Karrin turns back to Olli.
"Oh, that's who I work for," Karrin says to Olli, "they seemed to think that they were kinda a big deal or something, powerful I guess, and I'm supposed to wait here for instructions, so I was thinking that I should charge some of my food and drink to them, cuz they're making me wait and stuff. If I wrack up a huge tab then they might hurry with those instructions!
"So I was going to ask the serving lady here if I could open a tab, I mean otherwise they're asking me to provide my own room and board, which is their responsibility if I'm on retainer for them. I mean I gotta pay if I'm between employers, but they're asking me to say here, so I figure they should pick up some of the expenses. I gotta pay for drinks but they should pay for food."
O.L.L.I shifts in his seat a bit
" This unit has not made the acquaintence of the being known as Spiral Hal'oigt, but he hears many things about him and his trading company."
O.L.L.I gazes over at Karrin
"He is a very powerful merchant prince in Sigil. He is known to hire many mercenaries, and the information that this unit has heard places many of his transactions on the Lower Planes. One can surmise from these two facets of information that the cargo he delivers is sensitive and attracts attention that requires an armed response."
O.L.L.I puts his hand over Karrin's sauce-smeared digits
"Please be careful friend Karrin."
That's 60 old frosty."
"Old Frosty, eh?" Shactal huffs
"Here goes nuthin'. Call the Kobold's Virtue again ...20
The dice twirl in Shactal's claw. He releases them, and they clatter down the scarred mahogany table
"Right on tha pip! That gives me 55. Goaty? Roll big or buy."
O.L.L.I shifts in his seat a bit" This unit has not made the acquaintence of the being known as Spiral Hal'oigt, but he hears many things about him and his trading company."
O.L.L.I gazes over at Karrin
"He is a very powerful merchant prince in Sigil. He is known to hire many mercenaries, and the information that this unit has heard places many of his transactions on the Lower Planes. One can surmise from these two facets of information that the cargo he delivers is sensitive and attracts attention that requires an armed response."
O.L.L.I puts his hand over Karrin's sauce-smeared digits
"Please be careful friend Karrin."
"Thanks for the warning! I'll keep my eyes open for sure. But you don't need to worry about me Olli, I'm a mercenary, and that means I don't die for causes . . . if things get dangerous, or they ask me to do things I know aren't right, then I'll leave. It's really a no brainer. I always use violence as a last resort (even though I'm really, really good at it).
"Besides you don't get to head of some trade company by taking risks, and sending a young, highly talkative, possibly inexperienced tiefling out on a potentially dangerous or sensitive mission doesn't sound like a good risk to me. Chumps like me get stuck guarding warehouses full of grain or something, least that's what Gro-Nogark said, he's this orc mercenary I know, and he seemed to think that I'd get a lot of low paying jobs or something. He's really strong, and I think very experienced, but I think I could take him . . . once I learn better spells and get a better axe!"
"I've got just tha thing fer yeh. Be right back with yer food folks."Sharinda hustles off towards the kitchens
Smokey grins and leers as Sharinda hustles away.
Then gazes around the room thinking 'Bunch of ugly freaks!'
A train of three small serving wenches emerge from the kitchens laden down with platters of food and mugs of various liquid concoctions. They bustle up to the table and begin to dispense heaping platters of seared lamb chops, crocks of butter-laced mashed potatoes, piles of fragrant steamed green beans, a mountain of melted-cheese garnished nachos, mounds of sauce-sticky chicken wings, golden deep-fried curly fries, salt-kissed briny pickles, a full round of crumbly blue-veined cheese, a still-warm loaf of freshly baked bread, a crock of fresh churned butter, a pitcher of water with lemon slices swirling in it, a bowl of assorted eggs of various sizes, and condiments galore.
Sharinda supervises the operation, and starts dispensing the libations to the party.
"Here ya go ducks, one pitcher of grog, one Medium Clockwork Oil, one glass of grain alcohol, and a special drink for Romeo."
