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I had depression for 6 years. I was on a medication called Effexor. It did it's job which was to even me out. It evened me out to the point I felt nothing at all, I went completely robotic, went to my dads funeral didn't shed a tear throughout the whole grieving process while on Effexor. My friends did get kinda freaked out, but it's effects lead me to the my field of study (Psychopharmacology). The problem is SSRI's (Anti-depressants) have a variety of undesirable side effects. Some of what you descried as well as severe sleepiness (had a friend on Celexa sleeping 14 hours a day), stunted emotions, and maybe a lack of effect. My suggestion is to see your doctor or registered psychologist to see if they can switch you too a new medication, sometimes thats all it takes.
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I've had some major problems in the past, so I'll give you my opinions on the subject:
For people who’ve used Citalopram, did it seem to wear off while you were taking it, and if so, how did you resolve the situation- ie. did you need a stronger dose, or different medication?
I've never used it. However, if you go to see a doctor, and they try to proscribe lithium, throw it out. Stuff turns you into a f@#@ing zombie. Also, unless you're unable to function otherwise, do not take anything with a dosage of over 30 milligrams.
If you’ve had depression for a long time, have some “friends” blanked you out (and how did you deal with that)? Have you not contacted some old friends/acquaintances because you didn’t want to be the “pain-in-the-butt” friend or other reasons? If you have stopped contacting some old friends, have you got in touch with them again, even if you’ve not seen or spoken with them for say 15 years?
I don't have a whole lot of friends, so this may not be true for you, but my friends stuck by me through all of my pits and valleys. In your case, if they're really your friends, they will too.
If you had depression at uni and it ruined your grade, have you got a good job and how did you get it? I heard that in the UK, 60% of non-public companies refuse to employ people who’ve suffered depression, which is disgusting.
Never gone to college (yet), so I don't know. However, my two worst periods were both in high school, and I basically tanked. Missed school, grades dropped, the whole lot. I don't know how I made it out of that one.
For those who’ve had counselling, was it useful (and how)?
For this one, I will say yes, with one caveat:
GO TO A PSYCHOLOGIST, NOT A PSYCHIATRIST.I have gone to see many psychiatrists over the years, and for the most part, they are money-grubbing morons who have no f&~*ing clue what's wrong with themselves, much less their patients. However, I have seen at least as many sane, calm, and helpful psychiatrists and counselors as I have insane psychologists. If I were you (which, obviously, I'm not, but bear with me), I would try to get some sort of counseling. The thing that has helped me most is simply being able to talk to someone who knows what you're going through, and can talk you through your problems.
If you’ve recovered, how did you begin expanding your circle of friends? I suppose that if you’ve had a big circle of friends and/or a wife, I imagine it’s relatively easy, but if you have only a small circle of friends to begin with, how did you proceed?
No bones made about it, it's really f!!@ing hard. Me? I got a job, and started playing music. I met people through work, and through the tiny Ticonderoga, New York music scene. I still don't have a lot of friends, but it's enough.
In short, how did you get your life back together?
This is going to sound really stupid, but after my last (hopefully my final) suicide attempt, I tried to really fixate on something. A lot of people try religion, but I'm not the religious type, so instead of finding God, I found Henry Rollins. I got really heavy into music, started working out, and started trying to keep my body clean: no s&@$ty food, no drugs, no alcohol, no smoking. So far, through paying attention to Rollins and common sense, I've had no episodes for over a year.
My advice to you: keep yourself moving, keep your blood clean, your body lean, and your mind sharp.
- David Mallon
(If you want it, my e-mail address is in my profile.)
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Most of the time someone suffers from depression there is an underlying cause. Whether it being personality disorder, suppressed memory or trauma, or something else. But I'm no counselor, I understand a lot about drug interactions but little to do with the couseling aspect of Psychology. I would suggest some one on one counseling could do well if you have a severe disconnect with friends. Isolation usually leads down bad roads. I know I tried it and ended up in the hospital with slashed wrists, and a really pissed off friend.
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Yes, you may ask. It is something I'm going through, hate it, and want to finally get it out of the way. I've been taking Citalopram since February of this year (although the pills seem to have worn off), and am due to start counselling in June.
Sorry that was a pretty stupid question. Mr. Shiny and Jeremy both have some pretty good advice, particularly about friends, it doesn't matter how many friends you have, hell I can count mine on one hand.
A couple of questions though, are you married? any kids? how long have you been going thru this? Medication often loses effectivness over time as the body builds up a resistance, so thats not unusual. The counselling is probably a good thing I would imagine. I have "anger issues" myself so I can't offer you as much help as I would like.
