Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!
Could you give some more information, or maybe some examples?
It's kinda hard to help you, if we don't know what exactly the problem is...
Well, there's always the trask theory: just hit em with a trask. then theres the lightning bolt, and my fav: send some random vengeful monsters. that works well.
I don't name my bad guys anymore because they will often make fun of the name --
"Zerxog?"
"Zerxog."
"You're kidding right?"
"That's his name."It took a while to get back to the game...
Yeah, that's usually the problem that I have. Shukak? Ekaym Smallcask? BALSAG THE HUNTER?! From now on, all NPCs will be named "Bob" or "Jim". Even the women.
"Some call me.... Tim!!"
And yes, more vidence of stupidity plz :)
Yeah, that's usually the problem that I have. Shukak? Ekaym Smallcask? BALSAG THE HUNTER?! From now on, all NPCs will be named "Bob" or "Jim". Even the women.
You named him Balsag? You may deserve to have him made fun of. :P I've always been fond of naming my Sorcerors 'Tim'.
Although I had an old DM who would roll out random tavern names. That is, until the one female gamer's character refused to enter the Bald Beaver Inn... He stopped rolling for that afterwards.
Mark Crowfoot - he's made a career out of ridiculous ideas in D&D and has been tormenting me for years - curse him. Horizontal levitations, trained walking fire beetle cages, going off plot to shop for a suit, standing up for the really really bad guy and saying 'maybe he just had a bad dad - let him off and let him keep the treasure ' using the same plot about a thousand times i'll pretend to be a cloak salesman whilst I do this' - Oh really Mark, pull the other one - a cloak salesman eh - another cloak saleman... characters called Wan THAC0 - you name it, he's come up with something stupid for it.
"I loot the body."
"I feel left out."
Things that they've said that they've learned to regret.
Director of Sales
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"I loot the body."
...
Things that they've said that they've learned to regret.
As a player, I incurred the enmity of the DM and all the other players when my character looted a Ring of Warmth from the body of another dead PC (he met his maker from the business end of a fireball trap). Ingame, I totally got away with it.
Next session, my little Wild Mage suffered a little mishap.
cos
THer is one particular player who insists on starting a bar fight in EVERY tavern. Even if he's looking to find help. its always that stupid macho "oh you want a piece of me eh?" thing. one time he killed the guy he was going to pay him lots of money. I just cant stop him.
"I loot the body."
"I feel left out."
Things that they've said that they've learned to regret.
Yes there are quiet a lot of those sayings. The paladin is using the Lay on Hands thing and all of a sudden its "ooh I'd like her to lay hands on me!!!" And just after that the cool priesty woman "Lays her hands on your badger" And no one will ever let it go.
RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32
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THer is one particular player who insists on starting a bar fight in EVERY tavern. Even if he's looking to find help. its always that stupid macho "oh you want a piece of me eh?" thing. one time he killed the guy he was going to pay him lots of money. I just cant stop him.
Just make one of the bar patrons a retired war hero with 16 levels of fighter and Improved Unarmed Strike. That'll shut him up.
THer is one particular player who insists on starting a bar fight in EVERY tavern. Even if he's looking to find help. its always that stupid macho "oh you want a piece of me eh?" thing. one time he killed the guy he was going to pay him lots of money. I just cant stop him.Just make one of the bar patrons a retired war hero with 16 levels of fighter and Improved Unarmed Strike. That'll shut him up.
Ooooooooooh Good idear!!!
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Depending on your group, stopping the puns and jokes is very likely a lost cause. The best way to deal with that is come up with worse ones to inflict on them whenever they get uppity. Of course, that can lead to catastrophic escalation.
For PCs that want to start bar fights, the uber-NPC is too much, and will just inspire resentment and a sense of entitlement to act in the same manner.
Instead just be direct and apply appropriate consequences. If he starts fights, he develops a reputation. Tavern owners won't want him to even come in, patrons will leave the moment he does, the guards will follow him or refuse to let him enter the settlement, and so on.
You can also escalate to virtual treasure thefts. After they blow a meeting with a patron they mope around town for a few more days then see another group wandering in loaded with loot. When they ask how they got so rich, let them know they took the job with the patron they lost out on because of the brawl.
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Yah. All kritters have habits that can be exploited, even Player Characters. Like this one, that whups on folk up in a tavern.
Make him whup the bejeezus out of the Mayor/Sheriff/Duke/King's son who was slumming in the tavern to see how the "simple folk live."
And to rub salt in the wound, make sure everybody in the tavern knows who the slumming Prince is. They say, "I wouldn't mess with him if I was you." Make the prince ASK to get whupped. All running his mouth at this character who likes to fight. And make the prince like a 2nd level noble.
