Aldern Foxglove

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RPG Superstar 7 Season Star Voter. 12 posts. No reviews. No lists. No wishlists.


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Star Voter Season 7

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Trekkie90909 wrote:
Quote:


Rapier of Shining Influence

omited

Formatting:

First paragraph is well written and tells me you know rapiers, but tells me nothing of your item’s special magical abilities. IMO the buff should be a morale bonus to play into the influence/dazzling display/charisma theme. I like your counter, but like the rest of your description it feels like gilding; try to integrate the description into your mechanics.

The ‘during combat’ tag does not really add to the description; on the other hand something about having to use the ability before the attack roll is made...

Thanks for taking the time to critique my item. I greatly appreciate the feedback, especially the point of the bonus being a morale bonus, d'oh.

Star Voter Season 7

frank gori wrote:
dmfumbl wrote:

** spoiler omitted **

Notes:
Giving an even better version of Divine grace to a group was overpowered tot he extreme and the item description went a little overboard so I trimmed that up but tried to retain the spirit of the item.

This is still a teamwork driven weapon that inspires it's allies but now in a more mechanically balanced and conventional way. It breaks the action economy a little but with only three charges and the possibility of a wasted charge it's a good but not over powered way.

Thanks for taking the time to critique my item. I greatly appreciate the feedback.

Star Voter Season 7

Any comments and feedback are appreciated

Rapier of Shining Influence
Aura transmutation; CL 11th
Slot none; Price 38,220 gp; Weight 2 lbs.
Description
A finely crafted +1 agile rapier, this weapon is expertly balanced, and looks to be of Taldorian design. The blade incorporates diamond dust that not only accounts for its superior point, but also causes it a shimmer and sparkle in the presence of any light source. Braided gold-plated steel is woven around three gleaming emeralds into a one-quarter cage basket hilt to protect the wielder’s hand. The basket hilt can be used like a gauntlet to deliver an armored punch attack. Using the rapier in this way does not confer any of its magical bonuses to the attack.

Three times per day, during combat, the wielder can attempt to use the power of the blade to influence allies. On command, as a free action, the wielder can cause the blade to flare brightly and crackle with arcane energy prior to the wielder’s next attack. If the attack hits, the dashing display of sword fighting grants all allies within 60 feet the wielder’s Charisma bonus (minimum of +1) as a bonus to hit for their next attack. If the wielder’s attack fails, no bonus is granted, and a daily use of the blade is expended. For each use of the special power of the Rapier of Shining Influence one of the emeralds in the basket hilt dims. The emerald regains its full luster the following day.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, cat’s grace, mass eagle’s splendor; Cost 19,270 gp

Star Voter Season 7

Rapier of Shining Influence
Aura transmutation; CL 11th
Slot none; Price 38,220 gp; Weight 2 lbs.
Description
A finely crafted +1 agile rapier, this weapon is expertly balanced, and looks to be of Taldorian design. The blade incorporates diamond dust that not only accounts for its superior point, but also causes it a shimmer and sparkle in the presence of any light source. Braided gold-plated steel is woven around three gleaming emeralds into a one-quarter cage basket hilt to protect the wielder’s hand. The basket hilt can be used like a gauntlet to deliver an armored punch attack. Using the rapier in this way does not confer any of its magical bonuses to the attack.

Three times per day, during combat, the wielder can attempt to use the power of the blade to influence allies. On command, as a free action, the wielder can cause the blade to flare brightly and crackle with arcane energy prior to the wielder’s next attack. If the attack hits, the dashing display of sword fighting grants all allies within 60 feet the wielder’s Charisma bonus (minimum of +1) as a bonus to hit for their next attack. If the wielder’s attack fails, no bonus is granted, and a daily use of the blade is expended. For each use of the special power of the Rapier of Shining Influence one of the emeralds in the basket hilt dims. The emerald regains its full luster the following day.
Construction
Requirements Craft Magic Arms and Armor, cat’s grace, mass eagle’s splendor; Cost 19,270 gp

Any and all feedback is welcome and appreciated.
Thanks

Star Voter Season 7

Item sent. Thanks for offering your advice and sharing your time with the community so selflessly.

Star Voter Season 7

On first pass, I really like this one. I can just see either an encounter or a full story springing out of the backstory here.

Star Voter Season 7

Haladir wrote:

Icicle of the Frozen Waste

** spoiler omitted **

Thank you for taking the time to review my item, along with valid points for me to consider going forward.

Star Voter Season 7

GM_Solspiral wrote:
67) Icicle of the Frozen Waste

Thanks for your review, great points to consider going forward.

Star Voter Season 7

Saint Caleth wrote:

Icicle of the Frozen Waste

Thanks for the insightful reveiew. In fact, when I was crafting it, the second ability was the first idea, which I didn't feel was strong enough to stand on its own. That should have been my clue to drop it entirely rather than pair it with a second (better) feature.

Star Voter Season 7

Nickolas Floyd wrote:
dmfumbl wrote:
Icicle of the Frozen Waste

Nickolas, thank you for taking the time to review my item. I appreciate the feedback and constructive advice on how I could make it better.

Star Voter Season 7

Icicle of the Frozen Waste
Aura moderate evocation; CL 11th
Slot --; Price 9,400 gp; Weight 1/2 lb.
Description
This item looks like a normal icicle about 4 to 6 inches in length with a 1 inch diameter at one end tapering to a dull point at the other end. The item does not melt in above freezing climates.

If the icicle is put in boiling water, or touched by an open flame, the icicle turns from solid form to a light mist covering a 40 ft sphere centered on the user. Any damage inflicted within the circle now includes the cold energy type in addition to any other energy type associated with it. If a combatant has one or more resistances, divide damage evenly between all energy types before determining how much damage is resisted for each type.

The mist does not grant any concealment and dissipates after 1 minute.

Alternately, if the icicle is put in non-boiling water, either fresh or salt water, a solid disk of ice appears on the surface. The size of the disk is determined by the amount of surface area available in the water up to a maximum 40 ft disk. The disk appears centered on a point in the water within 50 ft determined by the user and lasts for 1 minute. In all other regards it functions like the alternate ability of the freezing sphere spell.

The icicle is crafted from purified glacial water from a remote location in the Crown of the World.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, freezing sphere, ice storm, glacial water; Cost 4,700 gp

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Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated. Thanks

Star Voter Season 7

Congrats to everyone and best of luck... can't wait to see all those great monsters!