A lot of what Mr. Shiny said rings true to me. I totally agree with the good food. But, I'm a foody. A waist is a terrible thing to mind. Alcohol is a depressant and will mess with a lot of meds. Studies have shown that exercise and a balanced diet can be very effective means to manage mild depression.
I think it's important to realize that you are not alone. 1:4 persons will in their lifetime be diagnosed with a mental health problem. Coming out to talk is a really great, brave thing. You will get better in time. Learn *patience*. Mental illness takes time to recover from. And please stay on your meds. Talk to your doctor if the side effects are unbearable, but don't quit cold turkey. You put yourself at risk doing so. In time you will find a balance. Many professionals state that many mental illnesses are diseases like diabetes, you will never be cured, but you will be able to manage. Don't be afraid that you will lose who you are--on proper medications that work with you, you won't. You will find yourself more on the level, relaxed and able to deal with life in general.
I didn't do well my first year at university either. It's a big change. You may find you like college better and you can probably transfer a lot of courses over to uni later. Talk to the campus medical people about your condition. They may be able to help you talk to the advisers to have your course load cut without losing funding.
If it turns out that your courses are causing you grief, maybe you need to do some introspection. Maybe your major isn't right for you. I'm definately not a marketing manager. I'm really more of a tradesperson. University is hard. The professors don't care about how well you do. You really are responsible for your own learning there. College is a bit more like high school. Smaller classes with the same people that become friends and collegues. And everyone cares more, the instructors, the advisors--they seem to want you to succeed. Ask friends about their college experiences to pick a place that's right for you.
As for problems with a job, don't tell 'em. Your medical info is none of their business. If it doesn't effect your ability to do your job, keep it to yourself. When you are properly adjusted to your meds, you should be able to work. If you have problems getting a job in your field, volunteer. If you truly want a job in that field, being an intern for a while won't be so bad. The only thing about volunteering/ intership is that it doesn't usually pay. You may find it beneficial to take out a personal loan and treat your intership as a form of school tailored to you.
Councilling is extremely useful to me. Talking to someone who is not the source of your problems feels really good. Group councilling can help you overcome shyness and you might find some friends. Councilling helps you modify problematic behaviours and deal with life better. Do not underestimate its effectiveness.
When you are finished your talk-therapy and your meds are working at the right balance, things will come together for you. It'll be easier to socialize and find friends. But be patient. It takes a while.
Patience is not my virtue either, but it really is the key to success and healing. A really good perspective is found in "Puppy Chow is Better than Prozac" by Bruce Goldstein, who suffers from bipolar disorder. This book really shows that recovery is possible, patience with yourself and cooperation with your healthcare providers is essential and that you are not alone. Check it out.
You can write me too. Email is in the profile.
-Nicole
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Ok I checked up on my notes on Cilopram for you man. I know by it's more popular name of "Celexa". It's used to treat Depression, OCD (Obsessive Compulsive disorder), PTSD (Post- Tramautic Stress disorder) and Anxiety disorder. Celexa is partially an SSRI (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor) which is what you need. Celexa's whole purpose is to "Calm" or even you out. If you begin to feel emotionless or non- responsive it's not surprising. Unfortunately Celexa (while good and helpful) has been the new cure all drug pushed by every family doctor all over the country. It's what we call an entry level test drug, we put you on it to see how well it works on you (which it usually does a fair job of) before we switch you too something that may be more suited to your needs. Bottom line if it isn't doing the trick for you please please see your doctor or even better a psychologist. They are equiped to help you.
I have taken 50mg of trazodone (main side effect: sleepiness, one of my main symptoms of depression: chronic insomnia. obvious match.) every* day for the last ten years.
*Excluding those times when I thought I could just stop taking my medication and nobody would notice. Never made it longer than a week. They notice. Also excluding the months when I was pregnant. I was too busy with morning(ha!) sickness to notice depression at that time.
As long as I take my medication I am a perfectly normal* person with a perfectly normal range of emotions. When I don't... I just stop functioning. I can't sleep, I walk around like a zombie, my emotions go completely numb, and I lose memory. This has caused a lot of tension in my marriage. My friends all met me after I was on medication and pretty well functional, so there aren't the long term issues there. But there has been a lot of not-fun things to have to work through between my husband and I. It took him a long, long time to come to accept that depression is a disease, that it is not my fault, and that I can't just will myself better. And after I started to get better, I had a lot of anger issues that nobody had stepped in earlier. Before I got really bad I tried to get help several times and was very unfortunate in choice of doctors apparently. But after losing an entire year, that I just have no memory of at all, I was pissed. We're still working on the relationship fallout, to be honest.
*any use of the word normal to describe me is likely to be challenged by those who know me well, usually replaced with terms like interesting and eccentric
I've heard the whole 'take it one day at a time' nonsense a lot. I just can't do that. More like one hour at a time. It takes a lot of effort over a long period of time to put your life back together. But it does happen. Maybe not just the way it was before, but sometimes even better. And there are a lot more people out there who really do understand and won't judge you for it than I ever thought possible when I started this process of trying to get my life back.
