I have an abyssal sorcerer that I am writing up for a play by post game, and to be honest I am looking for the fairly absurd. I've been accused in the past of playing characters that are way too crunchy, so I'm going off the rails.
First, the idea is for an abyssal sorcerer that is all about having underlings. She is chaotic good, but pretends and acts like she's evil and antagonizes the party paladin constantly, mostly to convince herself she's evil and not a failure in the eyes of her demonic accountant father.
Please help me in these very broad categories.
1. Coming up with small evils that aren't really evil. They can even be mean or painful, just not truly evil.
In this campaign setting, all player character MUST be good. So I can't do real evil. Instead, I do things like..
A.Steal snacks, rations, food, etc.
B.Try to convince merchants to give me more copper pieces in change than strictly necessary.
C. Make my summoned creatures wear ridiculous outfits.
D. Researching a papercut spell that inflicts a papercut on the party wizard when he scribes scrolls.
Etc etc.
2. Fun with Summons. I am really trying to find a way to do things like summoning fiendish dolphins that can be thrown, and then explode. I'd really like to find a way to use intelligent, humanoid demons (or not humanoid ones) as mounts. Level 15 (or 11 with an item).
Is there any mechanic that you know that allows me to call the same summoned creature, equipped with items I buy? Maybe I could put a demon in a white wedding dress, or something silly, and make it fight with a bouquet.
3. Spell choices that emphasize this characters desire to inherit an underworld legion from her father. Currently she's only level 4, and I've even wasted a slot on Unseen Servant, so she has someone to boss around all the time. Is there a faster or better version of servant that has a long duration?
I'd love to have her lounge on floating discs while being charioteered about by summoned spirits.
Please don't let me down forums!
EDIT: Choices are limited to like, 99% CRB. We get ONE, spell or item from the APG, and that's it. My item will likely be sorc robes to speed up bloodline progression.
Don't treat dead enemies with respect. Use them as props for your soliloquy, or suggest that the Big Stupid Fighter makes a pyramid of skulls, or make a necklace of fangs and claws from party kills. Give your fellow party members titles which sound vaguely evil or demonic and use those to refer to them. Using references to media the others know helps - I once gave a wizard a name ending in 'the White' and everyone assumed he was evil immediately.
Summons to trigger traps is an old ploy. A lot of what you're asking for is simply not core in PF though.
Enchantment spells are your basic bossing-people-around spells. Best used on enemies obviously.
I love the idea of giving them terrible sounding nicknames. Except the Paladin of course, he gets a nerdy one.
Our cleric worships a god in our campaign setting that takes in the souls of the dead and gives them out to newborns. Nicest person ever.
Shes is now Cleric, the Souldrinker!
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First, the idea is for an abyssal sorcerer that is all about having underlings. She is chaotic good, but pretends and acts like she's evil and antagonizes the party paladin constantly, mostly to convince herself she's evil and not a failure in the eyes of her demonic accountant father.
Pretend your unseen servant is a real summoned spirit, perhaps even the soul of a parent that you've bound to torment for eternity. Taunt it while ordering it about, "Go cross float across that pool of lava and get the key for me, and think about all those times you sent me to my room and how that made me feel!"
Use custom bestow curse on a quasi-adversary (someone who isn't enough of a foe to be XP, just one of those annoying NPCs who serve as obstacles to deal with) to give them the habit of compulsively counting spilled items, or of sorting coins or gems by type, or double-checking the math on any pages with equations they find (losing actions when those particular situations come up), all things kind of on-theme for someone with a 'demonic accountant father.' There are tons of other options, limited only by your creativity, and they can be tailored to suit the individual or situation (such as being sickened by the scent of anything alcoholic for a worshipper of Cayden Cailean, or being shaken by the sight of dead bodies for a mortician).
Use the Perform skill to create an annoying ditty that gets stuck in the heads of listeners. "This is the song that never ends, it just goes on and on my friend..." Use ghost sound to play it at random times, but always arrange it to happen when the intended audience doesn't know you are around / awake / can't see you casting. Claim to have never heard the strange music they are complaining about, if asked, and give no indication that you have high ranks in the Perform skill. (If there's a spell like the old magic mouth spell available to you, that's another great way to play pranks. Mysterious messages that 'go off' on command, in various creepy voices!)
Prestidigitation can change colors and flavors and temperatures. Warm the milk. Chill the tea. Make the bacon taste like mud. Make the wine taste like blood. Make the paladin's heraldic tabard colors change to periwinkle and flourescent poison green, and the majestic mane and tail on their mighty steed a bright orange. Some sort of sleight of hand / stealth rolls might be crucial to casting this spell without being seen, or even a good Bluff roll to create a diversion to give you the opportunity to 'spike' the bacon rations, or tea leaves, but you can get a ton of pranks out of this one simple cantrip.
Hahaha!
Using Presti to make someones food taste bad is low key evil and perfect for this character.
Her Bluff is through the roof, so I could probably pull off pretending not to hear evil songs too it.
Coloring peoples gear is pretty amazing as well, and could be a lot of fun on the edgelord ranger in the group.
Thanks for fun with prestidigitation!