RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32
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If you feature an airship in the game there is every chance that the PCs will end up in command of it, one way or another - and a lot of DMs might not like that, particularly in a campaign where such things are not common.
I thought much the same . . . which is why my airship crashes in a fiery heap, after just helping the party get far enough that they might be able to make the rest of the journey in time.
If mine doesn't make the cut, I'll post it here.Ditto.
Me too
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Yeah, in my proposal it was also 'the Azurestone' (of Azurestone) which was stolen (by the Red Raven) ... and there is also something of a potential moral quandary in returning it.
I had another Red Raven stealing the stone (Guardian Stone... which may or may not be azure), for reason that he at least thought were noble. Maybe they'll realize that it's such a common plot because it's so good!
I also suspect that this is the reason that we had to describe some encounters and the monster, to help distinguish between ideas. (Mine involve a cup of blood given willingly and creatures of steam and hate).
Contributor
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Well, the main reason that they wanted to see your encounters was because they wanted to see your encounters. Someone drilled this into me, and I conciously think of it every time I write an adventure or a proposal; You can have the best backstory in the world, but it doesn't matter, because the player's don't play it. They play the adventure.
Paizo wants to know what your encounters are like, becasue that's the part of the adventure that the players will remember.
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Well... just got confirmation that my proposal was one of those rejected for being over 800 words (the guidelines said “answer the following five questions in no more than 800 words”, which I did, in 782 words… not counting the questions themselves).
So here it goes for posterity. My take on W3: Flight of the Red Raven. Feel free to comment...
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What is the object that vanished and why is it important to retrieve it?
The PCs are seeking to retrieve the corpse of Dravras Jonil, Azurestone’s founder and archdruid. Time is of the essence for the party has but a week to get the body back before Dravras’ soul gets beyond the reach of the reincarnate spell.
Dravras is a hero in the heart and mind of Azurestone’s simple folks. He has been with them for as long as anyone can remember, having extended his life through multiple uses of the reincarnate spell. The small rural community believes itself lost without the guidance of its ancient leader.
As the PCs start on this quest, the only information they have is that the corpse was stolen by “Red Raven”, and that “it” is heading for a hidden valley in the Fog Peak Mountains. No one in Azurestone has ever heard of this “Red Raven”. As for the Fog Peak Mountains, they are shrouded in mystery and, for some long forgotten reason, are viewed as a taboo subject.
What are two of the obstacles the PCs must overcome while chasing down the culprit?
1) The party journeys through wild and uncharted territories, but the land is far from empty. Aside from dangerous beasts and natural hazards, the area is also dotted with numerous ruins with their own stories to tell. One such structure used to be an elven observatory. It is currently inhabited by a young lamia posing as a hermit. Old manuscripts found in that place might shed some light on Red Raven’s motives and Dravras’ sinister secret, and prove invaluable for PCs to shape events in the final chapter.
2) The natural tunnel leading to Uttare Valley is guarded by a Grief Thresher, a creature of Zon-Kuthon and a by product of Dravras’ curse. It has managed to fend off the previous group of adventurer who passed that way a week ago. He can actually count on the help of that party’s former cleric, now a shadow.
Who took the object and why?
Many years ago, Dravras served as a druid and religious figure to the isolated human community of Uttare Valley, high in the Fog Peak Mountains. A healthy rivalry existed between him and the resident cleric of Sarenrae, Zarna, the Red Raven. This competition bred jealousy in Dravras’ heart. So much so that he eventually turned his prayers towards Zon-Kuthon in the hope of increasing his influence through dark divine magic.
Ultimately, a civil war erupted. Aware that his side was losing, Dravras focused all the strength of his envy and greed into a curse of epic proportion, condemning Red Raven and her followers to a life in shadows, prisoners in the Fog Peak Mountains. With his few remaining partisans at heel, the archdruid left the valley and established the village of Azurestone.
Ever since, Zarna and the good people of Uttare Valley have remained captive of Dravras’ curse, restless souls bound to a un-life existence. But, a week ago, a group of adventurers unknowingly broke the seal to Red Raven’s prison. On their way back to Azurestone, these adventurers ran into a fuming Dravras who managed to kill them all. However, he too got mortally wounded. A lumberjack found his body and brought it back to the village.
