment for when they meet friends and forget all about you. At the end of the day head home, talk with them in the car about their day, they will get all excited and talk probably non-stop to tell you about every little detail, sit back as you drive and enjoy their youth and innocence.
If you do this for three days, switch it up a little by taking them out to dinner (pizza or whatever they like best) one night, then ice cream the next, and they will love you even more than they already do.
You only need one thing: a blowgun with curare-laced darts.
Kid acts up - *THWIP* - dart in the neck.
He's asleep for hours and remembers little when he wakes up.
EDIT: God, but whatever you do, don't let them seize the blowgun!
ROFLMAO
Have theem watch PSYCHO. They'll be pretty subdued after that.That is, til they go to bedtime...
Yeah, you should go with Evilturnip's idea. Then you can say it's 'not your fault' when the kids horses starve to death.
I'll babysit for you!
Medicate them. It's what my parents did.
/thinks if he should comment and decides better of it.
I'll babysit for you!WOO HOO!
Can I ship them airfreight?
They just arrived. Such sweet angels, can't imagine what you concern was.
I'll babysit for you!Will you babysit for me?
I can put my head in your lap while you read me a story.
Do you promise to behave yourself?
Ok, here goes.......
Once upon a time, there were three bears.
What were their names?
Were is past tense...it implies that the children are no longer with us....did I miss something?
What were their names?Were is past tense...it implies that the children are no longer with us....did I miss something?
Demogorgon's two heads and a red dragon?
I think he was referring to the three bears you mentioned.What were their names?Were is past tense...it implies that the children are no longer with us....did I miss something?
Oh, Oh my, I am slow. Thank you for the tip!
Ummmmm....what were their names...
Ummm.....yea, what he said....Larry, Mo, and Curly Joe.
Anyway's, so Larry, Mo, and Curly Joe decided to go for a walk one day. Umm....they lived in the forest, right outside of this little town.
Shhhhhh.....I think Snorter's sleeping!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIEEEEEEEEEE!!!
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How old are your kids and where's the nearest McDonalds/Chuck E. Cheese/ Minigolf course?5, 3, and 9 months.
I don't know about wrangling them alone at Chucky Cheeses...
There goes the hell week idea too. Tell you what, swing by my house, we'll stick them in the backyard with my 5 year old, 3 year old, and 18 month old, and we'll hang out, compare notes between the Army and the Air Force, and when my wife gets home we'll head up to the local steak house (fresh killed beef every day) while she watches them and you can have a break.