I'm sure I have a mild form of genetically-derived depression. My mother has pretty severe depression, as did her father (he was an alcoholic, and studies have shown a relationship). My sisters both have depression (one is borderline bi-polar). It wasn't until I was over 30 that I decided to do something about it--my wife threatening to divorce me actually made me do something about it.
I tried a variety of anti-depressants (Zoloft, Welbutrin and Effexor) and the side-effects were worse than the depression. Zoloft turned my emotional state to that of the Hulk, and I basically started looking for fights. Welbutrin and Effexor made me sleepy all the time. While I was on Effexor, I was sleeping 14 hours a day, which didn't do me a lot of good at my job. The person prescribing it increased my dosage, which not only didn't fix the sleeping problem, but also introduced hives. When I went back to the doctor, she told me there was no way Effexor could produce hives. That's when I went to a new doctor.
I'm now taking Deplin, which is folate (same as folic acid, but doesn't have to be processed by the body), and the sleep issues have gone away. The depression is still there, but manageable.
My wife helps bring me out of the times I've become withdrawn, although she still struggles with understanding how depression affects me. Having someone who at least recognizes that you are withdrawn and can help you get out of that helps a lot, whether it be a friend, partner, family member, whatever.
I would definitely recommend counseling. I've had some bad therapists, but the good ones will work with you to give you strategies to cope with depression. Don't be afraid to leave a therapist if it isn't working for you. That's a big mistake I made.
I'm sorry that you are going through this, and I hope you do find something that works for you.
For people who’ve used Citalopram, did it seem to wear off while you were taking it, and if so, how did you resolve the situation- ie. did you need a stronger dose, or different medication?
- It did seem to wear off and my GP advised me to get counselling.
(side note: do not stop taking Citalopram or any SSRI meds without talking to your doctor first, withdrawal is a b#¤&:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SSRI_discontinuation_syndrome
If you’ve had depression for a long time, have some “friends” blanked you out (and how did you deal with that)? Have you not contacted some old friends/acquaintances because you didn’t want to be the “pain-in-the-butt” friend or other reasons? If you have stopped contacting some old friends, have you got in touch with them again, even if you’ve not seen or spoken with them for say 15 years?
-None of my friends "blanked " me out, I withdrew from them. That was a bad idea. The reasons I had(pain-in-the...,to much hassle) were my depression talking.
-I lost contact with some of my old friends ,but what have you got to loose?
If you had depression at uni and it ruined your grade, have you got a good job and how did you get it?
-I was depressed at uni and it did ruin my grade. I did not get a good job. I did manage to get a job and keep it, while getting treated for depression. (most employers look at attendence ,YMMW)
For those who’ve had counselling, was it useful (and how)?
-Cognitive behavioral therapy helped me, but find something that feels right for you!
In short, how did you get your life back together?
-Trying to keep in contact with friends, meds, counselling and moderate exercise(I borrowed a dog for 45 minutes every day).
I didn't get the life I imagined, but its still my life to live:)
Good luck with yours!
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One thing that has been touched on a couple times in this thread, but deserves a serious focus is once you are on a medicinal regimen that is working for you, do not stop taking the meds without talking to your doctor first. Four years ago I lost a friend who suffered from pretty severe depression. He got on a drug regimen that worked well for him and, almost a year later, decided that the meds had done their job and he stopped taking them without letting anyone know.
Just remember that when you get onto meds that work for you, don't make any changes without consulting your doctor. When you do make changes, pay close attention to how they affect you and let your doctor know.
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I have taken 50mg of trazodone (main side effect: sleepiness, one of my main symptoms of depression: chronic insomnia. obvious match.) every* day for the last ten years.
*Excluding those times when I thought I could just stop taking my medication and nobody would notice. Never made it longer than a week. They notice. Also excluding the months when I was pregnant. I was too busy with morning(ha!) sickness to notice depression at that time.
As far as medications go, try to do without. I was put on a moderate dose of Lexapro when I was twelve, and now, ten years later, I have a chemical dependency. The drug itself does about dick s@&!, but If I go off my meds, I get crushing migraines and puke my guts out every few hours, starting after about two days. I will never forgive my parents for sticking me on drugs right off the bat, rather than finding a good counselor. F**# drugs. Being medicated is half the reason I'm straight edge.
As for dealing with your friends, here's an awesome example of how NOT to do it.
I have taken 50mg of trazodone (main side effect: sleepiness, one of my main symptoms of depression: chronic insomnia. obvious match.) every* day for the last ten years.