The archdruid’s apprentices made preparation for a reincarnation the next day, but during the night Zarna slipped into the druidic grove and stole the corpse. Her goal is to bring Dravras’ body back with her to Uttare Valley, raise him from the dead, let him witness the pain he has caused, and, she hopes, convince him to lift the curse.
What will the final showdown with the culprit look like?
Red Raven’s trail leads the party to a village of undeads nested in the Fog Peak Mountains. The PCs arrive as Zarna raises Dravras from the dead and pleads with the druid to lift the curse. Years have only partially softened Dravras’ heart, and unless the PCs can persuade him otherwise, the archdruid has no intention of giving in to Zarna’s supplication.
Depending on whether the PCs side with the druid or the cursed cleric, the final showdown can take the form of:
- a daring escape form a village of furious living-deads,
- a display of wits and diplomacy to get Dravras to change his mind, or at least reveal how to break the evil enchantment,
- a climatic clash with the (once) great archdruid of Azurestone.
What new monster do you plan to include in this adventure?
Grief Thresher
As dark as the shadows which gave it birth, this hulking creature of gloom and sorrow feeds on pain and misery. Being vulnerable to lights of all type, it often uses its spell-like darkness ability as a shield. The moan it continuously emits acts as a crushing despair spell, and any humanoid affect by this lament and subsequently slain by a grief thresher rises as a shadow under the control of its killer within 1d4 rounds.
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If mine doesn't make the cut, I'll post it here.
I'll be here...
Yeah, in my proposal it was also 'the Azurestone' (of Azurestone) which was stolen (by the Red Raven) ... and there is also something of a potential moral quandary in returning it.I had another Red Raven stealing the stone (Guardian Stone... which may or may not be azure), for reason that he at least thought were noble. Maybe they'll realize that it's such a common plot because it's so good!
...although I'm suddenly not feeling as creative as I thought I was.
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RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32
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...although I'm suddenly not feeling as creative as I thought I was.
I hear ya. That's the danger of asking others to share. I've already secondguessed my own entry about a half dozen times based on some of the little tidbits that others have shared.
Stiff competition for sure.
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Stiff competition for sure.
Yes it is. But then I would expect nothing less from the fine people here.
After our submission, my wife laughed and said -- "we have a wedding story -- something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue".
If I don't make it I will probably share the highlights of my ideas.
Definitely some stiff competition.
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Stiff competition for sure.Yes it is. But then I would expect nothing less from the fine people here.
After our submission, my wife laughed and said -- "we have a wedding story -- something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue".
If I don't make it I will probably share the highlights of my ideas.
Definitely some stiff competition.
Here, here. I'll drink to that! The Paizo community is full of the best people in the multiverse (which is a Wheel by the way).
I too will share my full query if I don't make the cut.
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I suddenly feel like posting my summary may have been a nad idea, if everyone else is keeping theirs completly under wraps
oh well
and i thought the multiverse was a big ball of wobbly gobbly time stuff
Don't sweat it...I made a questionable pact with "an outsider" and I just don't want to negate the contract prematurely...pain of death and all, you understand.
Me too! A couple teasers:
Exploding wildlife
Ancient magic
The Red Raven is a tribe of Shoanti
I'll give away a few of the pieces of my submission now:
- The Red Raven was the thing that was taken.
- Azurestone is named for the azurite ore that is found in the nearby mountains.
- The thief's identity is an ironic twist of fate.
Do you mean SPIN of fate? It was you huh? You did it! Admit it!! It was you! O:)
I will share the highlights, but probably not all 800 words. I will save you that sort of torture for when you are the editor. Of course luck willing, you can purchase more than the 800 next May. :)
Good luck to everyone who did submit!
hmmm too late for me to flesh this one out so I will stick it out here for someone with more time.
Azurestone is like Lexington, KY and the Red Raven is a triple-crown-type thoroughbred that is answering the call of the wild.
Wow, this post struck me as really surreal. I live in Lexington. And there's a bar called the Triple Crown Lounge about a block from my office.
FWIW, I entered. I'm trying to not get my hopes up...
...although I'm suddenly not feeling as creative as I thought I was.
I hear you. You could either:
A) Hope everyone else has terrible grammar.
B) Assume there was a finite amount of scenarios, and our collective grey matter focused on the best ones naturally.
