Vikramendra Rajanigandha's page

Vikramendra Rajanigandha, thank but Mr. Fishy isn't eating anyone today, maybe.

Oh I brought a spear, too. Come here little supper.

This looks like a good place to go fishing.

*whistling*

<casts his line into the water>

*more whistling*

You are very crass fellows. Can you not see there is a lady in our presence?

"Bye kind sir, stop by earlier than a few thousand years!"

"Oh I just mean that's where I'm going. Taataa!"

<Checks his wrist device and strolls off.>

"How's yer octopus? Good? Anything esle for the table?"

Sharinda looks around at the assembly

"Great my darling thank you kindly for your hospitality."

Vik settles his tab.

"Afraid I've got to step out for a few thousand years, see you soon."

"Eir, Karrin, Smu[b][/b]rf, Renkar, I bid you adieu until next time."

Makes his exit.

"Right. One platter of Baatorian Rock Octopus tentacles with Carceri Bitter Habanero Chile sauce for Mr. Adventurous."

Sharinda looks around.

"Oi! Where'd he go? An' where's the little blue guy?"

"Sorry about that my dear. Had a little appointment."

<Vik takes his seat again and digs into the tentacles, which are clinging both to the plate and the cutlery. Vik drags the plate around the table make crying sounds rather dramatically.>

"Excellent, Sharinda, thank you!."

Strangely, I've eaten live octopus tentacles and don't find them that adventurous anymore....

<Looks at his bracelet, which has strange symbols displayed on it. He touches it and it makes a noise.>

"Well Miss Eir, and Mr. Renkar, I am afraid I must step out for a few minutes. Please excuse me. I believe Sharinda will bring something disgusting for me, tell her I'll be just a moment."

<Vik hurries into the back.>

"We all have our foibles."

"Would you like a drink?"

"Ahhhhh. It might brighten you day to hear that hangovers don't last as long here in the World Serpent."

Vik ambles over to Eir and sits down.

"I have been observing you carefully, Miss. You are a cleric, why don't you heal yourself?"

Karrin picks up her axe and bashes herself in the face with the flat side!

Vik, who does not enjoy violence, begins looking very nervous. He mouths the word "PSYCHO" at Renkar.

To Karin, "I think I'll just watch, thank you young lady."

<Looks at Renkar.>

"That's quite the affectation he has."

<To the Sm[/b]urf.>

"Well, sm[b]urf us how you sm[/b]urfed into sm[b]urf sm[/b]urf. We are very sm[b]urf to sm[b][/b]urf."

<Smiles at Renkar slyly.>

"One wonders where such a creature comes from."

"The curry was fantastic. I would like something that is disgusting but not lethal please, the food of an unusual species, if you keep any on the premises. And another pale ale."

Vik offers the sm[b][/b]urf a finger to pull him out of the water, then a hanky.

"Having a little trouble small fellow?"

"S%#$f it off me ... S#$%F IT OFF ME!

The tiny blue creature makes a beeline for the neglected lemon-wedge filled water pitcher at the center of the table. Executing a standing leap three times his own height, the tiny blue creature cannonballs into the almost-full pitcher, spraying the table's occupants with water.

"It talks"

<He looks at the others.>

"This fellow is probably not food."

<Back at the s@#$f.>

"Are you okay my little friend. This is our drinking water."

"One time I was on a distant plane, and there were these birdlike creatures that ate nothing BUT worms. They would gather large fruit and pile them on the ground until these large worms were attracted to the rotting mess. They would caw and hop all around, spearing the worms with their long beaks. The worms were five feet long, and would often try to stangle the birdmen as they tried to eat them! It was quite a sight."

"That is a vile story, my friend Renkar. I applaud you."

"I once ate worms that were bred in the blood of a beast of burden. The breeders of these bloodworms, the Khavrak, ate them raw and living in bowls of blood from the very same creatures."

"Unfortunately, while the worms were unable to survive in the digestive tracts of my hosts, who were very hearty creatures, they were quite well adapted to mine. By the next morning I indeed needed very serious medical attention - would have died by the days end without it I'm sure. Very disgusting."