*Excluding those times when I thought I could just stop taking my medication and nobody would notice. Never made it longer than a week. They notice. Also excluding the months when I was pregnant. I was too busy with morning(ha!) sickness to notice depression at that time.As far as medications go, try to do without. I was put on a moderate dose of Lexapro when I was twelve, and now, ten years later, I have a chemical dependency. The drug itself does about dick s*!%, but If I go off my meds, I get crushing migraines and puke my guts out every few hours, starting after about two days. I will never forgive my parents for sticking me on drugs right off the bat, rather than finding a good counselor. f#&% drugs. Being medicated is half the reason I'm straight edge.
As for dealing with your friends, here's an awesome example of how NOT to do it.
Yeah, putting a kid on antidepressants is not cool. I'm really sorry you've had to go through that. On the other hand, sometimes the pills are really necessary. I was twenty two, had dropped out of university - just walked away from an amazing scholarship, and had blacked out for an entire year of my life, before I started taking the antidepressants. I was lucky during my college years to have some really good friends willing to spend lots of time talking with me and making sure not to leave me alone when I started going on about how much easier it would be to just end it all. I wish I had started the medication sooner. There are a lot of things that would have worked out differently. It's not something to do lightly, but for those of us who need it, it means the difference between having a life or not. It can be a really fine line to walk finding out what's right for you.
Whoops. I just realized I hadn't really wrote anything in the profile. I fixed that.
Congrats on your driver's licence. Ir sounds like a highlight for you.
I'm trying to find a decent job too. We have recession in Canada, but I don't think things are as bad here as in some states. I enjoy the animals at work, but am looking for something better. After 2 years of college, I determined conclusively that I cannot work in an office. But I'm loathe to go to school again, so I'm working on personal development this year. I really like animal medicine, so part of my development will be learning to work better with people and stress managment, so maybe I can pursue a career in people health and get the job in oilfield safety I was conditionally offered last year. For me, managing stress and depressive episodes is key to my success in meeting these goals. So I have a reason to keep going to therapy, even when it really feels like a step backwards.
I made some simple goals and have been working towards them. I feel so good when I can keep my goals. I decided I would run every second night and do sit-ups/push-ups the other nights. I've been quite successful, but I didn't tell myself I'd run a km, I just said I'd run. I hate running, so I bring the dog as a distraction. I also absolutely hate sit-ups--they make my food baby cry. So I do those during the commericals. No wonder I like animals, I'm so animalistically simple. I'm food-motivated too.
But I'm degressing. My point is little goals, easy successes, happy you. Try breaking your goal of "I want a good career" into smaller bits. Find out what kind of work you like, what hours you can work (shift-work is very demanding, might not be for you) Talk to people in your desired field of work. Research. Volunteer. Try to meet one of these goals every week. Check out alis.gov.ab.ca for a really good career website put up by the Alberta Gov't. It's not just for Canucks.
GreatKhanArtist makes a great point about the little goals. It is essential to keep those little things that help you keep going. For me it's Chi Gong and art. Those are the things that help keep my sane when it seems like everything else is falling apart. There are plenty of other things that I enjoy, but for whatever reason those are the things that help me step into a more serene balanced headspace. Finding what those little things are that help you keep going is an important part of recovery.
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For people who’ve used Citalopram, did it seem to wear off while you were taking it, and if so, how did you resolve the situation- ie. did you need a stronger dose, or different medication?- It did seem to wear off and my GP advised me to get counselling.
(side note: do not stop taking Citalopram or any SSRI meds without talking to your doctor first, withdrawal is a b#¤&:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SSRI_discontinuation_syndromeIf you’ve had depression for a long time, have some “friends” blanked you out (and how did you deal with that)? Have you not contacted some old friends/acquaintances because you didn’t want to be the “pain-in-the-butt” friend or other reasons? If you have stopped contacting some old friends, have you got in touch with them again, even if you’ve not seen or spoken with them for say 15 years?
-None of my friends "blanked " me out, I withdrew from them. That was a bad idea. The reasons I had(pain-in-the...,to much hassle) were my depression talking.
-I lost contact with some of my old friends ,but what have you got to loose?
If you had depression at uni and it ruined your grade, have you got a good job and how did you get it?
-I was depressed at uni and it did ruin my grade. I did not get a good job. I did manage to get a job and keep it, while getting treated for depression. (most employers look at attendence ,YMMW)
For those who’ve had counselling, was it useful (and how)?
-Cognitive behavioral therapy helped me, but find something that feels right for you!In short, how did you get your life back together?
-Trying to keep in contact with friends, meds, counselling and moderate exercise(I borrowed a dog for 45 minutes every day).
I didn't get the life I imagined, but its still my life to live:)
Good luck with yours!