Then, the Prince's daddy gets to send all these guys after the party. AND the REST of the group gets to get dogged on too, because of the actions of one guy. AND, you as a dungeonmaster have a setup for many many adventures to come. It's a win win!
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RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32
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Make him whup the bejeezus out of the Mayor/Sheriff/Duke/King's son who was slumming in the tavern to see how the "simple folk live."
And to rub salt in the wound, make sure everybody in the tavern knows who the slumming Prince is. They say, "I wouldn't mess with him if I was you." Make the prince ASK to get whupped. All running his mouth at this character who likes to fight. And make the prince like a 2nd level noble.
Then, the Prince's daddy gets to send all these guys after the party. AND the REST of the group gets to get dogged on too, because of the actions of one guy. AND, you as a dungeonmaster have a setup for many many adventures to come. It's a win win!
This is genius, Heathy! I'll have to remember this the next time a tavern brawl comes up.
Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!
Tell them from the beginning who he is and build up the suspence, and chose very short names so they cant make fun of him.
Killing someone in a tavern brawl is a hanging offense. Make the rest of the party have to break him out of jail (unless they don't want to save him) before the execution.
Or fight their way out of town right after the tavern brawl.
Another alternative is to have fun with it. I mean why not. I think all of us, when we first started to play, began by wanting a bar fight. The very first module I ever bought--I was like 13--was a Mechwarrior module that starts with a big kick butt barfight between mercenaries and house regulars. I loved it!
Make games that start with barfights if that's what he likes. Come up with colorful mexican wrestler style baddies for him to fight. Have adventures spring from the fights--like a gnomish inventor who gets beat up by the character, goes off and creates some steampunk boxing suit to help him get revenge, gets beat up again...goes off an invents another bigger badder clanky thing to get revenge. Have fun with it.
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On the issue of people digging on your npc names, I have one thing to say:
Bonan the Buttbarian.
You can do it with any name; don't think subconsciously that your naming skills suck cos some smart alecky player character makes fun of your n.p.c. bbeg's name.
or......C'foolhu
"Oh, C'thulhu? I don't sweat that kid. I grab him by the tentacles and whup his aish." Meh,...whatever. It's just smack talking.
Yeah, that's usually the problem that I have. Shukak? Ekaym Smallcask? BALSAG THE HUNTER?! From now on, all NPCs will be named "Bob" or "Jim". Even the women.You named him Balsag? You may deserve to have him made fun of. :P I've always been fond of naming my Sorcerors 'Tim'.
Although I had an old DM who would roll out random tavern names. That is, until the one female gamer's character refused to enter the Bald Beaver Inn... He stopped rolling for that afterwards.
Oh, no, my good man. Bruce Cordell named him Balsag in "The Sunless Citadel". One of those names that looks great and 'bugbeary' on paper, but then you say it aloud and suddenly it's genitalia humor for a good twenty minutes.
My friend played a really dumb Warforged barbarian in the Eberron pre-packaged modules and they were chasing down a vampire in a coach. One fireball later and their horses were screaming in pain, smoking from the attack. So, my player, he says,half joking,"I'm going to try and make a repair roll on my horse."
I figure, this works for his abysmally stupid character (since he had chosen wisdom, charisma and intelligence as his dump stats) so I just tell him to make the roll. He thinks I may let him heal his horse. Not quite.
"Well, your warforged character, not quite understanding the physiology of living creatures, figures that he'll bolt and hammer the parts back together on his horse. The poor creature passes out after a few minutes and soon dies. Your character stands, covered in horse blood, befuddled that he couldn't repair such a simple beast."
I can be a little sick when people do stupid things at my table.
Yes there are quiet a lot of those sayings. The paladin is using the Lay on Hands thing and all of a sudden its "ooh I'd like her to lay hands on me!!!" And just after that the cool priesty woman "Lays her hands on your badger" And no one will ever let it go."I loot the body."
"I feel left out."
Things that they've said that they've learned to regret.
Sadly i remember that... and it is stuck in my head.
Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!
Who said it was the player messing up your plans, maybe they had a better plan and you were messing it up .
I'm currently playing in a crime style campaign (which my DM has based loosely on 24) which has very little magic (which is also restricted to the upper classes). My character is a Ranger and basically the most disgustingly foul mouthed, crude and obnoxious as i can make him.
We rescued, then questioned a carpenter who was working to a "illicit caster" we had been asked to track down and he gave this very powerful little speech about the "things" in the alledged caster's manor house, which ended with the line
Carpenter : "And I swear that during the night the statues....they move"
Me : "B$&$@$*s do they! Your off your nut mate! Here's 5 gold go see a healer or your end up in the madhouse."
Not really the response the DM was after, but totally worked in-character
He turned out to correct too.
