Gypsumay continues her barrage with the much more accurate fire of a musket. "I am taking the cost of these rounds out of your guild you annoying oograh eaters."
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Benris continues to unload his weapon into the assassin leader.
vs. touch
Fionna, grinning, goes around the rubble and debris behind the corpse of the man with the shattered legs, closing with the archers on the other side. "Evenin' fellas. Figured we could make this a bit more up close 'n personal like." With a howl, the dwarf barrels through the assassin and, if she gets a chance, through the ones next to him too.
Jon smiles to himself as the little dwarf smashes through the nearby assassins. He also notes with interest Benris's zeal regarding the corpse of the assassin leader, wondering whether they had perhaps known each other in the past. As an arrow whizzes by his head he turns, locates the shooter, and closes with him. Jon attempts to throw a hammer-fist at the bridge of the assassin's nose.
Attack:
Damage:
Jon ducks under the reach of the crossbowman and releases a vicious uppercut aimed at the protruding jaw of the foe.
Attack:
Damage:
Rupert's movements started to get jerky as the loss of blood and unbalanced emotions, despite the seeming lack of them upon his face, mixed. So with much effort, Rupert would load his gun once more and take aim at the closest target that was still standing before loosing his shot...
...then, as the piece of hot lead left the barrel of his pitol, he would fall prone behind the pile of debris in an attempt to prevent any further crossbow bolts finding their target in his hide.
Fionna whirls around, bringing around the hammer mostly by momentum alone, swinging towards the nearest assassin in a mostly-blind stagger of inertia and force. It's pretty obvious the dwarf is moving simply because she's moving, like a sort of perpetual motion machine of destruction, and until she runs into something more solid than she is or something that hits back harder than she does, she's liable to simply crash around the terrain and barrel over anything that gets in her way.
Fortunately for her companions, that's mostly just the guys who have been shooting at them for the past thirty seconds or so.
Gypsumay will continue to fire into the enemies.
Benris trods on the body of the assassin leader as he gets in position to clean up the rest of the group.
Fionna squints irritably at the clacks note, turning it over several times then tapping out the beat of the semaphore pattern on her armor thoughtfully. "Stage two? What was bloody Stage one?"
Gypsumay takes a quick look at the assassin guild paraphanalia.
"Who cares, we were just targeted by a fake guild team. Whoever is try to get rid of us I am guessing we are just an afterthought. Probably just annoying loose ends. I am starting to get that feeling like there is an oncoming flood and no one brought floaties."
"Well, that's a blow to the ol' ego. At least we have all their money to console us. Which way out now?"
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Moving gingerly to minimize the pain of his wounds, Jon picks up the quarterstaff that he discarded during the fight. He looks around at the carnage.
"I say we talk to the Assassin's guild. I bet they would have something to say about unlicensed assassination and they might help us get to the bottom of things. Or perhaps the engravers guild might know something."
Fionna scans about after Benris's inquiry, looking for a reasonable passage that might lead to the surface, starting with back behind the way the assassins came.
Rupert would take his time stowing his pistol away and dusting himself off before gathering up his suitcase once more.
"What makes you say they were a fake team?" he would inquire when Gypsumay brings it up.
"Trust me. See where this pin has all these fidly bits? Real assassin pins don't have all those, and just look at the spelling on these license."
Rupert would put up no resistance as they were taken into custody and brought to stand, well sit, before the patrician Lord Vetinari himself. He was not sure what this was about, but he felt little need to make a bad situation worse, especially when he was as banged up as he was. Instead, he would wait patiently without a word until the patrician decided to pay them sort of attention, all the while noting the little things that might come in handy later on.
As soon as the other man leaves, Benris stands again and offers his hand.
"Benris, Benris Carr. Maybe you've heard of me? A pleasure to meet you sir!"