If your medication is losing effect go see your doctor either dosage isn't high enough or a new medication is required. It's very important to consult with a medical professional regularly about any longstanding medical condition.
Thanks:)
Low-grade depression a few years back. Can't even remember the meds the psychologist put me on. Gave 'em up after about 12 weeks. But my case was LOW-GRADE and temporary, and sympathies to those that struggle with the real thing.
Cannot recommend enough the psychologist/therapist route. It's like talking to a neutral party. You can say things that you aren't comfortable saying to anyone close, and the reactions you get are usually constructive. It's like letting the pressure out a little bit at a time. And it teaches you to organize the things in your mind, or at least recognize them for what they are.
Once you get happy with yourself (or life itself) again (congrats, it sounds like you're making progress) people will respond to you differently. Maybe some old friends, maybe some new.
Good luck.
No need to apologize for not being into RPGs. They are not for everyone. Just by the by, escapism is not the only reason to play. However, I do relate.
Chicks can be attracted to guys with mental health issues (and vice versa). I think both genders are turned off by people with low self esteem. That is the bad news. The good news is you do not have to have low self esteem. Obviously, with a medical condition, it is going to be a difficult road. You can do it. I may not suffer from depression, but I do have a low self esteem. If I can make progress, anyone can.
To quote the great bard Tupac Amaru Shakur again, "Ya got to keep your head up."
It will not happen over night, but do not get discouraged. Remember, it took you this long to develop your current mind set. It is going to take some time to change it.
Here are some of my suggestions for managing/dealing with depression.
1. Exercise.
Regular exercise has to be one of the absolute keys to banishing depression. Keep the weight off and radically change your eating (and drinking) habits. And then exercise some more.
2. Invest part of your life in others and not just for show.
3. Do good. Be good. Keep your conscience clean. A clean conscience is vital for dealing with depression.
4. Make your bed everyday. Some may read this and laugh but part of controlling depression is making sure you don't break off normal disciplines simply because you're feeling depressed. When you break those disciplines you feel guilty... which leads to further depression... which leads to a breaking of disciplines etc.... So, really, make your bed everyday. Ideally, try and keep your bedroom really tidy.
5. Exercise some more. Endorphins are better than drugs.
Just noticed this thread.
I suffer/ed from depression due to having Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
I was in a constant state of being freaked out that I might lose control of my self.
I sought help admitted my self and got my self sorted out. I found a good psychologist and psychiatrist working in combination helped me to no end.
I went from a withdrawn employee just doing what was needed not to get fired to being poached by another department and getting a pay rise of considerable proportions.
My family life is also so much better.
I am still on medication although I have under supervision of my GP been reducing the medication. I hope to be free of it by the end of the year. If it doesn't work and I have to go back on I will be a little sad about it but I would rather be stable.
Good luck and you are not alone.
worked for me; took almost 2 years and nearly a year of taking one drug just for a little help; but am back on track now. Sometimes life throws you things faster than you can deal; mom died; wife left; ect. all in short time. Is nice that there are people that can help you sort out feelings that are unfamiliar and help you set goals and achieve them. The drug I took was awesome, just improved my feeling of well being and outlook a bit so I could get back to how I used to be; my normal happy self out doing things, instead of just sitting doing nothing for hours on end.
Not all counciling professionals are equal; find one you like who specialized in your difficulty.
As for dealing with your friends, here's an awesome example of how NOT to do it.
Hehe. Published.
Shiny's you're made of good stuff, dude.
I think the problem is not friends blanking you out, it's more you going into isolation. Maybe because you don't want to be a burden, or just because you can't be bothered (loss of motivation is a big factor in depression, after all)
If you had depression at uni and it ruined your grade, have you got a good job and how did you get it? I heard that in the UK, 60% of non-public companies refuse to employ people who’ve suffered depression, which is disgusting.
That really is disgusting.
For those who’ve had counselling, was it useful (and how)?
For the record, I apparently have/had only light depression (though it certainly felt differently at times).
I've had counselling, and it helped - but not necessarily because I was told how to deal with the problems I have. The biggest help I got out of all that was to realise just what my problems are.
It's amazing what you can hide from yourself (but then again, you know yourself really well and you're helping, so maybe it's not that amazing after all). Talk about proverbial scales falling from my eyes!
Once I know what my problems were, I was able to fix most of them. There's one matter left, and I don't think I can ever change that (maybe it's fatalism talking, maybe it's Malkavian insight), but with the other matters out of the way, it's not nearly as bad any more, and while I might not be the Happiest Man on Earth, I think I really am content, and even something like happy at times.
If you’ve recovered, how did you begin expanding your circle of friends? I suppose that if you’ve had a big circle of friends and/or a wife, I imagine it’s relatively easy, but if you have only a small circle of friends to begin with, how did you proceed?
