Eoko Sandwalker's page

I won't be on for a few days. If I am on for some reason, it's because I was lucky.

"My question is where are the firebenders and the gigantic drill? Oops, sorry, wrong anime."

Eoko sighs. "We're supposed to always be up for an adventure, A.S.S. It's in our contract." She mounts her horse-named Rarity-then begins running through the random encounter tables for plains and forests in her head.

Eoko is NOT a morning person. Somehow, she changed into her bathrobe while sleeping, and is now shuffling around, disheveled and looking to imbibe large amounts of caffeine. After finding the requisite amount of coffee (i.e., the equivalent of how much mead a dwarf would drink with a hundred platinum burning in his pocket in a single night) Eoko lets out a sight of relief as the bathrobe morphs back to her normal outfit.

"2-to-1 odds on bandits. Wouldn't put money on it though, since the GM has removed Knowledge (tvtropes), from my character sheet, but a trait will allow me to make the check untrained, at least. Apparently, he doesn't want to put up with my shenanigans for this adventure."

Eoko stays up all night extrapolating different quest paths, then realizes that the GM won't put up with her shenanigans and falls asleep on the table.

Eoko is drooling. Flat out drooling. "Wealth... by... level... completely disregarded... we'll be able to break the game with this..."

Reflex Save: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (5) + 11 = 16

Eoko is a bit slow to the punch, and the coins slip away from her. "...ELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!" she roars.

Eoko gives a smile. "Since Iron Gods is coming out soon, I'm betting that the GM will go crazy. As a matter of fact..." She gestures towards the waitress, who has a cybernetic arm and a lightsaber hilt. "Case in point. We can probably use these."

She then takes out her own tablet-failing to notice that her right eye has strange blue lines running through it and seems to be glowing slightly-and takes a look. "See? No Continuity Police are coming after us."

Eoko takes out an massive compendium of notes, then pages through them. "Well, since the giant activity on the Giant Attack days in this area is because the giants run away in terror as the green dragon marauds the next village over for food, so it can't be that. Hand me that copy of the Forester, will you, Kari? And do you have Seoni's notes on the Rise? I also need those files I lent to you from the Pathfinders interdimensionally, in order to better extrapolate whether this is a Small Beginnings with a Mysterious Threat tie-in, or a simple One-Shot Adventure. That will be rather important, I'm afraid."

Eoko is reading an angry letter on red parchment. "Yeah, yeah, sure... Um, we might want to stop breaking the fourth wall... I'm holding in my hands right now an angry letter from Deadpool..." With an audible *POP*, another letter appears, and Eoko groans. "Annnnd there's one from the Order of the Stick. Oi. Yeah, I'll help you, if only to get these guys off my back."

Hiiiiii.

Me again, writing up backstory for Aelia Rodhire, a former legionnaire who got retired after after a massive blow to the leg crippled her. Now, she is watching over a small, out-of-the-way village. After her backstory is complete, PM incoming.

Eoko's whiskers twitch. "Alright, I suppose I better accept this deal before Deadpool becomes outraged that we get to break the fourth wall more then him, and breaks through reality to slaughter us all. Oops, there I go again! Anyways, I accept."

"And you're tripling that? Let me make some calculations..." Eoko pulls out a sheet of paper, and begins writing on it.

"35,000 gold for diamonds, 5,050 gold for spellcasting services... Wait a minute. 3000 platinum!?!?! This screams either 'set up' or 'skulking black figure slaying! Tier 6 heroes like us shouldn't be getting that much money!!! I've been conducting heavy studies into this kind of thing, and according to my charts, we should be having that much at TWICE our tier! NO WAY!!! TELL ME WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON!!!"

"Mmmm, no thanks. Although I'm sure the rest of my party will charge blindly in-especially A.S.S. over there-I want to make sure we're completely covered. Although we've never had to raise the funds to get our party members resurrected, some of the higher end rez spells required to raise members from particularly nasty stuff, such as vampirism, can be pricy. I want to make sure that everything is covered here."

