.
As Twitchy flies around the Lizard-folk village yelling for the Queen Mother she sees the largest hut in the middle of the village is decorated with carved wood and carved bone. Most of the Lizard-folk seem to gathering around it.
The large hut’s door slams open. The largest goblin Twitchy and the others have ever seen. He is almost more hobgoblin than goblin, but his face, blue-gray skin and bulging red eyes identify him as goblin. He draws the great sword on his back, and then proceeds to stock towards Twitchy.
Wos you t’at wants me siser. T’is our ‘ome. I no know no king! He speaks in short simple sentences with a clearly foreign accent.
A lilting voice speaks from the hut “Now, Brot’er t’at is no way to greet guests w’o ‘ave yet to be violent. Maybe t’is King is bringing tribute. We Must be neig’borly, Neig’borly. It is the same accent but the voice sounds coy and teasing, yet reprimanding. The female voice says Draconic.
The lizard-folk are still shifting and looking about, but no longer seem as hostile to Twitchy’s presence. Twitchy does see one Large lizard-folk running off toward another large hut.
FINE I see w’o sent em. W’o is your king and w’o is your people. No lies, siser no like lies He says in a calmer manner than before.
Twitchy pauses a moment, thinking of the events that have led to this point.
Then she looks down at the big goblin. "I'm Twitchy, riding on Fluffer. I guess I count as one of the 'people.'" Twitchy shakes her head. She wants no part of these stupid, stupid hierarchies. Why does every goblin want to rule? Don't they know what trouble comes with the job?
"King Medge will be along shortly to talk to your Sister and probably have a dance-off with her or something. I've been told by our pompous talking cat that I'm supposed to give introductions, which I can't do if I don't know your names. So... Who are you two?"
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What's this thing about gods people believe in? Gods do not exist in this world. Primitive savages... he thinks to himself.
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Zeli fles overhead and starts squawking.
"The herald of the Alliance of Dread Pirate Goblins and Mushfens Cats announces the august presence of His Majesty, King of the Dread Pirate Goblins, The High Admiral and Unholy Terror of the Golarion Seas. Whose name would make all merchants tremble fear. Her Magnificent mount is King Mortimer of the Mushfens Cats, whose deeds would be centre of bard tales. Beside them is Ronk, the mightiest warrior of the Dread Pirate Goblins, whose battle trophies stack a mountain high. Behind him is Gurp, the all-powerful shaman of the Dread Pirate Goblins, on his mount of the most noble lineage, Squishy. The Swamp answers his beck and call. Last of all, is the vizer of the Dread Pirate Goblins, Twitchy, on her indomitable vulture, Fluffer."
Mortimer has a look of approval as Zeli commences her speech.
It is not appropriate for a King to annouce his arrival, rather a good Herald should do it for him. Like Zeli has.
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"Me Nockers. You no tribe me know but siser will know meddle."
By this point an impressively old Lizard-folk arrives. His armor is decorated with a lot bobbles and knickknacks. He is surrounded 3 guards and followed by the lizard-folk who ran off. The old Lizard-folk looks to Nockers, speaks in the Lizard-folk’s strange language. He proceeds into the large hut.
Nockers sighs deeply. He is clearly annoyed at something.
The young lithe Lizard-folk looks to the party and smiles politely. Then in an oddly proper tone he sings in prefect Goblin to the party. He begins to dance as other lizard-folk stomp, clap or add occupella background music.
“Ma 'chere Mademoiselle. (nodding toward Twitchy)
It is with deepest pride and greatest pleasure that we welcome you tonight And.
Now we invite you to relax let, us pull up a rug as the LongBite proudly presents – Queen Mother
She the Regent! Is great Divine!
Put your worth to the test
Tie your armor 'round yourself sinners,
And she'll provide the rest
Holy to winners
Hot swamp ruler.
Why we, only live to serve
She just a cougar
All deserve!
Don't believe me? (Another Lizard yells) Not A Chance!
Think their pretentious!