Sharinda turns to Smokey and hands him a large glass. The drink is greenish, and fulminates slightly, emitting a faintly nauseous fog. A hunk of frozen something floats in the noxious fluid, looking like a chunk of an eviscerated grub of enormous size with a miniature humanoid head frozen in a grimace of agony.
"One Bloody Apocalypse, probably the foullest drink we serve. Course it doesn't hold a candle to you handsome. That'll be 7 gold if ya please."
Sharinda puts her small hand out to Smokey in anticipation of payment.
Karrin starts rubbing her hands and licking her lips.
Shactal looks around for the wayward bariaur
"Now where did that rotten goat go?"
Peering around, Shactal spies Thorn engaged in conversation with the young Tiefling dancer he had been leering at previously.
"Oi! One last roll Goaty an' yeh can go back to chasin' skirt!"
The loud yell cuts through the buzz of conversation like a knife, leaving the entire crowd staring at Shactal.
" Soddin' hormonally overcharged berk." Shactal mutters to no one in particular
Sharinda turns to Smokey and hands him a large glass. The drink is greenish, and fulminates slightly, emitting a faintly nauseous fog. A hunk of frozen something floats in the noxious fluid, looking like a chunk of an eviscerated grub of enormous size with a miniature humanoid head frozen in a grimace of agony."One Bloody Apocalypse, probably the foullest drink we serve. Course it doesn't hold a candle to you handsome. That'll be 7 gold if ya please."
Sharinda puts her small hand out to Smokey in anticipation of payment.
"Yer cute. ... How about I give you 20 g.p., I drink this down all-at-once like, and you rename it the 'Smokey Bogwash' because 'Bloody Apocalypse' is a silly ass name but it looks like smoky bogwash and ... and I'm Smokey Bogwash and ...and ... " Smokey trails off as the fumes begin to effect him. After staring into the fog coming off the drink like a fortuneteller seeing the destruction of worlds in her crystal ball, he comes back to this surreality with a start declaring resolutely: "And I'm the one who's going to drink it!!"
"Yer cute. ... How about I give you 20 g.p., I drink this down all-at-once like, and you rename it the 'Smokey Bogwash' because 'Bloody Apocalypse' is a silly ass name but it looks like smoky bogwash and ... and I'm Smokey Bogwash and ...and ... " Smokey trails off as the fumes begin to effect him. After staring into the fog coming off the drink like a fortuneteller seeing the destruction of worlds in her crystal ball, he comes back to this surreality with a start declaring resolutely: "And I'm the one who's going to drink it!!"
Karrin looks to her companions, "Anyone gonna guess what's going to happen to him when he drinks that? I'm going to guess he'll be turned into a hansom prince . . . either that or his belly explodes and he dies . . . I hope he turns into a prince though, I don't want to pick dwarf bits outa my nachos!"
"Yer cute. ... How about I give you 20 g.p., I drink this down all-at-once like, and you rename it the 'Smokey Bogwash' because 'Bloody Apocalypse' is a silly ass name but it looks like smoky bogwash and ... and I'm Smokey Bogwash and ...and ... " Smokey trails off as the fumes begin to effect him. After staring into the fog coming off the drink like a fortuneteller seeing the destruction of worlds in her crystal ball, he comes back to this surreality with a start declaring resolutely: "And I'm the one who's going to drink it!!"
Sharinda pockets the proferred 20 gold pieces
"I don't name 'em, I just serve 'em. Yeh gotta swallow the frozen larva chunk to truly experience the drink handsome."
Sharinda leans towards O.L.L.I and whispers in his ear
" Yeh wouldn't have some poison curing magic on hand would you? I didn't think he'd be barmy enough ta drink that swill. I wuz gonna serve it to yer devil friend when he balked."
“Actually luv, it’s not exactly yer skirt I’m interested in,” Thorn tells the young lady. “Don’t mind Snowy there, he’s just frustrated ‘cos he hasn’t had any in a few centuries. Back in a mo’”.
Thorn wanders back over. “Spose I may as well just buy the drinks, but I’ll give lady luck one more chance to smile on me,” he says (somewhat grumpily), picking up the dice. “Let’s call it twenty again,” he adds.