Eoko scratches herself for a moment, then says. "Well, tell me what the pay is. If you give me an estimate, then I might be convinced, as the pay may be enough to cover the whole party's raise deads and a resurrection. Though, be forewarned: there is an approximately 67% chance that after we do what little task you put up to us and come to collect our pay, we'll be just in time to watch a few mysterious figures in black slay you, and so you'll give us a mysterious clue as to what's really going on with your final bet. So, the contract's really your best bet."

Eoko pulls out a book from her pouch and consults it. "Hmmmm... my notes say today, in this place, a perfectly normal, routine quest will be issued, which will quickly-and comedically-spiral out of control."

Eoko issues a soft pur. "Well, this looks to be my lucky day. For some incredibly cosmic mistake, this party didn't band together for this kind of thing at Hero Tier 1-according to where we met, it should've been a goblin raid, followed by an outbreak of ghouls, which lead into a huge city where we had to stop a murdering cult, and then kill a den of disgusting, hillbilly ogres... well, the list goes on and on."

Eoko then fishes out a three page contract with fish grease all over it. "This contract ensures that you, the contracter, will provide for resurrection through raise dead, resurrection recovery through greater restoration, mysterious, cryptic advice when necessary, cures for all afflictions (for uncurable conditions such as lycanthropy and vampirism, please see sub-clause three, where the party is to be recompensed an amount of gold pieces and fish appropriate to the threat level the former party member poses to the party [see: mook, henchman, lieutenant, or Big Bad Evil Guy]), and liability-and equal recompense-for any ills that befall the party due to incomplete information through cryptic hints provided on your part. Please sign here, here, here, here, annnnd here."

This trope is the core of Eoko: Extremely Genre-Savvy.

The last few buttery, greasy remains of Eoko's popcorn fall to the floor. She sighs and stretches out. "Mrroow. You should be grateful that I flipped griffons this time. Otherwise, the inn would probably be in smoldering ruins right now."

Reference Check: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (1) + 3 = 4

Back for the day.

Eoko leans over to Kari. "Yeah. Hold on a sec..."

The catfolk fishes out a gold piece from her pouch. Dragons I attack, griffons I let Vaan deal with it.

Eoko flips the coin...

Coin Flip: 1d2 ⇒ 2

...and sits back and enjoys the show.

For classified reasons, I will be gone for a week. [REDACTED] is calling me over to his [REDACTED] even now, so I must go. Hey, stop doing that with your [REDACTED]! If any Daleks come to your door, it has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH ME!

Eoko gives a slightly fanged smile. "Ya know me too well, Karinah... Though I know Vaan to be a good judge of character, and judging by the way he's pointing an arrow at the little squirt, I'd say he's not to be trusted." She draws a sword hilt and points it at the halfling. "What's your game?" A gleaming, blue blade of energy emerges from it.

Eoko sighs. "Hmmm, let me guess, a couple orcs went ahead and attacked you on the trail, only surviving member of your caravan, yada yada yada. Not helping you today. I need a cat nap."

It's just something I elected to do to go with my absurd anime-hero motif. Currently, I can jump 25 feet straight up into the air.

Eoko shrugs at Vaan's comment. "It's considered a delicacy in some cultures, actually. And, yeah, I've been keeping busy. It's Thursday, dufus: giant attack day." Eoko shakes her head. "I still can't believe how many attacks, raids, sieges, strikes, assaults, offensives, onslaughts, etc. this town gets from monsters. And even more strange is the fact that there is ALWAYS a couple of adventurers to save this place. I've heard that no less than six quests to save the world have originated here."

Sitting down at the table, Eoko stretches out. "So, what have you been up to, Alec, Vaan?"

A loud BOOM! booms outside, and soon after something sounds like a giant groaning. "HA! You like that, you hsssfttt?!?!*"

A moment later, a massive thump is heard, and a young catfolk enters, her eyes glinting from the massive fire outside, and her mindblade just dissipating. "Hey, do you have any raw fish?" Eoko always had a tendency to make dramatic-and messy-entrances.

