Deep 6 FaWtL

[John Napier 698]

Reading body language on an instinctual level?

[gran rey de los mono]

That's part of it. Also, if they're nekkid. That tells you something right there.

[captain yesterday]

That's what she said!!

[captain yesterday]

Captain Yesterday's board game house rules (Clue Edition).

1) The game ends when people start throwing things at each other.

[gran rey de los mono]

That's when the game is just starting to get good.

[gran rey de los mono]

Life is all about perspective. For instance, the sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the kitchen.

[gran rey de los mono]

It's weird. Whenever I walk into a spider's web, I destroy it's home and cause it to lose it's dinner, and yet I feel like I'm the victim.

[gran rey de los mono]

Sometimes I look at the birds in the sky and think to myself, "If I could fly, who would I shit on?"

[gran rey de los mono]

Dolphins are very smart. After only a few weeks in captivity they can train people to stand on the side of the tank and feed them fish.

[gran rey de los mono]

My wife wanted a puppy. I didn't want a puppy. So we compromised and got a puppy.

[gran rey de los mono]

I need to start paying closer attention to things. For instance, today I found out that my wife and I have different names for the cat.

[gran rey de los mono]

Dogs have lots of friends because they wag their tails instead of their tongues.

[gran rey de los mono]

Do turtles think that frogs are homeless?

[gran rey de los mono]

It seems that a duck's opinion of me depends mainly on whether or not I have a piece of bread.

[Adequate Duck]

Quack.

*tappy tappy tap*

[Less-Than-Adequate Duck]

Spuaq!

*accidentally bites own wing*

[gran rey de los mono]

What do you call a magic dog? A labracadabrador.

[gran rey de los mono]

I took my dog to a bonfire. I thought he would love it, but he just sat there staring blankly at the fire. Then it hit me. He loves sticks. To him, we were burning a giant pile of his favorite toys.

[gran rey de los mono]

What animal can jump higher than a skyscraper? All of them. Skyscrapers can't jump.

[gran rey de los mono]

The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.

[gran rey de los mono]

Why didn't Shredder just flip the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on their backs and then laugh as they struggled to right themselves?

[gran rey de los mono]

What do you call a magic owl? Hoodini.

[gran rey de los mono]

What is a zebra? 26 sizes larger than an A-bra.

[gran rey de los mono]

My cat constantly looks at me like I just asked her to give me a ride to the airport.

[gran rey de los mono]

A cat by any other name is still a stinky furball that barfs on the sofa.

[gran rey de los mono]

Why are pigs bad party guests? They're a bunch of boars.

[gran rey de los mono]

Is a sad frog unhoppy?

[Nina, Kileanna's Familiar]

*Thinks that Hoodini would have been a better name, and gives Kileanna a contemptuous look*

[gran rey de los mono]

Judging by the size of these chicken fingers, I would estimate the chicken was between 10' and 11' tall.

[gran rey de los mono]

You can never lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn't come back, what you've lost is just a pigeon.

[gran rey de los mono]

I love waking up to the sound of birds arguing with their spouses.

[gran rey de los mono]

What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A pit bull.

[gran rey de los mono]

Nina, Kileanna's Familiar wrote:

*Thinks that Hoodini would have been a better name, and gives Kileanna a contemptuous look*

Well, clearly "Nina" is short for "Hoodini".

[gran rey de los mono]

I love defenseless animals. Especially with a nice gravy.

[gran rey de los mono]

If cats could text you back, they wouldn't.

[gran rey de los mono]

I want to climb a tree, but I'm also really lazy. So I'm just going to put a lawn chair over this acorn, sit down, and wait.

[Rosita the Riveter]

Is 134 hours logged in Dragon Age: Inquisition a lot? I thought my record was Skyrim with 104 (And I STILL need to sit down and play the Dragonborn DLC and finish the Civil War questlines), but Origin says I've logged 134 on Inquisition, and I still haven't played Descent, Jaws of Haakon, or Trespasser (which I just got the GOTY edition cheap on their sale to do now).

To round out my top 5 on Steam, Assassin's Creed IV follows Skyrim at 70 hours (and there, too, I have unfinished DLC campaigns), L.A. Noire is at 53 hours, Civ V is at 45, and Valkyria Chronicles is at 45.

[Vidmaster7]

So much to catch up on.

[captain yesterday]

It sure is nice having my eyebrow healed (other than my villain scar that is, which isn't as noticeable as one would want a villainous scar).

I guess that's probably a good thing. I guess.

[captain yesterday]

Watched the season finale of Fargo. Wow! Good stuff!!

[gran rey de los mono]

captain yesterday wrote:

It sure is nice having my eyebrow healed (other than my villain scar that is, which isn't as noticeable as one would want a villainous scar).

I guess that's probably a good thing. I guess.

Borrow some makeup from The General and emphasize the scar.

[Cap'n Zoolander, FaWtLy Fashion]

No, makeup works for some people. I am not one of those people.

[captain yesterday]

I'll just have to find ways to bring it up.

"Little Tyler made the honor roll!"

"Really! That reminds me of when I got this scar..."

[Vidmaster7]

Where you in a bar fight with some highschoolers?

[captain yesterday]

No, I stabbed myself with a car door, right above my eye.

[Vidmaster7]

Yeah I would go with the highschooler story...

[captain yesterday]

I can take a bunch of high schoolers.

[Vidmaster7]

But apparently not without a slight eye wound *wink wink*

[captain yesterday]

I primarily work in construction, how is getting an eye injury from stupid idiot high schoolers going to be a better story for me then the truth.

[Vidmaster7]

Take it so seriously. the better question is what is a bunch of high schoolers doing in a bar?