They can sing, they can dance
After all Gobs, no, we’re stupendous
And a greeting here is never second best
Go on, unfold your future
Take a look at the main feature
Be our guest, Be our guest, Be our guest!”
He opens the door after “take a look at the main feature” line, allowing the party to look inside the room.
Standing on the raised dais next to a large ornate fire pit stands a beautiful goblin woman. Her green skin is free of blemishes and her hair is a deep dark red. She seems to have bark, moss and green leaves as clothing, but her crown is branches, leaves and flowers in full bloom.
The young Lizard-folk walks into the room bowing to the party.
”I am Hara the herald of her most graciousness.” Hara points to the old lizard-folk to the right of the Queen, then to her right a young male Lizard-folk. "That First Enlightened Braza of the Long Bite peoples, and War Chief Drazzat the Terrible."
Hara bows even deeper to the small female goblin. “I my Queen am honored to introduce High Admiral of the Dread Pirate Goblins the King Mortimer of the Mushfens Cats, the Warrior Ronk, Gurp the Shaman, and Vizier Twitchy. This is her most gracious holiness Queen Janka of the Long Bite peoples the transcendent Mother Goddess of all collective Swamp peoples.”
“Greetings High Admiral Mortimer, welcome to my home. Tell me for what purpose are you visiting?” says the Queen in a lithe voice.
Ronk leans into Morts ear and mumbles That is not a Kitty.
Mortimer looks appreciatively at the young, lithe lizard folk named Hara. That was a far change from those closed mouth idiots that they had caught spying on their boat. Braza really should have chosen better people for the spying job, and she was really a pretty lady. He sincerely regretted that this conversation wasn't going to start on the best of terms. He really hated to offend pretty ladies and hoped that Medge would be gentle in breaking the bad news. He knew, also, that it was not his time to speak, but King Medge's.
Of course - the sight of a beautiful woman always drove what he should have been doing, like identifying her species, out of his head.
And oh...Braza was shimmering in his mage's sight as well. Mortimer's eyes widen in surprise, and he rears back a little.
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Medge has posing dramatically since Zeli’s excellent introduction. ‘Unholy Terror of the Golarion Seas’ is a new title and she really likes it. It makes her sound extra fierce! She’s quite happy with how this is going, the lizards even know how to sing a proper goblin song, but then, wait, High Admiral Mortimer???.
MEDGE is King High Admiral Terror of the Seas Fancy Lady Pirate Stabbing Stabberton! Big kitty is Mort Good Goblin Pet-Friend King of Cats and also Big Teeth!” Medge somersaults off Mort, lands on her feet, points her finger at the Queen Mother and starts to sing.
So you might have a big ol’ Gob
And a bunch of lizards with scales
But we’ve got a Ronk that likes to bonk
And a brand of swamp magic that never fails!
We’ve got a whole lot of firepower
Our Vizer Twitchy makes things go BOOM!
Mort’s big fangs make strong men cower!
You don’t wanna fight us, we bring our enemies doom!
So Queen Mother Gob, what’s it going to be?
Make deal with us!
Boat touchers become amputees!
It’s true we’ve got a lot of power
We’re awesome and deadly and strong!
You might think you could beat us
People think they can beat us, well guess what? WRONG!
We got a lot we gotta discuss!
So get ready for Twitchy’s diplomacy
You ain’t never met no Gobs like us!
We’re the best Goblins globally!
Medge pulls out two dogsclicers and starts slicing at the air
Can your lizard’s stab like this?
Can your lizards stab like that?
You think your lizards strong enough
To take down our really big cat?
Hey listen here!
Can your lizards go stabbity stab bonk bonk mojo rawr teeth BOOM!
No, I think they’ll run away in fear!
So don’t just sit there, trying to look all big and tough!
I’m here to make a fancy treaty with you!
We might have gotten rid of Vorka and taken her stuff
But she tried to eat us, it’s true!
Dread Pirates are fierce and scary!
So what do you think, I really wanna know!
You’ve got a lot of questions, no doubt,
Don’t just sit back and watch the show!
Queen Mother Gob, what’s it going to be?