Another good time was when the creepy old boat hag which instead of being the scary encounter it was supposed to be, just ended up with the whole party making crude innuendo at her while she boated us across the lake "my word, old hag, you certianly handle that pole proficiently". She didnt like being refered to as old hag either "im only 47! Its a hard life out here in the Silvermere Forest" .. "shut up, old hag"
I love Josef (my character) he is just so horrible to people, but at the same time a bit of hero. :D
Yeah, that's usually the problem that I have. Shukak? Ekaym Smallcask? BALSAG THE HUNTER?! From now on, all NPCs will be named "Bob" or "Jim". Even the women.I don't name my bad guys anymore because they will often make fun of the name --
"Zerxog?"
"Zerxog."
"You're kidding right?"
"That's his name."It took a while to get back to the game...
I just give NPCs names that are words, usually descriptive of their nature, so it's quite impossible to laugh at them.
I also beat my players with a rolled paper from time to time.
THer is one particular player who insists on starting a bar fight in EVERY tavern. ... I just cant stop him.
Our DM has a rule that I've found works nicely when I'm DMing as well: just because an adventure is geared towards a particular level doesn't mean that EVERYONE in the town, city, tavern, whatever is ALSO geared towards that particular level. There's lots of people wandering around that mean nothing to the plot, and that there's no plan on you interacting with in the normal course of events, that are much, much, MUCH higher level. And you never know when one if them is sitting in your tavern, minding his own business as he tried to enjoy a nice ale alone.
Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!Who said it was the player messing up your plans, maybe they had a better plan and you were messing it up .
Your plan isnt as important as the DMs plan. And your plans usually get people killed.
Re: Balsag.
1st. Always say the name aloud once and see if it's likely to get laughed at.
2nd. If so, change pronunciation slightly. Bal-SAHG. BAEL-sug. Things like that. Don't dwell on it and keep to that pronunciation and the players will likely not notice.
3rd. Don't be victimized by their taunting if it's really getting to you. Make a jibe or two about their names to point out that they aren't the best namesmiths, either. Perhaps ask if they'd like to DM, since they seem to have a better idea of how to handle it.
4th. Laugh with them. Yeah, the name might just sound funny. Have a laugh with them, show them that you're with them, and move on. Hopefully, they'll let you. If it gets to be a problem again, just ask them if they'd rather make jokes or play D&D. If it's jokes, take a break from playing until they get back on track.
It's a maturity thing mostly, although sometimes a name is just plain hard not to laugh at.
Your plan isnt as important as the DMs plan. And your plans usually get people killed.Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!Who said it was the player messing up your plans, maybe they had a better plan and you were messing it up .
If the player's plan is so good, how about he tries his hand at DMing?
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Re: Balsag.
1st. Always say the name aloud once and see if it's likely to get laughed at.
2nd. If so, change pronunciation slightly. Bal-SAHG. BAEL-sug. Things like that. Don't dwell on it and keep to that pronunciation and the players will likely not notice.
It seems like this particular name suffers from DMs pronouncing it wrong. Bal-sag. BAL should sound like Al(the name)with a 'B' in front of it. If it had 2 'L's in there then it would sound like a Genital disorder, but as it is spelled it doesn't so the only real problem with the name is goofy people who don't know how to pronounce things correctly.
FH
This won't work for everyone but I have set up a seperate forum for everyone in my gaming group to talk over the week through. It has house rules, new eapons and feats, NPC descriptions, locations, and events.
It allows me to ask characters what they plan on doig for the next session in character and then modify my adventures to fit that model.
I just give NPCs names that are words, usually descriptive of their nature, so it's quite impossible to laugh at them.I also beat my players with a rolled paper from time to time.
If you go for books as weapons make sure you grab the Players Handbook. I once had the misfortune of using the DMG which was closer at hand and its really no match against the Players Handbook which has significantly more heft behind it.
It's a maturity thing mostly, although sometimes a name is just plain hard not to laugh at.
My experience is its some kind of reverse maturity thing. The older the players are the worse it gets. It is especially bad in mixed company since then the players do nothing but talk about sex the whole evening - and its all in the form of double entendres.
It's a maturity thing mostly, although sometimes a name is just plain hard not to laugh at.My experience is its some kind of reverse maturity thing. The older the players are the worse it gets. It is especially bad in mixed company since then the players do nothing but talk about sex the whole evening - and its all in the form of double entendres.
I game with 16 year olds. That is to be expected.
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Your plan isnt as important as the DMs plan. And your plans usually get people killed.Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!Who said it was the player messing up your plans, maybe they had a better plan and you were messing it up .
No, MY plans usually get people killed. And the victim is usually ME.
I am playing with two newbies, one is the stepson of my old time gaming buddies and he wanted them to join in with d&d.