What is this friends you speak of?
Seriously, if you find out about that one, let me know.
I guess I'll have to do something about this one of these days, but in regards to friendship, I do have the guys I play PF with, which I consider friends. It's nothing new exactly, but maybe it's enough (and after all, being among like-minded folk one or two days a week, having a great time, isn't so bad after all. The rest of the week there's work, anyway, and that pesky housekeeping after that.)
In short, how did you get your life back together?
The short story in bullet points:
I realised I had problems (though to be honest, I had to send myself some pretty big signals to realise it, and at that time, I didn't even know that I had the problems I had).
Then I decided to get help. Again, this was for something I thought I had (which was just a symptom). (I just thought I was having trouble handling stress)
But in the process, I realised that the original "problem" - the stress - was just the result of having other problems that set me on edge.
Then, I found out what the actual problems where.
In the following months, I took care of 2 out of 3 problems. I attempted to solve the other one a couple of times, but fell on my face each time, finally deciding that this won't work - at least now.
And here I am. I might solve the other problem some day, or maybe not, but anyway, my life now is 1000 times better than it was a year ago.
My take on meds: They're not a long-term solution.
They just treat the symptoms. You need to treat the causes.
They're okay as a short-term thing until councelling can kick in and/or you can identify and eliminate your problems, but it should not be a permanent measure (unless your condition is, too - but those sorts of depression are quite rare, it's much more likely that a depression has certain reasons, and will go away once you deal with the underlying cause).
And if you take antidepressants, don't take those that sedate you. There are others that will improve your mood. Still not a permanent solution, but better than being a zombie.
My take on meds: They're not a long-term solution.
They just treat the symptoms. You need to treat the causes.
They're okay as a short-term thing until councelling can kick in and/or you can identify and eliminate your problems, but it should not be a permanent measure (unless your condition is, too - but those sorts of depression are quite rare, it's much more likely that a depression has certain reasons, and will go away once you deal with the underlying cause).
And if you take antidepressants, don't take those that sedate you. There are others that will improve your mood. Still not a permanent solution, but better than being a zombie.
Okay, here's the deal. The last thing that someone dealing with depression needs is more guilt about needing to take medication. Yes, there are times when psychological issues can cause long-term problems including depression. Yes, it's important to seek counselings. Heck, even just working through the results of depression is a good reason to get counseling. And if your antidepressant turns you into a zombie, yeah, you're on the wrong meds. But depression that is caused by chemical imbalances in the brain that will never go away no matter what you do is not nearly as uncommon as you think it is. It's no different than someone who needs to take pills because their thyroid doesn't function correctly. And for those of us who have to live with it, it's very difficult to deal with people responding to depression as if it were something that we could just get over if we only tried hard enough. I'm not saying that's what you're trying to say. Just that it's an oft-repeated pattern and an unnecessary stigma that does exist and is no fun to deal with. And unfortunately can sometimes be a barrier to people getting help when they need it. Anyone dealing with depression needs to get counseling or at least have a support group or something. And, BTW, I'm really really glad that worked so well for you. It's really encouraging to hear someone making real progress dealing with depression, whatever its degree.
Here's to an even keel!
Okay, here's the deal. The last thing that someone dealing with depression needs is more guilt about needing to take medication.
I'm not trying to make people feel guilty.
But depression that is caused by chemical imbalances in the brain that will never go away no matter what you do is not nearly as uncommon as you think it is.
As I said: If your depression cannot be treated with therapy, by all means take the pills.
And for those of us who have to live with it, it's very difficult to deal with people responding to depression as if it were something that we could just get over if we only tried hard enough.
I'm not saying that you're depressed because you don't try hard enough.
And I know that being told "get over it" sucks.
I remember a bad day where my mood was really dark. When I didn't respond to something with complete and utter joy, my aunt reproached me for feeling bad. All but shouted at me, like I was insulting her.
But that's not what I'm doing.
What I want to do is to encourage everyone to give caunselling a try. I know it can be hard to even start it, what with the lack of motivation that often accompanies depression, or not wanting to go because you think people will talk. Or even good ol' autosuggestion: You might not feel great, but you're not *depressed*. That would mean you're *insane*.
Screw that. Those who talk down on you are worthless scum, anyway. Or at least unbelievably stupid.
It doesn't mean you're Murdock from the A-Team.
Really do try it. It's hard, and maybe it won't work, but it's possible it will.
I took it yesterday, so it’s been nice relaxing today! :-)
I know the feeling. One less thing to worry about.
(and recently found a description of an exercise called “The Plank”).
Tell me about it. Any good?
Kaeyoss: I think the problem is not friends blanking you out, it's more you going into isolation. Not entirely true. Some “friends” did just blank me out, ie. not replying to emails, never calling me or making any effort whatsoever. Sod them.
