HEY WHAT ABOUT US WEREN'T WE A GOOD IDEA FOR A—
*The pigeons fly into an aerial tripwire*
WAIT WHAT
*A massive fly swatter-like device activates, smacking the pigeons up to the moon*
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A hooded Yugoloth sniffs the air.
"Watch where you point that thing, ya glorified matchstick. And ain't ya heard of KC? Kobold Cleaver? Lord of the Boards? He was famous before we left. "And we're here because this is s'posed to be a free area. What we need is another neutral ground, 'cause we even helped in the big battle an' ever'bodies prejudicin' us!"
Suddenly, everyone sees a group of Yugoloths flying towards teh Sanctum. There is a brief struggle with the wards, then they manage to get in.
The dwarves continue bombing the constructs, but they are beginning to run low on bombs. Suddenly, the Yugoloths veer off course."Gotcha, ya morons!" Most of the force stays to fight their surprised 'allies', while a third goes to help the dwarves.
The Pigeons/Yugoloths charge at the Armies of Light.
The Pigeons also charge, flying on magical ferryboats and iron contraptions.
The Yugoloths yawn, having sat watching the entire time. "Whatever. As you would say, O Cryptic, Cliched and Annoying One, all will eventually be destroyed."
"Indeed. We have finally freed ourselves, and now we shall have revenge."
What the heck is that gorilla doing?
The Pigeon flies in. "Bad Wasp! Bad Wasp! Get out of here!"Whacks with stick until Wasp leaves back to the RP thread where he belongs. "Sorry 'bout that. He keeps forgetting."
*sigh* The shark was but a tool. You give hope then you take it away. You break them. Suddenly, the Yugoloths fly in. "Indeed. A mourning enemy can spread despair, a one who has disappeared will not cause it."We have returned, to ally with your kind."
"LOOK OUT!!! IT IS COMING FOR US!!!"
*Looks down and sees that there are no more Pigeons*
*The Pigeons fly into the fray, spells whizzing and swords flashing,howls of pain anger and fear echoing all around.
It's fine. If you hadn't killed us, 4E would have. ATTACK, PIGEONS!!! FOR THE YUGOLOTHS!!!
It's fine. If you hadn't killed us, 4E would have.
PIGEONS CHARGE!!!
they are attacking! We're gonna be massacred!
*Takes a step back* By the gods....there are...so many...we're going to be massacred.
*Gasps* What the...TREACHERY!!! PIGEONS, TO ARMS!!!
I'm here for the thieves' guild. What do you wish to talk about? *Draws crossbow* You lie. Either that or you're mad. At any rate, you have come here, along with all you're friends. Now, I can finally--
An alliance? You're mad. Why should we make an alliance, or even a truce? With the help of the Defectives, we can level your pathetic resistance to the ground.
*The leader of the Pigeons flies in* What the hell is going on here?
What the hell...it's KC's uncle! ATTACK!!!!
Sigh...where is he?
Kobold Cleaver was here just a few minutes ago. You could use our dog Llamafrog to help track him. Alright. Bye! *Grabs Llamafrog and starts following scent*
Dammit, he got away again! Where are they!
Hey, have you people seen:
*Leaves and kills for meat and thrills. *Glares at Moody, Acts real Rudey, Squishes him flatter than great-aunt Judy. Now get to work!
Sooo... am I sentenced to death or still in a job so long as escaped prisoners are running about willy nilly. I have NO CLUE as to what's going on here. Very well. Find the prisoners, and you're spared. Leave now.
Very well. However, since we are still searching for the escaped prisoners, we have no prison. No need to mind, though. In death, rules are very simple indeed.
LATER, IN THE COURTROOM...
You're. *******. Fired.
GAAAAUGH!!!!!
Hey, we're ba--
Prisoner escape! Prisoner escape! TO ARMS-- *Is decapitated*
When are visitors' hours? I need to talk to someone.I'll have to ask the boss but I think we're 3-5 on weekends and 4-4:03 on weekdays. That's enough. There are no 'visiting hours'. This is the Pigeon Dungeon. Here, we have different laws.One of which is that any insults will be met with death. Attacking prisoners incurs a 1 gp. fine, and killing them incurs a 5 gp. fine. Prisoners who attempt to break out are eviscerated. Prisoners who attempt to sue are eviscerated. Prisoners who attempt to inform otehrs of any aspect of the Dungeon are eviscerated. Any questions?
One angry accountant can shut a dungeon like this down for good. I canalready see you deducted about three times more than you should have off your taxes, so watch yer mouth, pillow filler. You've been warned. Also, you should know that laws do not apply here.*Throws in dungeon*
Kobold Cleaver has failed. His Lemmings are no more. He rots in our dungeon.
Well if this dungeon needs an accountant in a pigeon suit... I still have one from last Halloween and I think I finally got the blood stains out. Leave. Now. We only hire real Pigeons.
Don't ever take a bath and stick a feather duster up your 'howza' and nobody will be able to tell the difference.What if I wear a pigeon costume?Can I be a guard here? I like to guard and I work for fingers. Prisoner's fingers.No. We only trust Pigeons to do the job. *Grabs seagull by the tail* And if you wanna dress up like a seagull, just don't use the toilet and act like your Wisdom score is negative. Did you notice where you are? Into the dungeon with you!*Tosses into cell taht resembles a cage*
Another one! This plant tried to eat one of our guards!
Can I be a guard here? I like to guard and I work for fingers. Prisoner's fingers. No. We only trust Pigeons to do the job.
We have another prisoner! I caught this Thieving Wasp trying to sell Pigeon Repellent!
Kobold Cleaver has failed. His Lemmings are no more. He rots in our dungeon.
We just want you all to know, Kobold Cleaver is currently in the dungeon. He will thus be unable to respond to your posts.
Welcome to the Dungeon. We currently have only three inhabitants. They are Diswiker, Baby Mind Flayer, and Kobold Cleaver himself. Each of these folk were captured easily, except for Kobold Cleaver. Fortunately, thouigh he put up quite a fight, he made the mistake of fighting Candle Lighter. While he fought, Defectives came and 'converted' all of his Lemmings. Lemmings are now extinct, by the way.
*Pigeons bind KC and take him to the dungeon*
Ha ha ha and the secret mastermind of the pigeon conspiracy appears Look, we don't need a flying monkey's help. We're managing quite fine without--oh crap, KC's killed Candle Lighter. Oh well. While KC was preoccupied fighting the dragon, the Defectives were able to 'convert' all the Lemmings. KC has lost.
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