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*eats half of rats; leaves other halves strategically located for maximal midnight impact*
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*puffs up to twice normal size; slowly circles uttering guttural profanities; sprints in random direction when nearby squirrel coughs*
*drags half-eaten thread into house and leaves it on most expensive item that will also absorb blood*
*knocks salt shaker off table for no apparent reason*
*unearths thread; eats half of it; vomits it back up onto person's head at 3:00 AM, for reasons*
*volunteers to take third shift watch; horks in everyone's empty boots for no discernible reason*
*locks eyes with rest of tavern; slowly knocks mug of ale off table for no discernible reason* |