“Rightio,” he says, this time dispensing with the cursing and settling for rolling his eyes. “Did I lose yet? What are you ladies having?”
"I think I'll try something exotic.... make it hot sake. It's a little chilly over here by Shac. So, does this place ever close? I'm pretty sure I've been drinking for 24 hours straight. Well... with a break."
"This looks like a truly excellent establishment. Look at all the pleasant people."
<Waves at Karrin.>
"Hello. Very Pleased to meet you, my name is Vikramenda."
<Waves at Thorn, Shac, and Eir.>
"Many blessings to you, hello!"
<Back to Karrin and Olli.>
"Do you mind if I take a seat young lady? Greetings My Modron friend, many blessings!"
<Eir nods at the newcomer and then looks back at Shac and rolls her eyes.>
"Nirvana"
"This looks like a truly excellent establishment. Look at all the pleasant people."
<Waves at Karrin.>
"Hello. Very Pleased to meet you, my name is Vikramenda."
<Waves at Thorn, Shac, and Eir.>
"Many blessings to you, hello!"
<Back to Karrin and Olli.>
"Do you mind if I take a seat young lady? Greetings My Modron friend, many blessings!"
Hello Vikranemandi . . . Vikrath . . . can I call you Vic?" Karrin leans over to Olli and whispers, "do you know this guy?"
Karrin smiles as the last plate is piled onto the table, then, somewhat amazingly, Karrin pauses and clasps her hands together in prayer.
"Thank ye, mighty Rao for your blessings," she mumbles before her prayers go silent. Karrin continues to pray silently for a moment longer before her head snaps up in a smile, "Oh, boy! Let's eat!"
Karrin rips into the table of food like a hurricane into a trailer park. There seems to be a method to her madness however, the plate of curly fries ends up close to Ashura, and a couple of chicken wings somehow end up on Serpico's plate. Other then that Karrin seems like a mindless eating machine for the next half hour . . . and then, with the mashed potatoes, lamb chops, greens, half a loaf of bread, and a good portion of the side dishes gone, she begins to slow.
<Eir nods at the newcomer and then looks back at Shac and rolls her eyes.>
"Nirvana"
I don't get this Mechanus/Nirvana thing, they just don't seem to fit in my cosmology.
Shactal stares over at the new arrival
"That lot. At least they aint as random as Limbo."
Shactal leans down to Thorn
"Get me another Bloody Apocalyse Goaty. That'll hafta be the last fer me, I think anti-peak must be comin' soon and I gots scrolls to mind."
"Do you mind if I take a seat young lady? Greetings My Modron friend, many blessings!"
O.L.L.I swivels his large eyes to the newcomer.
"Please take a seat noble sir. This unit's appelation is Oil Lube Initiallizer, but beings of his acquaintance call him O.L.L.I. May this unit have the pleasure of your appellation?"
Sharinda, still waiting to call for medics if Smokey actually gets up the courage to quaff the Bloody Apocalypse, notices the newcomer at the table
"Welcome, cutter. Will yeh be needin' any food or bub?"
Sharinda starts gathering up the emptied plates in front of Karrin.
"Always like to see a bint with a healthy appetite." Sharinda beams
"Please take a seat noble sir. This unit's appelation is Oil Lube Initiallizer, but beings of his acquaintance call him O.L.L.I. May this unit have the pleasure of your appellation?"
"My good friend, I would please me tremendously if you would call this unit Vik, it's indeed so much trouble to say my full name. I am setting out on a great adventure to see the planes. May I ask why you have come here, sir?"
"Always like to see a bint with a healthy appetite." Sharinda beams
"Oh my yes, I have an aunt like this myself, although she weighs about 500 lbs. May I ask good lady if the establishment can prepare foods with the spice known as curry?"
Sharinda, still waiting to call for medics if Smokey actually gets up the courage to quaff the Bloody Apocalypse, notices the newcomer at the table
"Welcome, cutter. Will yeh be needin' any food or bub?"
Sharinda starts gathering up the emptied plates in front of Karrin.