*catfolk swear word

Alright, working on that.

Two feats, leaving me one to pick up for Expanded Knowledge...

Would you guys rather have me pick Energy Burst or Energy Bolt as my signature move?

FINALLY! I'M FREEEEE FREE!

Alright... so, finally, Eoko get's her stuff done. Will edit her alias in a little while.

Stat Array:

Str: 12
Dex: 23
Con: 13
Int: 16
Cha: 20
Wis: 7

Need to get off, but: I wouldn't mind glasses. Glasses are badass.

You know what? I'm adding that 3 to Charisma OR Dexterity. Depends on what I roll for this mysterious 1d2...

1d2 ⇒ 1

And I intentionally kept my wisdom low, actually :)

"FOR ADRENALINE! FOR COOL FACTOR! FOR-oh, SQUIRREL!"

Fighting Style: Leaping into battle, slicing up somebody with that massive soulblade, leaping back out, and making them go BOOM! (i.e., doing a vital psychic spring attack, then using psionics to make them explode.)

Eoko is your classic swashbuckling girl. She's a complete adrenaline junkie, and has been known to knock her fellow party members out so that she can take on that incredibly dangerous monster all by herself. Eoko always has a quick quip on the tip of her tongue, and has often gotten her party out of their depth...

As the glaive impales Eoko, she says nothing. Nobody sees the light fade from her eyes as she hangs there. Her heart stops. She is gone.

Dammit. I was really looking forward to playing her. Oh well. Should I make a new character?

** spoiler omitted **

Actually... I tripped the #!@$%(*. Edited my post. Not sure if that's okay, but Eoko has decided to take a more tactical approach to the fight. If not, than that post I made is this round.

Note on Eoko's voice: strangely enough, she has a strong Thuvish accent with a leonine pur. I'm looking for reactions from the victors.

Sorry for being gone so long. Had a lot of writing to do.

While the rest of the Order cheered wildly, Eoko stayed completely silent, hands on her shining obsidian kamas. But then again, Eoko was an enigma-nobody knew anything about her, except her gender. With the Order faceplate constantly over Eoko's features, a crimson cloak covering the back of her head, and black leather armor covering her body, all that the armigers could be certain of Eoko was her gender.

Nobody could deny Eoko's skill, however. With those strange dual scythes, Eoko could strike lightning fast, and often, when she was sparring with the others, the fight was over before it could properly begin.

Eoko simply sat there, analyzing the devil, trying to learn its strengths and weaknesses while it fought one of the others...

Knowledge (planes): 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (19) + 2 = 21

I have Talaos' implanted memories up as well.

What about feedback on Talaos?

Alright, here's my character.

Alright, I have the backstory, now I just need to work on crunch.

BTW, He Who Was There Before and He Who Should Not Be are kinda like the Lords of Order and the Lords of Chaos: you can't really root for either of them, because they care about nothing but destroying the other and protecting themselves-which is exactly why Before wanted Kaefor to deliver her map (after being TOLD it was complete) to the Nexus in order to completely finalize the universe, eliminating a large amount of chaos.

Quote:

Kaefor Wanderer

Added. Edit: Nevermind, that's not an allowed class.

Quote:

I just need to know what GM is going next and who will be in the encounter, etc.

GMs usually announce when they have an encounter then list who will be involved. They typically do it in discussion but we can start doing it in recruitment if it would make it easier.

Huh, I thought that any class from Paizo was allowed...

Oh well.

EDIT: Oops, I just realized that any core or base class. It didn't mention advanced classes.

This is my warpriest (Note: Her power is internal, not external, so she has custom domains).

If it's good, add me to the list.

Hey, Rednal, are the Golemoid and Steamwright classes, as well as the Jurak race, allowable in this game?

I'm thinking this for my background:

How was that?