Don’t treat this lightly, ‘cause you know,
Your lizard’s can’t stab as good, can’t stab as good
Your lizard’s can’t stab as good, can’t stab as good
Your lizard’s can’t stab as good as me!!!
No no no, your lizards can’t stab as good as meeee!”
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Mortimer sighs inwardly. Medge's diplomacy was just that fiery. And possibly a bit offensive, if you looked at it the wrong way. Mortimer tries to diffuse the explosive situation. He inclines his head towards Queen Janka and begins to speak.
"Please forgive our King,
He's a little rough on the edges
It might have something to do
With hopping off cliffs and ledges.
Your slight to his title was one,
That the King has taken offense
It's cos as pirates that we be
A title makes lots of sense.
We found your lizards snooping around
with Ronk and Twitchy's wedding in view.
We asked them to state their purposes,
and off in the bushes they hid anew.
Was it really that very hard, to tell us why
they were spying on us that day?
We gave them a chance to state their business
Yet they tried to run away, away.
We chased them down, tied them to the mast
Like pirates are wont to do.
The only thing that they could tell us,
was the mention of you.
Thus we have journeyed through the swamp
For answers are what we seek.
We would search for your fair domain,
Even if it takes us weeks.
King Medge might be speaking tough,
but he's not as bad as he looks.
Really all we really want is to know why,
You've set them on us to snoop.
Why can't we all get along together,
A single branch can easily break.
Yet tie them up in a bundle,
And they can withstand an earthquake."
Gurp
Medge
Mortimer
Ronk
Twitchy
Zeli
Hara the herald “I am sorry my gracious Queen, but their herald never mentioned a King Medge. Only a King Mortimer was introduced. Normally a group only has one king. Which of you is the vassel king?” Hara speaks quickly.
She wispers into the Queen’s small ear, “I think they are local Lick-toads” The Queen gives her a hard look and she looks very shamed
When Medge draws his weapons The War Chief Drazzat and the gaurds do also. Drazzat speaks forcefully “How dare you rude no name King!“ He looks ready to charge.
The the group MAY hear shifting behind them and may know roughly where it is coming from.
Gurp
Medge
Mortimer
Ronk
Twitchy
Zeli
The small simile on Janka’s face has not moved, but she holds up her hand to stop Drazzat.
“No Knocker, I did not give you that invisibility potion to harass our guests.”
The Group Hears Knocker’s voice behind them.
‘E like old bad chief,
W’o give no but grief,
‘is life was sure brief,
W’en nocked the thief.
Hee Hee Hee
Gurp
Medge
Mortimer
Ronk
Twitchy
Zeli
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At this the Queen speaks shortly in her lithe voice,
“I’ve quite enoug’ of t’at
T’iz not ‘ow you should speak to me
King Medge of the lil ‘at
You s’all keep civil now see
Question t’at of you Tribe
You w’o walk upon my lands
Dare upon the Queen to diatribe
You are far from fleeing sands
Only introduced waz King Mortimer
To w’oes name waz spoken
Take care now roamer
Less you want to see fury woken
For a t’ousand curses could be lane
So tempers you s’ould begin collection
For you pride you could be slain
For all your pain renew on resurrection
My faithful are loyal
My faithful are strong
My War Chief noble
But you are wrong
But back to your matter,” She bites out with distaste,
“My faithful were t’ere spying
Because My sister is mad like a ‘atter
The Long Bites s’e is guilty of frying
Vorka tiz my sister true
I could not wit’ my ‘ands or magic slay
But she is t’ief and liar too
For kin slaying curses to keep at bay
For t’is you did is good for us,” she says in a lighter tone
For ‘er dead could mean boon
And wit’ you I must discuss
If you return my warriors soon
To your young tribe we will treaty,
For w’en am I blessed.
I share to all parties completely
If in t’is you not protest?
I ‘ope we share this view
And t’roug’ words we do not rue
So a party long over do
And to my tribe you can début”
Fluffer, unable to maintain his hover, lands in front of Queen Janka.