"On another world I stayed with some avian sentients, the Araakocra, for whom the delicacy of choice was the feces of a carnivorous caterpillar. Of course they neglected to tell me I was eating feces until it was in my mouth."

"I wonder if the house can provide anything for us to challenge our palates. OH SHARINDA MY BEAUTIFUL HOST, CAN YOU COME OVER HERE FOR A MOMENT!"

<Just at that moment the S#$%f begins running across the table.>

"That is so amazing. In my travels I have learned that on some planes there is no magic and the people travel through space in great machines. They have weapons that can destroy worlds, and I have heard tales told of than some can even destroy suns. It is both terrifying and amazing."

<Shovels in a load of curry.>

"What interests me most are the works of art, the music, and the poetry of the people I have studied. So wonderful, I wish to build an art gallery in a place such as this, it would be far more... moving than a... tavern."

<Braaap!.>

"Marvelous thank you young lady."

"Why thank these are quite aromatic and delicious! And hello to you my good sir!"

<nods at Serpico.>

"Sorry if I have ignored you but you just never know who can talk and who can't out here on the planes. Oh I see you can unhinge your jaw.... truly amazing!"

"When traveling your native food never tastes like home but how wonderful to have some after weeks. And who would expect to find such spices in this odd place... where ever we happen to be."

<Waves his hand around. Pushes the plate toward Karrin.>

"Have a little taste. You take some of the flat bread and scoop up the curry."

<Drinks a large swallow of beer.>

"And this beer is truly excellent. I say, when one travels one must, now and then, have something to remind one of home."

"To Xagyg!"

All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players

"Ah yes I have read this. It comes from the prime world known as Earth, am I correct? The same dramatist also wrote more somberly that: <Vik pauses, his face overcome with a look of deep stress and sadness, his accent almost disappears.>

Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

Such sad words.... <pauses and looks off into space> Well, I could eat an Elephant."

Vik is thinking that it looks like Karrin just has.

"THis is simply wonderful, I have not had durry for 3 weeks! My dear lady, what time does the next show start?"

<To OLLI and Karrin.>

"The actors were marvellous."

TO Sharinda:
"Lamb curry please," he shouts to Sharinda as she bellows an alarm, "and pale ale."

TO everyone:
"This is spectacular, I so dearly wished I didn't miss the beginning of the show!"

TO OLLI:
"I simply wish the pleasure of meeting the many persons of the great wheel, and to see the sights. Everyone is so nice."

"Please take a seat noble sir. This unit's appelation is Oil Lube Initiallizer, but beings of his acquaintance call him O.L.L.I. May this unit have the pleasure of your appellation?"

"My good friend, I would please me tremendously if you would call this unit Vik, it's indeed so much trouble to say my full name. I am setting out on a great adventure to see the planes. May I ask why you have come here, sir?"

"Always like to see a bint with a healthy appetite." Sharinda beams

"Oh my yes, I have an aunt like this myself, although she weighs about 500 lbs. May I ask good lady if the establishment can prepare foods with the spice known as curry?"

"This looks like a truly excellent establishment. Look at all the pleasant people."

<Waves at Karrin.>

"Hello. Very Pleased to meet you, my name is Vikramenda."

<Waves at Thorn, Shac, and Eir.>

"Many blessings to you, hello!"

<Back to Karrin and Olli.>

"Do you mind if I take a seat young lady? Greetings My Modron friend, many blessings!"

May the great peace of the ALL embrace you.

With all this 4E nonsense it's pretty easy to get agitated these days.

So, for the sake of all our nerves I have created this thread for you to come and relax quietly. Feel free to just sit and bask in the simple glory of emptiness, or to visualize bunnies hugging and butterflies... ummm... butterflying. Post nothing, take a bong hit, sip a beer, write a haiku, or do none or all of these.

Above all. Be mellow.

Xiao Po, the shaolin abbot, flipped through the grappling rules as he contemplated his approaching melee with the crack dragon.

Vitriolic complaint about cultural insensitivity supported with quotations from Edward Said. Explanation of the uniqueness of poster's culture and marginalization of everyone else's.

Vikramendra Rajanigandha, Vikramendra Rajanigandha, V... umm... Raj... Hurm... ummmmm.

Whatever

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