"Always like to see a bint with a healthy appetite." Sharinda beams
Seeing the concern in her eyes, Smokey suspects this might be a way out. If she-of-the-cavernous-womb -- the goddess who tortures Smokey through his nightmares -- won't let him kill himself, perhaps a 'bloody apocalypse' will help. To ensure no one tries to resuscitate him, Smokey stands on his chair and yells: "Bow down and worship she who copulates with forces unknown and splurts out the universe. Let the beautiful assymetrical children rise and gnaw on your bones." and then knocks back the bloody apocalypse.
"Bye meatcheeks," he says to Sharinda "Thanks for the drink."
"Oh my yes, I have an aunt like this myself, although she weighs about 500 lbs. May I ask good lady if the establishment can prepare foods with the spice known as curry?"
"Sure can, luv ... did yeh have something in mind? I could get the kitchen to do a nice lamb curry and ..."
At this moment, Smokey decides to bolt the foul drink down
"Bye meatcheeks," he says to Sharinda "Thanks for the drink."
Sharinda's face loses all color as the rancid gnome chugs the fizzing greenish liquid down .
"By the Queen of Air and Darkness!"
Sharinda yells out across the room "Phoebus!"
My good friend, I would please me tremendously if you would call this unit Vik, it's indeed so much trouble to say my full name. I am setting out on a great adventure to see the planes. May I ask why you have come here, sir?"
O.L.L.I blinks once and takes a small sip of his Medium Clockwork Oil.
"I am in this Inn to acquire, sift and coallate information, what the inhabitants of this unit's adopted city call 'darks'. This unit has found that information collection is a lucrative business. This unit also promised to buy his co-worker a drink."
O.L.L.I gestures over at Shactal
" What type of adventure are you currently on new friend Vik?"
TO Sharinda:
"Lamb curry please," he shouts to Sharinda as she bellows an alarm, "and pale ale."
TO everyone:
"This is spectacular, I so dearly wished I didn't miss the beginning of the show!"
TO OLLI:
"I simply wish the pleasure of meeting the many persons of the great wheel, and to see the sights. Everyone is so nice."
Karrin continues to listen but but feverishly works her cutlery, cutting and buttering bread with her knife, shoveling mashed potatoes into her mouth with her spoon, and spearing green beans, pickles, and curly fries with her fork. Karrin is clearly very dexterous.
Her eyebrows raise at the mention of the new type of food. Her head turns briefly to Vic when he mentions 'show' and when he says that people on the planes are "so nice"
Sharinda yells out across the room "Phoebus!"
The large lizardman gets up from the bar and hustles over to the now-prone gnome. He is dressed in a fur kilt arraingement and his scaly body is decorated with many swirls of iridescent paint. He carries a staff of gnarled wood holding a shining green gem in a cleft at the top. A small silver skullcap perches on the very top of his head. There are several pounds of assorted jewelery draped on his hulking form, and a pebbly hide bandoleer of a strange violet hue girds his midsection. Several strange jewel-like objects seem to be embedded into the flesh on his forehead.
"Hmmm .... "
The large lizardman kneels down to check the small figure, muttering several words in a basso voice and making curious passes over the rigid gnome with his clawed hands.
"I think he will recover. The drink seems to have paralyzed him, but he will need some rest and recovery. I sense a deep sickness in this little one's soul, perhaps I can work on him in my chambers."
Phoebus gently gathers the paralyzed gnome up and carries him back towards the back hallway.
"I simply wish the pleasure of meeting the many persons of the great wheel, and to see the sights. Everyone is so nice."
O.L.L.I swivels to see his new friend.
"There are many wonderful and novel people and places on the Great Wheel. Of course, this unit has also seen many terrifying and incomprehensible things as well."
O.L.L.I gestures to the prone gnome being tended to by the lizardman.
"This unit can study it all he can, but the chaotic nature of some beings is beyond his comprehension."
Shactal glances over to the paralyzed gnome holding an empty glass.
"Oi! That lawn ornament stole my drink!"
Shactal grumbles darkly, causing goosebumps to all in sonic range.
"Pike it. I'm history. Be seein yeh Eir. Be a stranger Goaty."