Feeling all warm and fuzzy towards Janka, Twitchy starts to sing.
You can dance, you can jive
Having the time of your life
Dread Pirates new to the scene
Digging the Lizard queen!
It's late in the day and the lights are low
Looking for where all the lizards go
Where they play the right music, getting in the swing
Have you met our pirate king?
Only Medge could be that guy
Night is young and the sky is high
We'll give you back every last lizard spy
We're in the mood for a dance
Try it when you get the chance
You are the lizard queen
Young and green, shine so keen
Lizard queen, we ask for peace
Now that Vorka's soul been released!
You can dance, you can jive
Having the time of your life
Ooh see my Ronk, watch this scene
Digging the Lizard queen!
"I'll go get your warriors. We had a battle and they got scuffed up, but none of them died."
Ronk stands there silently watching the back and forth while looking a little confused.
Janka smiles a Ronk and a gentle voice “My S'adow Scales were t'ere to spy in Vorka to observe ‘er ‘abits. T'ey could not ‘ave known t'at you had killed ‘er. T’ey do not speak goblin, and am I correct in assuming none among you speak the langue of Dragons? T’ey probably did not tell you of w’at t’ey had come to do because t’ey did not wis’ to betray me. T’oug’ I easly could ‘ave killed ‘er I feared w’at t’at would do to my soul, because certain actions can truly doom you. If you return to me my warriors, T’en I will reward you for your labor.”
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"Queen Janka, we spoke to them,
Using a concoction devilishly clever.
For the effects of the potion,
Allowed its user to transcend any language barrier" Zeli protests in defense of her King. She missed out announcing Medge's name, which sort-of caused this mess. It was the least she could do.
'That is one dangerous lady. Do not get on her bad side.' Mortimer thinks to himself as she chides the party. His eyes show a certain wariness for a moment, then switches back to his usual charming self.
"Queen Janka, I understand,
You worry about your warrior's fates.
Well two on them we brought with us,
And are on your domain's outskirts.
The last one we left tied to the mast,
To ensure his mates good behaviour.
We will retrieve him with all haste,
But from you, I ask for a favour.
Free passage through Long Bites lands for us all,
For 2 days starting from now we seek.
For if by your sentries we are harassed,
How should we to your promise meet?"
Morrimer hopes nothing has happened to the lizard they tied to the mast. At least if Queen Janka agrees to the two days, there will be time to make other plans should anything have befallen the lizard.
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Gurp sits back on Squishy and lets the others do the talking, all the while taking mental notes on all these new faces. Okay, so we got Bigdumb and Vorka the Second and bunch of lizards, Gurp thinks to himself. They maybe not want kill us yet. When bad things go down, Ronk maybe bonk four lizards before he get killed. Bigdumb probably be one who end up kill most of us, unless New Vorka have mojo too...
Gurp keeps thinking about the ways the inevitable betrayal could get everyone killed and ways to avoid it. Every now and then he nods when Mort says something convincingly diplomatic.
Medge stops stabbing the air with her daggers and just freezes. A confused look spreads across her face. ”Mort Pet-Friend’ she says in what she thinks is a whisper but is really just as loud as her normal voice. ”Zeli bird didn’t say my name? Ohh...just titles. But, why they think we are same person? Because…..because…..they’ve seen goblin-cats before?!?” she gasps.
Queen, you have goblin cats? Medge really wants to see goblin-cats, sounds cool! We give you your lizard guys back, and then you show us goblin-cats and we are all good friends” Medge nods to herself, now thoroughly convinced that the matter’s all settled. She glances back at Gurp. ”Sorry, we get you other hearts to eat. Better ones!”
“King Medge you do not want to meet with the Gob-cats you lack restraint and they lack patience. To King Mortimer’s request. You ‘ave two of my S’adow Scales?. Ευλογίες σε σας, or Blessings upon you. Two days you may ‘ave, but I want to talk to my S’adow Scales. She says to Mortimer with a knowing look.
“I do ‘ave a question w’o struck first? I remember giving my warriors the order not to attack.”