I'm still right: Those weren't friends.
But with other friends, you’re right.
See: You got to know who your friends are. You found out you had friends. Real ones. That's a good thing.
I thought I was due to start counselling today. What happened is that the woman (Cath) explained what was going to happen.
Hang in there. Sometimes, "homework" is all you need.
And if not, it's not that bad. Like pulling teeth, except that the psychatrist won't lie to you about the pain and come at you with forceps. What I'm meaning is it might be a bother (unless you don't mind the whole thing, which does happen) for a while, but if it helps?
What I want to do is to encourage everyone to give caunselling a try. I know it can be hard to even start it, what with the lack of motivation that often accompanies depression, or not wanting to go because you think people will talk. Or even good ol' autosuggestion: You might not feel great, but you're not *depressed*. That would mean you're *insane*.
Screw that. Those who talk down on you are worthless scum, anyway. Or at least unbelievably stupid.
It doesn't mean you're Murdock from the A-Team.Really do try it. It's hard, and maybe it won't work, but it's possible it will.
I totally agree with that. Well, maybe not the worthless scum part. :) Some of them, oh yes, I agree. Others are merely wildly misinformed and will not listen to reason or otherwise interact with reality. (And I'm the one who's crazy?)
And sorry if I came off as defensive before. I've had a lot of people, even people who experience depression, get on my case over the years about the medication issue. Doesn't mean you were.
ericthecleric, good luck and I'm glad you're getting the help you need. Here's hoping that you are able to get on an even keel quickly.
Thanks again for your comments. I’ve been very busy with exam preparation for a while; I took it yesterday, so it’s been nice relaxing today! :-)
Eremite: Between 2006-2008 I exercised much less than I used to; OK, I barely did any. Plus drinking a lot more coke than I used to, and I no longer have a flat stomach. :-( I used to be someone who could eat and drink anything and not put on weight… sigh. So for the last few months I’ve been getting back into walking again (and recently found a description of an exercise called “The Plank”). If I can also ditch smoking, that will also be good. I’ve been managing to not drink coke after 6 pm for a few weeks now, and haven’t suffered for it. I’ve also tried drinking some green tea, which is a drink I used to like when I visited Japanese restaurants.
I just started jogging... I am your stereotypical fat beard... I thought exercise was "beneath me" how wrong I was. I was also scared of being alone with my brain - (OCD thing).
I am realy enjoying myself, I dont push my self too hard but just enough to get out of breath then I walk hard for another 20 mins.
I set myself distance goals just bumping the distance an extra 5 or 10 meters a day.
8th-Dwarf: Good for you on the considerable pay rise and improved family life! It obviously pays to be in a good company.
It was get help or drive my family away...No contest I am so lucky to have such a supportive wife and wonderful children. I focused on getting better so I could be good for me so I could be good for them. (makes sense to me).
I have never had such a good employer (strangely enough its a bank). My team leader at the time was incredible he said let me know what help you need and I will make sure you get it. Good man I don't usually pray (As I'm kind of an agnostic pantheist) but he gets a god do good stuff for this guy when I do...
Kaeyoss: I think the problem is not friends blanking you out, it's more you going into isolation. Not entirely true. Some “friends” did just blank me out, ie. not replying to emails, never calling me or making any effort whatsoever. Sod them. But with other friends, you’re right.
I’m glad you’re on an even keel now.
My best mates were also dealing with their own crap at the same time... Cancer, deaths in the family, drugs, family members with cancer, their own depression..... So it was kind of "so you have crap going on as well ok when we get together its for fun not for wallowing" That worked for us most of the time. Some times it got a bit dark.
I thought I was due to start counselling today. What happened is that the woman (Cath) explained what was going to happen. She said that the way they treat it is with medication, and- for those who need it- sessions with a psychiatric nurse (Cath) who will run me through several exercises (“homework”, if you will) that might help, and of course I’ll be able to talk about stuff as I want, too. She explained that there will be 6-8 sessions, and that these sessions should help me to deal with the symptoms of the depression, to help develop a more positive frame of mind. But for those who need more help, then people are occasionally referred to a psychiatrist to deal with the causes. I really hope I don’t have to do the latter, ie. that Cath and these sessions will help. We’ll...
Stick with it and we are all here to give you encouragement. Depression is not something to be ashamed of its just an illness and it can be cured. Some times it will be hard but the time and effort you spend getting better is worth the results.
Depressions is nasty, something I never understood until I experienced it firsthand. Somehow it would have been easier if the person in question was missing an arm or something. People would get that.
Medication helped, it bought time for the therapy to work. In long term, the therapy was the more important, I think. Hope you get better.