Shactal clumps off to the exit
"Later Shac!"
"GOds... I so frackin'g exhausted. I'm gonna sidle off to the back and have a coffee."
<Eir wanders off to a private booth and passes out, slumped over a table before she can order.>
"Lamb curry please," he shouts to Sharinda as she bellows an alarm, "and pale ale."
After seeing Phoebus take control of the situation, Sharinda recovers her poise quickly
"No worries luv. Some lamb curry, a pale ale and some warm naan bread coming right up for yeh."
Sharinda bustles off towards the kitchen, muttering softly
"Why do the barmies always show up on my shift?"
"THis is simply wonderful, I have not had durry for 3 weeks! My dear lady, what time does the next show start?"
<To OLLI and Karrin.>
"The actors were marvellous."
The actors were marvellous."
O.L.L.I. takes another sip of his amber-colored drink
"This unit thinks, new friend Vik, that it was a case of life as a performance. This unit recalls a quote by some Prime philosopher on this subject:
All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players
"This unit must admit there is quite a performance daily on this stage."
O.L.L.I pauses to wave at the rapidly receding carapaced back of Shactal
"Goodbye honored co-worker Shactal!"
All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players
"Ah yes I have read this. It comes from the prime world known as Earth, am I correct? The same dramatist also wrote more somberly that: <Vik pauses, his face overcome with a look of deep stress and sadness, his accent almost disappears.>
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
Such sad words.... <pauses and looks off into space> Well, I could eat an Elephant."
Vik is thinking that it looks like Karrin just has.
Such sad words.... <pauses and looks off into space> Well, I could eat an Elephant."
Karrin pauses (after finishing the plate with the lamb chops) long enough to pour herself a drink.
"What's an elephant?" Karrin asks before downing the entire mug with a single swig, her other hand moves the empty plate away, and then pulls a plate of nachos in front of her. She resumes eating while watching Vic for answers.
<This is Karrin's 5th or 6th mug of grog and her cheeks are probably starting to get a little flushed.>
As O.L.L.I starts to reply to his new friends Vik and Karrin, a frission of energy seems to flow through the entire World Serpent Inn, almost as if the power source that keeps the multiverse flowing had a hiccup.
"Interesting. This unit senses a great disturbance in the aether. Never befo ... "
O.L.L.I's next thought is interrupted by the solemn ringing of the copper bell hung at the bar. As the patrons turn as one to stare, they see Mitchifer, his normally jolly animated face drawn and sad.
"Gentlebeings of the World Serpent Inn. We have all sustained a great loss today. I ask you to drink a toast to the mighty Xagyg, a paragon among men and gods."
Mitchifer raises a large tankard filled with foaming ale.
TO XAGYG!
TO XAGYG!
"To Xagyg!"
TO XAGYG!
A large Orc dressed in pirate-style clothing raises his tankard
TO XAGYG!
"To Xagyg!"
<Lifting he face from the pool of drool.>
"To Xagyg!"
Shactal pauses at the exit to the World Serpent Inn, snatches a half-drunk bottle of whiskey from a passed out patron and chugs down a healthy gulp
TO XAGYG!
“Barkeep! One hot sake for the hot lady, and one Bloody Apocalyse for the bloody ice devil,” calls Thorn. “And … something cheap for me. Apart from the tiefling over ther.”
“Hey, who are we toasting? Oh! A demi-god a cutter can respect! To Xagyg!”
Thorn downs his drink in one go. “He was a good one, I hear,” he says quietly.
"Mu Magvg" Karrin mumbles with her mouth full of food, "road mayor of Grayrack!"
Sharinda yells out across the room "Phoebus!"
"I think he will recover. The drink seems to have paralyzed him, but he will need some rest and recovery. I sense a deep sickness in this little one's soul, perhaps I can work on him in my chambers."
Phoebus gently gathers the paralyzed gnome up and carries him back towards the back hallway.
Hearing what sounds to be a raucous toast, the twisted creature awakens from his slumber. Never one to pass up a drink, he grabs for whatever vial Phoebus keeps in his chambers, slams it back and gargles "To ... to ... ??? xawagyg?"
