Moonflower

Sentient Coffee Bean's page

53 posts. Alias of Mairkurion {tm}.


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My beans!


Everybody loves my beans for breakfast, but sadly, everybody hates me.
Must be a case of mistaken identity.


::Sheds bean into grinder::


LIES and DAMN LIES!


Ye Olde Barista wrote:
Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:

Go ahead, do it, shake the trunk!

How about....you do it since you are so enthusiastic about it?

Are you sure you are a real barista?


Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:
Ye Olde Barista wrote:
Doodlebug Anklebiter wrote:

Go ahead, do it, shake the trunk!

How about....you do it since you are so enthusiastic about it?
[Shakes the trunk]

Yeah...shake harder!


Ye Olde Barista wrote:
Sentient Coffee Bean wrote:

Help is on the way!

Ahh my friend, excellent!!! Now just come and get in the grinder and we will help that poor little lycanthrope out!

As you can see, I'm a friendly magical coffea. Just shake my trunk until my beans fall into the grinder!


Ye Olde Barista wrote:
What is it werewolf? Does someone need coffee?

Help is on the way!


TriOmegaZero wrote:
Sex?

Coffee first means non-drowsy sex.


I know what you all need in the morning.


Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
Every summer's my birthday.

Mine too!


Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
Sentient Coffee Bean wrote:
Say hello to my little friend!
You realize i'm your natural predator, right?

You got it all wrong, man. I am a plant which showers its beneficent beans on the world. It is my Destiny!


Say hello to my little friend!


Solnes wrote:
Sentient Coffee Bean wrote:

::Sacrifices beans to the grinder::

Coffee's a brewin'!

I still have a hate on for this avi >:/

:-(

Disassociate! I'm not some legumey jerk. I'm an enchanted talking coffee bean stalk that sacrifices its beans for your magical morning coffee. Be careful of the giant who lives in the cloud above, though. I hear he has an enchanted singing coffee bean grinder!


::Sacrifices beans to the grinder::

Coffee's a brewin'!


Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:
The Jade wrote:
I'd do what I always do when that happens. Drop trou, put out, and then refund them 23 cents.
+1

Hey, stop wasting my hard work!


Come to me, Lynora...let me entangle you in my beany limbs!


Oh I'm a magical plant!
I'm loved by your uncle and aunt!
Brew up my beans when you can't!
Afterwards you can put on your pants!


::Suddenly, from beneath CrimJ's feet, the ground stirs and one of the magic beans Mairkurion had planted -- the beans he'd traded to the old lady for AZ's femur -- begins to sprout and rapidly grow::

Happy Birthday!


taig wrote:
Mairkurion {tm} wrote:
Wait a minute, I thought every post in this thread that wasn't explicitly addressed to someone else was really intended for me! Are you SURE?
Nope. Those posts are for Carnivorous Bean (RIP).

F!@~ YOU.


Yippee!

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Solnes wrote:
Where is hubby?

Maybe the suggestion that Dunkin Donuts serves good coffee drove him away?


::Starts shedding and brewing for all the departed or unconscious posters::


::Swallows a glow stick, soft plastic pencil, a partially used Sudoku calendar, and a bottle of hot sauce::

Incoming!


Hey!
Quiet in there!
You're supposed to be turning into plant food!


::Swallows Crimson line thief::

Let's see how he will fertilize my coffee beans!


Feed me Seymour!


taig wrote:
hold monkey

Thanks, Mr. Badger!

::Blasts no longer blinking monkey with steam nozzle::


::Turns steam spout full blast on monkey::

Muahahahaha! Take that!


That's right! Coffee is nasty! Stay away from here!

::Pours boiling percolated Folgers down on the thread from the top ramparts of Castle Cafe::


Twin Agate Dragons wrote:
Twin Agate Dragons wrote:
More coffee brewing; trying something different, using cold distilled water instead of tap water.
Hmm, I think the distilled water makes a difference; the coffee tastes a little better.

See? Feel better, right?


Twin Agate Dragons wrote:
Dr. Double Honors, Ph.D. wrote:
Twin Agate Dragons wrote:
Ho hum.
Why so blasé?

Tired. Bored.

I don't know. I guess I kind of feel a liitle out of place here now.

Espresso?


Just pour boiling water into the filter and let gravity do the rest!


*Pours steaming, bittersweet life-giving ichor down his throat*


Yes... drink, drink! Partake of my bittersweet ichor and stay up all night and morning!


Did someone ask for coffee?


*Begins roasting and grinding his beans to brew coffee*


wish i had decaf


The King of Siam wrote:
Sentient Coffee Bean wrote:
The King of Siam wrote:
Did you wash your hands, shrubbery man of the scientific intravenous access starting?

They're washed by the rains, O King!

No! Idiot! Science water!

The rain is full of microbes! Microbes that will swim up my urethra!!!

My beans are brewed in distilled water, Majesty!


The King of Siam wrote:
Did you wash your hands, shrubbery man of the scientific intravenous access starting?

They're washed by the rains, O King!


The King of Siam wrote:
Sentient Coffee Bean wrote:

These posters need fuel, your Majesty. Here, drink up!

*Passes strong black coffee among the posters*

wait.....drop the scientific sweat from my palm in the ligand first.

so let it be written. so. let it be. done.

*Hooks up a coffee IV to the King of Siam.*


These posters need fuel, your Majesty. Here, drink up!

*Passes strong black coffee among the posters*


These posters need fuel, your Majesty. Here, drink up!

*Passes strong black coffee among the posters*


The King of Siam wrote:
Silence, fool! Do not boggart my shrubbery of science!

Hu-hu-hu!

Don't mic me, it will make my beans bitter. Just steep then in near-boiling water.


Woo-hoo! I'm here!


Woodraven wrote:
did all of you hit the coffee a little hard tonight

Heh-heh-heh

Time for refills!


*Extends vines through thread, serving freshly brewed coffee.*


Hair of the bean that bit ya?


Coffee, anyone?


Sure you wouldn't like to have some coffee and stay up with us, Moorluck?

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