On the bright side of things, hey, 1 in 15. Good odds!
Even if we don't win, how can you hold it against a guy with a "Bedknobs and Broomsticks" reference in his profile? :)
I'll probably share my proposal here on the off chance its unsuccessful (hides fear through bravado... poorly).
Also it looks like many people had similar ideas so I can be firm in the knowledge that even if I don't do all the work, I'm sure to see my idea in print XD
Oh and by the way Fatespinner, I think you rammed me so hard I turned into a Goblin, and since you can't see what I'm riding in the picture, I say its a giant three legged turnip (which may have been a better idea for my unique monster than the one I submitted).
I'll share my query as soon as I get my rejection letter. I'd love to get feedback from all you bright folks about why it didn't win. Until then, here are some things I know I should have done differently:
1) I didn't know there were ogres in the Pathfinder AP (though I remember reading that several weeks ago) and I included them with out knowing how that might clash with their plans for them.
2) I stuck in half-ogres at the last minute without thinking about it and then panicked that they were closed content . . . until I found them in Tome of Horrors.
3) I didn't have Tome of Horrors when I was working on the query.
4) My query looks like it's by someone who's never written a module. I'm thinking now that it really should look more like it was reduced from a full outline that I know would fill 22,000 words.
5) And because I didn't have a full outline, my query was fatally short: 575 words or so altogether. I thought the questionas were answered adequately and I didn't know what more to add. I didn't want to put in a bunch of stuff they didn't ask for.
6) I didn't do a draft until the morning it was due, so I didn't have time to deal with the short word count. All week long I told myself, Do an early draft! I didn't listen.
What kind of worries are giving you nightsweats?
I'll post mine too if/when I get that rejection letter. Meanwhile I keep reminding myself that if I chew too much off my fingers, I won't be able to type. : )
What kind of worries are giving you nightsweats?
Let's see:
1) It didn't arrive.
2) It did arrive but it wasn't compatible and the translator tore it into gobbledegook.
3) I should have made it more factual instead of writing it as if it was the Adventure synopsis you always get at the beginning of a module.
4) I repeated myself too much by covering the points twice (once in running text and once as a bullet pointed summary) - and I still came in at barely 600 words before personal details.
5) Tagging a word count summary on the end will be taken as insulting and see it ditched on the spot.
6) it is so far off the beaten and expected track that it will take a DC600 Survival check just to find it.
Hm - I think I'll go and climb the walls for a while after that.
What kind of worries are giving you nightsweats?Surprisingly little -- other than there are probably at least 10 people with better submissions than mine.
Same. I'm pretty sure mine is solid. I'd written plenty of queries for Dungeon (among other things) and I spent a lot of time on this, multiple drafts, etc.
But all the time and effort I put into it to make it technically "perfect" (hopefully) doesn't prevent 10 other people from having a better idea.
Oddly enough, I'm excited, but not overly tense. Truth be told, I don't expect to be able to compete against most of you. Regardless, it'll be a nice learning experience.
Oddly enough, I'm excited, but not overly tense. Truth be told, I don't expect to be able to compete against most of you. Regardless, it'll be a nice learning experience.
Same here.
And frankly, I'm excited enough about entering that I'm perfectly happy collecting a rejection letter (this being my first ever submission). Though I would much rather make it into the final ten, of course....
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RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32
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Same here.And frankly, I'm excited enough about entering that I'm perfectly happy collecting a rejection letter (this being my first ever submission). Though I would much rather make it into the final ten, of course....
This is my first ever submission for an adventure/full module too.
I've made two smaller scale submissions over just the last 3 months or so. I'm starting a collection of rejection letters.
So far, one clear rejection letter, and one letter that rejected one idea while accepting (tentatively) another. It's all going in a folder.
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Oddly enough, I'm excited, but not overly tense. Truth be told, I don't expect to be able to compete against most of you. Regardless, it'll be a nice learning experience.Same here.
And frankly, I'm excited enough about entering that I'm perfectly happy collecting a rejection letter (this being my first ever submission). Though I would much rather make it into the final ten, of course....
Right with you guys on this.
I just realized I misspelled the name of the main deity in my proposal. Damn it! You try to be careful, and a minor error (which can make all the difference) slips through.
Oh well...