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Ronk nods as the Queen of Lizards explaining what she is wanting in plainer terms and he grins toothily at the mention of a reward. Again his head rolls back and forth as everyone begins to talk again. Taking a few steps to Medge and grabbing her collar to pull her ear near his mouth. His joy at figuring something else hinders his ability to talk softer, Lizard thing called her a kitty so she is the Gob-cat.
Twitchy sighs.
It was our wedding
Ronk and I were heading
Towards marital bliss
Then to our surprised ears
Mort shouts, "Lizards with spears!"
Before Ronk and I could kiss
Yes, we attacked first
But don't think the worst
It really wasn't our fault!
We weren't to blame
When the lizards came
We thought it was an assault!
The lizards were hiding
We thought more were biding
They wouldn't answer our call
But hey... we kept 'em alive
And now we've arrived
We regret it, can we forget it all?
Mortimer has a hangdog expression when Queen Janka asks about who struck the first blow. He keeps quiet. That expression fades away and he brightens as he listens to Twitchy's speech. The Dread Pirate Goblins did have justification. The lizards were found on Dread Pirate Goblin lands!
"Queen Janka, on our lands they were found,
and we believed our realm in peril
We couldn't sit back and do nothing,
We had to deal with the situation in the way we knew."
Mortimer gawks at Queen Janka. Is there anything cat-ish about her?
"No Ronk I am not a gob-cat they live in trees"
"You have come here armed
And apon me your ‘King’ even drew those blades
But you are very much unharmed
You have much to learn if you wish to rule in these everglades
I know much about this swamp land
Where is Dread Pirate Goblin lands exactly?
I only sent my warrior’s to the the ruined ship in sand
half a day’s walk away not a trip to valley.
That ship is the border to the lick-toads, bird-cruncher, Underbelly tribe and Long Bite tribe.”
Holding out his arms and looking at them, Ronk goes everywhere armed. Ronk would be sad it he wasn't. Queen Janka's lizards interrupted Medges speech to make Twitchy his and Ronk Twitchy's. We are angry about that.
Shaking his head, Very angry. But you want them back and we get stuff for Vorka's death then it all works out as nice marriage present. Ship is that way. Ronk turns and points in a direction and then pauses, Or that ways. Bah it is the ways the Dread Pirates came and that is our place.
Pausing for a moment to think, Soon it will be more than a ship. But Lick-toads must be bonked first!
Crossing his arms and looking back at Queen Janka, Ronk would also like to see the Gob-Kitties. Are they furry Goblins or green Kitties with better ears?
“Zey are gobs wit’ furry bodies, long pre’ensile tails and ears of the big cat.
Zey speak ze language of ze Dragons zough, so you will not understand zem.
Zey are my good allies, so if you meet wit’ zem
Zey were all ze friends’ip is at
R-E-S-P-E-C-T!”
Eyes going wide, Nice and friendly Queen Janka teaches Ronk to talk like a Dragon so he can meet the Goblin Kitties?
"The Dread Pirate Goblins lands are the surroundings of the ship. King Medge can elaborate better then I. Queen Janka, thank you for your hospitality. We'd best get moving, we have some lizards to fetch."
Mortimer is angry with himself for not seeing it coming. He would need to have a good long talk with his party on what to do next. Damn those decitful scaled b@stards. Once he got his claws on them...he would..actually turn them over to Queen Janka. They had promised to bring the spies they had caught near their ship to her. If they did not know the spies were from another tribe, and the Underbelly spies had led them to her, claimimg that that was their tribe, it would be for them to answer to her, and their part of the bargain would be done.
Zeli has a confused expression on her face, "Urm..King Mortimer, the snooping lizards be from the Underbelly tribe? This be Longbites tribe, no?"
Mortimer REALLY wished that Zeli had kept her beak shut. "Yes, Zeli, I know. We'll get to that later." he whispers to her. He hopes Queen Janka didn't catch Zeli's remark and wants to get out of her earshot quickly.