After a few hours of care, Phoebus manages to rouse Smokey from his drink-induced coma. Smokey awakes to find himself washed and dressed in his usual rags, but the clothes are cleaner than any time in recent memory. He awakens in a large hemispherical room, decorated with a wraparound mural of a swamp scene in late spring. A cluster of alchemical apparatus engulfs one side of the room. A strange set of three basalt stones are set into the room's wall with one on top of the others, the lower two vertical and spaced out four feet apart . Smokey lays upon a spare-looking bed decorated with greenish linen sheets and odd asymetrical down pillows. A side door opens to an alcove where a large copper tub sits, filled with gently steaming hot water.
"There little one, you should be fine now. Try to stay away from drinks made for Lower Plane inhabitants, hmm?"
Although the lizardman is a fierce-looking creature, his eyes seem friendly and his speech is deep and soothing
"I sense that all is not well with you little one. If you have a problem you need discussed, I am more than willing to try to aid you. Otherwise you can rejoin the others in the common room."
Phoebus gestures to the basalt stones set in the wall
"Just walk to the stones there and say 'The World Serpent Inn' in Common and you will be returned."
After the thunderous toasting, O.L.L.I swivels back to his new friends.
"New friend Vik, new friend Karrin, new friend Ashura, this unit has to unfortunately leave your presence. This unit is obligated to scribe several texts at the Lady's Library, and the patrons will want them completed by the end of Anti-Peak."
O.L.L.I scatters a few more gold gear-shaped coins on the table
"Allow this unit to pay for your next imbibement, and safe journeys. This unit will return soon with the information that you had requested new friend Karrin, say perhaps in three days?"
O.L.L.I pushes off his seat and trundles towards the exit.
“Hold up Olly,” calls Thorn. “I gotta go too – damn meeting in the meeting.”
He turns to Eir. “Hey, nice meeting you luv,” he says. “And all the rest too. You’re quite something, you know? Pity that tielfing wasn’t interested in a three way thing … anyways, I’ll see you around Sigil some time, or Ysgard maybe.”
With that he hurries after the modron, out the door.
“See ya Olly!” waves Ashura through a mouthful of fries. “Thanks for your help with my mech!”
After the thunderous toasting, O.L.L.I swivels back to his new friends.
"New friend Vik, new friend Karrin, new friend Ashura, this unit has to unfortunately leave your presence. This unit is obligated to scribe several texts at the Lady's Library, and the patrons will want them completed by the end of Anti-Peak."
O.L.L.I scatters a few more gold gear-shaped coins on the table
"Allow this unit to pay for your next imbibement, and safe journeys. This unit will return soon with the information that you had requested new friend Karrin, say perhaps in three days?"
O.L.L.I pushes off his seat and trundles towards the exit.
Karrin quickly swallows her food and drinks a bit of water to wash it down.
"Ok, Olli," she says, "I'll probably be here, unless I get some work, but seeing as this golden guy's forgotten about me that don't seem to likely."
“Hold up Olly,” calls Thorn. “I gotta go too – damn meeting in the meeting.”
He turns to Eir. “Hey, nice meeting you luv,” he says. “And all the rest too. You’re quite something, you know? Pity that tielfing wasn’t interested in a three way thing … anyways, I’ll see you around Sigil some time, or Ysgard maybe.”
With that he hurries after the modron, out the door.
Karrin had been more or less oblivious to Thorn's attraction to the dancer, and seeing as she's been rather uneasy sense overhearing Eir and Thorn's antics earlier in the evening, her face immediately goes pale when she hears these comments. Good thing Karrin wasn't eating or drinking at the time . . .
“Hold up Olly,” calls Thorn. “I gotta go too – damn meeting in the meeting.”
He turns to Eir. “Hey, nice meeting you luv,” he says. “And all the rest too. You’re quite something, you know? Pity that tielfing wasn’t interested in a three way thing … anyways, I’ll see you around Sigil some time, or Ysgard maybe.”
With that he hurries after the modron, out the door.
"See you on the turn of the ring, Thorn."