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Gypsumay is too annoyed with the whole preceding to notice anything but the sound of her own annoyance. "First someone explodes the party, then some fake assassins try to kill us, and now we are dragged in like common criminals. What you going to do? Threaten us with alternatives until we meekly forget about the whole thing? Cause I am so going to press charges."
Fionna is quiet. She's heard about the Patrician - who in Ankh-Morpork, or quite a few places out of it, hasn't? - and frankly she's not sure what's rumor and what's true and what's both. The dwarf was exceptionally reluctant to relinquish her hammer and musket on the way in, but is silently assuaged by the fact that, if she felt the need, she could use her rotund little body as a sufficient weapon in most cases.
On top of that, she's confident they've done nothing wrong. They didn't make the hole in the floor - and Fionna herself would be the first to tell you, she's an expert at making holes in things, on purpose or otherwise - and they certainly didn't initiate hostilities with the gang of fake assassins. From what she knew of the city, Vetinari ran a tight ship; she imagined he wouldn't take kindly to fakes of any sort trying to do someone's job.
For the moment she planted her feet in place, concentrated on not tripping over them, and waited for the fallout from her companions. And resisted the urge to apply palm to forehead when the troll... well, acted like a troll. It was a close thing, though, and her hand was already halfway up before she realized it and shoved it back down to her side.
Rupert look upon the patrician with his usually stony demeanor. After giving himself a moment to mull over the patrician's offer, an overly kind term for what was happening, he would speak up, "Just to make sure that I am on the same page as you. You believe that we are not the perpetrators of this crime and in order to prevent ourselves from being hanged for something that we did not do, you want to put us to work solving this case?.
"So ya want us to be good little detectives and find out for you, the great and powerful patrician, who decided to blow us up and try and have us killed. I tell ya what, ya let me put a bullet in every single person that had anything to do with this and ya don't try to come after me and we are square. Your little detectives get in my way and I put a round in dem as well, got it?"
"It would be my absolute pleasure, sir! Would this then make us, ah, honorary members of the Watch?"
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"I believe that you merely hinted at an answer, but either way I don't think a straightforward answer is needed in this case. However, I'm not sure how well the public is going to take to us walking among them after this fiasco." Turning his head to regard his business partners, Rupert would continue on to ask, "Do you think it would be of benefit to perhaps disguise ourselves for the time being?"
Benris visibly deflates. "Oh. I see. Well then, I'm sure it'll all come out in the papers soon enough. Where should we start?"
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Fionna squints slightly at Rupert. Given that when the Patrician makes you an offer it's typically considered unwise to refuse, she's had nothing to say thus far other than the occasional nod. But the fellow has a good question, and it's actually addressed her way (if not exclusively so) so the dwarf at last deigns to speak up.
"Well, considerin' we'll be by necessity workin' at cross-purposes with th' Watch, who I 'magine'll be lookin' for folks matchin' our general descriptions, it ain't a bad idea." There is a bit of a grumble before the dwarf goes on. "What of us can manage disguises anyway," she adds, glancing at the troll, then turns back to Rupert. "Longer we can go without gettin' int'rupted or chased or in-terror-gated, the better our chances o' figgerin' this out are."
"OK, where's the nearest paper boy? I want to see what they said about me."
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Whatever they say, I'm probably gonna need the sadl.
After giving the man a moment to read the article, Rupert will inquire into its contents.
"What have you learned Benris?"
"I learned those business cards were a bad investment; they didn't even remember MY name. Also, we may want to start the investigation with the 'ortham brothers."
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"Hmm...they could be suspects, but neither of them gave me the sense of wanting to take charge of this project. However, fame and fortune can be quite the motivational tool," Rupert would say in a monotone voice.
"I feel it might be prudent that we rest before starting our investigation. Many of us have taken wounds and could use some time to heal before continuing on."
"Aye, can't argue with ya there."
"It also seems likely that we might be attacked at some point through the night, so I would suggest we choose to all stay in a singular location or make plans to meet at a specified time and place tomorrow."