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Medge shrugs ”She wants lizards, she can have lizards. They LIED, and while they should be stabbed many times, then we have to clean up mess. Instead, make them present to Gob Queen Lady. Good present, right?”
Medge looks curiously at the Queen ”You gonna eat their hearts and gain their strength? Small lizards but still good maybe. Now. About Dread Pirate land. The boat, that is MEDGE’s boat. Medge’s boat is Dread Pirate Goblin’s boat, but is also Medge’s boat. Anything we see from boat is ours too. Easy peasy right? Maybe Lick-toads is ours too. Don’t really want to keep, just burn down a few things, take some loot. Kick old chief in rear, ha! Don’t know bird cruncher, don’t like underbelly for LYING TO MEDGE. What you want us to do with them?”
The Queen suddenly looks enraged for the first time since you arrival. She narrows her eyes at Medge, and speaks in queitly yet threatning voice. “Silence. I have tolerated since your arrival the insults towards my warriors, belittledment of my brot’er, you have dawn your weapons in my presence in a t’reatening and ‘ostile act, and made boasts you cannot ‘ope back up. I just told you the s'ip borders my lands and you most certainly can see My Lands from your boat. Tell me are you really this socially inept or just stupid?”
“ ‘ow do you expect to make allies or friends in this swamp? I ‘ave ruled these lands for 12 years. ‘ow long do you want your reign to be? I demand your apology!”
Janka takes a deep breath and mutters, “Δεκάρα, Rude c’ildren, but remember you were once like zem with muc' more bravery zen common sense.” Janka looks to be calming down, but is still staring at Medge.
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”Medge draws herself up to her full height [b]"Medge. Is. Not. Stupid. Number the one, you know how far we can see from ship? Not far! Swamp is full of trees! Can’t see far in any direction here! Besides you say ship is on border not in border.”
”Number the two, Vorka your sister, you know she eats gobs and you let her live in boat and capture and eat Lick-toad gobs. Could tie up and keep somewhere safe but didn’t. And we not Lick-toads no more but we was, and Vorka could have eaten us, ate gobs we knew and family and stuff. That was threatening and hostile to us but we not getting all mad.”
”Number the three...this one Medge actually confused on. Lizards we capture say they from Underbelly tribe but you not Underbelly. But you say you sent lizards, but then why they lie to us about name of tribe but also send us this way? You fighting with Underbellies? Why Underbellies going to see Vorka? Ok, don’t know stuff, but only important because it leads to number the four“
Medge continues ”You say boat at place where all territories meet. So lots of it not your land anyways. Instead of Vorka who eats your lizards you have us who wants to be your friends. And, we already told you we going to toss out Lick-toads which gets you heaps more land anyways. Plus you know we don’t like Underbellies if they big fat boat touching liar pants, and that all works for you. We are awesome and useful and losing small bit of land in exchange for us puts you waaaaay ahead on your loot count. Medge knows about loot and economics and stuff!”
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Mortimer sighs again. This was getting complicated. And the cat was out of the bag. "Medge, I believe that there were 2 sets of spies at our boat. We caught the Underbelly spies. Unfortunately, we believed their claims that this was their tribe." Mortimer paws the ground he was standing on. "Queen Janka, I apologise. I have just realised we were deceived by the Underbelly lizards who claimed that this was their tribe. The lizards we caught were from Underbelly and not your Shadowscales. May we have your leave to hunt them down so they can answer to you for their deceit?"
He never knew lizard politics could get this messy.
“To your first point, we will discuss boundaries soon or sense miss communication will be common. ‘owever you are not very violent for zose of my race, maybe excitable but not violent. Zis pleases me.”