Depression is something I have both been through, and treated people for. It did a good job on my studies, but I have managed to recover, mainly through effective medications.
However, a depression is slightly different from what people usually believe. Always when someone thinks about a future scenario, such as speaking in public or the like, they make a whole spectrum of possible outcomes. It ranges from complete disaster to resounding success. When you're depressed, you lose touch with the scenarios you'd class as positive. So, seeing as you can't visualize success, you don't achieve it. And here's the killer: eventually this repeated failure makes you doubt your own ability. It's not a fast process, it takes perhaps half a year or more. But even so, it's there.
And thus, when you recover from the depression, freeing you from the constraints of the depression, your self-image is still shot. Again, changing this takes about the same amount of time. Certain kinds of therapy, particularly cognitive-based counseling, can help you with that.
However, it's deluding yourself that you can just go straight for the therapy, thereby not having to accept the fact of the depression. If you're still significantly depressed when you go to therapy, you won't be up to doing the work the therapy will require of you.
As for the rumours about personality change due to antidepressants, it's simply a case of other people changing their expectation of you as well, making them see your recovery as a change of personality. It's also not that uncommon that along with the antidepressants, you get bensodiazepines, a class of anxiolytics that are seriously addictive and yes, do isolate you emotionally. The solution is to use ONLY antidepressants; what they change in you is they give you full access to ALL your feelings.
Hi all,
Don't know if this thread is still on, but here are my thoughts on the subject.
Don't use drugs. It seems to be north-american thing to want to solve depression and states of mind with medication, but over here in Europe we tend to stay away from them. I took medication myself, as did my sister, and my girlfriend, and it never helped, instead keeping people (from our experience) in a lethargic state.
The thing to look for is the root of the problem and face it, may it be via counselling or anything else that works for you (art, etc...). I agree that a healthy lifestyle, and progressive day to day objectives will help loads. I always keep in mind what my AA mother learned when she first started her life away from alcohol: 24 hrs at a time.
Best of luck
Wow. Can't believe I never found this thread.
I'm biased when it comes to the pharmacological perspective. I work in a psychosocial clubhouse with mentally ill adults, so from my pov when someone decides to ditch the medications, bad stuff usually happens. Sometimes I'm there for it(indeed, sometimes it happens to me), sometimes it's something that happens at their home. On the whole, not good. That said, I do realize and very much appreciate the effacity and even necessity of holistic approaches to mental health. In the medication group I run I always make sure to bring up cutting edge stuff in terms of mental health treatment that does not involve medication. One of the more promising things I've seen is a marked increase in theraputic approaches to depression as opposed to pharmacological, as well as the increased acceptance of both non-western and western experiemental theraputic practices. The most promising thing I saw as of this Wednesday was a study on magnetic therapy for depression reportedly improving symptoms for roughly half of the people in the study. Another(older) study expounded on the need for people with depression to do some kind of physical exercise- it's good to see that people here are doing qi gong, running and the like. Someone on my caseload swears by yoga, while another is a former champion karateka whom I encourage to start practicing again to mitigate his symptoms.
Depression doesn't suck. It blows right in your face, and with a breath like carrion mixed with powdered glass. Medication is a little bit like a wet cloth wrapped around the face- it keeps out the glass to an extent, but it does nothing for the stench. It's up to you to figure out what to fill your poupourri satchel with.
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RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8
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+1 with Freehold.
The meds put a buffer between me and dysfunction. I was reminded of that last night when I was discussing a possible threat to my GodDaughter. I said "Wrapped beneath all the Wellbutrin cotton keeping me sane is that white hot core of rage that is my depression. It's there for a reason. If she gets hurt, you'll see that reason."
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When I was in college at UNC back in 1995, I avoided being shot by a guy who went off his meds by a measure of about 5 minutes.
He was a law student who had a host of issues, but decided to stop taking his meds. One day he took a high-powered hunting rifle and began a slow-march up the middle of Henderson street, shooting at anyone within sight. He killed two people and wounded six more before a bouncer at one of the bars ran out and tackled him from behind.
When I saw his picture in the paper the next day, I realized I had walked past him on my way to class, just as he was getting out of his car.
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RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8
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When I was in college at UNC back in 1995, I avoided being shot by a guy who went off his meds by a measure of about 5 minutes.
He was a law student who had a host of issues, but decided to stop taking his meds. One day he took a high-powered hunting rifle and began a slow-march up the middle of Henderson street, shooting at anyone within sight. He killed two people and wounded six more before a bouncer at one of the bars ran out and tackled him from behind.
When I saw his picture in the paper the next day, I realized I had walked past him on my way to class, just as he was getting out of his car.
Which is why I like my meds, and my co-workers like them too ;-)
(fortunately I'm self destructive, not a blaze of glory kind of guy)