So we are playing "There is no honour"
They reach the toture chamber and I lay it on thick that this guy is twisted up on the rack with the torturer looming over him. They kill the supposed torturer,
Newbies first words to Kersh on the rack
"Have you got any money?" He is a neutral good ranger
My reply "What do you think ! I am on a ~***ing rack!
No, MY plans usually get people killed. And the victim is usually ME.Your plan isnt as important as the DMs plan. And your plans usually get people killed.Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!Who said it was the player messing up your plans, maybe they had a better plan and you were messing it up .
Ah, so it's intentional. It's usually considered a BAD plan to get yourself killed, Mr. I-like-to-randomly-insult-people-who-could-kill-me-with-thier-pinky.
I think the dumbest thing I've ever seen was a party on a dungeon crawl. Beef the fighter (yes, the player named his character Beef), was leading them when he noticed the torch begin sputtering and burning slightly blue.
"No worries! Let's keep going!"
So they continue on and begin to get light headed. Once more Beef pushes the party onward. So the DM tells them how strange it smells, and how they feel slightly sick. Ans the flame on the torch is now sparking blue (or pure blue by now, but he was trying to give them a chance).
"No worries! Let's keep going!"
So... Needless to say. Despite the DM telling htem that gas makes torches burn blue, and gas burns. And you have a torch. Beef keeps going onward.
The resulting explosion was a tpk and they never got to their first encounter.
Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!
As a player, I tend to do this intentionally. One, it sometimes keeps my character and/or the rest of the party alive longer and two, it makes the game fun for me to see the DM have to come up with on-the-spot fixes.
Now, saying that, I'm about to DM for the 1st time & I expect any/all of my evil plans to be f'd with. I just hope I'm good with the o-t-s fixes. :o)
Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!As a player, I tend to do this intentionally. One, it sometimes keeps my character and/or the rest of the party alive longer and two, it makes the game fun for me to see the DM have to come up with on-the-spot fixes.
Now, saying that, I'm about to DM for the 1st time & I expect any/all of my evil plans to be f'd with. I just hope I'm good with the o-t-s fixes. :o)
I'll just point out that I hope you know your DM is okay with this, because most will become quite angered if they even suspect you are destroying their plots for the destruction's own sake. They typically work quite hard on that stuff to make it interesting, challenging, and tailored for the characters. You'll probably come to realize this when you start DMing, and wish your characters gave you a break.
However, maybe your DM is terrible and uses nothing but railroad ties as "plot hooks," and your "sabotage" is justified. I don't know the specifics, just commenting on the general trend.
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Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!As a player, I tend to do this intentionally. One, it sometimes keeps my character and/or the rest of the party alive longer and two, it makes the game fun for me to see the DM have to come up with on-the-spot fixes.
Now, saying that, I'm about to DM for the 1st time & I expect any/all of my evil plans to be f'd with. I just hope I'm good with the o-t-s fixes. :o)
I had a guy who used to do this to me when I'd D.M. (lol) I saw it as a fun competition, and a test of my abilities.
I also relished the look of fear and realization when he figured out what my sly grin meant when it was his turn to dungeonmaster."Can I be chaotic neutral?" Mwahahahaha!!!
hehe we have a player in our group called Dave "breaker of worlds" and he always says, well, things just kinda worked out that way; shrug. People who do incredible stupid things dont tend to live long so are not as much fun.
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Ah, so it's intentional. It's usually considered a BAD plan to get yourself killed, Mr. I-like-to-randomly-insult-people-who-could-kill-me-with-thier-pinky.No, MY plans usually get people killed. And the victim is usually ME.Your plan isnt as important as the DMs plan. And your plans usually get people killed.Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!Who said it was the player messing up your plans, maybe they had a better plan and you were messing it up .
Again, usually me.
Players are always messing up my evil plots with there dumbass ideas. How do i stop them?!!!!As a player, I tend to do this intentionally. One, it sometimes keeps my character and/or the rest of the party alive longer and two, it makes the game fun for me to see the DM have to come up with on-the-spot fixes.
Now, saying that, I'm about to DM for the 1st time & I expect any/all of my evil plans to be f'd with. I just hope I'm good with the o-t-s fixes. :o)
I'll just point out that I hope you know your DM is okay with this, because most will become quite angered if they even suspect you are destroying their plots for the destruction's own sake. They typically work quite hard on that stuff to make it interesting, challenging, and tailored for the characters. You'll probably come to realize this when you start DMing, and wish your characters gave you a break.
However, maybe your DM is terrible and uses nothing but railroad ties as "plot hooks," and your "sabotage" is justified. I don't know the specifics, just commenting on the general trend.
Well, Lawgiver's my DM and he'll be one of the players at the table when I DM so I expect it to all come back to me. Karma kinda works that way. :o)