“To your second point, I did not let ‘er do anyt’ing. She was an adult, and we were never close. I am very aware the multitude of curses that can accrue if curtain conditions are met. I ‘ated my sister, but I was not going to kill her by my ‘and. I know she wanted to become undead; zat was the reason s’e was a cannibal. I tried locking ‘er up, and did for 3 years. S’e apparently ‘ad some friends, and zey ‘ave ‘elped ‘er escape in every attack my warriors ‘ave launched since making capture impossible. I did not know w’ere Vorka was ‘iding. Are you going to answer for all your old tribe’s wrongs now? Zat would hardly be sporting of me. I was talking about your actions recently, and how you are insulting my people, home’s ‘ospitality and then dominion. “
“I did not know s’e was hiding in the old s’ip wreck until you told me. I did send my S’adow Scales to find Vorka, so I could plan my next move. Zey ‘ave not returned. Ze Underbelly tribe and we are old rivals, but zeir old c’eiftain has been killed recently. Presently I do not know who is running zat tribe. Zey ‘ave been increasingly ‘ostile zoug’. “
“Your fourt’ point, you do realize in the same point you say I am getting more land while giving up land, right. I am not going to be on good terms with the Underbelly tribe it looks like. The licktoads have been raiding everyone too muc’ to make any friends. If ‘ave your promise you will not raid my land or people zen so be it.”
Back and forth Ronk's head rolls throughout the continued argument. Waving his hand in the air, Queen knows things and Dread Pirates know things. So if we are nice to Queens lizards and go bonk the lying Underbelly's Ronk can learn to talk like a Dragon and pet the Goblin Kittys?
“You certainly are odd. A goblin w’o openly asks ‘ow to read. ‘Mmm Yes very well Ronk I s’all teac’ you. Ronk is now my apprentice.”
Horror encoumpasses Ronks face and he takes a step back, Ronk wants to growl and roar like a dragon not read! That last word drips with disdain as is fitting for a normal Goblin.
"So you are just like ze rest. Ze runes are important. If you want to learn from zose are my terms. I do not do simple or easy. Zere is more to Draconian zen growling and roaring. It is the language of ze elements, power and of magic. You cannot truly understand without knowing it all." Janka looks with disappointment at Ronk.
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"But that's where all the treasure is. People write down their secrets in dairies, and those secrets can lead to treasure! Or great magics!" Mortimer protests.
"You may see an animal,
But don't underestimate me you see.
For I'm far smarter then I look,
I'm as educated as anybody.
I've read of the mighty beasts,
Of dragons big and small.
Of oozes of various shapes and colours
Why I know them all.
The planes that touch Golarion
Are of many different worlds.
Some are filled with devils a-plenty,
Others with water that swirls.
And the races of Golarion
Come in many different forms.
Some are plant-like, others are like robots
Some may even look wrong.
So judge not what your eyes see,
For a book is not judged from its cover.
Even if like a beast I be,
My knowledge could fill a tower."
Twitchy has stood at the sidelines, looking more and more uncomfortable at this talk of reading. Finally, she steps forward, looking very small and very scared. In fact, she's shaking.
It's only Mort's bravery in admitting that he's a reader that sustains her. She comes up to Mort and strokes his fur to calm herself.
Do you remember Scribbleface?
A nice gob who wrote stuff down
Chief Gutwad beat him, then burned his place
And chased that goblin out of town
We're not Licktoads we're Dread Pirates
Maybe we can have a wider view?
If this doesn't work I'll fly... Wait!
I'm married now, what do I do?
She hesitates, and gives an anguished look at Ronk.
What if you knew someone who could read?
Someone who loves you with all her heart?
Someone filled with plans and great deeds
Someone who's always done her part?
I should have told you but I was scared
Will I lose you now because I dared?
She turns to the Queen. "Queen Janka, I want to learn too. Teach me the language of the dragons, please?"
Janka looks at the Dread Pirates, “If you could seek zese Underbellies out zat would most appreciated. I would warn you zey a large tribe you will want to stay away from Great Stone Ridge unless you want a real fig’t. Lizard-folk usually camp in smaller groups w’en spying or ‘unting. If you see my S’adow Scales s’ow zem zis, and zey will let you pass.” Janka places a necklace of carved stones with a large flat carved bead around Medge’s neck. “Zis marks you as friend of our tribe. It is a what is called Amulet of Elemental Strife and will ‘elp protect you.”
She looks back to Ronk then over the rest of the Dread Pirates, “You will ‘ave to decide ze kind of tribe you want. You are a young tribe, and zese times will truly be your trial to see if you can make it. You choices will decide if you will be great, mediocre or non-existence. She looks to Ronk “All ze truly Great Peoples in ‘istory pus’ed beyond w’at zeir own called capable. It is just food for mind for zat is w’at ze words of ze peoples are.”
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Ronk freezes looking angry when Mort joins the conversation. Quickly turning around when the kitty is done so that he can yell at him. Mouth open and Mort looks so sincere and then there is Twitchy...Twitchy.
The world spins and right when Ronk thinks he will throw up everything goes really still except his brain, it feels like it is spinning still. A reader! My Twitchy is a reader! Mort is too! Why do they not know that it is evil. Reading steals the words right out of your head and when the words take them all your soul is gone!..
Of all thing for Ronk not to know
This is the absolute worst
Reading steals the very soul
This is a proven fact, all Goblin who read are cursed!
His red monster mask leaps off of his body and twirls around to look at him. A young voice dripping with arrogance rolls out.
Ronks why you being sp prissy
Twitchy is everything you are needing
You also love the kitty
Ronky, this mask might hide you
But we see right though
Ronkers we know how you feel
And you don't wanna care
Glaring at the mouthy mask Ronk yells,
No! it's bad and evil
Reader are dooomed!
With a Cheshire grin the mask leans in,
You whine, you moan
you believe Lick-toads
Snarling and shoving the mask out of the way to walk forward
[b]It Goblin truth
Not just of stupid Lick-toads
Throwing his arms up in the air Ronk stopping at the door to look outside at the lizard village,
This is a lesson Ronk never seems to learn
Everyone seems to wanna read dumb words
Ronk know better and should leave
Or we will lose our soul to the words
Arrgg!
Twisting back into the room yelling, as he rushes forward towards Twitchy. The Mask laughing as Ronk yells. Meeting Ronk before he makes it to Twitchy the Mask pushes him back,
Ronk keeps on whinin
About how this will cost a soul
Silly, why are you tryin
Greeny, alone you won't be whole
Be a Hero and male up
Glaring at the monster mask Ronk turns around and sits down. The mask tries to push him up.
Stop pouting and get up
Sitting there so, so, so alone
Crossing his arms and shaking his head vigorously
Nooo! Leave and go away
Ronk will not accept this
Moving so the Mask is again facing Ronk. Now both are glaring at each other
Shut up, just deal
You have a powerful tribe
Standing quickly and walking away from the Mask.
It will not work
Ronk will not stay!
Like lightening the Mask is back in Ronks face,
Listen to your hear and just be smart!
You want to stay
Standing his ground and trying to glare the mask into ash
Mask could be more wrong
Ronk hates readers
Smiling the mask step back looking pleased with its self
So Ronk is leaving the Dread Pirates?
Ronks eyes widen in horror as realization sets in
That hurts our heart
Ronk cannot leave
Drifting back to Ronk and floating over his head as it sings,
Ronk, stop and think
You even know a reader who lost their soul?
And with that last bit of advice the Monster Mask takes its place back on Ronks head leaving Ronk along with his thoughts. Staring at the ground looking rather forlorn,
Arg-arrggg
Ronk cannot believe it
but we will stay and read
Lost in thought Ronk misses what is said until Queen Janka moves forward and puts something on Medges neck. While the Queen is doing this Ronk quickly moves towards Mort and Twitchy. Reaching out to pat Morts nose and then stand next to Twitchy. It takes him a moment but he grabs Twitchy's hand when Queen Janka speaks directly to him.
Janka smiles at Twitchy "Yes, Twitc'y I s'all. Zat is ze reason I came back to my 'ome after so long to teac' and sc'ool. Sadly no Gob listened only ze LongBites w'ic' is w'y zey my peoples."
"How are we to identify the Shadowscales, if we run into them? Also, do you want us to find the Shadowscales that you set watching on our ship as they have not reported back to you?"